Carla_Abellana_article.jpgIn this article, actress Carla Abellana shares that before she became a showbiz star, she lived a “quiet, normal life.” The daughter of actor Rey “PJ” Abellana and granddaughter of legendary actress Delia Razon shot to fame last year when she played Rosalinda in the local adaptation of the eponymous Mexican soap opera. Now Carla enjoys a cushy spot among the entertainment industry’s A-list starlets—something she would never have imagined for herself as an admittedly “quiet and very shy person.”

“[Fame] did change my life,” shares the 23-year-old actress. “…I was able to come out of my shell. I’m now outgoing. I relate to people… I’m really enjoying life more ‘cause na-realize ko na there’s really a lot more to [it].”

Certainly, being shy can deprive you of many joys of living. Timid, introverted people often feel uncomfortable in social situations—some to the point of crippling anxiety—and this prevents them from expressing themselves in public and making new friends.

But shyness isn’t a life sentence or a chronic illness—it’s simply a social handicap that can be overcome with practice. So if you are as shy as Carla once was, here are a few suggestions to help you get over your bashful nature.


To overcome your shyness, you’ve got to be willing to take the necessary action. Find the willpower to come out of your shell and believe in your ability to change for the better! It won’t be easy, but it will certainly be worth it once you’ve succeeded.


Practice makes perfect, as they say. This guide says that rehearsing how you would act in a social setting beforehand can help greatly in your actual “performance.” Additionally, this article recommends that you mentally prepare smalltalk topics before attending a social function so that you have something to fall back on when there is a lull in conversation.


This article suggests that you pick one small social action to carry out each day. You could strike up a conversation with the guy you ride the elevator with at work, or simply make eye contact with the waitress who is taking your order. Once you’ve mastered that skill, move on to the next “small thing” on your list and make your way up to bigger gestures from there.


Body language is an important part of any kind of social interaction. Make sure that yours is open and friendly, rather than closed off and preoccupied. This article says that good posture, clear speech, smiling, and relaxed (rather than forced) laughter can contribute to your approachability. This will draw people to you and make them want to get to know you better.


It would also be helpful to do something “out of character” (your character being quite inhibited) in order to expand your social horizons, as well as find release. This article suggests something “outlandish, like sky-diving,” which will give you a sense of liberation. After you’ve accomplished such a daring deed, talking to people you’ve just met will seem like a piece of cake.

(Photo courtesy of

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