For many of us, marriage is an eye-opener, and no matter how many years we'd spent as boyfriend and girlfriend, there are always a few new things (and not all of them good) to learn once we've tied the knot and are living together. These may be as trivial as loud snoring or a discovery as serious as drug addiction. Rather than feeling that lumagay ka na sa tahimik, we may actually find ourselves on a grueling journey of uncertainty.

Turbulent episodes are common in marriage. That’s because you have two very different personalities who may have different backgrounds and outlooks in life sharing a home--most likely for the first time. These differences can lead to conflicts that can strain a marriage or forge a stronger bond.

But the secret of a strong marriage is both partners’ willingness to help each other grow, rather than helping only oneself. It's also important to be clear-sighted in terms of seeing your partner for who he is and having realistic expectations about your marriage.

So if you're feeling frustrated with your other half, you may want to remind yourself of the eight things listed below to help you deal.


For more marriage tips, check out these FN articles:

• Speak Up: 5 Tips to Better Communication with Your Husband
• For Better or Worse: 8 Tips to Live Happily Ever After with Your Husband
• Heat It Up: 10 Ways to Flirt with Your Hubby
• Make It Last: 5 Elements of a Healthy Relationship
• True Love: 8 Secrets to a Happy Marriage

(First published in Good Housekeeping Magazine, Your Marriage section as "When Reality Kicks In" on September 2003; adapted for use in Female Network)