So you were convinced he’s your Prince Charming since the moment you laid eyes on him. Everything seemed so perfect at first, but lately it seems that the romance is starting to fizzle out. Is it time to start worrying?
Not really. Cosmopolitan US assures us that every romantic relationship is cyclical, and that “facing downtime isn't only inevitable, it's necessary.” So don’t worry, it’s not really you–it’s normal that the honeymoon stage will lead a plateau with either or both of you feeling that your relationship is a bit blah. However, Cosmo advises to cherish that stage as a way to get to know your partner better, instead of nursing doubts. Cosmo quotes Dr. Pepper Schwartz, author of Everything You Know About Love and Sex is Wrong, “When it comes to real love, ups and downs aren't aberrant, they're normal. It's only by moving through these highs and lows of a relationship that you can reach the deepest level of connection and forge a lasting relationship."
But how do you keep your fairytale romance from falling apart? Here are five tips to keep you and your man from having an “unhappily ever after” ending:
1. GIVE EACH OTHER SOME BREATHING SPACE
Cuddling up to each other for an entire weekend seems ideal–but not when you do it every weekend. Couples who isolate themselves from the rest of the world tend to get sick of each other easily, and walk an unhealthy line towards co-dependency. There’s no harm in letting each other explore the world separately. Go out with your own group of friends from time to time, so that you don’t feel stifled by each other’s (constant) presence.
2. ENJOY BEING COMFORTABLE WITH EACH OTHER
Try to enjoy each other’s company, whether you’re dressed to the nines or just lounging in your PJs. It’s important to be yourself when you’re with your guy, and he should feel the same towards you, too. If being with him seems like going on a mad race against a treadmill, then you might not be really MFEO (made for each other).
3. DON'T PASS UP ON AN OPPORTUNITY TO SHOW THAT YOU LOVE HIM
Let your man know that he makes your knees weak no matter how long you two have been together. Romance tends to leave the picture when you settle in your comfort zone. And while being his best pal is a good thing, you’re not really in a relationship just because you two are friends. Bring back the romantic spark with little surprises and affectionate words.
4. OPEN UP
Are his little quirks annoying you? Let him know! Honesty is an integral component in a relationship, and this is not limited to telling each other about past flings and exes. If you can tell him how great his sense of humor is, then you should be able to tell him how much his habitual tardiness annoys you. Potential problems get nipped in the bud by resolving to settle things straight as mature adults. For all you know, he thinks that you find his irritating habits charming.
5. FIGHT RIGHT
We get it: Men are from Mars, women are from Venus. There are times when you feel like you and your partner are worlds apart, and when things spin out of orbit, you end up violently colliding against each other. Don’t fret, fights are normal in any relationship. The trick is being able to handle it properly. Avoid making problems worse by resolving to talk it out properly after calming down and cooling your head off. Put yourself in your partner’s shoes to try to understand his point of view, and always be amenable to give up some of your rights for a balanced compromise.
For more tips on keeping your relationship fresh and strong, check out the FN articles linked below:
- Relationship Resolutions: 10 Tips to Refresh Any Romance
- How to Keep the Romance Fresh in Spite of Parenthood
- The Couple's Guide to Keeping Cool
(Photo by Andrea Rose via Flickr Creative Commons)
