They say that “first impressions last,” but most of the time, people are hesitant to show who they really are on the first date because they’re scared of being rejected or afraid that their date will be turned off by their personalities.
That’s why some experts are saying that you shouldn’t turn down a second date just because there was no spark or chemistry on the first meeting. “Attraction can involve looks, personality traits, shared experiences, and other factors,” says Michael McNulty, Ph.D., a master certified Gottman Therapist and Chicago-based couples counsellor. Aside from that, you also have to consider their drive to commit and other things like your mood; being anxious can make a big difference with how you communicate with another person.
Virginia Clark, a love expert at YourTango tells Babble that saying “no” to second dates could affect the rest of your life. “If your first date with a man is only mildly interesting and leaves you feeling rather blah, you may be tempted to write him off and move on.”
She also adds that it takes time to really get to know someone. “On a first date you’re more inclined to be looking for the qualities that usually impress you and these tend to be the more superficial ones. Let’s face it, charm and humor stand out when you first meet a man, but honesty and integrity can’t be seen.”
So before you turn down a second date with a guy you found uninteresting, give him the benefit of the doubt and say “yes!”