Between magazines, romantic comedies, and baseless cultural assumptions, women have long been guessing what men are really thinking. But the truth is that once you start to really listen to stuff we say, you’d realize that it’s not that hard to see right through us.

Read on to see what we mean:
What we say: “You look nice in that dress.”
What we really mean: “In fact, any dress will do. Can we go now?”
Patience and tolerance are and will never be our strongest suit, but we mean it every once in a while.

What we say: “I’m really tired.”
What we really mean: “But I still want to have sex. You be on top.”
There are a myriad of reasons (anxiety, fatigue) why men decline to do the deed, but if you insist, who are we to say no?
What we say: “Want to come over?”
What we really mean: “And have sex?”
“Coming over” is universal code for sexy time, but we don’t need to tell you that.

What we say: “I wasn’t flirting with her – she’s a good friend of mine.”
What we really mean: “I was flirting with her – but I didn’t think you’d notice.”
Granted, flirting is flirting. But it doesn’t have to lead to something more. If anything, guys only do it for social, and possibly sexual, affirmation.
What we say: “I need a night out with the guys.”
What we really mean: “I need a night out without you.”
According to Cornell University research, men who don’t have enough spare time to spend with their friends can feel less attracted to their partner. You should be practically begging us to go on a night out!
What we say: “I don’t even talk to her anymore.”
What we really mean: “But we do text from time to time.”
While we understand where you’re coming from, it’s possible for exes to find new ground in a new kind of relationship that has new boundaries. At least give us the benefit of the doubt.

What we say: “We should exercise more often.”
What we really mean: “Because you’re getting chubbier by the day.”
Along with age and money, weight is something we learned never to talk about with a woman.
What we say: “I think we should go on a break.”
What we really mean: “Because there’s this girl I want to shag and this relationship is getting in the way.”
More often than not, we’re merely looking for a way to stray without coming off as a villain.

What we say: “Where were you last night?”
What we really mean: “Not in some club making out with guys, I hope.”
We tend to get easily threatened by other men, but we’re kind of hoping you’ll find it cute.

What we say: “I don’t care, you pick.”
What we really mean: “I don’t care, you pick.”
This is not a test and we’re not trying to be difficult.
What we say: “What did I do this time?”
What we really mean: “What did you catch me doing?”
That’s because you either caught us dozing off or fooling around. Either way, guilty as charged.

What we say: “Did you come?”
What we really mean: “I’m very insecure and I need some validation here.”
You must, for our egos’ sake, say yes. Just file it under “S*** Women Say (And What They Really Mean).”

PHOTO: Mahatt Tattva Dasa/Flickr Creative Commons; GIFS: Giphy.com