With so many friends and friends of friends sharing stories of infidelity, it’s almost too easy to accept cheating as another fact of life. In fact, psychologist Christopher Ryan says that monogamy is unnatural for our species. “Our bodies, minds and sexual habits all reflect a highly sexual primate,” he writes on CNN.
Biology aside, Ryan does recognize that we have the power to make our own decisions. The question is, are we capable of resisting temptation? If there are existing problems in the relationship, can we work on them with our partners instead of pursuing other distractions?
Our GIRLTalkers weigh in on the issue.
1. If even rich, sexy, and smart doctors who are married to kindly pastors get cheated on, what about the rest of us?
“Is cheating inevitable? I don't know, but you can see it everywhere. I have a very good friend na doktora (mayaman, sexy, matalino) and yung husband niya pastor, family-oriented, from maayos na family na walang record ng cheating, mom or dad, BUT nagkaroon din ng kabit. Hay, so sad. Basta you will know the red flags when you see them, but in the meantime, you and your partner should relax and enjoy your relationship to the fullest.” -From GIRLTalker break_free
2. It can happen to anyone.
“I refuse to believe that all husbands will eventually cheat at one point in their lives. Alam naman natin yan. Pero it doesn't give us a license to be blind and live in our bubble of a happy married life. Tama si athletic dude. Forewarned is forearmed. You don't know what's going to happen a month, a year from now so it's best to keep the fire burning with hubby. It's just a reminder to be vigilant because most marriages break down because they 'let things happen.' They let themselves drift away from each other until pag gising mo mag-isa ka nalang sa bangka.” - From GIRLTalker Maiandra
3. It's not just the men, you know.
(Screencap from Last Night courtesy of Tribeca Film)
“I also think cheating is not exclusive to men lang. Marami ding babae ang nanlalaki. I have two close friends who cheated on their men. Mas madaldal talaga lang mga babae, kaya it appears that guys cheat on women more often than us. It's just guys don't normally pour their heart out on forums nor talk about it (women cheating on them) with other guys.” -From GIRLTalker Reservoir Dogs
4. Happy people cheat, too.
“It does happen to a lot of people and it's hard to tell who will cheat or not. A guy friend told me that guys do it because they're unhappy, but nah. There are men who say they are blissfully married to their wives but end up having a one-night stand or full-blown affair. It’s the itch, I guess.” -From GIRLTalker hisana
5. Hope springs eternal.
“I'm only 20 years old and at this point, I am still, deep inside, hopeful of the "bright" future ahead. That includes getting married to a loyal husband. But hearing news about this makes me lose faith in...men. I have a guy friend who is married. He is this oh-so-nice and loyal-looking guy. Then it's just recently that I found out he is courting our friend. DAMN. Sakit nun malaman both as their common friend and as a girl. Although I kinda know na "inevitable" na may temptation pero sana naman hindi inevitable ang pangangaliwa.” -From GIRLTalker oshiawase
6. Did someone say a few good men?
“May naging co-worker ako sa Middle East six years ago na din... Nung bago lang ako dun ang chismis nag-iisa lang siyang guy dun na hindi nagkaron ng other woman, while his wife nasa Pinas at siya nga sa Middle East... More than 15 years na siya nag wo-work dun as cashier, hindi naman siya pangit, hindi din naman siya kaguapuhan pero napakabait niya... Kuya namin siya pero hindi siya ganon ka tanda naman... At nakita ko kung gaano nga talaga siya ka loyal at faithful sa wife niya grabe... Ang swerte swerte ng wife niya... Nakakatuwa lang na kahit papano may mga ganon pang mga lalake... Kahit naman father-in-law ko faithful din sa mother-in-law ko. -From GIRLTalker preciosa