Boy meets girl, both fall in love, and they live happily ever after. Sounds swell, right? If only dating and love were that easy. The truth is, mind games are par for the course (i.e. Men and women can sometimes act disinterested so as not to look too available). Aptly called The Chase, this stage has its kilig moments, but it can be tiring, too, especially when you're giving it your all and he doesn't seem as interested. It's mentally and emotionally exhausting to decode a man's behavior and to expect things to happen, but if you know the signs, you won't have to waste your time. Below are some of the red flags to watch out for.
You often make the first move.
While there's nothing wrong with making the first move, the lack of interest on his part is demotivating and says a lot about what he thinks of you. The same goes for when you two only go out when it's convenient for him. As tough as it is to swallow, you may have to accept the fact that you're just a spare tire that he needs when he gets bored.
You don't communicate often.
He doesn't call you often and takes way too long to reply to your messages, but when you're together, he's always on his phone. Obviously, you're not a priority.
He doesn't introduce you to his close friends and family.
You're his secret girl. Sure, it sounds exciting at first, but let it go on long enough, and you'll be stuck in that limbo without the right to demand.
He's open to talking about other women with you.
He may just be testing to see how you would react, but it's plain rude to talk about him dating other women when he's supposed to be wooing you.
He tries to change you.
He's often critical with the way you dress, your hobbies, and even your choice of friends. He often focuses on what's wrong with you. If his comments are more of commands rather than constructive criticism, then he's not really into you.
The arrangement is more physical.
If he only calls you past midnight or when he's drunk, most likely, he's only interested to get into your pants. You shouldn't just be a warm body. A guy who really likes you would want to get to know your personality.
He's not consistent.
He's sweet today, yet he turns as cold as ice on the next date. Leave while there is still time.
He doesn't want to commit.
Whether it's marriage or putting a label on it, if he's too iffy to make things official, he's just not that into you.
He never runs out of excuses.
A man will do whatever it takes to get the girl. As the Filipino saying goes, "Kapag ayaw may dahilan, 'pag gusto palaging mayroong paraan." If you all you hear are excuses, it's time to walk away. Life is too short to waste your time on someone who's not head over heels for you. You deserve better.
SCREENCAP: The Ugly Truth/Columbia Pictures (2009); GIFS: Giphy