Men who are committed to their partners tend to take it upon themselves to be the rock that their relationships stand on. Although they may not yet be fathers, they tend to lay the foundation that would make them worthy of the title haligi ng tahanan when they have a family of their own.

However, men are not invincible. We have legitimate fears that haunt us while we’re in a committed relationship. Here are some of those fears, in no particular order:

1. Losing our partner

This, obviously, is one of our fears. It may or may not involve another romantic partner–it could be because of the girl’s family, friends, distance, life goals, or maybe she just outgrew the relationship. Whatever the case may be, we won’t get into a serious relationship knowing we’ll eventually break up, so we’re very much concerned about outside factors that might affect our relationship. 


2. A third party
While men are stereotypically known to play around, there are those of us who really want to be in a relationship. However, women can fool around with anyone, too. To you, I say, we get hurt as much as girls do when they are left by their partners. Women aren’t always the victims you know.


3. Helplessness
Does your boyfriend keep bugging you every 10 minutes while you’re at a party he’s not invited to? Does he call you to check where you are even when you've already said you’re on your way home? He’s not the only one. When we’re not within your proximity, we think the worst because we can’t help you. We understand that you can take care of yourself, but we’re just wired to always want to protect you, and we’re always afraid of not being able to when we’re not right beside you. 


4. Positive, two lines
While we don’t promote premarital sex, we understand that it is not out of the ordinary. That being said, one of our worst fears is being told that our partner’s home pregnancy test came out as positive. We’d love to be fathers one day, but as long as we don’t have wedding rings on each other’s fingers, we’re not ready yet. An even worse fear is if that result came from a fling while we’re dating another girl. 


5. Non-performance

In relation to the last fear, not being to satisfy our partners in the bedroom is another thing we fear most. We take pride in what we can do in the bedroom, and if we don’t actually satisfy you, it makes us feel less of a man. It’s a fear that doesn’t stop as, well, men lose potency as we age, and we fear the day that we’ll no longer be able to satisfy anyone intimately as much as women fear the age when they could no longer bear children. 


6. Financial inadequacy
They say money can’t buy love, but love alone can’t feed you or let you enjoy nice things. We love to spoil our women in any way we can and most of the time, we need money to do that. In these days where women are empowered, we fear the time when we need you more than you need us. We want to be the person you can rely on, not the person who’ll add to your burdens. 


7. Commitment
Ironically, we fear commitment even if we’re already committed. It takes time for us to conquer our fear of the "next step" of our relationship. Unlike women who are most concerned about their body clock (i.e. ability to bear children), our main concerns are emotional and financial stability. Are we really ready to settle down with one girl for the rest of our lives? Can our income provide the basic needs of our future family? Unless we can answer both those with a resounding yes,  (especially the first), you probably won’t be getting proposed to just yet. 

PHOTO: Pixabay; GIFs: Giphy 

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