Getting over a split—whether it’s been one week or one year—is easier said than done. There’s the initial shock that you’re suddenly unattached, followed by the slow-setting pain of losing or letting go of someone you love. Both are likely punctuated by lots of crying either by yourself or with your girlfriends, intermittent cussing, and rare bouts of clarity in between. It’s not pretty, but as Rihanna’s song goes “What is love without tragedy?”
That said, you can’t spend all that time bawling your eyes out either. Here, we list down 10 things you can do while stuck in lovers' limbo.
1. Clean out his things.
Still have his baby pictures and his college letter jacket? Return them by post. You need to purge your system of all things that represent your ex. Get a close friend to help you out, so you won’t end up getting lost in the memories.
2. Get back in shape.
Being in a relationship has made you a little too comfortable on your butt. Take this opportunity to start exercising again, not necessarily because you want him to regret letting you go (or not trying hard enough to make the relationship work), but because you need a break in your routine. Instead of moping around at home, hit the gym or the village park.
3. Change your number.
If your ex is the type to call and text every day, consider changing your number or blocking him completely. You need a clean break—how else are you going to move on and build a life for yourself if he keeps hanging about? And if he can’t respect that, then all the more reason to keep your distance.
4. Read more.
Books can help you arrive faster at a realization. Reading Bridget Jones’ Diary, for example, might make you value yourself more, while reading Gone Girl might make you grateful not to have to deal with a missing spouse.
5. Get your hair cut and colored.
Your life may have lost some of its luster, but while you're still in recovery, work with what you have. Schedule an appointment with your favorite salon and do something different with your hair. Let this change be the beginning of a new you.
6. Pay more attention to your skincare routine.
It might seem strange to find this on our list, but you have to understand that your skin is not immune to psychological stress. According to Women’s Health, you may be more likely to break out during this time. With the stress hormone cortisol on the offensive, there’s bound to be problematic oil buildup beneath your skin.
The city is not big enough for the two of you, at least, not yet. If you need time by yourself, consider leaving for the beach or for a country a few hours away by plane. Traveling, whether on your own or with your friends, is good for your soul.
8. Meet new friends.
Take your mind off your ex by going out and socializing more with others. You don’t have to start dating again if you don’t want to, but having more friends won’t hurt either.
9. Watch lots of feel-good movies.
In lieu of your favorite rom-coms, watch films that'll leave you with an appreciation for art, beauty, and life itself. Our suggestions: Under the Tuscan Sun, Eat Pray Love, and Julie & Julia.
10. Try out new things.
The best way to forget about old memories is to build new ones on top of them. Go out and do something you normally wouldn’t do, say, try being a vegetarian for a few weeks or start a personal diary. By immersing yourself in new experiences, you’re taking back your life and living it according to your own terms. From here on out, it’s all about you.
PHOTOS: Ewan/Flickr Creative Commons, Florin Gorgan/Flickr Creative Commons, Pedro Skezely/Flickr Creative Commons