Long Distance Relationship, Does it even work?

[kwang sun]

^awww that's so sweet  sis ah.. but then again sometimes.. the opinions of others especially those around you can bring you down ..

[freeswan]

before i don't believe that it works pero when I met my bf, you will really try your very best to make it work.

We've been in a ldr now for more than a year. mahirap pero basta gusto niyo ang isa't isa, kaya niyo yan.

[cecil65]

Long distance relationship does work. I'm a living proof of it. I started my long distance relationship last 2004 and it took us 3 years before we can meet personally kasi laging nagkakahassle pag scheduled na sya to fly to Manila. Constant and regular communication through text, chat, email is a big factor kasi kahit magkalayo, you still feel connected and nagkikita kayo kahit papano. Now we are already married and based here in Switzerland and our relationship is going stronger. Importante lang kasi is trust and fate aside from love. Wag masyado makikinig sa mga sinasabi ng ibang tao. Ang importante is kayong dalawa ang nagkakaintindihan.

[kwang sun]

wow sis .. 3 years???     .. amazing!!

[cecil65]

yes sis 3 years...pero we communicate several times everyday. it's quite long but it was worth the wait for both of us

[kwang sun]

mga sis  does it sound absurd if he tells you na he wants to marry you but then  ni hindi pa nga nageffort na pumunta sa pinas ?  we've been talking for 10 months I think , but then narealize ko parang walang patutunguhan so inistop ko yung communication . tapos sinabi niya he wants to marry me .. but then ni hindi pa nga nagvisit  diba?

[baliwsayo]

how will you know if love ka talaga ngisang tao sa isang ldr relationship?  mas madali naman kasi magsabi ng sweet things pero paano mo nga ba malalaman kung love ka talaga?

Pag consistent siya makipagcommunicate sa yo. Yung maski busy siya nagrereply siya pag nagtext ka.

Di pa pala kayo nagkikita? Naku wag mo muna seryosohin till you see him in person.

[kwang sun]

^ kinalimutan ko na nga sis haha..

[|:AyemZia:|]

i'm not really a believer in LDR kahit noon pa. hindi ko pa naman siya naeexperience kase nga ayoko siyang ma-experience. hehe!
tingin ko kase super mahirap to. and never pa tlaga ako nag-entertain ng someone na malayo sa ken.

but here's my dilemma now: i've met a guy, more than 2 years ago, sa isang social networking site. he's Pinoy and he lives in Lipa, Batangas. we texted and communicated almost everyday eversince we met online. then he started making "paramdams" na he likes me na. he even came to the point na tlagang niligawan nya ako. pero by that time, hindi ko tlaga feel maging romantically involved with him. so parang bigla ko na lang siya iniwan sa ere and hindi na ulet nagparamdam. gang sa nawala na yung sim ko na yun. and then, just this month, out of nowhere, bigla na lang siyang nagtext dun sa isang number ko. yun pala naibigay ko din sa kanya yung number ko na yun 2 years ago. he just thought na hindi akin yun that time kaya hindi nya tinetext. (we used to text kase using smart, pero may globe number din kase ako nun, once ko lang ata ginamit to text him pero nasave nya pala sa old phone nya) then to make the boring story short, nagkaron ulet ng constant communication between us. shempre andun yung kamustahan kase nga tagal namen hindi nagkausap. madami na pala nangyare sa kanya, nakapag-abroad na siya and kakauwe lang nya MAY this year. sadly, he was about to return abroad siguro days na lang from now. kaya nga mejo frustrated siya kung bakit late na kame nagkausap ulet. he's pursuing me again now. ang problema ko nga, aalis na siya ulet. and sabe ko nga d ba i don't believe na para sa ken ang LDR. i liked him more now kesa 2 years ago kase i can see na tlagang hindi siya nagbago sa ken kahit basta ko na lang siya iniwan noon. pero ayoko pa rin kase irisk na sagutin siya tas hindi naman pala ako makakatagal sa LDR namen.

what do you think guys/gals? should i give him a shot o tlagang i should wait na lang ulet another 2 years para bumalik siya, para malaman ko kung tlagang pwede kame. kase pinagwoworry daw nya baka daw pagbalik nya after 2 years, hindi na daw ako free. FYI, we're at the same age and he knows everything about me (being a single mom and all). hindi pa rin kame nagkikita personally. gusto nyang makipagkita before siya umalis pero i'm scared e. don't know where the fear is coming from. need your insights badly. TIA!

[purple_md]

^Sis |:AyemZia:| i think you should give it a try. Not all LDR doesn't work some of them do, may kilala ako okay naman sila ngayon and they are married na. Tignan mo after 2 years he still tried to communicate with you. Meet him before he leaves so you can talk personally. Doesn't mean naman na kayo na agad pag nagkita kayo

[kwang sun]

ldr won't work kung iba yung expectation ng s.o sa partner niya

[introvertpixie]

i'm in an ldr now, and he's coming to the phils in less than 30 days.

puro sex nasa isip. niyaya pa ko ng threesome nakakainis. Naiisip ko tuloy na puro sex lang nasa isip nya kaya siya umuwi dito sa pinas for me. Parang di naman ako yung binalikan nya e. Parati rin kami nagaaway ngayon ewan ko ba. naiinis na ko sa ldr na to. kung di ko lang mahal to matagal na ko kumawala e.

[baliwsayo]

Introvertpixie, nagsex na ba kayo dati? Kung hindi pa scary naman yan.

Ayemzia, meet him muna in person tska ka mag analyze, sayang effort kasi, magkaiba kasi ang on line at in person.

[introvertpixie]

^yes po. Nung una siya umuwi sa pinas hindi pa kami. Tapos eventually naging kami rin po. Tapos dati ayaw ko magskype sex kasi alam ko naman po na di ako sexy pero he conviced me eventually. Tapos eto uuwi na po siya sa 30th although paguwi sex agad nasa isip.

Hindi ko tuloy maintindihan na kung ako ba yung inuwian nya dahil mahal nya ko. Or tigang lang siya and wants to stay faithful kaya umuwi dito to have sex =( ngayon di ko siya kinakausap. I've waited a year to be with him again pero parang simula last month puro sex sinasabi pag uwi ganito ganyan. Parang di na ko excited umuwi siya sis

[simang]

I was in a sort of LDR with my 2nd boyfriend for 7 years. We broke up eventually for so many reasons.

I have friends who are currently in an LDR din, and i have so much faith na kakayanin nila. Most of them 2 years ng magkalayo (dahil sa contract ng partner nila abroad).

Here's what I think. Pag nag-agree kayo sa LDR, dapat may goal kayo parehas, especially sa time frame. Kase kami ng ex ko, i was studying here in manila and he was working sa province, and yes we communicated everyday, we see each other mga once every 2 or 3 months, pero sa long term hindi clear kung kelan ba talaga kami magkakasama (as a couple na hindi na ldr). Do we settle in one place after i graduate? Hindi ko alam. As in no clear vision of where we'll be (geographically speaking) in the future. And i guess that's one huge mistake of ldr couples.

I have a friend nung hs, super maloko sya and hindi mo iisiping magiging loyal sa babae. He had a gf and after a yr of being together the girl had to leave for a 2-yr work contract abroad. They also communicate everyday, and see each other through skype. But you know what makes the LDR thing work for them? Alam nila parehas kase na uuwi si girl after 2 years. Kumbaga, may endgoal sila parehas. Kahit pa 2, 5, 10 years yan, i think it is important na naglolook forward kayo doon sa time na magkakasama kayo. And it has to be concrete and real, hindi puro plano lang (na uuwi ganito ganyan, pero di naman nangyayare).

What I'm saying is in an LDR, the relationship should not be open ended. Na "kakayanin natin to" lang. Dapat may concrete goal at the end of the LDR. Like, we'll no longer be LDR after 2 yrs, or susunod si guy doon after several months. Kahit gano pa yan katagal, basta dapat may time frame. I think it makes a lot of difference.

[kwang sun]

Sis introvertpixie, may possibility nga sex ang habol.. But what would you do?  A man can leave pag nakuha ka na niya ..

[alice_alice]

LDR for almost a year now and nappreciate ko na he makes time for me, as in kung may pagkakataong tumawag siya saken gagawin niya. Extra effort talaga since twice a year lang siya nakakauwi. Mahirap pero kailangang kayanin, pasasaan at magkakasama rin kami pag nakaipon na siya ng pang put up ng business. Sana wag siyang matempt lalo na't nasa malayong lugar siya. 

[naturallyposh]

How do you know banif the guy has definite plans? Kasi syempre i don't want him to be pressured kung kunyari mag ask ako kung may plano ba sya sa akin.. In LDR rin.

[simang]

^this soungs cliche pero i would still say communication is the key, you dont necessarily have to ask explicitly na kelan ba tayo magkakasama, or ano bang plano mo sa akin, kase i guess if you guys are in a committed relationship, these conversations should happen naturally. Minsan kase we're too afraid to open long term future conversation with our partner kase 'we might ruin it' pero if you guys are comfortable with each other there shouldn't be any pressure in either party

[pan.ian4ever]

it works..yes!!!ang mahirap lang sa long distance relationship eh hindi mo kapiling yung taong mahal mo...hindi mo sya maalagaan kung may sakit siya. hindi mo makita nang personal kung kumusta na siya, and worst bigla siyang mawala nang hindi mo alam.

i am in a long distance relationship and i fear i might lose my bf one of these days at hindi ko yun malaman...ang sakit na ang huling pag-uusap nyo ay alam mo'ng sobrang takot din siya at wala kang magawa para macomfort siya...