Wives, can you be SUBMISSIVE to your husbands ba talaga?

[suikorayne]

yes.. it's biblical po..

[shiftingsands]

i can submit to my (future) husband if i believe in his ability to lead. my ex kasi we lived together with our child. lagi niya complain is i don't submit to him and i don't respect his decisions.

how can i submit to him kung pareho naman kame kumikita pero ako lang gumagastos sa lahat ng bills pati sa gastos para sa anak namin. siya puro sa bisyo niya lang napupunta pera niya nakakapos pa siya and humuhugot pa sa ipon ko.

hindi lang din sa financial aspect. pati personality niya weak, siya mismo nagsabi na he breaks under pressure daw.

[ebiko]

depends ... but mas strong kasi ang personality ko kesa kay hubby ... 

[babymom20]

still honestly working hard on it.. sobrang effort na pero hindi pa rin talaga eh.. hope sooner..personality issues na rin siguro to.

[Amphitrite]

no

I was born with a brain. I was studying for 17 years before we met. I continued studying after we met. I'm still studying now even after we had our child.

I can never be 100% submissive. Not even if he is 8 years older than me. I have the right to think and to speak for myself and for our son.

He knows that I value communication and respects me for who I am. He does not expect me to be 100% submissive. He is the one who encourages me to decide from time to time.

We talked about this even before we became girlfriend and boyfriend, and I'm so happy we did.

[kaiz]

when i was still single, plan ko maging submissive. Ang hirap
pala! Haha! Pagdating sa kung ano ang gusto ng bawat isa sa amin, hubby and i are both outspoken, dyan nagsisimula argument namin. sa totoo lang, kaya ko naman yata maging submissive, hubby is mas madaming beses lang na palpak kesa hindi kaya ganun. Actually i'm trying really hard na maging submissive and sundin siya kahit alam ko palpak again ang ending. Perl ang hirap. Sige lang, tfh lang ng try for now.

[ladykristinn]

hindi ko kaya. I'm a born leader. sabi nila even older can't help but follow my advice. si hubby kasi medyo shy while I'm frank. kapag nag aaway kami lagi nyang sinasabi na "lagi ka na lang tama". pero proven fact naman na ako laging tama sa aming dalawa. hehe...

[Gabrielle Andre]

ang masasabi ko lang, marriage is a partnership, hindi naman pwedeng isa lang ang may say sa lahat.

i had a marriage where after a few years of tiring quarrels/misunderstandings with my man dahil nga matigas ulo ko, stubborn din siya. I'm thankful I learned to embrace that biblical concept of marriage which is wives must submit to their husbands, and husbands should love their wives. And i realized the wisdon behind this verse.
ganito yung nangyari sa akin, natuto akong mag submit, i showed my husband i supported him all the way. He sometimes made decisions which ayaw ko or alam kong hindi maganda for our family... sinasabi ko sa kanya opinion ko kasi hindi naman porket nag-asawa ako eh nawala na utak ko. I tell him what I feel, pero I also tell him that if it's what he wants I'll support him and sumbit to him. Thats where the 2nd part of the verse comes in= husbands love your wives.

Nakita niya he had me and will always have me kahit ano pa man mangyari,  he learned to appreciate me more kasi naramdaman niya i respected him and his ideas, so in return sobrang minahal niya ako and we became real life partners, so we lived together for a year and a half without arguments (syempre may konting tampuhan about issues like 'bakit hindi mo sinabi na gagabihin ka pala sa office or bakit hindi daw ako nagpaalam sa kanya na punta kami ni baby sa mall ' minsan pero a few minutes after resolved na, pero yung away na tungkol sa plano or kung ano ang dapat gawin wala na eh)..and sadly God called him home to heaven na.

there is a big difference between being a submissive wife and a becoming a doormat.
tulad ng lagi niyang sinasabi sa akin in the early days of our marriage when puro nalang kami away kasi ayoko sumunod sa kanya or kinokontra ko decisions niya kasi akala ko mas maganda yung mga ideas ko  " Di ba, dapat ikaw ang katuwang ko sa lahat ng bagay? Eh bakit feeling ko ngayon I have to compete with you for everything? Di ba mag-asawa tayo, dapat we should complement each other, you should be my strength in my weakness and vice versa? Nakakapagod makipag compete with someone you live with and sleep with." Ayun natauhan ako...buti nalang nagkaroon kami ng chance na mabago yun before he passed away.

[Mai]

No, I can not be genuinely submissive. 

[glamorosa_09]

My hubby makes the final decisions oftentimes. But he always ask my opinion first. In the end, opinion ko madalas nyang sinusunod... haha!

I never make my strong personality dominate, I always make him feel that he is supported and is the leader.

Works best in our marriage... he feels "the man."

[Pretty_ava]

No..i can't and hindi pwede.. immature kasi ang asawa ko.. pag nag submit ako sa kanya..edi para lang kami nag bahay bahayan..

I agree, ganito din kami pero I'm trying my best lagi saka I always ask his thoughts or ideas naman pero laging mas maganda pa rin yun sa akin.   

[pmartini]

i'm trying.. nasa 60% palang ang max level, but by God's grace I hope i can fully submit in His time.=)

[betty]

im trying my best to be.
I have a strong personality thats why there are times that we clash.
I already did submit before, whatever decision he made i just agree.kasi sabi nasa lalake ang wisdom.kaso lahat palpak eh.
so thats why ako naman ang in charge. lagi pa din conflict.

so now, we talk muna before making an decision but parang mas lamang pa din ako kesa sa kanya

[mchummy]

depends upon the situation.
if alam kong may mali idea niya, di ako pumapayag.
but i'm always there to support him 

[bluewinkle]

Just to add Fr. Tanseco of CEFAM explained what that Bible verse meant during the Marriage Encounter we attended.  He said that most people pay attention only to the first verse and not the second.  Basically, a husband should serve his wife as Christ served his Church - putting her first in everything and serving her in every way possible to the point that He died for her.

Fr. Tanseco, after explaining this, then asked the husbands in the room if after finding out what the verse really means, do they still want to be "the head?" Are they capable of serving their wives to the point of dying for them?

To the wives, Fr. Tanseco posed the question, "if that were the case, what wife would not want to submit to her husband?"

What I got from that is that it's a two way street The wife does not blindly follow her husband - the husband also has a really huge responsibilty towards his wife.  And if he does this, then he'll get a really supportive wife!

[Gabrielle Andre]

^ sis bluewinkle... TUMPAK! I'm not a catholic pero tama yung priest mo, ganyan din ang pagka explain ng mga pastors ko about that verse to us....
I can really attest to that verse...ginawa namin yun and it worked for us...well for as long as he lived anyway... but im thankful pa rin.

[cassiopeia]

normally we wives have the strong personality and IMO maybe because thats the way we are.. just like EVE.

kaya as husbands they should be the head and tayo dapat maging submissive...i believe that if we follow the Master's blueprint for our marriage everything will be in his control ,,even our submission to our husband..hindi lang basta submission because thats what the bible says..but because by God's grace. We follow him and let him to be in control of our lives..and that's faith.

[jpsv72]

I am trying but thanks sa mga posts dito I want to be sana makayanan kong maging submissive sana ma control ko ang sarili ko.....
Another question sana paki pm nalang sakin, saan ako pwedeng maghanap nga marrieage councel kc i want to try para ma sort out ang differences naming mag asawa bago mahuli ang lahat, kc i am finallizing my self na for separation maybe this is the help i am looking for.
send me a message pwede. thx mga sistah....

[cassiopeia]

sis why dont you attend marriage counseling , di naman dapat na separation ang mangyari sa inyo..its so sad to see how many couples separate easily because they dont have God in the center of their relationship.. we're not perfect and we dont have the perfect relationship, but we have God and in himself we find perfection of all things.
i really want to help you sis in any way that I can help. I hope you seek God's will for you for your marriage.

[snowyice]

it's indeed biblical pero kapag hindi naman marunong yung husband mo well you need to help him and come up with the right decision