I had an emotional affair with my ex

[dismembered]

We may be wrong, but we'll make things right. We just need a chance, and time.

Sa lahat ng nabasa ko dito ako nainis! Alam ng mali, hahanap pa ng way para ma-justify at mag mukhang tama. Ang mali ay mali.

Chance? You are ruining your chance to right what is already wrong. The fact na kumakaliwa si mister ay mali na. Alam nyong mali yan. Humahanap na lang ng way para mag mukhang tama sa approval ng tao.

But then, buhay nyo yan. Wag ka na lang mainis kung maraming react sayo dito kasi nilalagay lang namin ang shoes namin sa taong kinakaliwa.  Yung pag disagree at pag criticize is to show na hindi supported yung mga ganyang gawain.

[Girltalker2]

^^tama rin Sabi ni sis hisana.
Sabi ni Guy househusband sya na can?t afford to file, at nawala Pag ka lalaki nya.
But then may shop/business naman pala! So asan na yung Kita?

If a guy wants it, he pursues.

If he wants annulment, kahit anong pigil ninuman, no one can stop him.
If he wants out of the house, madali lang din umalis.
On the other hand, if he wants to stay in that house with wife and kids, I can provide 1000 reasons for him.

Maganda rin naman ang Tanong ni Allysalicious - nagmamahal ka ba kasi you can benefit?
- I think the more appropriate question is bakit mo sinasagasaan Ibang tao kung wala ka naman benefit dito? Why commit crime/do stupid things or bad things to others eh wala ka naman benefit?
- but even if we assume that they?re doing the right thing (slim chance pero assuming nagsasabi ng totoo yung guy), nagmamahal ba tayo because we will benefit? NO.
But the answer is because sa dami ng hiwalayan, relationships are never simple. You enter into them with the basic foundation, otherwise it is bound to fail.

Wag ka na lang mainis kung maraming react sayo dito kasi nilalagay lang namin ang shoes namin sa taong kinakaliwa. 

Actually I put myself in her shoes. It is a very very terrible thing to do in your life. Not only youre wasting your life away, yung heartache na dinulot mo sa parents mo. And the lives you destroyed (kids and family ni guy) will forever haunt you.

[bratty]

The best of luck ate girl. Hopefully magmaterialize yang grand plan mo/nyo. Isa na lang, wag ka sana muna magpabuntis sa bf mo.

[Ghell06]

grabs popcorn

[mysterioza_me]

Napaka-defensive ni ate girl. Yung househusband biglang nagka-business nung nabanatan na siya. Andami ng discrepancies vs her previous post. Anyway uso naman magpalusot.

And also for me ang sex after matinding away ang isa sa pinakamasarap. Make up sex tawag dun sis hahaha. Hindi nakaka-frustrate yun kung magaling si partner at kung mahal ka nun di yun papayag sa basta makaraos lang sex.

Anyway its your life that you?re f*cking so rock and roll sis.

[fifi_girl]

The bf claims that he married his wife kase nabuntis. Okay fine. Pero naman, ang lalaki pag ayaw kang pakasalan, walang makakapilit dyan. Pero pag gusto ka pakasalan, walang din makakapigil sa kanya.

Tama yung isang sis natin dito, yung first time na nabuntis, sige sabihin natin na aksidente. Pero yung second child? Hindi na aksidente yun ate 😂😂😂

Nakakaawa yung wife. She is working hard to raise a family. Tapos isang millenial lang pala ang sisira ng marriage nila. Sabihin na nating may problema ang marriage nila, it would only mean na hindi ito ang first time na may sideline si kuya.

Mag u update naman daw siya ng kaganapan eh. Hintay nalang natin

[Girltalker2]

And also for me ang sex after matinding away ang isa sa pinakamasarap. Make up sex tawag dun sis hahaha. Hindi nakaka-frustrate yun kung magaling si partner at kung mahal ka nun di yun papayag sa basta makaraos lang sex.

Isa pa iyan, Mas intense nga dapat after a fight, coz both realise how much they love each other and miss loving each other.

[Shadow Angel]

Sabi ko nga sa post ko decided na sya wala ng makakapigil sa kanya.

About dun sa bakit ka nagmamahal kailangan ba may benefit ka? Oo naman. Katulad mo nafefeel mo love ka nya na fufulfil nya ang feelings mo. Sex benefit ka rin dahil for sure nasisiyahan ka. Besides kung magmamahal ka dahil mahal mo lang so ok lang kahit addict, nambubugbog etc? Habang nagmamature ka maiiba pa yan definition mo ng love.

Sa nag away kayo tapos nag sex kayo kaya ganun ang effect diba dapat mas intense at passionate kasi isang way of suyo/lambing sayo un.

May kita naman pala kahit papaano kung ako yan mas gusto ko na magkasama kami para mas panatag ako na wala na sila. Pede naman tuloy nya ang business na wala sya sa bahay nun wife kasi sabi mo naman common knowledge na ayaw na nila sa isa't isa. Kung true talaga sinasabi ng bf mo pede ka naman ipakilala sa wife atleast alam ni wife kung saan lulugar kasi co parenting na lang sila.

May friend ako na may kabit ang asawa nya si friend nag wowork sa abroad un asawa nya ang pamalita sa ibang tao kaya Sila hiwalay may bf ang friend ko pero ang totoo iniwan nya friend ko at sumama sa kabit. Isang sample lang yan.

Sabi mo nga buhay mo naman yan so ok fine.

[Girltalker2]

May ka kilala rin pala yung officemate ko na nakwento nila. Halos kaka start Lang magwork nung girl and ganyan din story nila. Married yung guy 30s pero ?hiwalay? naraw. Pero 3 anak and ang bunso, few months baby palang.
So yung girl and married guy had plans din, na tuloy sila mag abroad, live in. The guy sends money home kasi kelangan daw ng mga bata while the girl spends for almost everything for the 2 of them.
Ok lang daw sa girl kasi masipag naman daw si guy maglaba and Luto. After living in for 5 years, naghiwalay din since the guy found a new gf abroad where they were based. And last I heard, married parin si Guy sa wife nya til now (not annulled) and the affair was like 10-15 yrs ago na.

[kvandenhaak]

Ako, I am just basing my opinion on the information she shared. Kung meron mang nagsabing we're not judging her, I don't think ako yun. I am judging her dahil ka-judge judge yang mga ganyan. No matter how you try paint the picture, one thing remains true and is a fact, they are very much together so she's the mistress.

Ano daw, yung mga bata na lang daw ang iniisip nila? Did I hear it right? So concerned sya sa mga bata? Hindi kaya the kids would like their parents to be together kaso merong asungot? Her excuse is that the wife is entertaining suitors kaya dapat okay lang din sila? Susme, that only proves the guy is a L-O-S-E-R! No man in his right mind will allow that, lalo na sa Pinoy culture. If he has the balls, dapat matagal hiniwalayan na nya si wife. But he can't because he knows he will need to work to fend for himself.

Ako, I am not telling her exactly what to do dahil it's so obvious she's not gonna listen to anyone. But I am telling her, shunga sya!

[lalee888]

@Alyssalicious honestly you are feeling under attack also because of the tone of your posts and how you presented yourself. And frankly, that also speaks of your level of maturity. There are mature 23 year-olds but they are the exception and not the rule.

In as much as we want not to judge you, after all our information is very limited and you did not answer most questions like does the wife know, the guy's family do they know, etc.. you brought this to yourself by opening a can of worms without being truthful or at least giving correct information.

You have already contradicted yourself and you're very HARD on the defense. None of the posters here KNOW you personally but there is a lot of concern because there are many possibilities based on the limited information we have -- you could be a gullible but knowing victim (and stoopid, honestly) or you could just be a pure vile other woman.

Whatever it might be, you are right -- it's your life, your mistakes, your pain. All we know is there is a child at stake, and another person (the wife) who may or may not know that their life is being affected.

Well, can't wait to hear an update from you, with popcorn on hand, because i'm betting my money you will be in tears in the end and you won't feel good about yourself. It will be interesting and good online entertainment for the rest of us. 

[fifi_girl]

Her excuse is that the wife is entertaining suitors kaya dapat okay lang din sila? Susme, that only proves the guy is a L-O-S-E-R! No man in his right mind will allow that, lalo na sa Pinoy culture.

Agree with this one. Walang lalaking papayag na may umaaligid sa asawa niya. Kahit pa sabihin mong may problema sila. Magseselos pa nga dapat yun dahil nakaka-move on na sa kanya ang asawa niya.

Oh well, will just grab a bag of Lay's potato chips and see what happens next.

[otra_vez]

oh well. talagang best of luck na lang alysallicious. i hope you find your happiness and peace of mind. hindi mo man aminin, subconsciously, you are asking for advice. kaya ka din nag-post dito because whether you admit it or not, you are seeking some sort of validation for what you're going through. your story has a lot of contradictions and a lot of it doesn't make sense. but i'm sure it's because hilong hilo ka na sa dami ng lies you're being fed by your bf and the fantastical narrative you've created for yourself, just so you could sleep at night.

what is it that they say? there are only two tragedies in life: one is to lose your heart's desire and the other is to gain it. the only aftermath i can see here is you guys will eventually break up. it might not be today or tomorrow or the next 2 months. but it will happen. wala akong kakilala na ang daming complications ng start ng relationship that ended in a happy life. and at the end of it all, all they have is regret. regret kasi they wasted their time and their youth on the wrong people. wag ka sana matulad sa kanila na dekada na ang inabot ng mistakes nila, panay hugot pa din sa FB at IG 

like what the others said, wag ka magpabuntis. that's the most practical tip i can give you now kasi mukhang desidido ka na namang sirain buhay mo. at the very least, wag ka mandamay ng inosenteng bata. it's bad enough you're ruining your bf's children's lives. guess you'll just have to live with that.

[lalee888]

^that's exactly what i'm reacting to,  her arrogance in the way she's defending herself. 
and i want to let her know that i will not allow a snotty little girl to reduce us to just a group of old women with nothing else better to do than delve into her life.  most have actually bit their tongues and refrained from calling her for what she is and what she's doing to a family.  at least from what i've read,  she was given sound advice and suggestions to reflect on her life.
anyway,  she did promise to post updates,  sige nga ineng,  show us up,   prove to us ikaw na ang pinaka-magaling.  hahahahaha.
back on the original topic,  i hope the OP have realized the things she did wrong, had cut all ties/communications with the ex and made amends to her family.

So true sis. I wanted to hear more from her before passing full judgment because she gave so limited information. But her tone and the way she responded, you can quickly tell she is not in a place of maturity and also doesn?t sound like she has good life skills in general.

well alyssalicious ? if I were you change your username na lang and start fresh since your username already leaves a bad taste in the mouth... change user name or not, good luck in the real world. You don?t sound equipped to handle adulting at all. At least not yet.

Plus, you have a long life ahead. Your mistakes now will haunt you and bite you back someday. As someone else posted, there?s never a happy ending from a bad beginning. History will always repeat itself. Fact.

[Girltalker2]

Kaya lang siguro nya na compare yung situation nya with TS is they fall under the same category of extra marital affair.

Yung relationship namin walang promises, no sweet talks but all realtalks. Mahirap naman talaga, kadalasan inaaway ko sya sa mga naiisip kong scenario sa utak ko na di naman totoo. Sa sitwasyon. Sa pagiging insensitive nya minsan. Sa pagiging short tempered ko. Sa pagiging pabebe.

I quote again:
<Mahirap naman talaga, kadalasan inaaway ko sya sa mga naiisip kong scenario sa utak ko na di naman totoo.>

This is women?s Instinct the victim chooses to ignore.
Tsaka for her to think it?s not true, yung lalaki din naman ang nagsasalita to convince her, nagpapaloko naman kasi.
Like any willing Mistress, natural maningil at napangakuan kasi. Pag na galit ang Mistress, , I?m sure the guy just turns the table around on how difficult it is for him blah blah blah.

This girl had this gut feel na something is wrong. Kaso naconvince ng husto na tama gawa nila and they need to execute the plan. Question lang kelan kaya matuloy? 🙄

[plumpolka]

Agree ako sissies sa way ng pag-present nya sa sarili nya. she sounded too arrogant and defensive. im sure alam nya sa sarili nya na mali sya and it's her way of trying to look strong but deep down, bibigay na yan. tulad ng isang sis natin dito, i will also bet my money on her. hahaha! not because i want to see her downfall but because she's too full of herself (from the way she wrote her response). yes it's your life and we dont care, we're just here for entertainment. if you dont want to take our unsolicited advice, then it's your choice. buhay mo naman sisirain mo, hindi samin so the hell we care di ba? we are just an opinionated adults who's "been there done that".


mas masarap magmahal ng may peace of mind at hindi ka nakukunsensya. do you think minahal lang namin guy kasi may benefit? we just love wisely because in the real world, it's not just love and lust. sabagay, men in your age are still looking for themselves, pero yung bf mong 30+ na and still haven't figured out what he wants to do this his life? hahahaha. such a loser. most men his age has already established themselves. hindi man sa family but with their careers or other aspect in life. pero sya, na-establish na nya ang pagiging babaero at loser haha.


i know the pain of loving a guy with sabit. sa akin anak lang sa labas, ano pa sayo na may asawa at 2 pa ang "aksidenteng" anak. goodluck sis! sa love life mong yan, you maybe 23 but im sure you look 40+ with the stress it gives you. enjoy! yan naman ang gusto mo e. 

[exquisitegem]

Alyssalicious,
You're a mistress and you're hanging to an affair in hopes that it will become 'right' in due time. Pero it sounds like you are already comfortable within the lie. Many of our sisses here pointed out the discrepancy of the situation. Like the husband and wife just being together for the sake of the kids, that's bull****. You cannot force someone to stay if he doesn't like to. If totoo nga yun, then he has no BALLS.
What's saddening here is that by reading your posts, it seems like to you, the affair becomes normal. The secrecy becomes normal.
You have placed yourself in a vulnerable position, very young at that. You fell in love real hard and you're making excuses for him. Update us na lang how hard it'll hit you in the end since you are not open to SOUND advice.

[nerddict]

MGA SIS! Jusmiyo. Hindi ko na binista itong thread na ito when no one was replying na and when I checked it out, BOOM! Naubos ang nilabong mani at popcorn na tinda sa plaza habang binabasa ko mga reply nyo.

Kidding aside, when GT didn't mention her age yet, akala ko mga 30's na sya. But not! We all have our moments when we acted stupid over love and for the one we love. Pero, kahit anong tumbling, kashungahan ito to the highest level? How would YOU know if the wife and your bf is not doing IT anymore? You believe his words? Girl, matanda lang ako sa'yo ng 3 years, believe me, I learned the hard way sa recent relationship ko. I believed his words despite sa mga nakakarating sa akin at sa nakita ko. Pero, one day, I just woke up telling myself na hindi ko deserve ang ginagawa nya sa akin. So that morning din, told him ayoko na na hindi nya deserve ang kagaya kong babae. Please pray. Magdasal ka. It will help you.

Tama ang mga older sissies natin dito. Isipin mo na lang na mga ate sila na concerned sa'yo. Di'ba nga ang mga tunay na kaibigan daw, sasabihin sa'yo ang katotohanan kahit gaano kasakit kasi kailangan mo yun?

Kabitan can never be justified.

[kvandenhaak]

Toroooy...LOL!

Just give us updates of what is happening and I am satisfied.

[hushush]

Crious lang ako sis.. Pano mo nakita yung pic or nalaman ang itsura ni plumpolka? 😀