Big deal pa ba ang pagiging virgin?

[luntian.hijau]

^ post away.

[purplemadness10]

I am 23 and I have a bf. But do u still consider someone a virgin if wala pang penetration pero nakaexperience na ma-finger? we make momol ng bf ko pero not to the point na may penetration. There are times na parang gusto ko na but I?m scared dahil baka hindi tolerable ang pain and parang di pa ako ready. Lol but there are times na parang i want to do it na.

[NeilRudecat]

Hi purplemadness10,

Ang pinaka-popular na meaning ng virginity sa maraming tao ay yung kung hindi pa napapasok ng ari ng lalaki ang ari ng babae.

Pero siguro may naniniwala na kapag may kahit anong sexual activity na, lalo na kung may fluid exchange (momol/kissing), at possible exposure to sexual fluids (fingering) ...ay para na ring nag-sex.  Sa panahon kasi ngayon na marami nang nahahawa ng Sexually Tranmitted Diseases at may mga types nito tulad ng Herpes, kahit sa kissing lang o fluid exposure, pwede nang mahawa at hindi na gagaling.

Sana i-develop muna ang pagiging honest sa isa't-isa.  Mahirap kung inililihim pala sa iyo na may ibang partner and BF mo at mahahawa ka ng sakit na dadalhin mo habang-buhay.

Mahirap kapag nagiging sexual ang isang relationship.  Nawawala ang focus sa mga mas importanteng bagay, tulad ng pagiging tapat at totoo.  Ang mga babae ang mas high ang risk na mahawa ng sakit o mabuntis at iwanan ng lalaki dahil sa una at huli pala hindi pa naman pala totoong love.  Na-attract lang pala, ginusto lang at nawawala ang pagkagusto o nakakahanap ng iba na may mas nakaka-higit pang mga katangian.

Sana hanggat hindi ka pinakakasalan at walang lifetime commitment sa iyo, huwag ka muna bibigay.  Marami na ang iniwan pagkatapos makuha ng lalaki ang gusto niya.

Lalaki ako at disappointed ako sa mga naging crush ko na niloko lang at iniwan lang ng BF.

[three8one]

^ +1 sayo Ser...

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regarding sa topic, yung mga nag iinarte, siguraduhin nila virgin sila bago maging big deal sa kanila ang virginity ng iba. 

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I am 23 and I have a bf. But do u still consider someone a virgin if wala pang penetration pero nakaexperience na ma-finger? we make momol ng bf ko pero not to the point na may penetration. There are times na parang gusto ko na but I?m scared dahil baka hindi tolerable ang pain and parang di pa ako ready. Lol but there are times na parang i want to do it na.

ma'am pag meron hesitation o doubt sa isip mo wag mo na muna ituloy. sigurado fail yan at may pagsisihan ka. mas maganda kung gagawin mo yan, firm at desidido ka hindi yung nadala ka lang ng sitwasyon. para wala kang "sana" sa bandang huli.

[purplemadness10]

Aww, yes. Thank you sa mga opinion nyo. As much as possible talaga gusto ko kapag kasal na. i have friends din who are into pre-marital sex and they?re telling me also na they have regrets na sana hindi pa nila binigay ganern 😂 pero yung iba kasal naman na sila ngayon hehe

[otra_vez]

is it a big deal? it is and it isn't, at the same time. it is a big deal because it's a major milestone to cross in your life. but it's also just one of the many important milestones. and to be honest, anyone who thinks it is the biggest thing they can give to their spouses or whatever, obviously has never been in a real relationship. i'll trade my husband's long lost virginity for someone who's willing to clean our bathroom, any day. 

the problem with the topic of virginity for me, especially in the Philippine context is, it becomes a question of who you're supposed to give it to. and it's especially annoying that it's a question directed at women. as someone who grew up in The Philippines, it was a real drag to have been constantly bombarded as to how women should save themselves for marriage. it's super misogynistic.

personally--and this advice goes for everyone, not just women-- i believe that only you can tell when you should start having sex. it's a very personal decision. what's important is that you start having sex on your own terms, free from the influence or pressure from anyone. and while it is ideal that you share that experience with someone you feel comfortable with, know that it's not the end of the world if it doesn't work out that way. another important thing is that you are ready for the aftermath. giving your virginity to someone is not going to make them fall in love with you or stay with you. it's not a guarantee of a happy marriage. we don't know any of that. what we do know is that we are all entitled to a healthy and satisfying sex life. sometimes that involves just one partner, sometimes it's more, a lot more. either way, as long as you're not hurting anyone, er, happy humping. or not.   

[exquisitegem]

^I couldn't agree more! 

[Azel0725]

For me as a guy, big deal saken ang virginity ng girl lalo na nung time na hnd pa ako nkatikim ng virgin. Pero nung may experience na ako at nkatikim na ng virgin eh hnd na big deal, basta ang importante saken un eh masarap at mgaling ang partner.

Pero my advice is to give your virginity to the man that you'll marry.

What if virgin pa din sya at ikaw ay hnd na, tapos gusto nya mkaexperience ng virgin, ano gagawin mo?