How much is your wedding budget? Part 7

[decibel28]

Hello linacheng I totally agree with Rory_Lorelie_Gilmore and pinkmoscato Chill ka lang and wag mo nalang isipin pa. Wag mo ng idagdag sa wedding preparation stress mo yan dahil it's not totally worth it.

In my opinion, do not disclose any wedding details or information even to your closest friends. Yes, they can help you in planning pero minsan, mahirap din na mashadong maraming naririnig na comment from other people, kasi nakaka add lang ng stress and sa mga bagay na iisipin mo. Di bale sana kung married na sila and may valuable input diba

In my case, I only disclose the nitty gritty details to my sister and to my mom. As in, alam nila lahat kung sino ang suppliers, contract price, and all that. That's because I'm based abroad and they're doing all the bank deposits for our suppliers, and of course, their input is very vital to us As for my friends naman, I don't share anything. At all! Not that I don't trust them or whatever, gusto ko yung may element of SURPRISE. All they know as of the moment is our venue and the date, of course. Pero for other stuff, wala. Kahit peg ng gown ko di nila alam hehe! Kahit budget diko sinasabi. It's not just my decision, but both our decision. I may ask a few inputs from them especially most of them are already married, pero we decided not to give much details. Kasi nga, para surprise hehe! And I always tell them na don't expect too much in our wedding, it'll be just simple and nothing extravagant, but I am assuring them that it will be organized and full of love Naks!

Pero shempre after the wedding, dun ako mag share ng experiences, feedback, and all that. Even here in GT share ko talaga lahat especially supplier feedback.

So yun lang. Think through it and pray ka lang. God bless you

[winkar22]

^ I have an opposite situation naman. Yung family namin ang umaangal sa gastos. Sinermonan pa nga ako ng younger brother ko sa presyo ng wedding gown ko na isang beses ko lang daw susuotin. My father in law is complaining na ang mahal daw ng reception venue namin. Sana daw kumuha na lang ng mura. My friends are understanding and they even push me to go book what I really want kahit na medyo pricey. Kesa naman daw may regret ako and they know that we can pull it off naman. Real time savings din kami. January 2018 wedding. And wala kaming hinihingi na tulong/pera from them. Gusto namin kami lang pero kung magbibigay sila of course we will accept. Hihi.

Reading linacheng's rant here made me realize na hindi pala ako nagiisa sa nakakaranas ng ganon. Haha! Minsan kasi parang nadadala ka sa sinasabi nila to the point na nasstress ka na. Nalulungkot ako minsan to the point na parang ayaw ko na i-push through ang wedding. Mag-civil na lang kami! Haha! Random thoughts you make kapag stress at HB. 

I will also take note of your suggestions. I'll talk to my h2b na wag na magbanggit na presyo ng suppliers to anyone especially kamag-anak nya.

[pinaydiaspora]

I feel you linacheng when we were doing our preps, but at least in this case it was your close friends. For us its our immediate families. Since gastos namin solely ni hubby yung wedding before when they learned about our budget major kontra sila. Mahirap din mag explain so from that we learned our lesson na not to say anything in details with anybody unless necessary. Mas naging smooth yung wedding preps after. Try to avoid doing that, just focus lang na all the details will be between the two of you kasi others won't really understand what you guys are going through, maiinis lang kayo.

[raiizea]

^^i feel you sis. Saken naman sa mama ko nung una kaming nagsabi na we're getting married, tapos nung nagsabi kami ng budget which is 350k nga lang yun, at ngayon nga namin nakikita na hindi pala kakayanin kung ayaw namin ng super tipid ang wedding, sabi nya ang mahal daw, sabi ko ganoong budget na talaga ngayon dahil sa nagtataasang price ng suppliers. Medyo nagulat sila kasi willing kami magipon ng ganon kalaki for just one day event. Yung sa friends ko naman alam nila na kelangan talaga namin magipon, pero yung banatan nila ko sa mga pagyaya nila ng lakad ngayon na sa susunod daw pagkasal na kami hindi na daw nila ko mayayaya, baka ang sasabihin ko na guys walang maiiwan sa anak ko eh, haha.. so talagang nakakaguilty minsan. Akala kasi nung mga hindi pa ikakasal ang mura lang magpakasal ngayon. True na sa iba mga sarili lang kasi nila ang iniisip nila, lalo na yung mga single kong friends. Kung masaya sila sa ganon, dapat naiintindihan din nila na magiging masaya ka kung paghahandaan at pagkakagastusan mo ang kasal
mo. Funny nga e, pag naman super tinipid mo yung kasal mo ang dami mong maririnig na side comments na d maganda sa mga guests mo. Minsan kasi kasama talaga yung ayaw mo makarinig ng hindi maganda, pero syempre ang importante yung talagang gusto nyo sa kasal nyo kasi nga isang araw lang yun mangyayari, itodo na. Naiisip nga namin na practice na yung wedding preps sa pagprepare sa buhay may asawa kasi hindi biro magsave ng malaking pera for wedding.

[kdramaholic]

Super agree with everything you have said mga sis! Nakakalungkot lang din minsan na during preps may mga kontrabida.. Lahat ata talaga pagdadaanan kaya dapat ready kayo emotionally kasi talagang dagdag sila sa stress. Ok talaga na not to share anything at all kahit super excited ka na isigaw sa mundo, magpigil na lang. Para din wala masabi ibang tao.. Kasi kahit tipid o hindi ang kasal may masasabi at masasabi pa din sila. Just do what makes you and your h2b happy! Kayo naman ang gagastos at nagpapakahirap sa planning eh! Basta deadma na lang sa negative vibes and focus on the planning!!! God bless sa lahat ng ikakasal!

[LilaFowler]

^ Our original budget was also 350k. Pero di talaga feasible with the airfares etc. I think almost 200k na yung catering/venue pa lang.

Yung mga nagcocomment about budget, wag mo na lang pansinin.  Kasi really, personal preference lang yan and depending on your financial capacity. Saka you can't make everyone happy.

The only thing I would not advise is going all out to the point na baon baon na sa utang or you are endangering your financial future. Dapat talaga within reason lang.

[gwyne21]

When we were preparing for our wedding a few years ago, we did not disclose the amount we spent nor the budget. Kami lang ni hubby ang gumastos sa kasal namin so we really want to have the wedding we want (na syempre pasok dapat sa budget-have to be practical din). Ayaw din namin ng mga nega or kontra comments kasi nakaka-stress talaga iyon. It can go both ways kasi. Some will encourage you to spend more (by choosing the more popular suppliers) than your budget kasi nga "minsan lang ang kasal". Others naman would say na magtipid kasi "its just a one day event". So iba-iba talaga opinion ng tao. Ako dati pag tinatanong, how much we spend/budget, ang sinasabi ko lang is that we spend base on our budget and based sa wedding and reception that we want. We dont give specific amount ni hubby. I have relatives and friends na nag-eestimate based sa naging outcome ng wedding namin (the food, venue,styling, etc)..and all the time their estimates are a lot more that we actually spend (up to 30%-50% more than actual..hehe).

[linacheng]

Thanks mga sis, reading your posts somehow makes me feel better. Ang mali ko lang talaga siguro is nashare ko yung info with them nung nagtanong sila. I will just pray nalang to God na sana everything would be fine. And I will just keep quiet nalang talaga.

[decibel28]

Hello linacheng The rest of the ladies are correct, no matter what the other people will say, what matters is that you're happy during your wedding preparation and most especially on your wedding day

You cannot please everyone, and kahit anong ganda ng wedding mo or how much you've spent, may mga comments pa din. Basta bear in mind na that's your occasion and no matter what other's will say, as long as both of you are happy, that's all that matters

[yn061515]

Thanks mga sis, reading your posts somehow makes me feel better. Ang mali ko lang talaga siguro is nashare ko yung info with them nung nagtanong sila. I will just pray nalang to God na sana everything would be fine. And I will just keep quiet nalang talaga.

I've learned this the hard way too... don't share. as in wag na lang. Let them be surprised na lang.
Hugs sis!!!

[marywater]

I agree with each and every one of your statements. Lalo na yung Don't Share Your Budget advice... Totoong totoo yan, and at some point totoong totoo when someone here in GT mentioned that planning a wedding can also be a test of friendship or your relationships with family and even H2B.

Kami lang ni H2B nakakaalam ng budget namin, and if ever it's necessary for me to get advice, I only share some of the rates of suppliers and overall budget to my OTD wedding coordinator and brides who recently graduated, yung talagang makakaintindi.

There was one time I mentioned yung rate ng wedding dress ko to a friend who got married almost a decade ago, at na-judge na ako na ang mahal raw ng dress ko (na para sakin, di naman kasi it didn't even reach 30k and for a dress nowadays, I think that is not bad). 

So hugs to all fellow brides out there. Tayo na lang magdamayan sa mga usapang budget. Ilabas na lang dito

[Rory_Lorelie_Gilmore]

^^ True, damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Gumastos ka ng malaki at magmukangg bongga, meron ka maririnig sa family/friends, magtipid ka kung ano ano nega feedbacks after the wedding makakarating sayo, so san ka nalang lulugar?

Kaya sinolo din namin 2 preps, if we sought help man sa relatives, mostly documents lang. And wala din kami pina shoulder sa maski na sino. Aside sa ayoko maka hassle, ayoko din makarinig ng kung ano pa man that will dampen my spirit. 

We can't please everybody, kaya never din ako nagshare or nagseek ng suggestions, maski pa they mean well. I'd rather talk to other b2bs like me sa forums and magresearch magisa ko. They are not in our shoes, they don't know the contents of our hearts and our thoughts, maski pa gano mo ka close, so dedma nalang. 

[tomatostellar]

Ganon talaga. may friend din ako na every time nam-mention ko na nag titipid ako for the wedding, sasabihin na "wag na splurge sa wedding, more impt ang marriage after'
Aware naman ako dun, and good for her kasi nagtipid sya ng bongga sa wedding nya - intimate ceremony and kahit kami barkada di invited.
Ganon ata talaga satin, laging nagooffer ng unsolicited advice mga tao.

[lots-o]

kami naman hindi sila nakikialam kasi kahit may wedding kami now may binabayadan kami condo sa pinas  yun lang yung ibang family pinapasoagot na samin lahat na akala nila kayang kaya namin pero sarili namin tinitipid namin like hotel and attire eh may kaya naman sila. So baka isipin nila sila tinitipid namin pero yung wedding hindi. Hay =(

[Rory_Lorelie_Gilmore]

^^ Kaumay na marinig yung "may life pa after ng wedding" from people na wala naman naitulong sa preps or sa finances, haha as if naman nakakalimutan natin yun.

Pwede bang kumalma, one at a time. 

[exquisitegem]

I can relate sis!   ang dami talaga unsolicited advice! ahaha  feeling entitled sila to give opinion. Ako nga yung officemate ko, sabi ba naman on my face "ako, ipangtatravel ko na lang o di kaya ibibili ng condo yung wedding expense. Gusto ko simple lang" ganun sya. I was like sa loob-loob ko, excuse me? We can do that kahit gagastos kami sa kasal namin, ano bang pake mo? hahaha

After our wedding, bigla na lang gusto na din nya na gumastos for the wedding, kasi daw ang saya. Iba daw pala yung experience. Hay naku! Etchoserang frog sya. hehe

[kdramaholic]

Tsaka ang pera napapag-ipunan eh ang experience at happiness kailanman hindi matutumbasan. Ang ibang bansa hindi mawawala sa mapa, ang pagpapakasal isang beses lang! Wag silang ano dyan! Kanya-kanyang trip at pangarap yan.

[Rory_Lorelie_Gilmore]

exquisitegem Hahaha, kaloka mga tactless. Halata minsan mga ka-bitter-an sa buhay. 

Yun nga exactly ang point, kasal natin to, unang una, kung di naman sila nagbigay ng pera or na-hassle sa kasal natin wag silang ano haha!

ONCE IN A LIFETIME EVENT/EXPERIENCE ITO! Galingan na. 

kdramaholic TRUE!!! Makakapagipon pa sa mga susunod na event, meron pa kamong mga tao na tipong, porke nagpakasal ka ng afford nyo eh expected you have everything figured out na  agad agad hanggang sa life insurance, medical insurance, savings, house and lot, education ng mga imaginary kids, kotse, in short secured ka na.

 Ok na ok naman yun, aba eh kung napaka yaman ba natin, why not? Pero mamressure ba? Pwede po bang magpakasal muna? Haha! 

[pinkmoscato]

hahaha! ang sarap lang sagutin ng "atleast di kami nangungutang ng pang-kasal at di rin kami umasa sa mga magulang namin so pwede naman siguro naming gawin ang gusto namin. Wag masyadong mag-worry for us, friend."

[ANJFinally]

Agree with most of the sissies here na don't ever tell to any person related to you how much you are going to spend on your wedding. Either friends or family members. Samin wala talaga kaming pinagsabihan kahit parents namin, and best friends hindi alam kasi we kept it on our own. Ayaw rin kasi namin pag umpisahan ng diskusyon or something. Kapag may nagtanong sabi lang namin lagi "Secret" hahaha! Kapag mama ko nagtanong before, sagot ko nako wag nyo ng problemahin.

Pero for me, depende kasi sa level ng pamumuhay ng tao yung reactions / opinions. If you'll share it with the person na meron naman talagang kaya sa buhay, syempre 500K-1M or more worth of wedding is okay with them, because they have it. Pero if you'll share the amount to someone na nasa mid-range lang ang income, syempre their first reaction would be sayang naman ang pera kasi para sakanila, malaki na yang ganyang amount to spend for a one day event lang. Bottom line, don't share nalang siguro to anyone the figure para iwas narin sa mga unwanted opinions like masyadong magarbo or masyadong tinipid.