I want to leave the house for good

[molybdenumstudios]

Seriously, I cannot take it anymore. So I am turning 22 and I believe that I should live on my own.

My parents kasi are still overprotective towards me. They don't even realize that I could venture on my own. They don't trust me when I am alone without their parental guidance. That's why I am here stuck in a limbo. Ang gulo ko ngang kausap but they still care about their ego over me.

[FayeP]

sis, by all means go ahead....

since 22 ka naman, it's the high time to be independent, go get a place of your own..


pero bakit naman naisip mo ngayon?

[j.adore]

Not much background so how can we help?

[mooncake and leaves]

Do it. You're young enough to recover your losses should it not work out for you. But make sure you can still save a bit. And don't leave on bad terms with your parents. Tandaan: if your parents are not treating you like an adult, it's likely that it's because you're not acting like one. So go and be independent. But be kind about it and think it through.

[17glut]

Seriously, I cannot take it anymore. So I am turning 22 and I believe that I should live on my own.

My parents kasi are still overprotective towards me. They don't even realize that I could venture on my own. They don't trust me when I am alone without their parental guidance. That's why I am here stuck in a limbo. Ang gulo ko ngang kausap but they still care about their ego over me.

you're just turning 22 and you want to leave your house na?  wow, kids these days... oh, well, kung ano man ang trip don't let us stop you...

[bagaholic_chewy]

TS, if you feel na kaya mo na magsarili then go ahead. Basta pag-isipang mabuti. Wag padalos-dalos just because feeling mo nasasakal ka.

And remember that leaving your parents' home also means you should be willing to leave the "perks" of being under their wing - like free board and lodging, the services of helpers if applicable (to clean-up, do laundry, iron your clothes, change your sheets, cook your food), etc etc.

And if you decide to leave, be in good terms with your parents. Let them know your reasons why you wanted to try living independently. Be mature about it. Don't cut ties "for good", sige ka, baka wala kang balikan if things don't work out.

[molybdenumstudios]

And if you decide to leave, be in good terms with your parents. Let them know your reasons why you wanted to try living independently. Be mature about it. Don't cut ties "for good", sige ka, baka wala kang balikan if things don't work out.

Well, kahit sabihin kong gusto kong maging independent, I won't ever dare to cut ties with them.

[nixmusic]

I say go ahead and be independent pero let your parents know where you'll be staying (and make sure that it's safe). I did this when I was 19, I was a working student back then and I proved to them na kaya ko gumraduate on time on my own. I'm so glad I did because after that sobrang laki na ng tiwala nila sa akin and it made me a mature young lady. Mahirap lang sa simula but it's liberating and the things you'll learn will take you places. Syempre be responsible, ang labo naman kung umalis ka nga pero humihingi ka pa ng allowance.

[ycel0612]

every working adult should do this imo. yes at the start you can barely save with that set up pero the experience, the lessons you will learn, the life skills you'll acquire will definitely be worth it. i think this is the only way to prove your parents that you are not baby anymore. minsan kasi kahit nag work ka na, basta may expenses ka pa rin na subsidized ng parents mo, bata pa rin tingin nila sayo go ka lang basta explain mo sa kanila ng maayos and be firm with your decision.

[ikaela]

Chiming in with everyone else: do it.

I left the house around that age too and it was the best decision I ever made. It forced me to grow up, appreciate my parents more, which led to a better relationship with my parents.

[sugar n spice]

There's nothing wrong in living on your own. Independency makes you more mature and smart sa buhay.

But what do you mean by

Ang gulo ko ngang kausap but they still care about their ego over me.

Meron ka bang gusto na hindi nila pagbigyan?

[WorriedB2B]

hehe, I also have over protective parents. Kahit ngayon na may asawa na ko, over protective pa din sila, na dumating na sa point na parang gusto nila kami paghiwalayin. Before I get married, inamin naman nila na sa aming 3 na magkakapatid, ako lang daw yung naging independent and matured kahit nasa poder nila. I feel for you. Nakakasakal, oo. Pero you have to show them na independent ka without breaking the ties. dadating talaga sa point na gusto mo tumakas at bumukod. pero you can also show them na kaya mo maging independent kahit nasa poder ka nila. Pero if hindi mo na talaga kaya, go ahead. Wag na wag ka lang gagawa ng bagay na in the end, sasabihin nila sayo na "i told you so".

[molybdenumstudios]

Thanks for the advice, sissies. Yung gusto ko na hindi nila binigay sa akin, those are the things na talagang tinitipid nila. I don't want to keep a complacent mentality with me. I'd rather take the risk of living on my own.

Ngayon, I am doing my job seriously (currently taking diploma in professional photography) to make photog as a serious career.

[17glut]

^taking photography as a career? wow, you sure are serious about it - kahit ako nung ginawa kong freelance career ang photography it took me a while before i was able to make a decent earning from it.

Going back to topic, walang masama if you decide to become independent, maganda pa nga yan maaga pa lang masasanay ka na sa buhay, ang importante lang naman kasi is marunong ka sa mga basics like managing your finances, effective time management at syempre doing house chores all on your own. Basta nasanay ka na sa ganun kahit san mo pa ilagay sarili mo makaka-survive ka na.

Also make sure na napa-intindi mo ng maigi sa parents mo yung plano mo hindi yung basta ka na lang mag-tantrums at sabay walk-out kasi magulang mo pa din mga yun. Whatever your plans are in life, do not burn bridges with your parents - you may not realize it yet pero when the time comes you will need them and they will need you too. Tandaan, hindi immortal ang mga magulang natin.

[mooncake and leaves]

Wait, I don't get it. So may mga bagay na youre asking them to pay for and hindi nila binibigay or tinitipid nila. And your solution is to move out?

If right now that you're not paying rent pero you're still financially dependent on your parents for some of the things you need/want, what exactly do you think will happen if you have to pay rent, food, utilities, etc? I'm just curious. I still believe you should move out. I just wish you have a solid plan.

[KVsWahmmy]

sis molybdenumstudios: I started living independently a few months after I got my first job. It was liberating....at first. Hehe. Ang sarap ng walang nakatutok sa yo maghapon magdamag. My parents, especially my mom, was overprotective too, so somehow I felt 'free' when I was no longer under their wings. I was paying for rent, utilities, bills, everything - and though that part was not exactly fun, it felt good to be able to handle financials on my own. No one breathing on my neck complaining about how I spend or where I go or what I do. BUT, it's not easy. I had to suffer a lot of consequences of my independent (but wrong) decisions. I learned from them though, so may benefit din kahit papano. Nakakamiss din yung paggising mo may pagkain na. Pag may sakit ka may magaalaga sayo. Pag wala ka na pera may magbibigay sayo. Pag bored or depressed ka may kakausapin ka. I had friends sure, but living alone is well...living alone. Going home to an empty house isn't as fun as going home to a place where you have loving arms to welcome you In short, it's complicated.

The benefit I got from doing it? I LEARNED the hard way sometimes - but it made me stronger, it made me more responsible, it made me love and appreciate my parents more too - and I see both sides clearly now that I am a parent myself.

Two pieces of advice I can give you sis, based on my own experience, is 1. Leave for the right reasons 2. Panindigan mong mabuti ang desisyon mo.

 

[Girltalker2]

They don't trust me when I am alone without their parental guidance. That's why I am here stuck in a limbo. Ang gulo ko ngang kausap but they still care about their ego over me.

Would you have an idea why they don't trust you? May mga nagawa ka ba or ginagawa that they think is irresponsible for an adult?

I just think your parents won't hover around you if they can feel at ease when you're aline. Mukhang they cannot have that peace of mind if you live your life without them, that's why kahit 22yo ka Na, they can't help but monitor you and try to guide/influence every decision you make.

[molybdenumstudios]

Thanks sissies for the advice. I'm thinking of moving out na talaga. I don't want self-important people to interfere and meddle with my life decisions. Para sa akin, being in the house caused me more bad than good.

[hypergalactix13]

sis, sometimes our parents have their own reasons why they cannot let go of their children. hindi dahil sa wala silang tiwala sa'yo, but whether we admit it or not they still know what's best for us. alam ng parents natin kung kaya na natin magsarili o hindi pa since they also went through the same state. and yes, they really should know better kasi lumaki ka under their supervision and care.

chill ka lang sis, it sounds like you're just being rebellious dahil hindi mo nagagawa 'yung gusto mo. pag-isipan mong mabuti, moving out and living on your own is really a big step. if your only reason is to have a bit more of freedom, then think twice. living alone is far more difficult than you think.

[17glut]

Ts, make sure kaya mong panindigan ang desisyon mo hindi yung pag kumalam ang sikmura mo or maubos cash mo eh gagapang ka pabalik sa puder ng mga magulang mo. Let us all be realistic na lang for one sec, kung ang mga may trabaho nga hirap mamuhay ng solo eh pano pa kaya ang tulad mo na 22 yrs old pa lang at nag aaral pa?

Picture this, yung career path mo pa eh photography, yung kikitain mo sa ganyan lalo na pag nagsisimula ka pa lang eh barya lang so sa tingin mo ba sapat na yun pambayad sa mga kakailanganin mo pag nagsolo ka na? buti sana kung saksakan ka ng galing pumitik pati retouching eh na-master mo na, malaki ang client base at sunod sunod ang paid assignments mo, dun siguro makakapag ipon ka kagad para magawa mo trip mo pero from where you're at right now I'm sure pagsisisihan mo lang desisyon mo the moment you leave your parents.

My advice? stop acting like a brat and act your age.