Re: Got questions regarding men? Post it here! (Thread 5)

[Girltalker2]

Hi po. May tanong lang po. Ano po ibig sabihin kapag nagppicture taking e yung guy inaakbayan si girl? Yung kamay sa balikat? Ibig sabihin po ba nun gusto ni guy si girl or friendly lang yun?
Salamat.

Para sakin, kung ako yung girl, masasapak ko sya!   

Kidding aside, mga lalaking ganyan feeling ko nananyansing lang.  Di mo masabi kung type ka nya o hindi, or puedeng type nya ang buong bayan kaya nya inaakbayan.

Recently my ex texted me, nangamusta and all. We had a bad break up, matinding sagutan inabot namin. Then after a few months, nagkamustahan kami. I asked for forgiveness and sabi ko gusto ko ng maayos na closure. At first he keeps on giving excuses. Then finally after sometime, bigla nya sakin sinabi, "hindi pa kasi ako ready".

Medyo nalalabuan kasi ako, what does it mean when he says that he's not ready? Not ready for closure?

Malabo lang sya kausap, that's all hehe

Hindi lang sya ready makipag usap.  Sakin lang, if I am in your shoes, ang sasabihin ko lang naman na - officially wala na tayo so wishing you good luck. Ganun lang kasimple. I am not sure also ano ibig mong sabihin when you say closure.  Bakit kelangan pa mag usap?

@natlevi

I won't give it any meaning kasi ako kapag nagpapa picture sa babae either nakaakbay ako or malapit talaga, kasi any other way is awkward talaga..search mo sa google images ang 'hovering hand' and tell me na hindi mukhang loser yung guy sa pics. kahit yung tipong naka lean yung upper body pero naiiwan yung lower body, reeks so much of 'beta' body language. tingnan mo mga artista kapag nagpapapicture ang fan na babae, nakaakbay sila pero hindi mo naman iisipin na may gusto sila sa girl diba, same logic din lang

Iba naman kasi pag artista.  Pero pag ka officemate or friends lang, parang hindi proper.

^ sis natlevi, baka sila na hindi mo lang alam.

[jtansanco]

Recently my ex texted me, nangamusta and all. We had a bad break up, matinding sagutan inabot namin. Then after a few months, nagkamustahan kami. I asked for forgiveness and sabi ko gusto ko ng maayos na closure. At first he keeps on giving excuses. Then finally after sometime, bigla nya sakin sinabi, "hindi pa kasi ako ready".

Medyo nalalabuan kasi ako, what does it mean when he says that he's not ready? Not ready for closure?

As mentioned above, he's already your ex. It's already done. I'm guessing you're the one who broke up with him. It's just normal that he's "not yet ready" because he still has feelings for you while you don't. If you're over him, just leave him alone. A "formal" closure will be a form of torture for him.

[sacred cow]

@girltalker

you missed the point, kelangan kasi bago mo akbayan yung girl. ang tingin niya sa'yo hindi creepy guy, if your image in the office is this fun, cool guy and that ganun ka lang talaga sa mga babae and you don't feel awkward about it, then they won't feel awkward about it. obviously sa case nung ex ni natlevi e comfortable yung babae na magpaakbay sa kanya. by him also having pics like these, mapapaisip yung mga girls na may gusto sakanya (like natlevi) if he and the the girl in the picture is going out or just close friends, o diba apektado si girl and tumaas yung attraction para kay ex kasi wish nya sya yung inaakbayan.
last, piliin mo rin ang mga girls na aakbayan mo..in my experience the pretty girls are ok with it (kasi sanay sila and alam nilang wala yun) tapos yung mga di kagandahan pa yung maarte and make a big deal out of it. wag din kasi akbay manyak or parang pinapakita mo na you own the girl. dapat gentleman lang and remove it agad after having your picture taken

[baliwsayo]

Based on experience, gwapo guys don't make tsansing este akbay hehe.. mga average to chaka guys lang nagawa nun. 

Well, generally, hindi okey sa girls magpaakbay kung di naman boyfriend (kahit bestfriend ko pa hindi rin okey.. though pogi din kasi bestfriend ko kaya di naman din niya ako inaakbayan).. hindi na lang nagrereklamo kasi waste of time.. pero ako, tinatandaan ko yung nang-aakbay at next time di ko na lang tinatabihan pag picture-taking na.   

[simang]

Hi po. May tanong lang po. Ano po ibig sabihin kapag nagppicture taking e yung guy inaakbayan si girl? Yung kamay sa balikat? Ibig sabihin po ba nun gusto ni guy si girl or friendly lang yun?
Salamat.

May nakita kasi akong pic ng ex ko e tapos naka-akbay sya dun sa girl. Group pic naman po pero hindi ko mapigilang masaktan. Alam kong wala naman na ko karapatan pero hindi talaga maiwasan. Friends kami bago maging kami talaga pero hindi sya ganun saken, ramdam ko na naiilang syang akbayan ako kapag magpapapicture kami.

Wala lang yun. Mas awkward kaya pag walang contact pag nagpapicture. Also, even if it has some meaning, why are you stressing about it? Di mapigilan masaktan, pero tama ka, wala ka na karapatan. An ex is an ex just let him have his life. When things go sour between you two, you do know you're risking losing the friendship too, right?

Mas strong indication ba na may gusto ang isang lalaki kapag medyo nahihiya sya kaysa dun sa hindi naiilang at ma-touchy?

So are you trying to justify your thinking na his akbay is not indicating anything? And that his awkwardness towards you is the authentic sign that he likes a girl? Just stop thinking about it, wala ka naman mapapala kakaisip nyan. Una sa lahat, if he likes the girl or not, you will never know naman eh. Secondly, if you do find out that he likes the girl, what do you do? Pipigilan mo ba? Makikipagbalikan ba sya sayo? Just stop stressing over it.

[simang]

Based on experience, gwapo guys don't make tsansing este akbay hehe.. mga average to chaka guys lang nagawa nun. 

Well, generally, hindi okey sa girls magpaakbay kung di naman boyfriend (kahit bestfriend ko pa hindi rin okey.. though pogi din kasi bestfriend ko kaya di naman din niya ako inaakbayan).. hindi na lang nagrereklamo kasi waste of time.. pero ako, tinatandaan ko yung nang-aakbay at next time di ko na lang tinatabihan pag picture-taking na.   

Ahahaha. Ako naman sanay ako maakbayan ng guy friends ko. Ma-hug din kame. I used to be so awkward about it naalala ko nung 1st yr college ako i made a letter to my gay BFF na wag nya ko masyado akbayan and wag sya masyado touchy saken kase i dont feel comfortable haha. Pero eventually nasanay na din ako, and i guess a 'tsansing' is a 'tsansing' only if the girl gives meaning to it.

Sabi nga nung taxi driver na nakausap ko before, pag type ka ng babae, kahit sunggaban mo hindi yan magsasalita. pero pag di ka type, hawakan mo lang dulo ng buhok irereklamo ka na sa barangay.

[sacred cow]

if a girl give so much meaning to a simple akbay, she's got more issues than you think. I wouldn't waste my time on her kahit gano pa kaganda 'yan

[sacred cow]

^agree din ako dun sa sinabi nung taxi driver

[jtansanco]

@Akbay question/answers - I just find it funny na big issue pala yang akbay na yan. Here, it's pretty common. I think that the question should be "What if nakaakbay sa waist yung guy?". But then again, it's normal practice here while taking a picture. I guess it really does depend on the culture.

[j.adore]

Is it possible for a guy to be really loyal to one woman if he's so into women? As in mahilig sa maganda sexy etc and takes every opportunity to have fun.

I'm worried for my friend who is also engaged. Told him make sure he's done with games and focus on his future wife.
Sabi niya di daw siya sure what will happen in the future. So medyo sumakit ulo ko why he wants to get married if he's not determined to be faithful

[natlevi]

Wala lang yun. Mas awkward kaya pag walang contact pag nagpapicture. Also, even if it has some meaning, why are you stressing about it? Di mapigilan masaktan, pero tama ka, wala ka na karapatan. An ex is an ex just let him have his life. When things go sour between you two, you do know you're risking losing the friendship too, right?

So are you trying to justify your thinking na his akbay is not indicating anything? And that his awkwardness towards you is the authentic sign that he likes a girl? Just stop thinking about it, wala ka naman mapapala kakaisip nyan. Una sa lahat, if he likes the girl or not, you will never know naman eh. Secondly, if you do find out that he likes the girl, what do you do? Pipigilan mo ba? Makikipagbalikan ba sya sayo? Just stop stressing over it.

You are right. Salamat. Akala ko kasi ok na ko e pero nung may nakita ko na ganun medyo may sakit pa pala. 

[jtansanco]

^^ Yeah, that's possible. Who doesn't want to settle down? Every guy is attracted to the types of girls you mentioned but hanggang tingin nalang yun. He'll still have his "player" instincts because you can't just turn it off in an instant. But the moment that he realizes that he has that piece of jewelry on his left ring finger AKA "the ring", he "should" behave. And for the women, I'm sure if they see that ring, they "will" back off.

Yup I'm the one who broke up with him. At first sya yung humihingi ng closure, then nung pumayag na ako, bigla na lang na ganun sinabi nya. Gusto ko lang din sana sya makausap ng maayos or kahit formal closure kasi I can sense his bitterness pag nakakatext ko sya.

He initially wants closure to see how you'd react. Now, if you'll actually meet, I doubt you'll talk about closure. I'm positive that the opposite will happen. Instead of closure, he'll try to woo you back.

[xxcheiyexx]

Question. If a guy invites a girl he's dating sa house/room nya, may hidden agenda ba sya?

 I have been dating this guy for almost 2 months na and I'm starting to like him na. We cuddle but we havent kissed yet, he tried pero umiwas ako. Ngayon he sent me a list of movies we can watch (wholesome movies naman, mga related to being successful). He suggested his place or my place. Honestly ako ayaw ko pa sya dalhin sa bahay kasi ayoko magtanong parents ko. Haha that leaves us hisroom, he's staying sa boarding house kasi. And sabi ko medyo hindi ako comfortable, bukod sa andun din officemates namin, baka we might not be able to control ourselves if ever..

[j.adore]

I hope so nga since he's had a history of not just tingin.

[jtansanco]

^^ LOL! Looks like you're the one who has a hidden agenda.. But anyway, whatever his "plans" are, it will depend on how you'll react. It doesn't matter what he does. It only matters how you'll respond to his actions unless of course serial killer yang guy na yan... Delikado ka.. Haha

[young_maiden]

What do guys think of girls na nakakasakay sa mga green jokes o nakakabanat ng mga green jokes? Turn on or turn off?

[jtansanco]

^ Turn on of course since there's no awkward feeling.

[Girltalker2]

last, piliin mo rin ang mga girls na aakbayan mo..

Bakit kelangan piliin?  So ibig sabihin may intent yung guy.

Para sakin, kahit  may malice o wala, respect nalang sa partner/pamilya ng isa't isa.  gugustuhin mo ba makita ang GF/wife/mom/sis mo inaakbayan lang ng sino sinong lalaki?  in the same way, matutuwa ba ang GF /wife mo kung lahat ng babae ay inaakbayan mo na para kang artista. Siguro artista, exception nalang yun, kasi kelangan naman talaga nila yun sa job.

in my experience the pretty girls are ok with it (kasi sanay sila and alam nilang wala yun) tapos yung mga di kagandahan pa yung maarte and make a big deal out of it. wag din kasi akbay manyak or parang pinapakita mo na you own the girl. dapat gentleman lang and remove it agad after having your picture taken

Actually, wala sa itsura yun. Marami naman ako nakikita at wala sa itsura, minsan nga nakakalito di mo alam sino ang mag GF/BF.  And I must say iyan ang root cause of all infidelities sa office eh. Once people start getting close with the opposite gender, dito nag uumpisa nagm make ng advances either party. Syempre hindi lahat, pero puede iyan pag umpisahan eh.

Hindi gentlemanly ang pag akbay. At least sa pov ko.  Pero sabi nga ni jtansanco, depende nanga din siguro sa culture at siguro sa kinalakihan ng mga tao. 

And also, being "cool" does not always mean akbayan mo lahat ng tao sa barangay or magpakaakbay ka kahit kanino otherwise you will be treated as an outcast. This. Ito ang nagbubuyo sa mga tao (at least sa nakikita ko na magka officemates) na magkaron ng extra affairs, kahit pa may asawa na yung isa.

[sacred cow]

^ what I meant by piliin is kung sa tingin mo hindi comfortable si girl/ may asawa/ feelingera si girl..wag mo na akbayan. if she's cowboy at para lang naman sa picture, put your arm on her just for a while then tanggal agad after taking the pic. bahala na kayo pano intindihin sinasabi ko, baka mas prefer niyo 'hovering hand' sa pics..then so be it.

[simang]

^ what I meant by piliin is kung sa tingin mo hindi comfortable si girl/ may asawa/ feelingera si girl..wag mo na akbayan. if she's cowboy at para lang naman sa picture, put your arm on her just for a while then tanggal agad after taking the pic. bahala na kayo pano intindihin sinasabi ko, baka mas prefer niyo 'hovering hand' sa pics..then so be it.

more on the feelingera, ahahaha wag na lang lapitan at all. hehe

again, a physical gesture will only mean something if the girl gives it meaning