feel so down,, pakiramdam ko mas pinipili nya kabit nya,,

[toydoll]

Hello sisses,, thanks thanks thanks for all your thoughts again...

to date, there's consistency with his actions... cp still out, updating me on his whereabouts, sweetness and all,,, the qestion left is --- hanggang kelan??

naiisip ko tuloy,, kung si girl ang umiwas na at lumayo,, di sana magkakaron kami ng sobra sobrang damage kung at once lumayo ang girl at umiwas agad,, i thinks this is #5 sa enumeration ni sis bonita,,

sis langley, thanks for your post, na overlook ko ito at ngayon ko lang nabasa,, nangako sya ulit sakin na wala na syang gagawin para masira ang pamilya namin,,, yun ang sabi nya,, just last last night again while driving home pauwi na kami,, oo sis, lagi naman umuuwi si hubby,, yung mga days na di sya umuwi, yung yung mga days na hindi ko sya tinatanggap,, yung mga days na pinalayas ko sya,,,

i am praying na sana magtuloy tuloy na yung peace and harmony sa amin,, sana nga narealize na nya mga mali nya sa akin pati sa mga anak nya,,,

mahirap lang talaga mag umpisa ulit,, but i will try my best to make this work this time,, yung mga di ko pa nagagawa para sa kanya before, i will... sa ganitong pagkakataon talaga natin na rerealize mga pagkukulang natin,, pero sana sya din,,,

sis cutemama, nasan na yung ex wife ni boylet ng friend mo? nakakaawa yung iniwan nya,, at di talaga nakunsensya yung friend mo? hayyy,,, ano yun love? kasi ang love is respect, love is not selfish,,, so love ba ang tawag sa kung anong meron sila? kahit anong mangyari may nasaktan pa din sila, may naapakan pa din sila,, so how come masaya sila? hayyy,, anyway,, may mga taong lang talagang nakakayanan maging masaya kahit alam nilang may nasasaktan sila,,, they are really the pathetic ones, kasi ang se selfish nila,, sobra,,,,

[langley]

^Ganyan talaga ang buhay may asawa sis, mahirap. Madaming pagsubok na dadaanan. Always remember na hindi na kayo dalawa ng asawa mo. You are one. Kaya pag down ang asawa mo, down ka din. Pag nasa taas siya, nasa taas ka din. Pag talo siya, talo ka din. Kaya love your husband like you love yourselves. Treat him like a king.

Sabi nga sa Bibile
"She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life" - Proverbs 31:12

Wag mo na intindihin 'yung other woman. Ang intindihan mo yung pagsasama nyo ng asawa mo.
Paano ka ba magiging blessing sa asawa mo? At wag ka maghahanap ng kapalit sa ginagawa mo. Wag kang manunumbat sa kabutihan na ginagawa mo sa asawa mo. At wag ka din susuko. If there are days na maalala mo yun ginawa ng asawa mo. Get on your knees and pray to God na alisin ang bitterness sa puso mo. Then continue doing good. Continue serving your husband. And eventually your feelings will follow.

You know what I learn from marriage? Unconditional love and respect. And giving, yung hindi naghahanap ng kapalit at hindi nagbibilang.

[bonita111809]

Hello sisses,, thanks thanks thanks for all your thoughts again...

to date, there's consistency with his actions... cp still out, updating me on his whereabouts, sweetness and all,,, the qestion left is --- hanggang kelan??

naiisip ko tuloy,, kung si girl ang umiwas na at lumayo,, di sana magkakaron kami ng sobra sobrang damage kung at once lumayo ang girl at umiwas agad,, i thinks this is #5 sa enumeration ni sis bonita,,

sis langley, thanks for your post, na overlook ko ito at ngayon ko lang nabasa,, nangako sya ulit sakin na wala na syang gagawin para masira ang pamilya namin,,, yun ang sabi nya,, just last last night again while driving home pauwi na kami,, oo sis, lagi naman umuuwi si hubby,, yung mga days na di sya umuwi, yung yung mga days na hindi ko sya tinatanggap,, yung mga days na pinalayas ko sya,,,

i am praying na sana magtuloy tuloy na yung peace and harmony sa amin,, sana nga narealize na nya mga mali nya sa akin pati sa mga anak nya,,,

mahirap lang talaga mag umpisa ulit,, but i will try my best to make this work this time,, yung mga di ko pa nagagawa para sa kanya before, i will... sa ganitong pagkakataon talaga natin na rerealize mga pagkukulang natin,, pero sana sya din,,,

sis cutemama, nasan na yung ex wife ni boylet ng friend mo? nakakaawa yung iniwan nya,, at di talaga nakunsensya yung friend mo? hayyy,,, ano yun love? kasi ang love is respect, love is not selfish,,, so love ba ang tawag sa kung anong meron sila? kahit anong mangyari may nasaktan pa din sila, may naapakan pa din sila,, so how come masaya sila? hayyy,, anyway,, may mga taong lang talagang nakakayanan maging masaya kahit alam nilang may nasasaktan sila,,, they are really the pathetic ones, kasi ang se selfish nila,, sobra,,,,

sis, it's good to know that you acknowledge your shortcomings. wag ka na magtanong kung hanggang kelan yan yan. at lalong wag mong itatanong sa kanya. he's moving on now. just be the better wife and you will keep him in his sanity.

a woman can make or break a man sissy. totoo yan. kaya maging mabuting asawa ka lang. trust him with all your heart and accept him for who he is. always, always look at his good side. put a blind eye on the bad traits and don't ever try to change him.

wag kang magtatamang hinala. nasasakal sila sa ganyan. shower him with admiration. kelangan na kelangan ng lalake yan, it's his number 1 need. do not wound his ego. ito ang maglalagay ng gap sa inyong dalawa.

tell him this while looking in his eyes:

" (term of endearment), I now know what went wrong between us and I am so sorry. I have been blind for a long time of how good you are as a person and as a husband. I'm so sorry. Please know that I appreciate everything that you do for the family. I am proud of you and I admire you for being the strong man that you are. I love you so much."

kung hindi ka masyadong expressive mejo mahirap yan pero it will give you best results. then observe him in the next few days kung anong gagawin nya and let us know. excited ako para sayo. you're now both walking in the path of renewal and forever joy. good luck! ^_^

[bonita111809]

^Ganyan talaga ang buhay may asawa sis, mahirap. Madaming pagsubok na dadaanan. Always remember na hindi na kayo dalawa ng asawa mo. You are one. Kaya pag down ang asawa mo, down ka din. Pag nasa taas siya, nasa taas ka din. Pag talo siya, talo ka din. Kaya love your husband like you love yourselves. Treat him like a king.

Sabi nga sa Bibile
"She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life" - Proverbs 31:12

Wag mo na intindihin 'yung other woman. Ang intindihan mo yung pagsasama nyo ng asawa mo.
Paano ka ba magiging blessing sa asawa mo? At wag ka maghahanap ng kapalit sa ginagawa mo. Wag kang manunumbat sa kabutihan na ginagawa mo sa asawa mo. At wag ka din susuko. If there are days na maalala mo yun ginawa ng asawa mo. Get on your knees and pray to God na alisin ang bitterness sa puso mo. Then continue doing good. Continue serving your husband. And eventually your feelings will follow.

You know what I learn from marriage? Unconditional love and respect. And giving, yung hindi naghahanap ng kapalit at hindi nagbibilang.

very well said sis.

[Girltalker2]

i am praying na sana magtuloy tuloy na yung peace and harmony sa amin,, sana nga narealize na nya mga mali nya sa akin pati sa mga anak nya,,,

Sis, continue praying.  Sana sa case mo, pakinggan ka nya.

mahirap lang talaga mag umpisa ulit,, but i will try my best to make this work this time,, yung mga di ko pa nagagawa para sa kanya before, i will... sa ganitong pagkakataon talaga natin na rerealize mga pagkukulang natin,, pero sana sya din,,,

It takes two to tango.  Pareho kayo kelangan mag effort to rebuild your relationship.  Why don't you guys consider counseling narin?

^Ganyan talaga ang buhay may asawa sis, mahirap. Madaming pagsubok na dadaanan.

But infidelity shouldn't be the norm. 

Wag mo na intindihin 'yung other woman. Ang intindihan mo yung pagsasama nyo ng asawa mo.
Paano ka ba magiging blessing sa asawa mo? At wag ka maghahanap ng kapalit sa ginagawa mo. Wag kang manunumbat sa kabutihan na ginagawa mo sa asawa mo. At wag ka din susuko. If there are days na maalala mo yun ginawa ng asawa mo. Get on your knees and pray to God na alisin ang bitterness sa puso mo. Then continue doing good. Continue serving your husband. And eventually your feelings will follow.

This can only work if the cheater stopped na and nagsorry na talaga. In the case of TS, mukhang sincere nga naman ang asawa nya, so she is giving their marriage another chance.  Otherwise, it is a torturous process na papatayin mo lang ang sarili mong dignidad.

You know what I learn from marriage? Unconditional love and respect. And giving, yung hindi naghahanap ng kapalit at hindi nagbibilang.

Hindi sa paghahanap ng kapalit, but marriage is a partnership of two people.  You can give all you want, pero kung yung isang party walang pakialam at sige parin ang pambababae, there is no respect in that kind of marriage. And it is better to end it than tolerate such kind of "unconditional love".

So I guess bottomline, 2 kayo kelangan mag cooperate. If one lang, it will never work as the giving/cheated party will always be miserable all his/her life.

[honeycrushed]

Sis, i was once in your shoes and may not be completely out of it yet dahil minumulto pa ko at times.  Like you, i doubt what my husband says, like kung may sabihin syang promise, i would always think, totoo kaya... Or if he leaves his cellphone about, iisipin ko, hmmm parang wala na or baka naman he just changed the name of the girl with one of his male friends' name. My husband left me for his kabitch, literally. After 3 months or so, he came back home.

I agree with sis bonita, if you're husband is moving on, then move on too. don't bring up the times that he has been weak - even during the times na binabagyo ka ng doubts at narerefresh sa isip mo yung babae. it's difficult to do, it's a challenge, but if you are giving your relationship a chance, then you have to keep yourself together and overcome the doubts. keep on praying na bigyan ka ng peace of mind.

My husband told me he left because of me.  He feels so little kasi napamukha ko sa aming lahat na tama ako, na weak sya at hindi nya kayang lumaban sa temptation.  And I agree, I am domineering at times and always wanted to prove my point.  So what I did, I tried to change that.  I tried to change not for him, but for me.  Dahil nakakapagod maging dudera at controlling. 

Don't get me wrong, hindi ako nagpapaka plastic.  I still get mad, but not the same way.  I say my point matter-of-factly.  When I get hurt with what he did, I let him know. Pagkatapos kong masabi, tapos na, hindi ko na uulit ulitin pa. I am still the same person with the same strong personality.  But I can shut up.  Even during the times na gustong gusto ko ng mag-nag dahil nag dududa ko, I just take a deep breath and pray for peace of mind.  Ang iniisip ko, I cannot control everything.  If mag sisinungaling at lulusot, gagawa ng paraan yan, so why stress myself with that? BUT, may ultimatum ako sa sarili ko: If I catch him red-handed, then I will leave. No timelines.  You know kung kailan ka puno na at kung kailan kaya mo pa. 

I am not as conservative as others.  Ang akin, I will do my part, I will play the wife.  It's up to you if you do yours.  If we both change to complement each other, then good, our relationship is on the path to restoration.  Pero if ikaw na lang ng ikaw ang nagbibigay, mag-isip ka rin.  Know when you are being abused.  Love yourself. I agree with sis girltaker2.  It's a two-way street, he should work for your relationship din.     

   

[simang]

^relate ako sa reply mo sis, i feel like that's what i'll do if the same thing happens to me. 

[bonita111809]

Sis, i was once in your shoes and may not be completely out of it yet dahil minumulto pa ko at times.  Like you, i doubt what my husband says, like kung may sabihin syang promise, i would always think, totoo kaya... Or if he leaves his cellphone about, iisipin ko, hmmm parang wala na or baka naman he just changed the name of the girl with one of his male friends' name. My husband left me for his kabitch, literally. After 3 months or so, he came back home.

I agree with sis bonita, if you're husband is moving on, then move on too. don't bring up the times that he has been weak - even during the times na binabagyo ka ng doubts at narerefresh sa isip mo yung babae. it's difficult to do, it's a challenge, but if you are giving your relationship a chance, then you have to keep yourself together and overcome the doubts. keep on praying na bigyan ka ng peace of mind.

My husband told me he left because of me.  He feels so little kasi napamukha ko sa aming lahat na tama ako, na weak sya at hindi nya kayang lumaban sa temptation.  And I agree, I am domineering at times and always wanted to prove my point.  So what I did, I tried to change that.  I tried to change not for him, but for me.  Dahil nakakapagod maging dudera at controlling. 

Don't get me wrong, hindi ako nagpapaka plastic.  I still get mad, but not the same way.  I say my point matter-of-factly.  When I get hurt with what he did, I let him know. Pagkatapos kong masabi, tapos na, hindi ko na uulit ulitin pa. I am still the same person with the same strong personality.  But I can shut up.  Even during the times na gustong gusto ko ng mag-nag dahil nag dududa ko, I just take a deep breath and pray for peace of mind.  Ang iniisip ko, I cannot control everything.  If mag sisinungaling at lulusot, gagawa ng paraan yan, so why stress myself with that? BUT, may ultimatum ako sa sarili ko: If I catch him red-handed, then I will leave. No timelines.  You know kung kailan ka puno na at kung kailan kaya mo pa. 

I am not as conservative as others.  Ang akin, I will do my part, I will play the wife.  It's up to you if you do yours.  If we both change to complement each other, then good, our relationship is on the path to restoration.  Pero if ikaw na lang ng ikaw ang nagbibigay, mag-isip ka rin.  Know when you are being abused.  Love yourself. I agree with sis girltaker2.  It's a two-way street, he should work for your relationship din.     

   

sis honeycrushed, I admire you for having the courage to change your ways. I agree when you said you'll play your part as the wife. but what I can suggest to you and to the other wives here like me, to be the better wife. don't just be his wife. be like a mother, sympathetic, supportive and understanding. be like his best friend, someone he can talk his problems and dreams with. be like a mistress, do more in bed than what you can do in the kitchen.

let us treat our husbands as our number 1 because he deserves it. accept him for who he is because in reality, we can't change our husbands, we can only bring out the best in him. turn a blind eye on his bad side, always look at his good side. admire him for his best traits.

let us treat our husbands like kings and they will treat us like queens.

[langley]

let us treat our husbands as our number 1 because he deserves it. accept him for who he is because in reality, we can't change our husbands, we can only bring out the best in him. turn a blind eye on his bad side, always look at his good side. admire him for his best traits.

let us treat our husbands like kings and they will treat us like queens.

tama
behind every man's success is a woman
behind every man's fall is also a woman

kaya tayo ginawang mga babae ay para sa mga lalake. Tayo ang magpapaganda ng mga buhay nila with our womanly attributes. Kaya nasa babae yun kung pagagandahin niya ang buhay ng lalake o papapangitin niya.

[simang]

tama
behind every man's success is a woman
behind every man's fall is also a woman

kaya tayo ginawang mga babae ay para sa mga lalake. Tayo ang magpapaganda ng mga buhay nila with our womanly attributes. Kaya nasa babae yun kung pagagandahin niya ang buhay ng lalake o papapangitin niya.

let us treat our husbands as our number 1 because he deserves it. accept him for who he is because in reality, we can't change our husbands, we can only bring out the best in him. turn a blind eye on his bad side, always look at his good side. admire him for his best traits.

let us treat our husbands like kings and they will treat us like queens.

secrets of fascinating womanhood

[baliwsayo]

Mga sis ni-suggest ko lang naman yun BJ kasi nga I am aware na nababaling lang naman talaga ang attention ni hubby sa kabitch kasi magaling nga sa kama. Sa kwento naman ni toydoll, ayaw naman ni hubby na maghiwalay sila eh.. so ano pa bang dahilan bat niya hinahabol si kabitch di ba? Siyempre kailangan din natin tingnan yun kung saan tayo nagkulang bat siya naattract sa iba? Ang sabi nga babae naman kasi talaga nagdadala ng relationship di ba? Pag nag-fail ang relationship, kasi sumuko na yung babae. I remember my kumpare once said, pag daw pinakasalan ka ng lalake, it means binibigay niya yun 3 alas niya sa yo. May natitirang isang alas na minsan eh nabibigay niya sa ibang babae. So ang tanong, magpapatalo ka ba sa iisang alas lang? I know meron mga lalake na exceptional talaga ang pagiging walang kwenta.. eh siyempre ibang story naman na yun kung ganun. Hehe.

[bonita111809]

Mga sis ni-suggest ko lang naman yun BJ kasi nga I am aware na nababaling lang naman talaga ang attention ni hubby sa kabitch kasi magaling nga sa kama. Sa kwento naman ni toydoll, ayaw naman ni hubby na maghiwalay sila eh.. so ano pa bang dahilan bat niya hinahabol si kabitch di ba? Siyempre kailangan din natin tingnan yun kung saan tayo nagkulang bat siya naattract sa iba? Ang sabi nga babae naman kasi talaga nagdadala ng relationship di ba? Pag nag-fail ang relationship, kasi sumuko na yung babae. I remember my kumpare once said, pag daw pinakasalan ka ng lalake, it means binibigay niya yun 3 alas niya sa yo. May natitirang isang alas na minsan eh nabibigay niya sa ibang babae. So ang tanong, magpapatalo ka ba sa iisang alas lang? I know meron mga lalake na exceptional talaga ang pagiging walang kwenta.. eh siyempre ibang story naman na yun kung ganun. Hehe.

hindi lang din naman sa galing sa kama nadadaan ang mabuting samahan ng mag-asawa sis. this much is true, kahit gaano ka kagaling sa kama kung nagger ka, iniinsulto mo ang asawa mo pagdating sa income nya, pinapahiya mo sya, sinasaktan mo ang ego nya, at clingy ka, asahan mong hindi rin sya mapapalapit sayo.

a man don't want to go home to an unsympathetic woman. kaya may mga lalakeng pinipiling sumama sa kabit kase dun nila nakikita yung kalinga na dapat binibigay ng asawa nya, hindi lang dahil sa sex, kundi dahil sa unconditional love na binibigay nila.