Author Topic: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?  (Read 54081 times)

tomatostellar

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How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« on: July 28, 2012, 02:37:24 am »
there are some people talaga na I can't seem to say no to,,mga ka-close ko din na I know gipit talaga. Iba small amount lang heram, pero there are some people na di talaga nagbabayad =/ and these small amount sum up din to a bigger of course, pero sa iba ibang tao
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pinkberries

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #1 on: July 28, 2012, 03:17:53 am »
Find a reason to say NO.  ;)

Kahit ano... may babayaran kang credit card, strictly budget lang kasi pera mo dahil may loan kang binabayaran, o di kaya nanay na nanghihingi ng amount for her monthly salon visit.   ;D  just anything. 

Learn to say NO, especially to those na hindi marunong magbayad.  Kahit gaano pa ka emergency yan.  Remember, hindi lang siya ang may problema.  Ikaw din, you have your own battles to fight too.
Stand your ground.

saskia

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #2 on: July 28, 2012, 03:21:27 am »
sad to say, i simply can't.

hirap ako tumanggi sa mga ganyan kesehodang halos wala namatira sakin. feeling ko kase lahat sila matter or life and death  which i think is wrong and dapat ko mabago kase imposible naman talaga lahat ng nangutang sakin eh nasa life and death situation na.
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tomatostellar

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #3 on: July 28, 2012, 03:25:47 am »
^ parang ako pa kasi nag-guilty na di makapag paheram pag alam kong may spare ako,
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adrian

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #4 on: July 28, 2012, 10:22:28 am »
Ay Dios ko, sis, andaming beses na ako na-burn sa pag-papautang kaya nadala na ako.

Tama si pinkberries:

-Learn to say NO,
-especially to those na hindi marunong magbayad.  Kahit gaano pa ka emergency yan. 
-Remember, hindi lang siya ang may problema.
-Ikaw din, you have your own battles to fight too.

Life is hard and it can be a real battle at times. You give away your ammunition, what do you have to rely on to protect yourself? You work hard, YOU sacrifice, you earn your money, then people expect YOU to be their ATM....tama ba 'yon?


At si Saskia:

 -imposible naman talaga lahat ng nangutang sakin eh nasa life and death situation na.


CORRECT!
If these people can't even manage themselves na mai-control yung finances nila, prepared ka bang maging lifeguard when they get themselves into trouble again? Wag kang magpa-martyr sa needs ng mga walang disiplina, that's THEIR life, THEIR issue, not yours.

Sis tomatostellar
- parang ako pa kasi nag-guilty na di makapag paheram pag alam kong may spare ako,

Mahirap kasi when it comes to people is that we women are trained to take care of others, and to put other first, kaya when people ask for help and we can't or won't, kahit papano, we feel guilty.

Pwe, binitawan ko na yang mindset na 'yan. Ayaw ko mag-alaga ng matanda (ie, adult person) na parang bata kung kumilos sa buhay. Past a certain age, you have to be responsible for yourself. That's the mark of a mature person. Yuo want something, discipline yourself to get it and sacrifice for it, not run to anyone wailing that you have a boo-boo and hoping they make it better.


aquacharly

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #5 on: July 28, 2012, 10:52:54 am »
Do not show you carry around excess cash.
      Hwag maging mayabang; get a rep for being kripz.
      Quesa  naman get a rep for being galante -- then, the issue is not that you can't say "no", but that you perpetuate/feed your image of being galante.

Say sorry, kasya lang money ko for my lunch and snack & transpo.

If malaki asked for, a short term loan for hundreds or thousands -- say your money is always taken by your mom/hubby/sister kasi you committed to a fixed deposit  time deposit ek ek ek k ek.  Pag ka ask  you for details -- say: Basta the 1 handling it is your mom/hubby/sister or whoever

Or, a version thereof -- naka time deposit money ko. Tight budgeting ako

If truly gipit and you want to help but you doubt babayaran ka --  do not give the whole amount hinihingi -- give say 10-20% thereof, or whatever maluwag sa kalooban mo -- Then say: Sorry, that's all I have, Pero sa yo na yan -- hwag mo na bayaran. Usually, mahiya na yan balikan ka uli. Good riddance, 1 manguutang down!  hehe


« Last Edit: July 28, 2012, 10:59:20 am by aquacharly »

saskia

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #6 on: July 28, 2012, 01:16:55 pm »
Sorry, that's all I have, Pero sa yo na yan -- hwag mo na bayaran. Usually, mahiya na yan balikan ka uli. Good riddance, 1 manguutang down!  hehe

naku sis, that's the ideal scenario but sad to say, madami pa din who will take advantage of that tactic and would see it as an opportunity na "makalibre" nanaman next time..
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luckymommy88

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #7 on: July 28, 2012, 01:47:56 pm »
We have a monthly budget for extended family bigay or mga friends na nangungutang ni hubby sa excel to control na rin. Super inis lang ako this month kasi lumampas kami sa budget while yung recreational budget namin for the family hindi namin nagamit. Meaning kami tinitipid namin ang sarili namin, we work soooo hard but failed to reward ourselves this month samantalang yung iba napapagbigyan namin  :-\

Yung ibang tao kasi wagas mangutang, isang text lang gusto deposit agad or smart padala na namin agad. Buti na lang din kahit papano we usually don't give the whole amount asked us. 50-80% lang afterall kapamilya pa din or kaibigan yun, bayaran kami o hindi alam ko kahit papano nakatulong. Hirap din kasi talaga ako tumanggi lalo na pag talagang close.
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rianne_mallows

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #8 on: July 28, 2012, 02:35:27 pm »
I agree aquacharly.  Those tactics are enough to discourage the normal mangungutangs.

Pero Kung minamalas ka at kapal muks yung lumalapit sa iyo, iyong tipong makulit at nangonginsyensya, At parang ikawpa masama dahil lang hindi ka mkpg abot, ikaw din magdrama ka . Magkuwento kung paanong pagtitipid na ginagawa mo at yung mga bayarin mo etc etc. That's what my mom does.

I remember yung malyong kamag-anak namin, matanda lang sakin ng konti nangungutang sa nanay ko. Sabi ba naman ipangutang na lang daw siya ng nanay ko sa amin/mga anak niya para may maibigay sa kanya nasa sala din ako nun tapos sabay tingin sakin.
Sa inis ko sabi ko - close tayo?
Grabe talaga. Siya na pinakamakapal na nangutang na ive witnessed  so far
To think ang reason niyasa pangungutang eh pambayad sa mga kinakautangan niya

hindi naman ako masamang tao
sadyang kapag nasasabi ako ng totoo
tumatama at tumatagos sa pagkatao mo

marssie

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #9 on: July 28, 2012, 05:32:09 pm »
If you really cant say no at close sayo,bigyan mo nalang ng any amount, like a friend of mine, inaabutan na lang niya ng 1k (10K kasi hinihiram), then tell her yun lang kaya mo kahit wag na niya bayaran at sabay bulong na sana wag ng mangutang ulit at mahiya na hehe

Ako naman pag close ko pinahihiram ko lalo na kung alam ko namang marunong magbayad,kaso minsan kasi kahit may pera kang ipahihiram kung may expected ka ring pagkakagastusan di ko talaga mapahiram, mas nakakaloka naman na ipahiram ko pera ko tapos ako naman ang mangungutang ng gagamitin ko para sa kailangan ko.

aquacharly

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #10 on: July 28, 2012, 06:17:07 pm »
naku sis, that's the ideal scenario but sad to say, madami pa din who will take advantage of that tactic and would see it as an opportunity na "makalibre" nanaman next time..

Well, yes - sometimes kapalmukz babalik nga.
 So bweltahan Ko -- eh binigyan  na kita last time.  Tama na.  Ganon din ka kapalmukz  sagot. hehe

sixteen16

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #11 on: July 28, 2012, 06:41:14 pm »
Dretso ko sinasabing "WALA" ako mapapautang.. kaibigan, relatives, kung sino man yan.. why? nahihiya kasi ako maningil.. hinihintay ko na lang sila magkusang magbayad pero kapag wala talagang sila plano magbayad nagiging "bigay" tuloy. Dami ng beses sa mom ko pa lang.. ako ang pinapasingil.. ang nangyayari kapag pinupuntahan sa bahay laging wala, hindi sinasagot ang phone tapos minsan sila pa ang galit. nakakainis lang. sa inis mo hahayaan mo na lang hanggang sa makalimutan. Tapos minsan lakas pa ng loob magyabang sayo, e samantalang ang laki pa ng utang nila. hayy.. tapos kame ginagawa ang lahat para makatipid.. kainis lang talaga. imbes na wala kameng problema, sila ang nagbibigay ng problem sa amin.

ito na lang lagi ko tinatatak sa utak ko at sinasabi, "Neither a borrower nor a lender be".. para wala ng problema.. :)
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tomatostellar

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #12 on: July 28, 2012, 10:17:46 pm »
"Well, yes - sometimes kapalmukz babalik nga.
 So bweltahan Ko -- eh binigyan  na kita last time.  Tama na.  Ganon din ka kapalmukz  sagot. hehe"

hahaha i super like this aquacharly, kapalmukz meets kapalmukz,

naker thanks sa mga input nyo :)
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caterpillar-girl

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #13 on: July 29, 2012, 01:13:09 pm »
I tell them kakapautang ko palang dun sa isa kong friend. It's not true of course, hehe, but then it gets us (me and the person trying to borrow money from me) out of a lot of trouble. I say, "Ay sorry,  actually kasi kakapautang ko palang dun sa friend ko. Naunahan ka nya, sayang!" So they don't feel THAT bad. Hehe.

But you know, you shouldn't have to make up stuff. Just say, may hinuhulugan ka rin payments. Or just say, naku now's not a very good time. If nakaluwag luwag ako baka mapapahiraman pa kita. Pero right now kasi pareho lang tayo mejo gipit. Wala naman sila magagawa eh.
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Jihan_Sr

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #14 on: July 29, 2012, 01:32:00 pm »
nagpapahiram naman ako kapag kailangang kailangan talaga.
like sa office, sometimes pag nasho short ang officemates
at may extra naman ako, kahit 500 i let them borrow
cause binabalik naman.

pero may ibang officemate din na nagsisinungaling na kailangan
ng money kasi ganito ganyan, tapos malalaman mo kinabukasan
painom inom lang, dun ako nawawalan ng gana.
pag nanghiram ulit sinasabi ko na lang wala akong dalang pera
ngayon.

babae_po_ako

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #15 on: July 29, 2012, 01:51:17 pm »
yung nanay ko nagtatago at di nagpapakita sa mga nangungutang sa kanya..

mxherr5

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #16 on: July 29, 2012, 09:22:14 pm »
@aqua, same pla banat natin hehe
 ;D

I also tell potential borrowers that my money is tied up
in investments.

Pero like others said, there are still those who are very
makulit. I usually say that I'd have to pay a "fee" to get
that investment out  ;D so they'd have to pay me a
reasonable sum on top of what they want to borrow.

And unsecured loans are for the birds, I get any gadgets
they have like cellphones, psp,ps3,etc. If they're unwilling
to part with it, then I question just how "important" and
if it this is really a life or death situation if their gadget is
more important.

Note I've had all loans paid and have earned from those
fees   ;D

Except for my then girlfriend and my wife now. Sya lang
hindi pa nagbayad lol pero since wife ko na sya, it goes
without saying na quits na yun

leelou

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #17 on: July 29, 2012, 11:06:32 pm »
naala ko lang nuon, nag-cash advance ako sa credit card ng P80K para lang may maipautang sa friend pero medical emergency naman yun. meron din isa na di ko matandaan ang reason, nag-sangla naman ako ng jewelry para may maibagay lang. kaloka!  ;D buti na lang naibalik din naman sa akin hehe

tapos meron sa mga friends ko dito na naghihiram, alam mong magastos pa sayo. yung tipong ikaw eh nagtitipid para lang may ma-save talaga pero sila makikita mo, gastos ng gastos, updated sa gadget, ang porma. kainis!  >:(

usually sinasabi ko, wala ako available fund. nasa utangan din or kaya napadala ko na sa account ko sa pinas. ganun na kasi ginagawa ko ngayon, pinapadala ko kaagad para hindi na mautang bwahaha! kapag may sobrang makulit, at alam ko importante talaga, i lend mga 1/3 or 50% lang. pag alam ko hindi marunong magbayad, small amounts lang ibibigay ko, like 1K or 2K. kahit hindi mabayaran, ok lang  ;D
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juliaroberts

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #18 on: July 30, 2012, 09:58:27 am »
As much as i wanted to help you, di rin ako ka-liquid kasi marami din akong hinuhulugan/binabayaran.

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Re: How do you say NO sa mga NANGUNGUTANG sayo?
« Reply #19 on: August 08, 2012, 06:13:37 pm »
Pag ayaw ko pautangin, I tell them na I have no money to spare.  Yung iba kasi sa kanila namimihasa na e.  Nakikita ko na ang gastos nung iba, and hindi lang magastos ha, yung magastos pa na wala sa lugar, like bili ng bili ng unnecessary stuff like Starbucks, shopping ng shopping, papalit-palit ng cell phone, may Blackberry pang nalalaman--tapos lalapit kasi kulang sila sa pera, di umabot yung budget sa susunod na sweldo.

I have nothing against buying all that stuff and enjoying what money can bring.  What gets to me e yung mga namimihasa, yung lapit ng lapit para mangutang pero hindi nagtitipid.  Maaawa ako kung nakikita ko na nagsusumikap talaga yung tao magtipid and mag-ipon pero sadyang kinapos yung pera.  Walang kaso sa akin yun.  What I don't like e yung mga gastador, lalo na yung mga gastador na nagdradrama pa.

 


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