FLINGS

[jaemi33]

hmmm....IMO, Flings could be affairs with/without sex. Emotional attachment is already there. Parang kayo na hindi pa official. Having sex with someone doesn't make you his/her official partner rin naman minsan kaya I think it could be without sex too.

For FUBU naman, literal meaning of the word talaga. More on physical relationship and it doesn't necessary need an emotional investment for some people to do it. Purely sex. Maybe there are really no gray areas for guys, pero minsan hindi niyo maiwasan rin mainlove sa FUBU niyo ha. Pag ganun ba you still cal her your fubu? I think you would start prefering the word fling because you wouldn't want to call someone you love in that low titile (This sound so mean but I'm not trying to judge anyone here okay? :p). Just my opinion 

[spacemonkey]

@spacemonkey: yes we do

we just use the word fling to make the relationship sound decent. girls think it was a fling and not a fubu/fwb, because the guy is sweet and emotional and close to being in a relationship. guys are such good player, some guys use the 'sweet-i-want-you-to-be-my-gf-but-i-cant' technique to bed girls or to take advantage of them. girls think it was special and not just a playtime, thats what you girls think, and thats what we guys what you to think. guys have no gray area, white is white, black is black, no in betweens 

YOU might call it that, but guys i know have called a fling a fling, and a fuck buddy a fuck buddy. don't make up shit you know nothing about.

[Naughty^GuRu]

@spacemonkey:
i know my sh|t and im not making something up. try reading other's posts.
the guys you know who call fling a fling are the guys i know who call fubu/fwb a fling to make girls like you feel better and decent.

and what's up with the grumpy reply? you mad?  chill....

[spacemonkey]

you're right, because guys i know are pretty decent and well educated.

in fact, hardly any guy i know has ever actually called a "fuck buddy" a FUBU... unlike some JeJe^MoNs.

[Naughty^GuRu]

@spacemonkey: i'm sure they are educated and decent. much like you i suppose, very educated and decent 


just wondering what an educated and decent woman like you doing here in a jejemon infested forum. ajejejeje! 

thinking out loud: being educated and decent is so overrated nowadays

chill ms. Monkey. take a break have a banana 

[minatay91]

^ LOL Naughty^guru HAHAHA natutuwa ako haha

para sa akin, okay lang sana yung fling if consenting sila dalawa at experienced. I knoooow so many people in flings, fwb's, fubu's but I could tell na they're so experienced with it and they're enjoying themselves so who am I to judge what makes them happy? or itchy

What I just hate about flings is if non-consenting like what guy guru said. Some players, for some reason, don't pick the flingy-types na girl, and go for the naive and long-term relationship "serious" ones and trick them instead. Yung mga hindi talaga consenting like me because I know my weakness and limitations.

There was a guy na after a while, I was able to confirm na he's a hidden player type (you don't see him flirting around, but hidden lahat. Another "reformed" player taught me na may hidden players para hindi daw masira yung image or diskarte nila) and he just wanted me for sex  I didnt allow him to have sex--- ehh.. parang ni.withdraw siya sa pagcommunicate sa akin.

He claims na it's because he's embarrassed of what he did at hindi siya nagscore hahaha for some reason nakakalat na NBSB ako at hindi pa nakuha  but according to the reformed player, he said it's just da moves and emotional manipulation para humahabol ako sa kanya, (the reformed player knows na.attach ako) and he's waiting for me to go insane and chase him, but hindi kaya sa pride ko.

Eventually he went back to making pansin to me (after prettifying myself  and wearing sexy outfits) but I'm the one no longer making pansin to him. (reverse bittering)

sorry for the long post.

[angelzero]

^naku nabiktima ako ng ganyang tipo 2 times. first one was a blatant player pero pinatulan ko pa rin. naive eh. nbsb din ako that time. but in fairness, he apologized. that one was kinda my fault kasi di naman nya ko pinaasa.

the second one, eto yung paasa na guy, naghahanap lang pala ng rebound. it didn't end well kasi nag indecent proposal pa. syempre di ko pinatulan. this one it's the guy's fault. he knew he was playing a non-flingy type of girl yet gusto nya hahabul-habulin ko pa sya and see kung hanggang saan ako. similar to what happened to you sis minatay91.

[lovely_chic]

I am tired of this. Yung tipong play-play lang.. Mas mabuti yung wala kesa meron baka magka problema pa in the end.

[minatay91]

@sis angelzero

ahh dalawa na tayo sis. ako feel ko hindi talaga kaya ko yung friends with benefits especially if non-consensual.. hayy. pero when kaya yun mangyari na the guy makes it clear from the start? haller 

I'm still naive to the game naman. as in first time ko talaga ma.encounter yung ganitong tipong mga lalake. I'm used to being highly regarded and respected sa mga guys. #charlungs usually kase matameme sila sa akin.

I hate how they choose the unconsenting, gullible and inexperienced ones. ano? to take advantage? ma.ouch ilang pride if mas laki ang peanut ng girl kaysa sa bird niya? Why can't he pick on the ones who actually want to or feel like fooling around. gago

respect ko lang yung mga players who go for the ones na consenting or match nila. grrr sana I knew how to differentiate a hidden player and the real courting guy.. (aside from chismis lol  ) gago ko lang talaga. I'm just so happy na ma.pride ako. heh

[Naughty^GuRu]

IMO, loser lang yung guys na gumagamit ng emotions to get girls, desperate moves na kasi un. yung mga pa-sweet mga paasa. mas madali kasing ikama ang mga girls na may emotional attachments. as for me, right from the start sinasabi ko na yung expectations and limitation pero indirectly. i also don't treat girls na parang GF and sweet, i treat them casually na parang friend lang talaga. i don't even date them 

i know i'm a player pero number one rule ko is to never play with girls' emotion.

[minatay91]

@naughty^guru, how would you advise those na madaling ma.attach? does it all boil down to self-control and having no expectations? kase naman the actions and the words parang genuine...(well, of course  ) he treats you as if couple talaga and so sweet and paasa as you said. the only reason hindi ako nag.give in is because a lot of guys warned me against him. pero kapag wala sila, baka mapatay na ako sa kanya I know not all the time I'll meet those guys who'd actually look out for me (naswertehan lang talaga ako,  )I want to learn kase how to be emotionally distant without going through all the necessary heartbreak or disappointments and bitterness? (or do I have to? haha )

[angeleigh]

For me not worth it, hindi ako magaling magcontrol ng emotions ko. Baka sa umpisa fling ang usapan or understanding then sa huli
ako kawawa kasi mafafall ako. yay

[angelzero]

@minatay91

siguro sa experience mo rin malalaman. at women's instinct. and also listen to your friends, kasi they would probably smell if something's fishy.

at wala na rin siguro tayong magagawa kung naglipana mga lalakeng walang balls na taking advantage of naive girls. i guess you'll just have to take care of yourself na lang.

[minatay91]

they say, a wise man learns from his mistakes. The wiser man learns from other people's mistakes. so if I could learn to look out for warning signs muna or at least how to handle situations beforehand.. grabe ako talaga sa pagka inexperienced, I just read, listen and ask... A LOT. para hindi halatang ignorante. Well, what would you get from overly protective and paranoid parents? aside the fact that they create great liars

But offtopic na.

I had that instinct about him. As in meron talaga from the very start, pero walang basis. Just simple overthinking based on facebook. To be fair, akala ko lang judgemental lang ako and maybe hopefully I'd be wrong (but he wanted to prove me right all along  ) But I've never been so spot-on on my suspicions (and a whole lot more)

So I guess in the end, my standpoint would be, I won't trust if he's given me a reason not to trust him.  good luck to all of us. hahaha

[girlalou]

not worth it especially for girls if you easily fall in love, its a disaster

[clouds_1028]

Yes I had one nung college pa me. Funny thing is that i have a boyfriend back then. Kaso sobrang persistent nung college friend ko, lage niya ako kinukulit. Eh weakness ko yung looks niya na maputing chinito tapos sa ugali namin, majoke. Kaya ayun, we agreed to a game. Landian mode  Sama ko di ba? I broke up with my boyfriend then dahil ayoko naman mag-two time kaso etong boyfriend ko, ayaw din ako pakawalan. Sobrang gulo ng situation back then, lage nga ako umiiyak kasi hindi ko na alam gagawin ko. The good thing was, me and my college friend were in the right mind somehow. We ended things before it gets much worse. I asked for 1 month all to myself sa boyfriend ko para maassess ko yung sarili ko tapos I went back to him.

Masaya ang feeling ng may fling, kasi thrilling and bawal kasi.. pero in the end, karma will get you lalo na kung may nasasaktan kayong ibang tao.

[jaemi33]

I also had this "fling" experience and worst, it happened when I was still all naive and innocent lol Ang masakit pa yung friend na I treasured the most did this. Magiging mahaba yung post pag kinuwento ko pa pero for me one advice I could say is that don't give the guy too much information about you unless you are sure he will not take advantage of it. Kasi itong guy friend ko na to super close kami to the point he knows my weakness and na super naive pa ako, so he took that as his advantage and broke my heart big time.

After talaga ng experience kong ito, if may guy na nag aaproach sa akin, I admit naging protective na ako sa sarili ko. I didn't open up yung inner me talaga to guys until I know their motives. Siguro instinct narin talaga. I think guys who are sincere will stay without any condition especially physical thing, pero kung katawan lang talaga habol niya, he would be off your sight soon.

[gossipgirl22]

I've been in this kind of situation before. not once, not twice, but many times. I dont like commitment kase, i dont wanna go into a  serious relationship that will lead to break my heart bigtime, so the set up was the guy is serious na pala but for me it was just a plain fling.. and everytime andun na ko sa point na nararamdaman ko na it will step up to the next level, i stop communicating na., i know im bad and selfish that time cos i was focusing not to get attached so that i cant be hurt. but dont worry guys, im married now with a person who didnt treated me the right way.  and everytime we fight pinamumuka nya kung gaano ako hindi dapat respetuhin. so guys, please, dont be in this kind of relationship because there's always a karma. now i realize that those guys that im with before is much better than im with now.  but its too late when i realize that. 

[iseenessie]

I have had flings. And they were all fun. Kasi walang pressure. Walang expectations. Sometimes, we set up some rules. Sa iba naman we just wing it. They key to making this successful is to not invest emotionally. Don't let the person get to know you fully.

@gossipgirl22
Your husband is an *censored*. The fact that you have had flings does not make you less of a person. It does not reduce your worth. And it doesn't give him the license to disrespect you. Maybe wala lang sya magamit na argument laban sa iyo so he resorts to that.

[Lurker_Man]

been there done that..we have a brief sexual affair..she is older than me ng 2 years...wayback 2005 it was fun..kulitan... she is now married and until now we are friends