Four months na pero still di pa rin ako nakaka move on.
Ilang days ago lang nagalit na naman sya kasi nilapitan ko sya. Galit na galit sya kasi natadtad ko sya ng texts for three consecutive days. mga 50 texts a day.
Stop na ulet ako sa kakatext. nag stop na ako kulitin sya e pero nung na achieve ko naman yung "forgiveness" sa mga nagawa nya sa akin, naaalal ko kung gano sya kabuti sakin. na mas marami talaga yung mabuting nabigay at nadulot nya sa akin kesa sa masasama. Kaya i tried saying sorry. sabi ko finally na realize ko na. pero wala e. galit.
sana di ko na lang sya kinulit ng kinulit after break up baka kahit papano tinatrato nya pa rin akong friend. he was still very kind months after we break up, pero nasagad ko sya. grabe yung galit nya.
i love him very much and i don't think magmamahal pa ko ng tulad sa kanya. he is my dream guy. i;ve been waiting for someone like him all my life. mahirap humanap ng tulad nya, yung status, intelligence, calm, attittude, values, goals. saktong sakto sya. pero i took him for granted and now i no longer have him.
what's even worse than losing my boyfriend is losing my bestfriend. i really, really miss hanging out with him. we can talk about work, studies, anything under the sun. we can even drink beer together. bestfriend talaga

sobrang dami nanghihinayang sa relationship namin. kahit parents ko. wala na raw ako mahahanp na ganun kabait. pero nasagad ko nga. i cant even go near him. pinagsisishan ko nasagad ko sya...
btw, yung age nya he's mid-late 30s na ako naman early 20. fear ko mag-asawa na lang bigla since settled na sya sa buhay. stable na kumbaga. natatakot ako palitan nya ko. pero we were acquiantances before being bf-gf. at sa tagal ko sya kilala at tagal sya kilala ng friends nya, ako lang yung nakilala sa circles nya.
i'm still hoping that we'll get back together. wala namang cheating na naganap kasi. he just got fed up because of my jealousy. he also hated our frequent and intense arguments. he also hates it if oi over analyze or over think things. he told me i have changed a lot. i became self centered and uncaring. he also dislikes that im a text gnat. i do not nag kasi or talak kaya sa text lang ako. i do not even raise my voice when we argue.
knowing him, he is a very open person. dati naalala ko nag book kmi ng trip somwhere in visayas. sabi ko, pano kung break na tayo nito? sabi nya "malay mo dahil sa trip, magkabalikan tayo."
another example that he is open to change is that he told me "uy si ganto hindi na sya masyadong praning at commanding blah blah."
and as ive said we move in the same circleS. plus sa buong buhay nya, 2 pa lang kami napakilala nya sa pamilya nya despite having many flings (i told you i knew him before pa) and that's why i know that he is also suffering still maski sabihin nyang wala na syang paki sa akin.