15 minutes late policy:
wala pa si mam!
yung bag lang nya ang nsa table,
aftr 15 minutes umalis na ang mga students.
the next day ngalit c mam.
sabi,
"if my bag is here! it means I'm present!"
kinabukasan,
ngalit n nman c mam, guess what?
puro bag ang nasa upuan ng mga students.

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Alam mo kung anong makulet?
Sa spongebob squarepants,
Pagkatapos ni squidward maligo may towel sya sa baywang nya.
Pero pag nakabihis na sya, t-shirt na lang?
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A man buys a lie detector robot that slaps people who lie. he decided to test it at dinner:
Dad: Son where were you today during school hours?
Son: At school (robot slaps son)
Son: Okay I went to the movies!
Dad: Which one?
Son: Harry Potter (robot slaps again!)
Son: Okay I was watching porn.
Dad: What? When I was your age I didn't even know what porn was! (robot slaps dad)
Mom: Hahahahaha! after all he is your son!(robot slaps mom).
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Sa Party.
MOM: Son, please lead the prayer.
JUAN: Paano po?
MOM: Just pray what you heard me pray kanina.
JUAN: JUSKO KO! BAKIT KO INIMBITA ANG MGA TAONG ITO! ANG LALAKAS LUMAMON!