Marriage problems/issues/ complaints etc. pasok dito...

[Queserasera]

sino pwedeng gumawa ng new thread nito please? 😘

[three8one]

^ kung ako sasabihan ng ganun halimbawa babae ako, makakatikim sakin yan ng mag asawang sampal, tadyak, suntok at lahat na ng pananakit para sya na ang maunang mamatay.

[Evolet027]

Sisses pag sinabihan kayo ng hubby nyo na "ba't hindi ka pa mamatay" while in a heated argument, hihiwalayan nyo na ba?

OO naman. agad agad.

[Girltalker2]

Sisses pag sinabihan kayo ng hubby nyo na "ba't hindi ka pa mamatay" while in a heated argument, hihiwalayan nyo na ba?

Not without telling him na - inaantay lang kita mauna 😂

[AprilGal26]

Sisses pag sinabihan kayo ng hubby nyo na "ba't hindi ka pa mamatay" while in a heated argument, hihiwalayan nyo na ba?

ay, super foul naman nyan. I have that. That's one of the reason why i broke up with my husband. I hate being emotionally and verbally abused! Kaka-highblood ha

[mysterioza_me]

Sisses pag sinabihan kayo ng hubby nyo na "ba't hindi ka pa mamatay" while in a heated argument, hihiwalayan nyo na ba?

For me depende. Kasi sometimes people tend to say things that they dont really mean kapag nasa gitna ng heated argument. Kung after naman ng argument at nakapagpalamig na. Tapos nagsorry siya and talagang nagpakita na remorseful siya sa nasabi niya, patatawarin ko. Pero kung talagang hanggang makapagpalamig siya at gusto pa din niya akong mamatay, hiwalayan na yan. Saka kapag paulit-ulit na ang pagsasabi ng di maganda, hiwalayan na din.

[kaythrielle]

sis erialc, how did you respond?
you and your hubby need to talk when emotions are not too high na, para the two of you can communicate in a calm manner. ask him bakit nya nasabi yun. there?s no excuse for him to say it, it was totally unnecessary and way out of line....pero at least malaman mo baka may malim na pinaghuhugutan sya na hindi mo alam.
Open and honest communication is the key.

[yukishih]

Issue: Husband to drop off and pick up kids from school?
Hindi ko akalain na ito pala ay issue dahil lang nanay ang mostly nagsusundo sa anak. Nakatira kami overseas and I work 10hours a day. I start at 0800-1800 hours or if early shift 0730-1530 hours ako. Ang oras ng school dito 0900-1530. Itong partner ko night shift. Same kami ng work. Niraise ba naman na issue yon dahil daw sya lang ang tatay na nagsusundo ng anak. Imbers matuwa sya to drop off and pick up his kids may resentment pala. Napaka unreasonable. I offerred to resign para masundo ko ang mga bata na as if kaya ng sahod nya alone ang gastusin. Sobrang nanggigil ako sa sobrang ka immaturan nya.

[mysterioza_me]

^Uhm nakakabawas ba ng kamachohan kapag naghahatid at sundo ng kids sa school? 🤔

[Evolet027]

^^ mas cool pa nga tingnan mga dads na hands on sa anak. Yeah, your hubby is immature. 

[bratty]

^^no sis! Pag napapa-aga ako sa school ng mga anak ko, natutuwa ako makita pag daddy ang nakikita ko nagsundo sa school. Saka makikita mo tuwa ng mga bata pag magulang ang nasundo sa kanila.

^^^immature nga para maging issue pa yan. I assume may sasakyan naman kayo. Yung reason na puro mothers naghahatid-sundo sa school, napaka-lame, tbh! Either you resign or ipa-cover mo sa kanya ang school service ng mga bata.

*inedit ko yung carets

[mysterioza_me]

Daddy ko naghahatid-sundo sa anak ko and pamangkin pero never ko narinig nagreklamo. Saka kapag may programs sa school uso na din stage fathers. Wala naman nagja-judge sa kanila. Kaya di ko magets ano issue kung magsundo or hatid ang tatay sa school.

[bratty]

Saka kapag may programs sa school uso na din stage fathers. Wala naman nagja-judge sa kanila.

Totoo ito. Sila pa yung game na game, zumba kung zumba! Nakaka-aliw lang 😊

[yukishih]

Ewan ko nga eh. May sasakyan naman kami. Bug deal nga. Susunduin mo ang anak mo bawas agad sa pagiging lalaki mo. Sobrang pikon ako sa issue sisses. Hindi makatarungan. Tama kayo mas nakakatuwa pa na dad ang magsundo. Sabi ko nga magresign ako para di lang makabawas sa ego nya ang napakalalim na pinaglalaban nya.

[kvandenhaak]

^Sabihin mo kay Mister, these wives are probably thinking how lucky the wife is for having a dad na hands-on. Di nya alam they wish they have a hubby like that, which can be true. Para mahimasmasan ng kaunti.

[lalee888]

Na-shock ako sa hubby mo sis. Did you know that Bill Gates does the dishes at home? And that he drives his children to school everyday in the opposite direction of his office? He never complained. Roles are not supposed to be gendered, iba na ang panahon ngayon, practicality is key.

Heres the article interview of Melinda Gates discussing how Bill drops the children at school and how it actually changed the behavior of dads at that school.

https://www.forbes.com/sites/carolinehoward/2018/02/14/melinda-gates-i-get-angry-for-all-the-women-all-over-the-world-that-this-has-happened-to/

[kvandenhaak]

^Total opposite of Steve Jobs, apparently!

[Apple1230]

@yukishih baka may insecurities yung partner mo. I have no idea na role pala ng babae ang maghatid at magsundo sa school.

Growing up it was my dad kasi siya ang marunong mag drive, actually mostly dads and men(school service drivers) ang nag hahatid at sundo kasi back then mga lalake ang marunong mag drive hindi pa ganun kadami ang women drivers 80's and 90's.

Maybe get to the bottom of why it bothers him kung siya lang ang lalake dun e ano naman. And he is not doing it for his image, he is doing it so the kids can get to and back from school safely. Ang arte niya naman.

[lalee888]

^actually good advice ito sis @yukishih -- get to the bottom of your husband's issues kasi parang ang weird lang na issue yan sa kanya. Does he feel emasculated (and i roll my eyes as i say this) or may ibang issue?

I understand you live abroad (sorry not sure where) so context can be kind of important too. Here in the US for example, there's this whole "soccer mom" stereotype -- housewives basically run the show when it comes to dealing with kids... while i don't think it was really a gendered issue (the whole soccer mom stereotype), it has highlighted the underlying  sub-issues concerning parenting lifestyle.

Try to talk to your hubby and ask really why? If he feels na "pinagtitinginan sya" ng moms who drop off their kid -- are his feelings because he feels insecure/emasculated/out of place? then address that..

Is it because he feels vulnerable? where i live, there is a sub-culture where dads with kids are seen as super attractive and they get stares and flirtatious looks from other women... even the unattractive dads suddenly seem gwapo because they look so cute with a kid... maybe your husband feels vulnerable with this type of attention and natatakot sya to fall for it?

Obviously what i said are just speculations and guesses..point is alamin mo yung real issue nya. Baka din he really feels insecure na hindi nya afford to support your family on his single income and na-highlight yun when he saw he had to work around your family's schedule and drop the kids off at school.. to me it is a non-issue and it doesn't mean naman na your hubby is sexist but baka personal goal nya/dream nya, to support you and his kids without you having to work for a living (but to work for a passion).

Nakakagulat lang kasi ang babaw na issue, but it's a symptom of something.. good luck sis!

[lordknight_aiz.18]

This is just from another perspective..

If your partner works at night, maybe by the time he gets home, he?s very tired na rin to take the kid to school? Is it not possible na ikaw na maghatid before you go to your work? Medyo mapapaaga nga lang ng dating ng bata sa school.. or maybe pareho kayo magkaroon ng schedule of bringing your child to school or ikaw tagahatid, siya tagasundo..

Baka gusto lang ng partner mo is to feel na pareho kayo may role sa paghatid sundo sa school.. hindi puro lang siya..

Let me just share this.. Ako rin taga hatid sundo sa son ko everyday kasi ako ang available and same sila ng oras ng pasok ng husband ko pero opposite direction. There are times when i also feel na napapagod and naiinsecure ako. (The insecurity is coming from me not working then ang kasabay ko pag nagsusundo sa school are drivers and yayas( nothing against them). When I feel that way,  I tell that to my husband and it is great of him to acknowledge my feelings. Hindi niya ko inaaway at sinasabing immature, maarte, or ang babaw ko. He reassures me na maganda ang ginagawa ko and he appreciates it. And once in a while, he finds time na siya naman ang maghatid/sundo sa school.

 My point here is dont take it against him if he feels embarrassed taking the child to school. Be the kind and understanding partner that you have to be. Sabi nga ng previous comments, talk to him and know the underlying issues. Baka all he needs is reassurance coming from you and if possible, have a share also in taking your child to school..