After discovering that he cheated, how did u move on? ok pa kayo or hindi na?

[gorgeous_mommie]

its ok to forgive and forget.. ive done it several times.. pero ive realized dapat pala meron din hangganan..

[paulka]

with me, he did not actually had an affair but what made him a cheater is that, he went out with his
ex live in partner during those times that we fought or we had our cool off period.  And the nasty ex of
him got pictures of those gimiks that she posted on her own FS account to taunt me.  It was
only then that i got to know about it.  It was a huge fight, at first he kept denying it until one day he went
home drunk and just started admitting the meet ups.  His reason, we are not together that time and it
was for a free drink / gimik.  Sooooooooo lousy excuse.  Why is it that when i brought a guy friend during
those times also, he got mad.  Unfair right.

But since then, i felt the change of heart and lost of trust.

[engroselle]

It’s been a while since I made my last post here. Medyo naging busy. We moved to a new house kasi. This time, it’s our own house na. we used to live with my in-laws…

I could say that I am happy. New house, living independently, freedom kasi kami lang talaga sa house (mahirap makisama,e… ;p), my own house rules, hindi mahirap gumalaw, controlled yung house bills, the works talaga.

But sometimes, sumasagi sa isip ko yung anak nya dun sa kabila. And everything that he did to me. Why is it that parang hindi ako makamove on? Yung sakit, parang kahapon lang? parang may switch na pag wala akong ginagawa, yun ang pumapasok sa isip ko. Na niloko ako…

In fairness kay hubby, matino na sya. Nasa oras ang uwi at palaging nagtetext. Takot din kasi sya sa pwede kong gawin. At ayaw nyang magkahiwahiwalay kami. The girl doesn’t demand anything. Ayaw nya ng gulo pa. kaya naman nya suportahan ang kid…the girl did not know na married na si hubby...

What keeps bugging me is yung mga days na alam kong sila ang magkasama dati… I made a moviemaker presentation for him, 3 xmasses yata ago. I browsed thru his laptop to find more pics of him… I got one na isinama ko sa presentation… only to find out later that it was taken sa girl’s house…

Hindi ako galit sa kanya, pero galit ako sa mga ginawa nya sa akin… is that really possible? Naguguluhan nako. I cant talk to him about this kasi wala ring nangyayari… we’re coming from different ends,e. nag-uungkatan lang daw kami ng nakaraan…

How do I move on? Mahirap kasi tanggapin ang nangyari kasi may anak sila… she has a hold on my husband… yes, he’s with me pero he left a big part of him with her… pinagkaiba lang namin, kasal kami, sila hindi…

i've read na you should focus on the things that you have, than on what you have lost... pero ang hirap,e... how?

di ko alam san magsisimula... o kung kaya ko ba talaga tanggapin ang mga nagyari...

i need help... 

[smoothie]

^i really can't give you an advice. but i just want to say that you are not alone. we are on the same boat and i can totally relate to you. i posted my story here. (back read na lang).

it's been 4-5 months since he got caught and like your hubby he's trying to show his good side but i'm still having a hard time moving on also.

[mafee]

nakaka inspire naman mga stories and nakaka lakas ng loob

[euwie]

Yung sa akin naman, it's been 1 year 4 months na since nahuli ko sya. Pero ganon pa rin. Maski anong effort nya, hindi ko talaga makalimutan. Naaawa ako sa asawa ko kung bigla na lang ako mamatay knowing na hindi ko sya mapatawad completely. Sabi nila, wag ko na daw isipin, yun daw solusyon. Pero paano? Maski sa dreams ko yun pa rin. Kung alam ko lang talaga kung paano makalimutan at tanggapin, gagawin ko talaga. Kung may operation lang talaga where we could select our memories, ginawa ko na talaga. Hay…

[eimerej5]

Hi, I would just like to kwento something na matagal na namin pinagtatalunan ni bf. Hope to hear someone's thoughts on this.

Long long ago, medyo shaky pa yung relationship namin ni bf and we went through this phase na we were sort of drifting apart. One time, I was egging him through text na pumunta kami sa mega, and he kept putting it off or minsan deadma lang.

So one day I went on my own. Lo and behold, nakita ko sya may kasamang officemate at sya pa ang may bitbit ng binili ng babae, which is a very magaan pair of shoes lang naman na any wimpy kid can carry on his/her own, kaya naman suspicious ako. Hindi naman nya ako pinagbubuhat ng anything unless mabigat talaga, so it was sort of very suprising to me na sa iba palang tao eh iba sya. Anyway, I waved over to him and they approached me. Hindi makatingin sa akin ng diretso yung babae. I'm not kidding. She was sort of hiding herself behind bf every chance she got. After a few minutes, sinabi ni bf na alis na raw sila. So bigla ako naiyak. LOL. Kasi here I was, waiting for him to go to a mall with me, tapos he'll brush me off ng ganun na lang.

So I was crying and crying, and people were already looking at me funny. So console nya ako. PERO! After about 15 minutes, he said kailangan na raw nya ako iwan kasi nakakahiya sa officemate nya, hindi naman daw marunong bumalik sa office yun. He explained na hindi naman daw nila plan pumunta sa mega ng sabay, sumabay lang talaga yung girl.

So naloka ako. I was breaking down in the middle of mega, and he was more worried about what the girl would think.

My question is, hindi ba cheating na ito? He cheated on me, right? Granted I wasn't sure there was sex involved, pero di ba there was something suspicious going on and it's not just my imagination?

----

Well, we're together pa rin naman pero aaminin ko, girls, na regret ko yun. Alam ko makakahanap ako ng ibang guy, pero at the time I stupidly thought otherwise. Now it's too late. Anyway...

Magulo, no.

(Yikes, my post is so long pala. Salamat sa magtytyaga basahin.)

sis, bakit ganun? iniwan ka and sinamahan yung officemate? eh pwede ka naman niya isama at the same time d ba.

kung sa aken nangyari yung situation na yun i will insist of going with them, after all i am the gf..

[euwie]

^kung sa kin mangyari to, sorry na lang sila. Wala ng sali salita, uumbagan ko talaga sila pareho. Lalo na yung babae. Hay ang saya ko lang kung nabigyan ako ng ganyang chance na makita sila in action. Di na ko papakademure. Anyway manggigigil rin naman ako kung pa effect pa ako na dedma lang, pa poise kuno. At wala ng usapan pa. Ex na sya! My gulay! Kaloka!

[eimerej5]

kadalasan office affairs talaga ang case.

Ako, pina resign ko asawa ko, kasi i cant bear the fact na mag kikita sila everyday sa company. He ventured for another work.

I understand innate sa ating mga babae ang martyr. Pero naman, tinanggap mo un husband mo ulit because he was sorry. So he have to live sa patakaran natin

Girls, who run the world? It is us.

sis buti ka pa pede lumipat ng work ang husband mo, ako hindi eh kasi nasa company niya ang papers niya at saka we are in a different country kaya nag hirap ng basta lumipat lang.. so ayun everyday sila nagkikita, Hindi naman naging sila, sabi niya, naging crush lang niya yung girl... but for me i think he really liked him kasi may mga sweet text siya sa kanya noon... they are in the same department pa ha... hay.... im trying my best not to think about it, but there are times bigla na lang ako kinukutuban,, do u think there is something  happening or its just me? hayz..

[eimerej5]

Yung sa akin naman, it's been 1 year 4 months na since nahuli ko sya. Pero ganon pa rin. Maski anong effort nya, hindi ko talaga makalimutan. Naaawa ako sa asawa ko kung bigla na lang ako mamatay knowing na hindi ko sya mapatawad completely. Sabi nila, wag ko na daw isipin, yun daw solusyon. Pero paano? Maski sa dreams ko yun pa rin. Kung alam ko lang talaga kung paano makalimutan at tanggapin, gagawin ko talaga. Kung may operation lang talaga where we could select our memories, ginawa ko na talaga. Hay…

sis, its really hard to forget something that had hurt us so bad... its not a joke to be cheat at and be betrayed... but sana in time maayos na din lahat and let that nightmare be gone forever...

[eimerej5]

with me, he did not actually had an affair but what made him a cheater is that, he went out with his
ex live in partner during those times that we fought or we had our cool off period.  And the nasty ex of
him got pictures of those gimiks that she posted on her own FS account to taunt me.  It was
only then that i got to know about it.  It was a huge fight, at first he kept denying it until one day he went
home drunk and just started admitting the meet ups.  His reason, we are not together that time and it
was for a free drink / gimik.  Sooooooooo lousy excuse.  Why is it that when i brought a guy friend during
those times also, he got mad.  Unfair right.

But since then, i felt the change of heart and lost of trust.

sis, i heard this in a movie, " kapag pala may kulang dito, dun pupunta ka sa labas at dun mo hahanapin! Bakit hindi ka tumingin sa atin? sa akin? para sana naman, susubukan natin makahanap ng solution."

Tama naman ang sinabi hindi ba? bakit sa iba ka pa pupunta at sa iba pa titingin kung nandun naman ang gf or wife mo nagaantay lang sayo...

cool off kayo that time that they hang out but it doesnt mean that he can fool around just like that then kapag ikaw ang gumawa ng ganun eh galit na galit siya.... duh...

[euwie]

^sis, would you believe, hindi ako kinutuban nung time na yun. Pero sa dreams ko, kung sino yung kinabit ng asawa ko in reality, sya rin kabit ng asawa ko sa dreams ko. Super tiwala ako kasi sa asawa ko kaya ang hirap tanggapin. Akala naming lahat talagang perfect bf na sya nun. Kakaiba di ba. Talagang totoo na pala dreams ko nun, binalewala ko lang. Sayang!

Everyday talaga is a challenge for me. Extra challenge talaga grabe. Siguro kapag magkababy na kami, magbabago na ako towards him.

[passionfruity]

^^ madalas sa hindi tumpak talaga pag kinutuban ako.Pero sempre we shouldnt rely sa kutob lang..kumbaga lets take our kutob as an alarm and do some diligent research to prove ourselves of whats really happening behind our back (not to prove to our husband) na totoo nga ang kutob naten sa kanila. before ko natuklasan ang hidden FB account ni hubby may mga kutob kutob na ako sa kanya based on some behavioral changes sa kanya but because kasing taas pa nun ng mount Everest ang trust and respect ko sa kanya di ko inentertain ang kutob ko just until  tadhana na gumawa ng way for me to discover something real messy.

^ I do also believe that dreams do give some pahiwatig din..kelangan nga lang very keen tayo to analyze it. kasi di lahat ng nagaganap sa dreams naten eh ganun nga exactly ang message na ipinahihiwatig sa aten. but before I discovered my husband's hidden facebook account na may mga naka add na mga gurls na di ko kilala eh napanaginipan ko syang may kabit daw. Tho di sya umamin na may nakarelasyun/fling/kaharutan sa FB nya but he admitted he had chats with some. di rin nya sinabi sino sa mga babaeng yun.So I just hope wala nga talaga happened aside from friendly chat lang kasi almost one year old din yung account na yun bago ko nadiskubre..

[engroselle]

Yung sa akin naman, it's been 1 year 4 months na since nahuli ko sya. Pero ganon pa rin. Maski anong effort nya, hindi ko talaga makalimutan. Naaawa ako sa asawa ko kung bigla na lang ako mamatay knowing na hindi ko sya mapatawad completely. Sabi nila, wag ko na daw isipin, yun daw solusyon. Pero paano? Maski sa dreams ko yun pa rin. Kung alam ko lang talaga kung paano makalimutan at tanggapin, gagawin ko talaga. Kung may operation lang talaga where we could select our memories, ginawa ko na talaga. Hay…

i've been in a vicious cycle for 2 years now... happy-sad-happy-sad.... he told me to forget everything and move on... paano?...
 think of what we have now daw... as if naman what we have now, changes the fact that he cheated on me at nagkaanak pa sila... parang ganun lang kasimple yun.... feeling nya kasi, kahit anong gawin, he'll never win... na hindi ko na makakalimutan ang mga nangyari... na habang buhay ko na syang uusigin sa ginawa nya... naaawa din ako sa husband ko... but what can i do? i can not pretend and be okay, just because he demands me to?... i want to be okay na... napapagod na rin ako... 

ayokong ako ang maging dahilan para ma-stuck kami in this limbo... sana nga may switch to turn everything around... 

[smoothie]

sis, if it's not making you happy and kung hindi mo talaga matanggap then i guess it's time to move on. kaysa forever kang ganyan.
it's actually one of my options. i'm weighing myself kung kakayanin ko ba talaga. like you may days na i'm okay
may days na i'm angry and depressed.

bty sis, do you pray or go to mass? kami kasi hindi kasi magka-iba kami ng religion. but since this happend,
we are trying to attend service kasi sabi niya nakakatulong daw sa kanya. which i hope na talagang
makatulong.

buti na lang hindi nabuntis ni hubby yung girl kasi kung ganyan nangyari hindi ko na siya babalikan talaga.

[feisty_angel4]

Since the incident na nagtetext yung bitter na kabitch last June, so far I know na wala na sla and my hubby is trying his best to be a good father and husband to us. I have to forgive myself for being too harsh upon myself and of course sila din dapat mapatawad ko. I have forgiven my husband, but you know.... there is this scar that so difficult to remove. Scar na sya and I hope it will eventually fade. Pray pa din lage, always hanging on to our faith that whatever God is making us go through, HE has a good reason for it. Kaya yun lang ang iniisip ko. Whatever the future brings, I will be strong for our son and our future kids. They will always be my strength.

[fegloria1954]

There are many forms of infidelity.

Many people think that infidelity happens only when merong kabit - they are mistaken.  Infidelity happens when anyone or anything becomes one's priority over one's own spouse e.g., your work or your child/ren or your barkada or your own interests or your family of origin (your parents, your siblings), internet, etc. are your priority and your own spouse has to wait for your attention kasi hindi siya ang priority mo, THEN that is also infidelity.

There are many forms of cheating.

The moment that one's act of cheating denies one's spouse access to what he/she should have access to - including correct/true information - then that is cheating!!!

Does infidelity and/or cheating help nurture a marriage relationship?
NO.

Think about it.

Mommy Fe

[eimerej5]

sis, ako din na

^sis, would you believe, hindi ako kinutuban nung time na yun. Pero sa dreams ko, kung sino yung kinabit ng asawa ko in reality, sya rin kabit ng asawa ko sa dreams ko. Super tiwala ako kasi sa asawa ko kaya ang hirap tanggapin. Akala naming lahat talagang perfect bf na sya nun. Kakaiba di ba. Talagang totoo na pala dreams ko nun, binalewala ko lang. Sayang!

Everyday talaga is a challenge for me. Extra challenge talaga grabe. Siguro kapag magkababy na kami, magbabago na ako towards him.

naku sis, ako din napaginipan ko yung girl but nung time na yun wala naman ako inisip na iba. Ang nasabi lang nya meron siyang officemate na single at maganda. irereto daw nya sa friend namin.. Pero napansin ko din na may excitement sa voice nya kasi that time, LDR kami dahil nasa pinas pa ako. NUng napunta na ako dito saka ko naconfirm that he got attracted to the girl but hanggang ganun lang daw. There is no relationship between them. I dont know if u had read my story but dahil sa mga text kaya naconfirm ko and nung kinausap ko siya he admitted it...

I think our dreams warn us of what is happening or what is going to happen. Sometimes maybe we should not ignore those signs and warnings.. Baka kasi may meaning pala talaga ang mga yun..

[eimerej5]

^^ madalas sa hindi tumpak talaga pag kinutuban ako.Pero sempre we shouldnt rely sa kutob lang..kumbaga lets take our kutob as an alarm and do some diligent research to prove ourselves of whats really happening behind our back (not to prove to our husband) na totoo nga ang kutob naten sa kanila. before ko natuklasan ang hidden FB account ni hubby may mga kutob kutob na ako sa kanya based on some behavioral changes sa kanya but because kasing taas pa nun ng mount Everest ang trust and respect ko sa kanya di ko inentertain ang kutob ko just until  tadhana na gumawa ng way for me to discover something real messy.

^ I do also believe that dreams do give some pahiwatig din..kelangan nga lang very keen tayo to analyze it. kasi di lahat ng nagaganap sa dreams naten eh ganun nga exactly ang message na ipinahihiwatig sa aten. but before I discovered my husband's hidden facebook account na may mga naka add na mga gurls na di ko kilala eh napanaginipan ko syang may kabit daw. Tho di sya umamin na may nakarelasyun/fling/kaharutan sa FB nya but he admitted he had chats with some. di rin nya sinabi sino sa mga babaeng yun.So I just hope wala nga talaga happened aside from friendly chat lang kasi almost one year old din yung account na yun bago ko nadiskubre..

Sis, bakit need niya i secreto ang fb account niya? buti nadiscover mo.. paano mo nadiscover pala?
 
I have a friend na hindi niya alam na may fb account din ang husband niya. Kasi i asked her if she have a fb account because hinahanap ko siya sa mga friends ng husband niya and wala siya dun. Thats why i called her to asked her and dun nya nalaman na meron fb ang husband niya na hindi man lang siya ina-add till now... anyway, they are divorced now.. so no need to add his ex husband's fb acct to hers.

[passionfruity]

Actually sis unplanned at unexpected ang pagkakadiscover ko ng account nya..thanks to my Alma Mater.haha..kasi inadd ko yung alma mater ko sa FB profile ko then when i clicked the link eh di lumabas yung mga nag add din ng Alma mater kong yun and there I found our family pic sempre nagulat ako bakit family pic namin ang gamit na profile pic eh di ko kilala yung profile name na nakalagay. Inisip ko pa nung nakita ko yung pic namin na baka nanakaw.haha( in fairness of all fairness family pic namen ang profile pic ginamit nya.) Ang reason nya when I asked him eh for work purposes daw yung hidden account nyang yun..
pero sempre i didnt buy his alibi. ano ko grade 1 section 100?

 im sorry to hear bout your friend's divorce..muntik ko narin hiwalayan asawa ko pero I chose to give another try kasi kaya ko pa sabihin sa kanya na mahal ko sya at ganun din sya sakin despite of his lies and betrayal..I just hope when he comes home masettle na talaga namin at mafix those broken pieces..