After discovering that he cheated, how did u move on? ok pa kayo or hindi na?

[eimerej5]

4th stage pa ang acceptace... ang tagal naman...

its true na bumabalik balik talaga ang feeling of pain na parang kakatapos lang mangyari... kaya mahirap talaga..

ako its been 1yr and 4 mos na pero may pain pa din... wala naman dw sila ngkarelationship, nagandahan lang dw sya pero sabi ko nga, its one thing to admire a person but its another thing if you act on it, like texting her, pasweet stuffs.. hay eto na naman ako, naalala ko na naman... And can you blame me eh evryday sila magkasama, nagkikita dahil officemates sila. the same department. mas matagal pa niya kasama yun kasya sa akin...

if you'll think about it ang mga may work sa office aalis ng maaga like 7am then dadating sa house ng 7 or 8 pm. kakain, nood tv den mga 10 or 11 sleeping time na. so, kung bibilangin mo ang oras na magkasama kami in a day its only for 4-5 hrs. hindi ko binibilang ang pagtulog dahil wala naman un eh, tulog kami pareho, hindi naman kami nguusap na nun.. hehe!

then if you'll count the times na nasa office cya in a day its 10-12 hrs... so, see what i mean.. sino ba naman ang hindi makakaisip na baka naman may something pa.. but im trying not to think about it...


ang one more thing sa tingin nyo ba alam nung girl na ganun yung ngyari sa amin? lately kasi d na siya ngtetext kasi one time i asked may husband bakit nya erased yung msg nung babae sabi naman niya hindi naman daw eh nakita ko sa online billing yung receive at sent msgs eh kaya alam ko...

[eimerej5]

Di na ako papayag na ikulong nya lang ako sa bahay at gawing nanny ng mga  anak nya tapos mag hahanap sya ng thrill at excitement sa mga babaeng naka  uniform, naka makeup at my career kasi ako asawa ,yaya nalang ang arrive sa kanya at wala ng magic.

well said sis... oo nga hindi nga pwede ang ganun na ikaw nasa house at siya nandun nghahanap ng excitement sa iba... ako din kapag pwede na ako magwork, i will!

[redlane]

^sis why does hubby need to lie kung nagtetext pa rin yong girl? kainis to huh? Naku I experience this too like many times, thru text ko rin nalalaman...pero after ko mabuking stop na. Nakakalikot ko talaga ang lahat ng features ng phone niya just to 'investigate'...if he had the guts to lie to me by texting pacute stuff sa ibang girls I had to armed myself the guts to act as an investigator/ inspector too.

I share the sentiments with you and passionfruitty,...baka nakakalimutan nila they work peacefully, comfortably kasi alam nilang may magaling na nagaalaga sa mga anak nila who are sometimes under paid and overly neglected. If they want an extremely attractive woman waiting at home, add the family budget thousands of pesos for the twice a week derma, thrice a week gym, organic groceries, costly facial creams etc...

hehe, ewan ko lang di sila mangarag sa kakatrabaho..

[passionfruity]

@ smoothie honestly sis di pa talaga ako nakakapag move on. The pain is still there, the anger, all negative thoughts.  Im even considering to see a psychiatrist na pero advise ng tita ko i better see a psychologist.

Tsaka eto, pagsali sa mga online forums and websites specifically dealing on cheated wives eh nakakatulong din kasi Im able to see different views and insight ng bawat cheated women that most of it eh inspiring talaga..

Tsaka share ko rin comment ni miss Aquacharly on one thread I had started,
"BUT my real answer is:  Self Empowerment.  Nothing beats an answer like that.
Whatever curved balls Life throws at you, you will never be a Loser if you are self-empowered.
Kahit na ba ilang heartbreaks magpaka martyr ka to take...  kahit na you go almost over the brink and entertain murderous thoughts... you will never cross the line to hopelessness and desperate moves and never end up a Loser... kasi there will always be your OWN funds and assets to boink! you back to sanity and to knowing the lyrics to the songs:  Free Again! and  It's Raining Men Hallelujah talaga!"

Kaya this time Im really decided to have a job again. Pag siguro may work na ulit ako I could earn back my self worth and confidence. and so as my freedom from desperate inferiority and insecurity.

[sunnymel]

   The pain is still there after two years! sobrang sakit coz I trusted him fully then magagawa nya pala ito. I cried and cried and I even tried comiting suicide infront of him and my kids. Ilang ulit kong tinanong and ilang ulit din nyang dineny, huhu.
   marami akong giniveup for him tpos gnito. Kung may work pa din sana ako, alis talaga ako sa amin with my kids! We're still together pero I cant trust him na. Pagkagaling sa work everyday, di na mawawala ang duda ko sa kanya. So parang di pa ako makamove on. I love him thats why we're still together though honestly, part of it was because I wasnt financially able to stand on my own> The answer is I still can't move on

[NyLyM_nAyR]

@sis gab54 : sabe nya super love nya daw eh..sinabihan ko naman siya na wag niya ng gawin sa iba yung ginawa niya saken...

[Uhlee]

I want to know what did you do after you discovered that he cheated on you and what did you do to move on?

- Away to the max, I cried and cried and cried and cried until there's no more tears, and all I can do is stare on my wall.. It's excruciating.. I don't want to talk to anyone, i don't want to see anyone. Even my friends and my family... as in affected ang buong baranggay dahil sa dinadala ko.. how did i move on?... Since I have a job, i am forced to get up and show up at work. Friends and family are great help. I am not ashamed to tell them my story, because because i need to release my burden.. my friends are so patient that even if i tell them my story a hundred times they listen.. and they always say talk to him about it.. and so i did..

Is your relationship still ok? Are you still together?
- We're still together, we are better than before.. but then issue of trust is there and it's hard to give back in just a snap..

Do you still feel the pain of what happened?
- Pain will always be there... every time i think of the cheating the pain comes back, and the trust I am building will be shaken again.. this is the hardest part for me..

Do you still trust him after that? what did you do to bring the trust  back?
- after a few months I can trust him again, but not fully.. I still have doubts.. He is working hard to earn my trust back..and that's a plus..

do you still feel that maybe he is still with someone else or still with the old sl*t that broke your trust and faith in him?
- Sometimes i feel that, but i ignore it. Divert my attention to something else and make myself busy.

Share your experiences and thoughts about this....
You have to be strong, don't make him the center of your universe.. Have your friends come over to your house or go out! Make him see that you can live even without him, make yourself more beautiful!

[eimerej5]

quote]

^sis why does hubby need to lie kung nagtetext pa rin yong girl? kainis to huh? Naku I experience this too like many times, thru text ko rin nalalaman...pero after ko mabuking stop na. Nakakalikot ko talaga ang lahat ng features ng phone niya just to 'investigate'...if he had the guts to lie to me by texting pacute stuff sa ibang girls I had to armed myself the guts to act as an investigator/ inspector too.

I share the sentiments with you and passionfruitty,...baka nakakalimutan nila they work peacefully, comfortably kasi alam nilang may magaling na nagaalaga sa mga anak nila who are sometimes under paid and overly neglected. If they want an extremely attractive woman waiting at home, add the family budget thousands of pesos for the twice a week derma, thrice a week gym, organic groceries, costly facial creams etc...

hehe, ewan ko lang di sila mangarag sa kakatrabaho..

Naku sis, is asked him sabi nya kasi baka dw kung ano pa ang isipin ko kapag nabasa ko. sabi ko eh ano ba nalagay sa msg? sabi niya about sa office. sabi ko naman kung wala naman pala at about sa office, why do you need to erase it? mas lalo lang ako nagkakadoubt kapag ganyan ang gawain mo.. nagsorry sabi niya wrong move daw ginawa, hindi na daw niya buburahin pero siympre may mga msg pa din na binubura... hindi ko na lang siya tinanong ulit except nung isang beses then wala na..

Ang pinagtataka ko lang aba, wala ng masyadong msgs sila ha, minsan na lang ang text ay lets eat or lunch time or kain na un na lang.. paano kaya sila naguusap na? sa ym or office extension phones? kasi impossible naman na hindi sila naguusap at saka sabay sabay silang naglulunch dun eh.. din siguro magkasama sila.. hay.... 

[eimerej5]

   The pain is still there after two years! sobrang sakit coz I trusted him fully then magagawa nya pala ito. I cried and cried and I even tried comiting suicide infront of him and my kids. Ilang ulit kong tinanong and ilang ulit din nyang dineny, huhu.
   marami akong giniveup for him tpos gnito. Kung may work pa din sana ako, alis talaga ako sa amin with my kids! We're still together pero I cant trust him na. Pagkagaling sa work everyday, di na mawawala ang duda ko sa kanya. So parang di pa ako makamove on. I love him thats why we're still together though honestly, part of it was because I wasnt financially able to stand on my own> The answer is I still can't move on

sis, ang hirap talaga ano.. i think kahit na ilang yrs pa ang lumipas we can never forget what happened... And ang mahirap din is kung wala nga tayo work at financially dependent sa husband natin.. kaya dapat talaga may sariling income ang babae... kung pede ka mgwork do it girl,, kaya mo yan...

[redlane]

Yes I believe too in self-empowerment. This will make us  feel and act more confident, na when husbands feel this nate-threaten sila.

@Sis eiremej5- tama rin sis na di mo na inuulit-ulit tanungin siya, para mafeel ni hubby na may sense of pride ka rin na hindi maya't maya mo siyang bantayan at uriratin. Just keep your eyes open, pasimple lang  . Kainis noh? bat di nila ma-gets na no is no, enough is enough, pag stop- stop na talaga. 

[honey_iya]

^naku sis talagang concern pa siya dun sa officemate niya keysa sa nararamdaman mo that time?! ano ba explanation ng bf mo sa iyo? wala daw sila relasyon? at nung sinabing wala naniwala ka naman? hahaha.

anyway,kayo parin naman pero ingat lang sis posibleng maulit 'yan

[redlane]

^^Girl, there is/was something and you're too inlove to admit and open your eyes. The girl was an officemate. What kind of  guy in his right mind would let the his beloved gf go malling alone samantalang nagkita na kayo dun tapos he admitted nagkasabay lang sila?

I guess he finds you too naive and he thinks he can get away being caught two timing.

I piece of advice and you can go hate me for this: DO NOT MARRY HIM.

Too thick face to lie to you straight in your face. Disrespectful crap of a man. Sorry huh?.

[guilleanne]

@ sis hisana

Bad News: there's definitely something. kasi the girl was more important to him than you. And sabi mo nga ang special naman nun at pinag buhat pa nya ng shopping bags an hindi nya ginagawa for you. Mag bf pa lang kayo ganyan na sya, hindi kana nya priority? at gaano na lang katanga yung officemate nya para hindi maka balik sa office mag isa? bulag ba yun? hindi marunong mag taxi? napaka lame naman na excuse yun para iwan ka eh you're crying and all na nga. super insensitive naman nya sayo...

Good News: You're not married to him.

[destiny_27]

^^Girl, there is/was something and you're too inlove to admit and open your eyes. The girl was an officemate. What kind of  guy in his right mind would let the his beloved gf go malling alone samantalang nagkita na kayo dun tapos he admitted nagkasabay lang sila?

i agree with you sis.

question sis hisana, did you demand for a further explanation about that incident? kc you said that was long time ago na and right now you're still together.. hindi na ba ngyari ulit yun?

[anne08]

After discovering that he cheated on me, I tried my best to work on the marriage.  We were newly weds during that time ... barely 2 months ... and so I was still very eager to fix whatever was broken.  But then I got tired din, kasi I felt that I was the only one working on the marriage. 

How did I move on ... I was able to move on only after I separated from him.  And now we are ok, he is now my ex husband since we decided to get a divorce.  We are civil to each other, at least we don't fight anymore. 

[euwie]

@ hisana: hiwalayan mo na yan.... tama bang ganon trato nya sa yo? isipin mo, ngayon pa lang na mag bf-gf kayo, nagawa nyang pahiyain ka sa harap ng maraming tao and worse sa suspected other woman nya. isipin mo na lang, pano kapag mag asawa na kayo. hahayaan mo na lang ba na ganon ganon na lang na walang respeto bf mo sa yo? kung ako yan, goodbye forever na yan. 

kami naman ni hubby, most of the time, ok kami. lagi ko pa rin naiisip pero isipin ko man paulit ulit wala ng mangyayari, binabadtrip ko lang sarili ko. finally naiyak ko na rin yung matagal ko ng kinikimkim na pain. as in super mega nagwala ako. haha! mas ok yung ganon. normal yata talaga yung ganito. kapag naaalala ko, sinasabi ko sa asawa ko. mas ok yung ganon na alam nya, at least mas nagiging sensitive sya at careful sa actions nya. pero mabait naman asawa ko, nakikita ko na talagang mega effort sya. 1 year 3 months na nakalipas simula nung nalaman ko pero consistent pa rin sya towards me, mega effort pa rin sya na pasayahin ako. 

[feisty_angel4]

@ Sis Hissana: Please do not allow yourself to be disrespected. He is not worthy of you. No man who truly loves you would leave you there. And to top it all, he seemed not to mind your feelings. Please do not marry him.

[kiz_me1109]

I'll cross my finger and wish na sana hindi talaga mangyari sakin to. Because if this happens, aalis nalang ako bigla sa house ng in laws ko with my son and uuwi bigla ng province. Mag i immediate resignation ako from work. Hindi na ako magtatanong... iiwan ko na siya. hehe

[mstina]

Nafi-feel ko na na medyo cold na husband ko. So when I discovered that he cheated, it confirmed everything. I was devastated. Nag-effort naman siya to win me back but I thought it wasn't enough.

After a month of trying (with constant arguments in between), he told me Hindi niya na ko mahal. Dahil ayokong maghiwalay kami, I begged him to stay (not because I'm financially dependent on him but because I still love him). Pumayag naman siya and he told me nasabi niya Lang daw yon kasi masama loob niya sa akin. Sadly, yon ang naging cycle ng relationship namin. With us fighting, him telling me he doesn't love me anymore and me begging him to stay.

Finally, i mustered the guts to talk to him ng masinsinan nung ok kami. Because I still felt his coldness. And inamin niya nga na Hindi niya na ako mahal. so nagalit ako kasi niloloko niya Lang pala ako all along. Why not tell me from the start na Hindi niya na ko mahal para di nalang ako nag make ng effort to save the relationship.

So I kicked him out of our house and demanded he gives monthly child support or else, I'll sue him for abandonment. Malungkot pero I had to do it. Mahirap pala pag 1 nailing sa inyo nage-effort to make the relationship work, kawawa ka Lang. Might as well let go...

[Ms karla]

kadalasan office affairs talaga ang case.

Ako, pina resign ko asawa ko, kasi i cant bear the fact na mag kikita sila everyday sa company. He ventured for another work.

I understand innate sa ating mga babae ang martyr. Pero naman, tinanggap mo un husband mo ulit because he was sorry. So he have to live sa patakaran natin

Girls, who run the world? It is us.