Pseudo Relationship --> POV's nyo about this girls :)

[glamorosa_09]

^korek sis

girls naman madalas talo dyan... they're more emotional than men...

[thingamajig]

I was in this kind of relationship before. We were friends since HS, and although we didn't see each other much during our college days, the communication was always there.

Last Nov 2009, we had lunch with our other friends. Then after that reunion, I asked him if he would like to have a casual relationship with me. (I wanted "kilig" and fun without the commitment coz I was moving on from a two-year unrequited love with another man) He agreed. I set some rules like: no-strings attached, we could date other persons, no too much intimacies (i.e. we'll just hug and kiss), and we will not fall in love with each other.

At first it was just dates, and stuff, I didn't really care for him, I just wanted to feel that there's someone I could talk to, someone I could date, etc. Then after that, I began to fall in love. I tried to fight it at first, until I accepted the fact that I've already fallen for him.

The great thing is: he has also fallen for me.

So now, after being friends since HS, and having a nine-month casual relationship, we are now a couple. 

[minikeyklush]

The great thing is: he has also fallen for me.

So now, after being friends since HS, and having a nine-month casual relationship, we are now a couple. 

@sis thingamajig (^^,) you are so lucky hehe at least nagend yan ng maganda and okay ang result for both of u

hays sis kakainggit ka hehe 

[cherub.rock]

damn.. i think i'm in this kind of relationship. i don't know where i stand in his life. basically, i feel like a MEANTIME GIRL.

[rychel07]

hindi ko na natapos basahin haha. I'm not built for this kind of relationship, kasi sabi ko sa gf ko ngayun nung una, MU lang kami, until naging kami rin. Nadevelop ako. haha.

[_ariadne_]

I think its normal to go through this type of relationship. You aren't in the typical Filipino courtship where the guy is the one who confesses his love/intentions first. I think this type is better because both of you are getting to know each other and seeing where it would lead you.

Para sa akin, walang talo . So what kung mauna ma-in-love ang babae? This will test your patience to wait for him. Hindi naman karera ang love. Kung umabot na ng ilang buwan at hindi ka pa din mahal nung lalaki na ka-MU mo, edi mag move on. There are plenty of fishes in the sea!  It would be his loss, not yours.

[budgirl]

i think in this kind of set-up, chances are very slim that it ends up happily. this i base from personal experience and from what i hear from other people. don't get me wrong ha, i have experienced this too, a couple of times.

kaya nga "pseudo" eh. look up the definition of the word:
1. not actually but having the appearance of; pretended; false or spurious; sham
2. almost, approaching, or trying to be

meaning, it's not there. no matter how real the feelings involved are, there's still no commitment involved. and there are various reasons why it is such.

i have involved myself in this pseudo-relationship almost as long as it took me to finish my formal education (6 years elementary + 4 years high school + 4 years college = 14 years). i was involved in this pseudo relationship for 12 years! so imagine, more than a decade of being in limbo on a regular basis. he was my first love. he strung me along for the longest time, even if he was never "available" all those years. laging may girlfriend. magpapalit pero hindi ako yung ipapalit. o diba, k*tangahan to the nth level??

maybe i was also getting my "fix" then, that's why i stayed. he was like a drug to me; gets me "high" every time that's why i couldnt just leave. the more elusive he was, the more obsessive i became. nakaka-adik naman talaga na alam mong malapit mo nang makuha yung isang bagay. so you keep on pushing. wishfully thinking, magbabago din. na one day, mapapasayo din. took me what, 12 years to realize that's not gonna happen. kasi kung gusto ka talaga, gusto ka talaga. ganon kasimple. hindi mong kailangang manghula sa actions o sa sinasabi, kasi didiretsuhin nya. he wont waste a day with the thought you're not his.

i am happy now. with a different guy. alam ko na kung saan ako nakatayo. hindi na in limbo; steady na.

i have finally reached my saturation point. thank God.

[ylisza]

i've in this kind of relationship before, sobrang bata ko pa noon.. i was 14.. siguro hindi counted yon.. i don't know.. pero parang ganon e..

kase the guy was like super "artista" and he was worshiped by all girls when we were young.. pag nagkikita kami, parang kami.. pero wala lang.. may girlfriend sya pero hindi namin pinag uusapan yon pag kami lang dalawa.. kelan pa yon noh? nung unang panahon pa.. grabe.. 30 na ako.. pag iniisip ko yon, nakakatuwa lang.. at least ngayon may tawag pala sa ganon..

hindi naman masama for me.. kase nag agree naman kayo pareho na ganun ang set up.. kung masaktan ka, e di kasalanan mo na yon.. hindi nga kayo e..

[sweetsorrow]

my pseudo guy before turned out to be my future husband... nabuntis kasi ako.. but pinanindigan naman niya.. happy kami ngayon

[cherub.rock]

^buti ka pa sis.

ako naman, i never thought i'd be invloved in this kind of relationship. but surprise, surprise... i am. ito na siguro ang karma ko. i've had steady and serious bfs before. my last bf, i broke up with bec. i felt suffocated and i messed around with this guy i am sort of having a pseudo relationship with. ang hirap pala. nasanay kasi ako sa committed and serious relationships wherein my (ex)bfs really prioritize and care for me, yung alam ko talaga na ako lang and mahal ako. but now, with my current situation, i don't know where i stand.

contrary to most experiences here in GT where they had to go thru bad relationships before they finally found the right one, baliktad naman sa akin. i had really good relationships before but threw it out the window bec. i wanted something more. now look where i am.. single and in a pseudo relationship with someone who doesn't give a sh*t. oh diba? ang saya. worse is, i think i am falling in love though i am trying my hardest to contain my feelings with myself. hindi ako ang tipong babae na naghahabol ng lalake or ipagpilitan ang sarili ko sa taong ayoko sa akin. for the first time, i have tried what it's like not to be wanted sooo bad. i guess that's the 'thrill' in my situation--i find it more challenging. then again, as what i've said, ang hirap pala. i don't know where i stand in his life and thinking about it, it has become more clear to me that i am the girl he is with for the meantime while he waits for 'the one' in his life. oh well.

but surprisingly, i have no regrets. somehow i am still thankful i have gone through this experience. may it be my karma or whatever, i'm still happy with my life right now. i've gained another story to tell.

[urworstenemi]

oo nga mahirap kasi ang feeling kung tutuo na o hindi p yung nararamdaman mo.

[mooncake and leaves]

^^ that's not karma. a lot of women go through relationships like that. consider it a process that makes growing up more interesting. i pray na matauhan ka, though haha asap.

[cherub.rock]

^haha oo nga sis. sana matauhan na ako. haaay. just can't resist it. sabi ko sa sarili ko na stop na.. huwag na magreply when he texts or call, or tell him straight out na ayoko na. but everytime magparamdam yung tao, naku..i suddenly blow my rationality. haaay grabe so many mixed feelings.  i feel inspired, insecure, happy, lonely, elated, worried, delighted, uneasy, fearless but still so scared. all the ironies. all the good and bad. kasi nga diba, the feelings are real, the relationship is not. i oftentimes ask myself why ipagpatuloy pa if wala naman talaga patutunguhan? i know we'll never work out even if it was a real relationship. i know his weaknesses too well and i couldn't bring myself to trust him.  it is fun...no question about that. but i know for sure that at some point, this has to end. the thought scares me and liberates me as well. parang ayoko matapos but it's for my own good na rin. ironic talaga, diba?

i've loved my ex bfs but i haven't tried na grabe ang iyak during break-up, yung talagang ramdam na ramdam ang sakit.  in fact, i've moved on so easily. akala ko nga bato kaya siguro itong puso ko na parang ang numb ko even if i really cared and loved my last bf so much. siguro ito magpapaiyak ng todo2x sa akin. huwag naman sana. bakit pa nga kasi sinimulan eh.

sis mooncake, it did make life more interesting, but yun nga, ansakit din.  hehe. masakit na masarap. hahaha!!! just kidding. seriously sis, i pray din na mag move on from this phase of my life. i may be enjoying it now but for sure i am bound for heartbreak.

[krnmprl]

i was about to get into something like this, and then i stopped.

just stopped completely. ang sabi nga ng lola ko, wag kang kukuha ng batong ipupukpok sa ulo mo.

[lesters_gal]

my pseudo relationship ended last january.it was mutual decision...kasi parang things are not right anymore..im dating him and my ex at the same time...then my expectation na sa part ko which i know is wrong..we have fights na rin....at first i thought i was inlove na with him. pero nung naghiwalay na kami i realized na its all infatuation lang lahat ng nararamdaman ko... akala ko i will cry a river kasi wala na kami,,, pero hindi pala...ive moved on easily..no sleepless nights..walang emote moments...

i just enjoyed his company..i enjoyed being taken out...yun lang...LOL.... but he will always be part of me...one of my adventures in my life.... kasi first time ko na pumasok sa ganitong set up.and first time ko pumatol sa mas matanda sa akin.. NO REGRETS....

[muahmuahmuah]

It is what it is. Even if relationships have to start somewhere a set up like this becomes difficult and nasty if you give more than what you’re getting. Make it an even game and consider your options and see who else is out there. It’s a good opportunity to discover yourself and what you are looking for in a mate, after all, pseudo is what already defines him so there’s really nothing to expect from him especially in the relationship.  If you can’t walk the talk and you know you are already in one, be ahead of the game and run away fast and channel Beyonce 'If you like it then you should've put a ring on it.'

[thingamajig]

@sis thingamajig (^^,) you are so lucky hehe at least nagend yan ng maganda and okay ang result for both of u

hays sis kakainggit ka hehe 

naku sis, sorry naman sa late reply. anyway, thanks! maganda nga ang naging result nung casual relationship namin, but i think it's also because of the solid friendship din na meron kami before we got into that kind of relationship. up to now, kami pa rin. maraming ups and downs, but we're really happy.

[minikeyklush]

@sis thingamajig, okay lang hehe.. im just hoping and praying that my right time would come in terms of being into a real and serious relationship hehe 

[isobel]

i have friends who started out this way. we didn't know each other pa at that time, though, so i can't really tell how it was with them. all i know is that eventually, they fell in love and graduated to having a real, committed relationship. now they're married.

[cai2179]

i was in this set-up few weeks ago. i dumped him because i was afraid we were becoming a couple na. parang ako lang yata may positive feedback sa ganitong relationship ah.