PAANO NAMAN NAPAPA ALAM NG HUSBAND MO SAMA NG LOOB NYA SA YO?

[aquacharly]

Okay, we have been discussing for some time the ways and means we convey to our husbands our "sama ng loob".

How does your husband convey his "sama ng loob"/disappointment/anger/irritation to you naman?

You have the same style?  Different?

Mine keeps quiet, very very very quiet.... and talks to me, or responds to me, in a very formal way.  So, I get the "loud" hint and inquire what is bugging him? 
BUT if mainit ang ulo ko, I let it go and let him be.  It does not pay to go head on with someone when my emotions are likely to over rule my better judgment.

Nowadays, we have the same style.  Before, we also had the same loud, confrontational style with embellishments of cursing and banging doors.  hehe  What can I say but we have matured and learned our lessons.  Bow.

[evilwoman]

dissappointment/anger/irritation - he would usually snap at me which i really hate kasi wala syang pinipiling oras and lugar. que maysakit ka or kakagaling mo pa lang sa hospital from giving birth or may kaharap kaming ibang tao, basta mainis sya, di talaga mapigil ang bibig.haaay.. nakakahiya..

sama ng loob - there was a time na i was crying due to frustration na bigla nya isiningit na "alam mo ba when you're doing this/that, sumasama ang loob ko sa yo?". kung di lang sobrang masama ang loob ko that time, baka nasagot ko sya ng husband, moment ko to.. wag ka makiagaw ng spotlight.. 

[honey_iya]

Eto ang mahirap kasi di sila vocal like us. masama na pala loob di pa natin alam like sa asawa ko ayaw nya pala ng pinapakialam ko phone nya kasi di naman din daw nya pinapakialaman phone ko. although wala naman daw syang tinatago,parang wala daw kasing tiwala kapag ganun. nalaman ko nalang na ayaw nya kasi one time tinanong ko kung di ba siya naiinis sa ugali ko,maldita kasi ako ang sagot niya hindi daw kasi mabait siya hahaha. pero nung tinanong ko about sa cp ayun nga pero ok lang daw kahit pakialaman ko,labo!

[primr0se]

My hubby is really the quiet type, and super haba ng pasensya ng taong yun. It's hard to know if he's feeling something bad or if he's holding grudges, kasi he rarely talks about it.

But recently, after a very huge fight, we talked as in talked about our issues. I went first, and I told him na I don't know how to talk to him pag may problema siya, and it's  hard coz I'm his wife and i want to comfort him. Kung may nagagawa ako na hindi niya gusto, I need to change that lalo na if it's for the better.

Somehow napapayag ko siya magsalita, and turned out medyo marami narin pala siyang sama ng loob. After that disclosure, we promised na sa susunod na may ganung issues, sabi na agad kasi walang magagawa kung pareho kaming tatahimik nalang.

So far so good, even the little things nabibigyan na ng attention. Konting sanayan lang. Hehe!

[kettlekorn28]

If he's disappointed/angry but doesn't want to argue (tapos ako dakdak ng dakdak ), titingin lang yan sa akin ng matalim. Pag patuloy pa rin ako sa pagdakdak, tatalikuran na nya ako.

Pag naman maraming kaharap na tao, quiet lang sya, as in super quiet which is mapapansin agad ng mga taong kasama namin. Very outspoken kasi si hubby, palabiro...kaya pag tumahimik ibig-sabihin may problem. Di naman nya ako sinisigawan. Ayaw nya kasing lumaki ang usapin. Ako lang ang mahilig magpalaki ng away.

[honey-ecclaire]

super hindi nya ako kinakausap..sasabihin lang nya tama na..ayun galit na yun...tapos tatahimik na ako,si hubby kase lahat gustong pagusapan kaya pagtumahmik na yun..tahimik na dapat ko after a while magsasalita na din yun..and we will start talking about the problem...

[lyn]

I can always tell when my hubby is having sama ng loob sakin. Or he has something on his mind. He says I'm a mind reader. Ha ha Kahit noon di pa kami kasal, bf/gf lang, at kahit LDR. I can tell if he is upset in his emails. And I always confront him about it, like I ask him: you're mad at me aren't you? I can tell just by the tone of the email or his voice on the phone. I'm always right, kahit sa labas ng smile cya. I know....

It's like I'm in tune to him. I could "feel" his mind buzzing with thoughts. And when I ask him, sometimes he says nothing but when I tell him I know you're mind is working overtime and said to spit it out. Then he explains to me. And we'll have our "talk".

He said I'm very good daw. Other times if I'm not in the mood, I'll let him be. Pag okay na ko, yan lang time na I'll let him express his feelings. Tahimik yung hubby ko, yan ang normal nya. But mafe-feel ko lang pag iba na yung tahimik nya, like I said, it's like I can feel the buzzing of his mind. Now, when I feel that buzz, I'll ask him directly you want to talk? He knows I felt it. Sinasabihan ko cya kailangan ma express nya yun kasi pag hindi baka ma heart attack lang cya sa pagtitimpi especially na tahimik na cya palagi.

[chengkii]

Iiyak siya pag frustrated na siya sa akin. LOL

But seriously...hubby really pulls me aside and talks to me about what's bothering him. He's very open and vocal. Baliktad kami. AKo iyun nagsa silent treatment. 

[twelvth_goddess]

My hubby doesn't talk a lot but when he gets on it, lahat naman nasasabe nya. He's not as expressive as I am kaya I know he's naiinis if I talk and he doesnt talk back or super tipid ng mga sagot nya.

[spicyangel]

he doesnt talk. whatever it is na kinakainis nya sakin, wala ko idea ano yun. kase never sha nag salita tungkol sa ugali ko na ayaw nya. sa friends nya sinasabi siguro. kase may isang pakialamerang friend nya na nagsabi sakin na inis daw sakin ang asawa ko dahil selosa daw ako at dudera, at di daw ako naniniwalang mahal nya ko. well,im not sure if totoong sinabi ng asawa ko yun.

[officebusters]

At first tahimik muna sya, pero kapag kaya n nya magsalita mag-uusap kming 2 and lahat sasabihin nya kung ano [textspeak!] issue. i know kpag ganun na sya tumatahimik [textspeak!] ako para walang argumento. its a matter of give and take lang yan.

[chrlxmyot]

^mine's not expressive, eh kahit nag-aaway na nga kami ako pa nagsasabi sa kanya na "oh, ipagtanggol mo naman sarili mo! sabihin mo gusto mo sabihin!" pero wala pa din wala daw sya sasabihin sa akin...pero i knew there were a lot of things he wanted to tell me kaya lang lagi niya sinasabi na hahaba lang daw kasi pag nagsalita siya..so ayun, hindi niya sinasabi mga sama ng loob niya sa akin...

[sxymnky]

tinatakot ako hahaha
parang multo 

[kreez]

ako parang si sis lyn, i can always tell when hubby is upset or has something on his mind, just by the way he talks or even in his email, just the way he writes them, kahit nga hindi sya magsalita, then I would tell him what's bugging you, your aura looks murky (private joke)" tapos magssmile na sya then kukulitin ko pa rin kung ano problem nya....

[queenie06]

asawa ko rin tahimik na tahimik..hindi umiimik kahit kausapin mo.pag tinanong naman kong ano problema nya sasabihin hwag daw muna xang pakausap.tapos after an hour pag tinanong mo ulit sasabihin na bakit masama ang loob

[lyn]

^yup. I tell my hubby that too. He he "Your aura is different. What's on your mind?"

[rsc_ricci]

dissappointment/anger/irritation - he would usually snap at me which i really hate kasi wala syang pinipiling oras and lugar. que maysakit ka or kakagaling mo pa lang sa hospital from giving birth or may kaharap kaming ibang tao, basta mainis sya, di talaga mapigil ang bibig.haaay.. nakakahiya..

sama ng loob - there was a time na i was crying due to frustration na bigla nya isiningit na "alam mo ba when you're doing this/that, sumasama ang loob ko sa yo?". kung di lang sobrang masama ang loob ko that time, baka nasagot ko sya ng husband, moment ko to.. wag ka makiagaw ng spotlight.. 

Natawa nman ako rito kc pareho sa isasagot ko dapat. Although after venting out, minutes lang, me and my hubby can laugh about any issue. I even had my hubby read this comment and ang sagot niya lang, hehe"...nkarelate kasi

[candy_tone]

he's very vocal and he cites reasons why he's angry with me sometimes it's good to vent pero bigla na lang kasi siya minsan out of the blue if i said something he didnt like he'd be in a bad mood and he would storm out of the house if i sense that he's angry i just keep quiet. Usually it's me who makes lambing and we'd forget all bout it the next day.

[mami violy]

dati si hubby yung masyadong vocal as in super vocal ako talaga eh tahimik lang lahat kasi pinipilit kong intindihin at unawain sya kung bakit sya nagagalit sakin at hihingi na lang ako ng sorry at kung bakit di ko puedeng gawin yung bagay na yun.
pero ngayon di ko na kilala ang asawa ko, minsan kapag inis sya pinapakita nya gaya ng dati may time naman na tahimik at deadma lang sya, may moment naman na ayaw nya akong kausap kahit anong tanong ko sa kanya kung may prob ba?

[suikorayne]

tahimik lang siya. he will not talk to me tipong ganon. taz pag umalis kami.. super bilis mag drive!
yun, alam ko na yun....