Baby na o wag muna??

[runaway_bridesmaid]

^yeah sis, it's true na talagang masaya pag may baby, at di naman talaga kelangan na super dami ka ng pera at mayaman na para mag baby. but for me it's unfair na pag walang baby wala rin direction ang marriage ng mag asawa kasi di naman lahat ng couples may capacity na magka baby. kami ng hubby ko di naman namin choice na wala kaming anak, syempre gusto namin, gustong gusto! kaya lang since wala kaming magawa dahil di pa binibigay ng Diyos, enjoy na lang muna kung ano ang meron kami ngayon.

nakakasakit lang talaga ng loob yung sinasabihan ka ng ibang tao na "hindi kayo magiging masaya dahil wala kayong anak" syempre ang dating parang sinusumpa kami na para bang ayaw nila kaming maging happy as a couple. though meron talagang mga  couple na by choice ang pagiging childless nila, di pa rin tama sa tingin ko na hatulan sila na di pwede maging masaya.
 

[vuzhia]

just got married August last year, pero feeling ko lahat ng kakilala namin inip nah...haiz, before getting married napag-usapan na namin ni hubby na hindi nga muna kami mag baby, usapan namin this year, pero nagbago lahat...

we decided na kumuha muna kami ng sarili naming house, pareho kase kami ni hubby na ayaw naming aasa sa parents namin

we do the math at hindi talaga kakayanin ng salary namin na mag baby kami ngayun dahil sa hinuhulugan naming down payment ng house namin...

kami naman ni hubby napag-usapan na namin ng maayos yun, na hindi talaga namin kaya mag-baby pa muna, plan nya nga maghanap nga bagong job na medyo malaki ang salary

nakakainis lang talaga yung mga mangungulit na todo explain pa sa amin na keso mahirap pag umedad na, keso yung iba daw gusto mag-ka baby tapos nahihirapan...

kaya pag may nagtatanong sa akin ang sagot ko lang wala pang pang-gatas, pero si hubby ayaw nya ng reason na yun, kase nga naman sya yung mapupulaan pag ganun, kase nga iisipin ng ibang tao, hindi nya kayang makabuhay ng pamilya...haiz kainis lang talaga, alangan namang pilitin naming mag baby tapos wala kami papakain, eh di kawawa naman yung bata...

[iristacey]

^same situation sis, at least ngayon tapos na kame ng DP but now, kotse naman ang tinitingnan ni hubby kaya looks like madedelay ang baby. depende din, basta ayaw naman namin na magbaby tapos hindi rin naman magiging sapat yung income namin to support lahat ng financial needs namin.

[liyapot]

kami meron na..
ganyan din ang plans namin ni hubby..to wait....kasi may plans kami na mag migrate to canada..dapat nga this year nasa canada na kami eh.. kaso early last year nabuntis ako..(na-pressure na si hubby kasi 1 yr na kasi kaming kasal and [textspeak!] apa kaming baby) so on hold na muna yung plans we're going to wait na maging 2 to 3 yrs old na yung baby namin bago kami mag-process ..para tamang pag-approve ng papers namin medyo malaki na anak namin

[artegirl]

^yeah sis, it's true na talagang masaya pag may baby, at di naman talaga kelangan na super dami ka ng pera at mayaman na para mag baby. but for me it's unfair na pag walang baby wala rin direction ang marriage ng mag asawa kasi di naman lahat ng couples may capacity na magka baby. kami ng hubby ko di naman namin choice na wala kaming anak, syempre gusto namin, gustong gusto! kaya lang since wala kaming magawa dahil di pa binibigay ng Diyos, enjoy na lang muna kung ano ang meron kami ngayon.

nakakasakit lang talaga ng loob yung sinasabihan ka ng ibang tao na "hindi kayo magiging masaya dahil wala kayong anak" syempre ang dating parang sinusumpa kami na para bang ayaw nila kaming maging happy as a couple. though meron talagang mga  couple na by choice ang pagiging childless nila, di pa rin tama sa tingin ko na hatulan sila na di pwede maging masaya.
 

sis, pag sinabihan ka ng "hindi kayo magiging masaya dahil wala kayong anak", ask them bakit ang daming kids na from broken families.  having kids doesn't guarantee a successful family life.

I agree masaya pag may baby.  pero it's 1 thing to just simply enjoy the company of a child.  It's a totally different matter to take on the responsibility of bringing up a child. 

[clueless]

married 5 years and no kids din.

we also get asked that question a lot. our families, relatives and close friends know better now. they don't ask anymore. nung una kasi we would give the "right" answers pa - what they wanted to hear, polite answers, mga ganon. but ever since we started telling them that we are childless by choice, they stopped asking. at least they respect our choice.

but there are some people who keep on "justifying" the "need" to have kids. iba daw ang feeling, seeing your baby smile at you makes everything worth it, na we're only saying now we don't want kids because we don't what it feels like to be parents, our outlook will change once we finally have a kid etc etc. ang nakakainis, these are people who are not even close to us. nakikialam. why can't they just respect the choice? i respect your choice to have kids, respect my choice not to. ganon lang dapat ka-simple yon.

i just found out a few days ago that i'm pregnant. we were childless by choice and now i'm pregnant not by choice. if it were up to me lang, i don't want kids talaga but i always said pag meron eh di meron, pag wala eh di wala. so ayan, ngayon meron.

my husband is happier about it than me. i don't know, i have mixed emotions. i know i should be happy and i should celebrate this blessing but there is also fear. i could never picture myself being a mom and now that i am pregnant, i keep on trying to imagine how i would be as a mom and hindi ko pa din fully ma-grasp yung idea na magiging nanay na ako.

when i first suspected i was pregnant, nagbilang ako agad kung kelan and expected delivery ko. nov-dec, tama ang bilang ko. ang unang pumasok sa utak ko, my expat boss is leaving at the end of the year for a new assignment. mahirap mag handover kasi naka maternity leave na ako sa last month niya tapos naka maternity leave pa din ako sa 1st month na wala siya. impact sa work kaagad ang naisip ko, hindi kung anong magiging buhay ko pag mommy na ako. 

i'm scared but i'm trying to cope.

[boaVista]

hays ganyan din dito sa amin. we been married for 3years na. naawa ako kay hubby kasi sha yong napipikon sa biro ng mga kasama nya sa work like "gandang lahi mo sana kaso hindi ka magka anak" "subukan mo kaya sa iba baka magka anak ka" (p**** i*** talaga na bad trip ako nugn narinig ko ito) "tubig yata yang nalabas sa yo eh"

then yong relatives naman ni hubby sinasabi sa akin " baog ka yata" "hindi talaga ikaw magkakaanak kasi masama ugali mo" (im not close to them) ang sagot ko naman "kung masama ugali ko matagal na akong iniwan ng asawa ko, eh bakit hindi umuuwi  sa bahay nyo kung masama ugali ko?, then pag me nagsasabing ibang tao "bat hindi ka pa magka anak?" sagot ko lang "sagot mo ba gatas unti 5yrs old?"


nakakairita, nakakapressure sa asawa ko and ang tendency na depress sha. sabi ko sa kanya wag kang makinig sa ibang tao dahil hindi naman sila ang nagdadala ng buhay natin. kung hindi tayo magka baby we'll travel na lang, spend natin ang buhay natin na maayos at hindi kagaya ng iba na may anak nga pero hirap sa buhay.

hays pinoy nga naman lahat pinapakialaman.

[krisle703]

^^congratulations sis..
don't worry it's normal to feel that way.. all your fears will subside din once lumalaki na si baby sa tummy mo.. count more 15 months pa.. then post ka again dito.. maybe then you'll get your own perspective about being a parent.. ready or not..

[piglet24]

we got married last january. and plans namn is until august. para namn makabawi sa expenses ng kasal and makapagipon ng konti for the baby.

[fashion_addict]

pag ako naman kinasal, napagusapan namin ng fiance ko na 1 or 2 years before i conceive.

[yang]

im really glad to have come by in this thread. well, for us it started right after we got married and have a home. that time i understand and even get excited with the anticipation of a baby.  but things happened for reasons beyond me that i couldnt get pregnant now. and its just sad,..rightnow, it has been 2 years everytime were in a socials few people weren't sensitive enough and still give their unsolicited blah blah.

[babydust08]

hay naku mga sisses,nakakairita [textspeak!] yung mga taong ganyan..sobrang insensitive nila na ndi naiisip na bka maka offend sila db..me and my hubby is married for 2 yrs at sa 2yrs na yun wala na akong narinig kundi itanong kung nakabuo nb or whatsover,kahit matatanda masyado intrigera nakakainis na!actually gusto nnmin magkababy kaso pano wal pa [textspeak!],nagpapa alaga an ko sa ob lahat na kaso ndi pa [textspeak!] sya binigigay smen and kahit pano [textspeak!] happy [textspeak!] kami ni hubby na kami lang muna,we'll jsut [textspeak!] kung kelan [textspeak!] sya ibigay db.
ang nakakainis pa na part,nagbuntis yung gf ng brother in law ko,natural na issue nnmn yun kc nga naunahan nnmn kami daw..gusto k nga sbihin na at least kami prepared kami nung nagpakasal  tumulong muna sa family kesa namn yun na walang inisip kundi magpakasaya lang db! minsan tlaga magiging bad ka [textspeak!] kahit ayaw mo.

[kreez]

oo nga bakit ganon, before kami ikasal ni hubby (that was almost 4 years ago and I was 25 and hubby was 27) ang tanong sa amin buntis ka? tapos after a year na hindi pa kami nag kakaanak bakit daw ang tagal namin magkaanak... what!

from the start hubby and I decided na mag enjoy muna kami, we travelled quite often on the first three years of our marriage and then we decided its time for a baby so now our baby is 6 months old na. 

pero even before pag napag uusapan lagi sakin sinasabi ni hubby na pag bibigyan tayo ng baby then its a bonus but pag wala we're still complete, happy and contented.   

[kusinera311]

sa case ko naman mga sis almost two years na kmi married ni hubby still wala pa din kaming baby.. few months ago hubby was diagnosed as diabetic so affected na din ang fertility niya..plus im a chubby so hindi talaga ganun kadali samin.may family never pressure us namanto have a baby.may ilan lang na mga kapitbahay who use to send me a message sa facebook just to ask if may baby na ko..napaka simple they know na i love photos so for sure if im preggy i have the photos everyday in facebook pati yung positive P.T. kaso nga wala eh so ano gusto nila gawin namin..

second thing naawa ako sa parents ko kasi nakikiapo sila ng apo ng may apo na which is im married eh hindi ko sila mabigyan.my mom will even buy apples para sa apo sa mga kapatid niya.my mom knows na hindi pa kmi nagbababy kasi may mga priority pa kmi.but once she asked me na bigyan lang siya ng apo sagot niya hospital bill,vitamins check up etc pati gatas and centralize aircon sa bahay kung ang iniisip nmin is yung gastos.we are trying pero wala talaga eh

[seduce_me]

I'm married for two years now, and wala pang baby. But like some of you, pressured din kami ni husband especially after few months pa lang kami kasal. Pero napag-usapan namin ni husband, mga after two years na, or once settled na kami pareho, since marami pa kaming plano sa buhay, like magpa-renovate ng bahay, tours and travel. Ako, I've been so ready to have a baby kahit noon pang bf-gf pa lang kami ng asawa ko. And after getting married, mas lalo akong na-obsessed na magka-baby, I really wanted one na. Last month ultimately nag-expect ako, and I know I should be pregnant, pero wala, I got my period after a week delay. I guess it doesn't work kung ako lang ang ready, parang 'hindi pa' si hubby eh. So right now, I'm completely off of that thought. Kung meron, meron, kung wala, wala. I know we will be blessed in the right time. So enjoy muna mga sis

[kettlekorn28]

^ That's the right attitude sis seduce_me!

Bakit kaya ganun yung ibang tao? Mas sila pa ang nagpipilit na magkababy kami ni hubby. Eh samantalang kami ni hubby cool lang. Kumbaga, kung kelan na lang dumating si baby. Eh hindi naman compulsory ang pagkakaroon ng anak di ba? Wala naman nakalagay sa marriage contract na dapat magkaanak agad ang couple kundi itatakwil sila ng publiko. 

Kami ni-prepare na namin ang sarili for the worst like baka dumating yung point na suko na kami...na ang last resort is to adopt a child. But for now, ine-enjoy na lang muna namin ang isa't isa.

God bless sa lahat ng mga TTC sisters.

[chinnie]

Been married for 5 years at wala pa ring baby. For that 5 years since we got married, hindi ko na mabilang ang mga tanong at comments ng mga taong nakapaligid sa amin. We don't have a child not by choice but due to some fertility issues. There are times that i don't want to attend family gatherings and parties already to avoid annoying questions. For them its like we are abnormal people just because we don't have a child. Good thing, i have a loving and supportive husband... and we feel blessed for having each other. Kung pagkakalooban kami ng Maykapal, isang napakalaking bonus at regalo nalang yun that i will be grateful for forever.

[still_hoping]

@sis chinnie, we are on the same boat, been married for 5 years and yet wala pa rin akong baby.. though I'm glad na nakita ko yung name mo sa kabilang thread na preggy ka na.. hawahan mo naman ako ng pregnancy.. I also have a very supportive husband.. same dialouge, sabi nya.. "pinakasalan kiata dahil mahal kita, yung baby ay bonus na lang".. so touching kaya lalo akong naiyak. Sana talaga makabuo na rin kami this year.

[chinnie]

^sis still_hoping, sana magdilang anghel ka! i'm not yet pregnant, baka yung nabasa mo was during may pregnancy last year na hindi natuloy because i had miscarriage. sana this year will be our luck at magka-baby na tayo. hope motherhood will come our way soon. baby dust to us!

[ebbah]

Wala pa baby 3 years married na. the day that we got married gusto ko na sana mabuntis..kala ko ganun lang kasimple..hirap pla..hehe! tama! sana mabuntis na tayong lahat dito. atleast kahit wala tayong baby we are blessed with wonderful husbands.