Baby na o wag muna??

[sunnysan]

super dami talagang mga insensitive na tao! kami ni hubby 1 year pa lang married and everytime we go to any family reunion, we prepare ourselves to answer the same question about having a baby. tapos pag sinabing wala pa, naaawa ako sa hubby ko kasi hihirit na mahina siya or something. we've been trying naman pero wala pa talaga. nakakainis lang talaga kasi hindi nila naisip na for some of us, hindi naman ganon kadali. hindi naman ako baby factory noh!

[sue323]

^stressful mag attend ng reunion pag ganyan lang maririnig mo. I feel sorry for couples who have to act as if they aren't offended by such nasty remarks from super insensitive people.

[runaway_bridesmaid]

hirap talaga you always have to force a smile kahit buwisit na buwisit kana sa mga taong ganun!

[sue323]

^di kaya ng powers ko yun, iwas na lang ako. 

[lovelymaeve]

hay kanina nga lang while going to office sabi ng neighbor ko : ano wala pa ba? sabi ko la pa po. sabi ba naman..ang bagal nyo!!!! kumusta naman!! hello, 2 mos pa lang kaming kasal. grabeh talaga! 

[hisana]

^di kaya ng powers ko yun, iwas na lang ako. 

Ako rin. No smile, icy stare, irritated reply.

[sue323]

^Dahil sa inis ko, marami na kong relatives and acquaintances na di ko na kinakausap. Pare pareho lang naman ang mga tanong eh.

hay kanina nga lang while going to office sabi ng neighbor ko : ano wala pa ba? sabi ko la pa po. sabi ba naman..ang bagal nyo!!!! kumusta naman!! hello, 2 mos pa lang kaming kasal. grabeh talaga! 

At anong pakialam nya? may mabagal pa syang nalalaman. Ano akala nya sa mga married couples 24/7 gagawa ng anak? Yun lang siguro alam nyang gawin.

[barbieavril]

dapat talaga di mapressure, mas mahirap naman yung mag-anak ng di naman ready.  Yung iba masabi lang na may anak, kahit di naman ready gagawa ng gagawa.  Kaya ayun, yung mga anak ang nagsa-suffer. 

Yung pinsan ko, feeling ko napi-pressure din kasi after magectopic pregnancy months after nila ikasal ng wife nya, di na ulit nakabuo.  Ngayon, 2 years na sila at wala pa baby.

Ako naman, I got preggy bago kaim ikasal ni hubby.  Pero after our baby, ayaw ko na ulit kasi mahirap manganak. =)

[mlee]

ano wala pa ba? sabi ko la pa po. sabi ba naman..ang bagal nyo!!!!

the nerve! ang sakit naman nag pag bati ng kapit bahay mo sis. >:[
ok lang sana eh mag tanong pero kung ang comment naman eh sobrang tactless - talagang nakakapang init ng ulo minsan.

[mycheska]

kami naman we experienced a harsh comment from an immigration officer in NAIA. We've just been married for exactly a year and she asked us if we had kids already. sabi namin wala pa, nag-iipon pa. then she began to smirk and say "para saan pa yung pera nyo kung wala naman kayong anak?"...the nerve of this woman. of course, sanay naman kami sa mga harsh comments but then hindi namin sya kilala kaya wala syang karapatan mag-comment ng ganun.

[sue323]

^arrrgh! That was sooo annoying! As if having kids is the only reason why people should save for the future. Paano naman ang mga sarili natin? Don't we have the right to spend money?

[silverlilac]

i can totally relate to all of you mga sis...almost 1 year na kaming kasal ni hubby, and a few months into our marriage we were already getting irritating questions about bakit hindi pa ako preggy, etc. as in a few months ago, isang tita ko joked na "baka baog ka" - right to my face!    after that i really let the people who ask those questions feel my irritation pag may mga ganung hirit...i even had a breakdown of sorts - i cried and shouted a bit at that same aunt of mine -- i was totally honest with her and said that whenever i hear those "hirits", sobrang nasasaktan kami ni hubby. what's surprising was she never thought her words can hurt, and she was so remorseful after i talked to her. after that, wala nang humihirit from that side of our family, malamang nasabihan na lahat ng tita ko about my outburst

my husband and i are childless for now, by choice...of course we want to have children, but we both agree that now is not the right time. if biglang may mabuo, we would be ecstatic! but right now, we choose to enjoy each other muna talaga. and we both agreed that when we got married, we promised to love and cherish each other til death do us part, not if we don't/can't have children...we loved and married each other without the condition that we HAVE to have children, and we both believe that we, as a couple, are already complete -- the children we will have will just be the biggest gifts and bonuses from God.

i just had a talk with one of my friends, who's in the process of having her marriage annulled, and who gave birth to a still-born angel:( a friend of hers recently gave birth, then sent a message to all of her friends (both married and unmarried), which goes, "ay naku ang sarap magka-anak. mag-baby na din kayong lahat, hindi complete ang buhay ninyo if wala kayong anak!"  though i understand the sheer joy of having the chance to give life to such a precious blessing, i told my friend (who completely agreed with me), that para na ding sinabi ng friend nya na not having children makes one less of a person, na hindi complete ang pagiging babae pag walang anak.

gaya nga ng lagi kong sinasabi sa hubby ko whenever people greet me first with "may baby ka na?" or "buntis ka na ba" instead of "how are YOU?" -- WHEN I GOT MARRIED, DID I CEASE BEING A REAL PERSON AND JUST BECAME AN INSTANT BABY-MAKER, LIKE OTHER PEOPLE SEEM TO ASSUME?!

[mlee]

^arrrgh! That was sooo annoying! As if having kids is the only reason why people should save for the future. Paano naman ang mga sarili natin? Don't we have the right to spend money?

I agree! Actually, yun lang ba dahilan kung bakit nag iipon tayo? Paano naman yung retirement? whether may plano tayo magka anak or wala - kelangan talaga mag ipon. Paano na lang pag tanda natin diba?!

Anong karapatan niya mag comment di naman siya kaano-ano. 

WHEN I GOT MARRIED, DID I CEASE BEING A REAL PERSON AND JUST BECAME AN INSTANT BABY-MAKER, LIKE OTHER PEOPLE SEEM TO ASSUME?!

exactly my thoughts sis!!

[ginangw]

hi everyone....i'm just so glad and relieved to finally be part of a forum like this...it's a  topic that's difficult to be open about with just anyone.....considering maraming tao pa rin talaga ang insensitive!!!!!

my hubby and i have been married for about 10 mos. now...and still without  much success......! the thing is i've got my age working against me...i'm already 35 y.o...and the thought of not having children really scares me...i'm just thankful that i am blessed with a very loving and supportive husband who constantly assures me na...it's not what should define our marriage...but the two of us...!!!!

i hate to admit it but everytime i see women with their kids..or pregnant women i can't help but feel a twinge of envy...i know it's not right....but it's one of those emotions i go through everytime...

i confessed this to a priest na and he did said for me to try and find the beauty and meaning in waiting for God's plan/purpose for me and my hubby....

honestly patience in waiting is something humanly difficult..!!!but what i try to remember na lang was that...first and foremost God has been faithful in his promises to me...He gave me my hubby and he's everything i prayed for....how can i not trust and lean on His faithfulness to me...again....and again?!!!!

till next time....Godspeed to us all.....!

[bluemargarita]

i remember may term sila sa show na Sex and the City for these types of people -- Smug Married.

its been 1 year and 4 mos for us, wala pa si baby. Im thankful my family supports me. they always tell me it will come at the right time. No pressure from my parents or my family. Same is true for my close friends. they dont even ask those things from us. they just let us be. Alam naman nila how me and my hubby are enjoying our time together. bisyo namin ang mag travel.

ang mahilig naman talaga magtanong or pumuna ng mga ganyang bagay yung mga taong walang significance sa buhay natin. random officemates, kapit bahay, faux friends etc. Our true friends know what we are going through and dont even make an issue out of it.

let's not waste our time with these people. im sure they are just saying that so they can feel better about themselves hehe (bad!)

[iristacey]

i feel for those married na hindi agad nagkababy (planned or not). kame almost 2 years na married but plan talaga namin na wala munang baby tutal we're just turning 26. lagi din kame nakakarinig ng comments na 'bakit wala pa', 'mahina naman kayo' etc. hello, planning a baby nowadays entails responsibility so dapat talagang ready din kayo.  so sana wala na lang ganung comments or unsolicited advises di ba? hehe. just my two cents.

[sue323]

ang mahilig naman talaga magtanong or pumuna ng mga ganyang bagay yung mga taong walang significance sa buhay natin. random officemates, kapit bahay, faux friends etc.

True, the insignificant others really know how to ruin our day :-)

[silverlilac]

^i totally agree, that comment of bluemargarita's really, literally hits the spot!

[a_y_e_n]

ang mahilig naman talaga magtanong or pumuna ng mga ganyang bagay yung mga taong walang significance sa buhay natin. random officemates, kapit bahay, faux friends etc. Our true friends know what we are going through and dont even make an issue out of it.

I have to agree din dito. most of my friends know na nag-iipon pa ulit kame before magka-baby. pero yung mga ibang tao lang talaga ang makulit. nananakot pa na baka mahirapan na kame magkaanak pag di namin itry agad kase tumatanda na kame. my husband and i are both in our late 20s kase. pero deadma lang, di pa naman ako masyado affected sa mga usisero't usisera. maybe because i was expecting these kind of questions na din after we got married and decided to delay our baby plans.

[bluemargarita]

^i totally agree, that comment of bluemargarita's really, literally hits the spot!

hahaha yes sis we know the type! silang sila ang mahilig mang usisa. the worst for me yung "doctor" na nagmemedical sa driver's license renewal. (OT: may contact lens ako, at tinanong grado ng eyes ko tapos sinulat sa papel "20/20" LOL) as in mega ask bakit wala pa kong baby..bakit di raw ako magpa work up,etc etc..grabeng randomness ha. sino ka bahhhh??!!? leave me alone hahahaha!