Would you settle for a guy who already has a kid?

[LilaFowler]

^ I agree with that. Una talaga yung bata. Lucky lang kami kasi I really get along with my stepdaughter so minsan lang sya kailangan mamili between us.

My husband has a 9 y/o daughter with his ex-wife. We started dating when she was 5 and I love her like she's my own daughter.

My husband tries to be fair naman pero minsan it's hurtful when he says it's not my place to say things or to have an opinion kasi she's not my daughter. (Ex private vs public school, amount of extra curricular activity etc.)

Mahirap minsan to find a good medium between being involved with your step daughter kasi you care and stepping back kasi in the end she is still not yours.

[plumpolka]

i change my answer... i think it all boils down on the relationship bet the guy and the ex. the kid is not really the issue but it's always the ex (mom).


depende kung gaano ka ok or kagulo yung relationship nila. Kung okay man sila, is it too close to comfort? or if messy, gaano ka messy and would you want to be part of the picture?


Super hirap. alam ko mahal ko yung bf ko, pero i dont see myself living my life together with him kasi kami, magulo relationship namin ng x nya. kami ang not in good terms... kaya super hirap for me din to accept yung anak dahil sa nanay nya. and yes alam ko wala akong magagawa kasi kahit anong mangyari, ako parin yung pumapasok sa "family" nila so wala akong magagawa about his x. ako ang lulugar kasi nauna parin sya kahit ano man maging role ko sa buhay ng bf ko.

[kvandenhaak]

^What you can do is just to let your BF deal with it himself. You don't really have to have a relationship with the mom. Don't talk to her, don't do anything.

[amethyst028]

i'm currently with a guy who has a 6yr. old son. he had the child when is was 40 yrs. old already so he is super attached. he is civil with the mom of the kid. i met the mom by accident we were going somewhere and he saw his kid and the mom walking so he asked them  to ride in the car. super awkward moment for all of us.

anyway it's already a given that when you date someone with kid/kids the child/children will always be the priority. their time with you depends on their availability but their kid/kids comes first. in my case he always brings his son along. the son is already super comfortable with me and he even looks for me when i'm not around. i don't do anything or try hard for the child to like me coz i don't want to look like i'm applying for the role of a stepmom or something.

at first i was annoyed coz he always brings his son so we can't plan dates for adults. it always involves doing kid stuff. but now i think it's good coz i feel like we're getting to know each other at a good pace and not going too fast. and really trying to see if we can fit in each other's lives for the long term not the superficial dates that couples usually go to with their best foot forward all the time.



 

[Shadow Angel]

Dati sabi ko ok lang the time na looking pa ako but when time comes na I met someone na may kid getting know each other pa lang ayaw ko na. Its not my thing di ako selosang tao pero di ko gusto na starting pa lang ng relationship need ko ng mag compromise na its a life time na kasama un kid/kids nya sa life namin. Kaya before pa ako mafall idrop the guy na lang.

[fall2pieces]

gusto ko first child ng guy with me kaya ayaw ko ng may kid na sa iba.. iba pa rin yung guy eh first time magkaroon ng child.. mas special.. saka ayaw ko din ng may connection pa sa past, selosa ako.

[Shadow Angel]

^I have a friend na ganyan ang situation. I mean asawa nya ngayon may anak sa ex tapos sabay kami nag buntis ni friend nakukumpara nya na iba Un excitement ng asawa ko sa asawa nya. Kasi di na nga raw 1st time dad. Tapos sobrang selosa pa sya. Kahit tanggap naman nya minsan di nya maiwasan mag emote dahil nga buntis mas sensitive.

[plumpolka]

^ depende siguro if planado yung anak or hindi. kung aksidente lang naman kasi nya nabuntis yung x nya, iba siguro yung excitement sa pagbubuntis sa kanya na asawa na at naplano na talaga