on wife who cheat...

[honey-ecclaire]

sis victim ano ng update sayo?

[maeka]

mga sis counted ba na cheating kung un ex bf mo na bestfriend mo e nagchichika pa din ako pero hindi ganon kaconstant - kasi nga si hubby sobrang seloso sya sa ex mo na un. but wala naman masama sa pag uusap dahil plain at without meaning naman, long lost friend na chikka lang.

hindi naman siguro sis basta ganun lang

[fegloria1954]

mga sis counted ba na cheating kung un ex bf mo na bestfriend mo e nagchichika pa din ako pero hindi ganon kaconstant - kasi nga si hubby sobrang seloso sya sa ex mo na un. but wala naman masama sa pag uusap dahil plain at without meaning naman, long lost friend na chikka lang.

pompz, siguro para hinde maging sobrang seloso si hubby, maige kasali siya sa chikahan niyo ni ex.

[iamanewbie]

guyz i need help please!

i only marry my husband because he got me pregnant.i first met him jan 06 when my cuz introduced me to him in person.my cuz used to work in japan as an entertainer & my husband was a waiter/singer in their club.my husband saw my pics in my cuz's cabinet & since then he started calling me(that was 2005).i was never really attracted to him. napilitan lang ako magpakasal sa kanya dahil nga nabuntis nya ako.i never loved him then.imagine i just met him jan 06 & we got married june 06.biglaan ang lahat. i thought the relationship will work out & il learn to love him but it turned out not..dahil hindi ko [textspeak!] kilala at hindi nya ako kilala we always fight.i was never a fun of fighting kaya laging nakatikom ang bibig ko.hindi kami magkasundo sa lahat ng bagay (he's 10yrs older than me), hindi magkasundo intellect namin..there were many times na nagsisisi ako in marrying him.pero naiisip ko anak namin,naaawa ako at alam ko mahal na mahal nya ang anak namin..

he went to malaysia apr 08 for work.3 yrs contract . it was a relief for me kasi malayo kami & i thought everything will be okay this time. not until i met someone..he's my colleague. he's tall dark & handsome.a well-respected man at matalino ( which is a turn on for me).11 yrs older than me. annuled & have 2 kids pero hindi nya kasama.he's living alone.sa kanya ko nakita ang katangian ng taong gusto kung makasama habambuhay.. alam ko kasalanan ito pero mahal ko [textspeak!] mga sis..mahal na mahal..honestly matagal na kami may relasyon sa isat isa..over a year na.no one knows about us..only my best friend who is in Thailand..alam nyang married ako but he's willing to take all the risk dahil mahal na mahal nya ako at hindi nya ako kayang mawala sa buhay nya. he's a guy whom any girl will fall for if they get to know him better.everyday i long for him, want him & i cant imagine myself without him. marami nang nangyari sa amin..we are wild lovers at sa kanya ko natutunan on how to give & take when it comes to love making (bagay na hindi ko natutunan sa asawa ko, at hindi ko alam ang foreplay before!)
mga sis, please help me what to do..mahal ko ang taong ito pero naawa ako sa hubby ko..pero alam ko hindi ako magiging masaya sa kanya at hindi ko nakikita ang sarili ko sa kanya..

alam ko mahaba ang post ko...but i badly need ur advices..thank you! i will wait for ur replies..

 

[chengkii]

iamanewbie - wow! complicated.

When you say that the new guy is willing to take the risk, do you mean he's willing to spend money on annulment? kasi siyempre, pwede kangkasuhan ng concubinage pag nalaman ni hubby iyan. How far will this new guy go for you. Kung hindi niya kasama iyun kids niya, is he supporting them as well? Ano ang treatment niya sa anak mo? Kasi siyempere, you need to consider your kid as well.

Things to consider. 1 year pa lang kayo magkasama. It's always different once you start living together under 1 roof. Baka kaya feeling mo is meant na talaga kayo is because it didn't take long nung yun hubby mo ang nakabuntis sa iyo. Think about it and pray.

[maeka]

tama si sis chengki...malaki din agwat ng age nyo ng hubby mo and naging problem nyo to diba? yung new guy mo ganun din...pagisipan mo muna sis....

[pompz]

sis maeka hehe para akong nabunutan ng tinik hahaha
sis fegloria1954 - Correct sis siguro unti unti kong ipapasok sa usapan, khit paano matatanda na naman kami- magiging part na lang yun ng memories diba! thanks thanks thanks!

[pompz]

sis iamanewbie, siguro nakikita mo lang sa kanya yung hinahanap mo sa hubby mo, alam natin lahat kahit gaano mo pa sya kamahal, masama pa din ang ginagawa mo, kung ako sa iyo, ayusin mo muna ang gusot mo kay hubby kung talagang aso't pusa kayo and left and right ang mga pananaw sa buhay siguro dapat lang talaga maghiwalay kayo, pero kung pipilitin mo naman ayusin ang gusot mo kay hubby para kay baby magagawa mo yan, alam mo ba na naniniwala ako ang itatagal ng relastiionship ay nasa babae- babae ang may pinakamalaking involvement sa relationship, kung marunong kang magtiis para kay baby magagawa mo un para sa anak mo, just always pray sis asks for guidance and strength, kung hindi na talaga kayo pwede ni hubby magkaroon kayo ng maayos na paghihiwalay, God Bless sis!

[maeka]

natumpak mo sis

[fegloria1954]

sis maeka hehe para akong nabunutan ng tinik LOL
sis fegloria1954 - Correct sis siguro unti unti kong ipapasok sa usapan, khit paano matatanda na naman kami- magiging part na lang yun ng memories diba! thanks thanks thanks!

pompz, you can say that again!  Take care, God bless and make the decision to love your husband each and everyday.  Because love is not only a feeling.  It is also an action - the action to decide to love.

[iamanewbie]

chengkii --im sorry i got u misunderstood the phrase " he's willing to take the risk" . what i meant was gagawin nya lahat "to keep me".but not financially, we didn't talk about me getting annulment. hindi ko din naisip yun.im sorry if may pagkaimmature reply ko. he has 2kids. d 1st one(from wife (annulled))he never see her since her 1st bday.she's 15 now. the 2nd one is 10 yrs old (from a diff woman),whom he supports financially. i asked him kung mahal ba nya anak ko , he said "tanggap ko naman sya, at matutunan ko syang mahalin dahil anak mo sya."

pag naiisip kong mawalay sa kanya, nasasaktan na ako. hindi ko kakayanin. pag mawalay ako sa asawa ko ,mabubunutan ako ng tinik. mali talaga na nagpakasal ako kaagad..

[iamanewbie]

maeka - wala pa kami 1 mo when i thought of the relationship i was into..i knew it would be hard. yup, he's 11yrs older than me pero he had turned me on the very 1st time i saw him. there was a spark.matalino kasi sya,magaling magdala ng sarili.confident & has strong personality which is lahat kabaliktaran ng hubby ko.. i knew that he's the person i wanted to be with. pero alam ko din naman na walang ginawang kasalanan ang asawa ko mula nung kinasal kami.mabait din naman sya,sya ang nagalaga sa anak namin nung 1yr syang walang work.hatid sundo ako sa trabaho..except of course he's tight in money. kasi alam nya magastos ako kaya sya na lang daw ang magipon.
i chatted with him online last week, video cam & all, when i saw him i was never excited, i didn't miss him at all.it was like i wanted to end our talk right away.not because i'm guilty but because i felt nothing for him anymore.
you know the saying : "I love him but i'm not inlove with him".

[mcenyll]

hirap naman nyan sis iamnewbie. alam mo sis, kelangan mo talaga desisyonan yan. kasi sa akin lang, dahil sa intimate na kayo ng karelasyon mo ngayon, kahit anong sabihin ng iba, kung ano yung feeling mo, yun pa din naman ang susundin mo eh, kasi nga intense pa masyado yung relationship.

ang pag-isipan mo na lang maigi ngayon ano ang gagawin mo regarding your hubby at ano ang magiging bukas ng anak mo sakaling maghiwalay kayo ng asawa mo at sumama ka ng tuluyan sa bf mo ngayon.

[krisle703]

Hi! I always visit this thread but I never tried to respond because I don't understand why anyone (be it the wife or the husband) especially parents would still seek love or attention other than their partners or their kids. I too married young and sort of napilitan into marriage but I believe in its sanctity. Personally, I don't think I would need another man in my life even if my husband leaves me or whatsoever..

 Maybe because I love my son so much or my world revolves around him that much that I know he would need me the most when his father leaves us (just if ever). My mom was laso widowed when she was only 29 but I never see her entertain her suitors or showed any interest into having a relationship with a new one. I have friends who are also single mothers and whenever they tell me stories about their new boyfriends or dates I wanted to tell them "e sino nagaalaga ng baby mo habang nakikipagdate ka?" Ako nga na may asawa wala ng time makipagdate dahil nakakaguilty iwan si baby.. what more pa yung baby mo na ikaw lang inaasahan.." I know I am being narrow minded but that's how I feel about them.


Until 2 nights ago.. I dreamt that I fell inlove with another guy and It felt so real. We are just sitting beside each other pero iba yung kilig na naramdaman ko and hindi ko na nararamdaman kay hubby. In that dream I know I was married and I feel guilty but I just can't leave the guy because he makes me feel so good.


I woke up realizing that God maybe wants me to know that it is never right to judge someone just because you have different beliefs or disposition in life. You will never understand unless andun ka na sa situation na yun. Ika nga madali mag advice pero pag ikaw na yung may problem na ganun mahirap sundin kahit yung sariling advice mo na..

Sorry mahaba.. just want to share..

[pompz]

sis fegloria1954 correct, for 11 yrs I can say na we love more each day, and kahit okay na I still always ask God for strengths and blessings in our marriage, kaya kahit maayos na relationship nyo need pa din natin si God.

sis krisle703 ganon nga siguro un, kasi may reasons naman why nag commit si girl or si hubby kaya hindi natin sila masisisi, pero let's pray na sana malaman nila kagad ang tama at mali before it's too late.

[krisle703]

^ tama sis.. but it doesn't mean that I'm changing my stand on it. Siguro I'll try to be more broad minded when it comes to single parents.. I'm not even anti-divorce or annulment lalo na pag abusive na ang partner. Siguro pro-kids.. haha parang diaper lang.. Syempre pag may anak ka na iba na priorities mo you hardly think about yourself anymore..

[pompz]

pareho tayo sis- lagi ko kasing iniisip pano kung mawala si hubby or maghiwalay kami, iniisip ko kagad ang mga anak ko kahit sabihin kasi ng guy na mamahalin nya mga anak ko pero para sa mga anak ko iba pa din ang tunay na tatay diba, pero isip ko lang yun sis wag naman mangyari hehe rossedfingers , ayaw ko din magsalita ng tapos dahil mahirap na, baka bumalik sa'yo. let your destiny deceides ika nga hehe

[hopelessromantic]

@sis iamnewbie napansin ko lang sa post mo na mahal mo si guy dahil tall dark and handsome...matalino at may confidence,magaling magdala ng sarili,strong ang personality...hindi ba parang yung good traits lang niya ang tinitignan mo kaya minamahal mo siya?and your hubby is kabaliktaran.kahit ba may pangit siyang ugali,ganyan pa rin ba ang magiging pagmamahal at tingin mo sa kanya?

[miss resilient]

buhay pa pala ang thread na ito 

well, nakakatulong pala na sabihin mo sa tao kung ano ang stand mo sa situation ninyo. when i told him that i cannot leave my hubby..mejo dumistansya siya. but then he communicates every now and then.sabi nga niya.."friends are friends". i just told him na kung minsan kailangan mong panindigan ang isang tao kahit may makita ka pang mas gusto mo kaysa sa kanya. hindi yung tatalon ka na naman sa isang relationship dahil ito ang gusto mo sa ngayon.

[iamanewbie]

sis pompz -- i've seen his worst mood & traits but it never changed how i feel for him..lalo ko pa syang minahal. sad but true. madalas ako pumunta sa bahay niya kasi he has his own house near his parents. yes, we argue, we fight but we never get physical. i know he loves me so much. he is so emotional when it comes to loving me. sa edad nya he is not playing any more. i know my husband loves me so but i know i can never love him back more than he loves me. I love him only because sya ang tatay ng anak ko. but im not inlove with him. i never learn to love him.  alam ko it will be so much harder kasi there's our daughter who will be affected of this all & will be much hurt whenever things will not work out right sa amin ng hubby ko. i dont want my daughter to hate me when she grows up. my mind is not closed for us (me & hubby) getting things work out. but as ive said thinking of leaving this guy will give me so much pain. what if mali ang decision ko to be with my hubby. what if hindi talaga ako kelanman magiging masaya sa kanya.what if things will be much much worst pala. hayyy, ang hirap talaga...