What would you do?

[miatamommy]

If  you and hubby?s mistress are both pregnant at the same time, what would you do?

Here?s our situation. I?m on my 5th month already, and she?s 7 months pregnant. This is our fourth kid while first baby naman nila ni hubby, pero may eldest siya na iba yung father. They?ve been together for 3 years while hubby and I are married for 10 years. (A little backstory: LDR kami ng husband ko for 3 years kasi he got a better job opportunity in Canada while our daughters and I stayed in the US. Nalaman ko yung relationship nila nung sumunod kami dito sa kanya last 2016. They broke up for awhile pero nagkabalikan din pala). Inamin lahat sakin ng hubby ko lahat ?to just late last year lang, because he wanted to make sure na stable na pregnancy ko. Our daughters are 9 and 7 year-old twins. We still live in the same town as the mistress, because ayaw mag-move ng husband ko sa ibang town and ayaw niya din naman kami pabalikin nalang sa States. I can?t think properly right now, every night ko nalang iniisip gagawin ko and I can?t sleep because of this. Help me please.

[plumpolka]

decide for yourself and for your kids. wag mo hintayin or sundin kung ano yung gagawin at gusto nyang gawin para sa inyo. this is the time para ikaw ang magdecide para sa inyong mag-iina dahil nagdecide na sya para sa sarili nya nung binuntis nya yung kabit nya. if you want to go back sa states, go. ayaw nya kayo pabalikin kasi he wants to keep you and his kabit close to him para di sya mahirapan kung kaninong kama naman sya tatabi. para sakin, dont depend your life on his decision. kung ano gagawin nya. ikaw ang gumawa ng paraan para makapagdecide sya sa kung ano ba ang gagawin nya based sa decision mo. ok lang ba sayo na you and the kabitch's family ay nasa isang town lang? i belive na hindi pwedeng may 2 family na kino-consider ang lalaki. so its either your family or hers.


stay strong! kung financial naman reason bakit d mo sya kaya iwanan, im sure god will provide and mahigpit din naman sila sa child support.

[Girltalker2]

TS, I agree Kay sis pumploka. What your hubby did is unacceptable.

Di ka lang nya niloloko, sa harap pa ng madla, and soon, right in front of your children?s face.
Di naghirap parents mo para ganyanin ka lang ng asawa mo. Worse, pati mga anak nyo, guguluhin nya ang buhay only all for his own benefit.

Dapat strong ka, especially for your kids and for yourself. Walang Ibang lalaban for you and for your kids Kundi ikaw lang.

What would I do? Leave. If I?m not ready, I will prepare myself financially/emotionally and when the day comes, I will leave.
This is what I?ve done. Over a span of 10 years, nagsave ako ng nagsave. Of course part of me was hoping din. Hanggang sa napagod ako, and when I left, there was no turning back. Have 2 kids in tow. And so far, malalaki na anak ko and NO REGRETS.

My assumption here - he is NOT remorseful and intends to have your family and continue his ties with the mistress and bastard.

[kvandenhaak]

Oh wow...I can't imagine the pain you are going through. I don't even know what to say. I can't offer you anything right now other than prayers for you and your kid(s)!

[Girltalker2]

Sis, may relatives ba kayo sa US?
If yes, Mas mainam nga siguro na pumunta ka muna sa US para may makausap ka sa problema mo. May karamay ka kahit papano sa pagguide ng daughters mo.

Alam mo, based sa experience ko, mas madali nawala ang pain nung lumayo ako sa ex ko. Nung umalis ako ng pinas, mas naging madali ang pag move on. Mas naayos ko buhay naming mag iina. Mas naka focus ako sa career ko at less din mga chismosa. Tsaka Yung peace of mind, doon ko narealize na walang katumbas ng pera Yung peace of mind na naranasan ko  nung iwan ko ex ko.

Anyway, another alternative pala - Can you not file any case against them dyan sa Canada?

[sarsingkit]

I would divorce him, You have the upper hand. You have 3 kids plus one on the way. I wont leave Canada though. I would stay and burden him on child support. Seems harsh but you have to think of your kids and yourself.

[kvandenhaak]

Oh, nasa Canada pala kayo? Good! Divorce his @$$! Ask for child and spousal support. You don't have to suffer! I understand that you might have some feelings still for him but bottomline is he doesn't give a cr@p about what you feel.

[Girltalker2]

^ ang Sarap talaga lumaban kapag wala ka sa pinas ano? May Laban ka talaga at ang batas ay nasa side mo. ^^

Sa pinas, wala ka na maasahan, ikaw pa kinawawa.

[sarsingkit]

^Masaya talaga. Haha. I guess that is why my husband is so good kasi takot sa divorce. Lol. Sabi ko sa kanya, subukan nya lang magloko at uubusin ko lahat ng pinaghirapan nya. Haha.

[plumpolka]

di ko lang sure if may divorce sa canada for filipinos. kasi ang alam ko kahit nasa ibang bansa ka kung kasal ka as filipino citizen, since walang divorce sa ph, di rin ma-grant ang divorce nyo sa canda. unless one of you were canadian citizen nung nagpakasal kayo, not sure. narinig ko lang sya sa isang law program. but you can file for child support im sure, mahigpit sila dun. at ang alam ko kasi, kahit nasa US ka, derecho bawas na yun sa sweldo nya at derecho sa accnt mo kahit nasan ka man. and also, kailangan mo din isipin sa shoes ng mga anak mo. ano ma-feel nila na kasama nila sa isang town yung umagaw sa tatay nila? and worse may kapatid pa sila sa labas. definitely may effect sa kanila yun kahit ano gagawin mo so better think carefully not only for yourself but also for their well being. sakit nyang, 2 mos lang pagitan nyo.

[Girltalker2]

I would divorce him, You have the upper hand. You have 3 kids plus one on the way. I wont leave Canada though. I would stay and burden him on child support. Seems harsh but you have to think of your kids and yourself.

Kaya payo ko nga day friends ko huwag pakasal sa pinas. As UK magpakasal! Women are more protected in UK or pay may alimony.
As Pinas, Kawawain ka lang. may batas nga, Ubos naman pera mo, Oras mo, energy mo sa pagfile lang ng annulment, ano pa kaya pag nagfile ka pa ng ibang kaso - good luck nalang.

[Shadow Angel]

Better leave ang husband at ang kabit may deep relationship na sila diba sabi mo naghiwalay nagkabalikan pa worst nabuntis pa. Hwag mo ng hintayin na si husband mo pa ang magdecide may sarili ka rin desisyon. Naputol na ang partenership from the start na nagloko sya. Makakakuha ka ng spousal/child support. Isipin mo ang sarili at mga anak mo.

[sarsingkit]

Kahit kasal sa pinas, couples can still file divorce sa Canada as long as both of you are residents here in Canada. I don't think courts can refuse divorce proceedings Lalo na if pareho naman kayo pumirma sa papers.

Ganito kasi yan, kahit I-acknowledge pa ni hubby (hopefully soon to be ex)  ang anak sa kabit, eh isa lang naman yun. Child support isn't that big. PAg ikaw ni-divorce mo sya, he pays child support for four kids plus spousal support for you so super laki mawawala kay hubby nyan. Kaya takot nya lang if you leave him.

[preciousjulia]

Wow sis..natitiis mo lahat ng yan?..Yung pain, sama ng loob and everything while you're pregnant? Na dapat inaalagaan ka ng husband mo at ikaw ang priority nya? Three years na kamu sila tapos ngayon buntis pa? Ano pa ba hinihintay mo sis? Yung lugmok ka na at yung kusa ka na lang iwan ng hubby mo for his kabit? Tama ang sabi ng mga sis natin dito. Save mo sarili from this walang kwentang hubby. Kasi if mahal ka talaga nya at importante ang family nyo for him hindi na kayo aabot sa situation na yan. Ok fine! nagkamali sya dati pero inulit nya at nagkabalikan sila..hindi ba dapat enough na reason na yun for you to decide what's best para sa inyong mag-iina? God bless you sis and have a safe pregnancy.