Is it worth it?

[fall2pieces]

Is it worth it to love someone far from you?

Is it worth it to love someone na hindi mo nakakasama at nakakausap?

Is it worth it to love someone who doesn't have time for you, because of his job?

Is it worth it to love someone you can't see and be with everyday?

Is it worth it to continue loving someone na sandali mo lang nakakasama every year? Mas matagal pa yung hindi?

Is it worth it to wait in vain  for your messages for days, without a clue about what's going on with you?

Is it worth it to fight for you?

Tell me is it worth it? Is it worth it to continue loving you?
#LDRProblems

[kaythrielle]

Is this a trick question? Or maybe a rhetorical question? 😄

Mukhang malalim ang pinaghuhugutan mo sis.

Why don't you ask your bf what HE thinks? Is he still willing to make it work with you? Do you think he thinks that your LDR relationship is still worth it?

Because if one you thinks it's not worth it, then maybe it's not.
If both of you still thinks it is, then maybe it still is.

[fall2pieces]

For me I don't even know if it's still worth it. I love him but  I don't know if he loves me that much to make our situation better. I don't  think he's willing to compromise for me.

He is a seaman. Mahirap in the sense na madalas wala kayong communication tapos sobrang busy nya sa work. Halos wala syang time for me.

I don't know if kaya ko yung ganitong situation ng matagal.. kasi I don't think he's going to change his job. He loves his job. He's not willing to look for another job para maging ok yung situation namin.

[rasee16]

^Nasagot mo na question mo sis. If you think it's no longer worth it, then leave. Sayang oras mo to be over thinking and holding grudges sa current situation mo.

[fall2pieces]

Yun na nga eh... Sisses,  what will you do if you're in this situation? 
You love the guy but not his job...  are you willing to adjust for his job?

Palagi nga akong nagooverthink minsan I think I'm annoying to him na. Kasi kapag busy sya tapos ako yung hindi busy I message him at di ko mapigilang magdrama drama minsan.

[kvandenhaak]

If you're not happy with the situation, don't prolong the agony. It doesn't look like there's an end to your situation dahil ganon talaga trabaho nya.

[Girltalker2]

Yun na nga eh... Sisses,  what will you do if you're in this situation? 
You love the guy but not his job...  are you willing to adjust for his job?

Palagi nga akong nagooverthink minsan I think I'm annoying to him na. Kasi kapag busy sya tapos ako yung hindi busy I message him at di ko mapigilang magdrama drama minsan.

Kung ako ikaw, I will leave.
Ayoko ng ldr.
Let this be a lesson learned. A guy's job is part of the package. You can't change him, what he wants and what he is capable of.

Dami pa naman ibang guys. You're not yet married parin naman. Hanap ka nalang ng guy na Hindi ofw or seaman.

[fall2pieces]

Kaya kong tiisin kung sana hindi magtatagal eh magbabago yung sitwasyon. Kaso hindi ko alam kung kailan at kung willing sya. When I tried opening up to him, he said he doesn't want na dumating sa point that he has to choose between me and his job.

[fall2pieces]

kvandenhaak ganoon na nga sis. mali ko alam ko ng ganun work pero tinuloy ko pa rin, not knowing the real situation.

Girltalker2 kung meron nga lang sana sis.. kaso palagi kong naiisip na baka wala na kong makitang ibang guy.

Gusto ko nga sanang lumayo muna sa kanya at makapagisip isip..

[kvandenhaak]

Obviously you are not okay with the situation. Ako, pwede ako sa ganyan dahil I have the patience. But not everyone can survive a long distance relationship. Slowly wean yourself out of the situation or kung mas matapang ka, just end it right away.

Sus, trust me meron kang makikita pang iba. If you are keeping him because you are worried that you might not find anyone else then you are short changing yourself. Don't do that.

[kaythrielle]

Sis, hindi mo naman kailangan "lumayo muna sa kanya para makapag-isip isip" kasi malayo ka naman na sa kanya talaga - physically. And you can do all the thinking you want.
Siguro huwag mo lang masyado paikutin mundo mo sa kanya. Make yourself busy with other things....new hobby, go out with friends, binge watch, enroll sa gym, etc...

[mysterioza_me]

I think you need to talk. Puso sa puso. All out kung all out. It seems kasi na di ka secured sa relationship ninyo kaya may mga ganyan alalahanin ka. Maybe your relationship is still young, gaano na ba kayo katagal? Nung bago kami ng bf ko natanong ko din yan lahat but as time went by nakakasanayan na din though may time din talaga na hinahanap ko ang physical presence niya. Ldr din kami and yes this relationship of ours is worth fighting for since we are both committed to make it work. E kayo ba?

[Vergil_oct1517]

test [textspeak!].
..

[fall2pieces]

kaythrielle oo nga eh, malayo na nga ako sa kanya tapos lalayo pa ako, lol... I mean di muna ako magmessage sa kanya.. minsan kasi diko mapigilan eh, kc madalas naman hindi kami magkausap so puro pagiisip na nga lang ginagawa ko.. tapos mababasa na naman nya yung mga kadramahan ko maaasar na naman sya sakin.

siguro di ko muna sya imemessage, kasi ayaw nya ng naiistorbo sya sa work nya.. hayaan ko nalang muna sya.

mysterioza_me, yun ang gusto ko eh, makapagusap kami ng maayos.. kaso hindi eh, walang time para makapagusap ng maayos.  di ko masabi yung mga gusto kong sabihin kasi lagi sya nagmamadali.. so leave lang ako lagi ng messages sa kanya.. 5months pa lang kami. hindi pa nga kami nagkikita kasi uuwi pa lang sya this year.. hindi ko nga sure kung matutuloy pa yun..

yes bago pa lang nga kaya siguro nagkakaganito ako.. hindi ako sanay sa ganito.. gusto ko yung may communication palagi.. kasi parang hindi na nga kayo magkasama, hindi pa kayo nag-uusap, parang what's the point pa ng relationship nyo.. oo nga uuwi sya, tapos 1 month lang yun babalik na nman... sobrang saglit lang ng time na yun. siguro nga hindi pa ako secured sa relationship na ito..

i'm committed and i think he's committed as well but i don't know what the future holds.. if i can last long with this kind of situation...

[Girltalker2]

Girltalker2 kung meron nga lang sana sis.. kaso palagi kong naiisip na baka wala na kong makitang ibang guy.

So are you saying you're just settling with him kasi wala kang choice?

Sis, you always have a choice. Nasa sayo iyan if you want to be happy.

Are you that desperate? Di ka mabubuhay ng walang bf? Are you ugly? Di naman siguro. And you must be young, less than 30yo? So definitely makakahanap ka pa.
If I'm in your shoes, kahit pa Hindi ako makahanap, I will take that risk because I know di ako magiging masaya with a seaman bf/husband because that's not the family life I envisioned I would be having.

Don't ever settle. Kasi in the end, ikaw din talunan nyan.

Sus, trust me meron kang makikita pang iba. If you are keeping him because you are worried that you might not find anyone else then you are short changing yourself. Don't do that.

I agree with sis kvandenhaak. Once you're trapped there, ipilit mo to be with him while you're not happy, lalo kang di makakahanap because you're not available and single.
Worse, mamya ma realize mo na ayaw mo na talaga sa situation eh baka lesser prospects pa kasi you're older na.

Hay naku sis! Dami kayang guys na puede mo makilala. Just go out and be selective, you will definitely find the right guy for you.

[fall2pieces]

@Girltalker2, no I'm not young anymore, I'm in my 30s na. Hindi kasi ako yung tipo na ligawin, first time na may nanligaw sa akin kaya sinagot ko sya. Siguro kaya may insecurities din ako.

It's not that hindi ako mabubuhay na walang BF. I've been single for too long.
Kaya gusto ko sana ayusin, gusto ko na sana ito na yung last. Kaso nga ganito nga.

Hindi nga ito yung family life na gusto ko. Gusto ko yung pamilya na buo. Yung mga anak ko may tatay na nakikita sila. Yung nandun sa mga importanteng araw sa buhay nila.

[Girltalker2]

^ sis di na uso ligaw these days

Date-date na ang uso!

During my younger days, di din naman ako ligawin. Had a bf at a very young age. Wala opportunity to meet others. Got married, then got separated. Now in my 40s. Tingin mo ligawin ako? Of course not. But I mingle. I keep options open. Branch out your contacts. Improve on your personality so you can meet more people - guys yes but girl friends din as they can also be your allies.

Di ko akalain nga sa edad kong ito, I can still meet someone. I just went out, announced (subtly) I'm single. Ayun, got dates! Not exactly ligaw eh. And I'm not naman a head turner na tipong ligawin din. Just a typical mid age single mom. Now I have a partner and happy.
Kaya ikaw pa, 30s ka palang. Huwag mo sayangin years mo dyan and of course huwag ka naman uupo Lang sa tabi. Go out and mingle.

[mysterioza_me]

TS mostly ang mga lalake ayaw ng drama. Kapag ganyan talaga ginawa mo maiinis siya. Nung early stage ng relationship namin ganyan din. Naging bf ko siya habang nasa abroad siya and ako nandito. Dami ding drama pero buti na lang mature bf ko maghandle ng sitwasyon. Then I realized I need to change and iwasan ang drama kasi tamarin siya kausap ako or manawa kasi imbes na i-cheer up ko siya pagmagkausap kami papasahan ko lang siya ng kaartehan ko. Nag-allot kami ng isang araw na dapat magvideocall kami or private messages na walang puknat since busy din kami pareho and saliwa ang sked namin.

True din naman sinabi mo na maiksi lang bakasyon nila pero you can make the most out of it naman. Kami usapan namin magbabakasyon din kami somewhere kada uwi niya, ?me time? namin kumbaga. Everyday niya ako sinusundo from work and lumalabas kami every weekend. So pag-nandito siya everyday din kami magkasama.

Hindi ko din pinangarap ang ldr relationship, kasi hindi ko kaya ang physical absence ng partner ko. Parang napakatagal ng buwan or taon. Pero nabago pananaw ko sa relationship na ito. Ang bilis-bilis lang pala lumipas ng panahon di ko namamalayan pauwi na naman pala siya.

At the end of the day sis ikaw pa din magde-decide kung kaya mo. Baka kasi ngayon sinasabi mo di mo kaya but as the relationship matures matutunan mo din matanggap work ni bf. Wait until you meet your bf (pero wag ka paiisa kung di ka pa sure diyan) bakasakali na kapag magmeet kayo marealize mo na worth it naman pala sakripisyo ninyo. But if you really, really think na di mo kaya ang ldr the maybe its time to quit.

[angeljolie]

Siguro hintayin mo muna na magkita kayo. After that, kung talagang itutuloy nyo yung relationship nyo, aralin mo ang buhay ng seaman. Then decide kung okay ka sa ganung buhay. Kung 5 months pa lang kayo, you're still learning about each other.

[fall2pieces]

Siguro nga, hintayin ko nalang ang paguwi nya bago ako magdecide..

@Girltalker2, akala ko late na ako sa age kong ito.. siguro nga di ako dapat mawalan ng pag-asa na may magkakagusto pa sa akin..

@mysterioza_me same pala tayo sis.. sana nga maging kagaya nyo rin kami.. siguro nga hindi pa ako sanay sa ganito... @angeljolie siguro nga dapat bigyan ko muna ng chance hanggang makauwi sya dito.. masyado lang siguro akong emotional kaya ako nagkakaganito.