Office Gossip and Mean Girls

[hedonista]

May iba ibang character sa opisina at di mawawala ang mga sinambit ko sa ibaba. I have been a subject to all of those types. Pero I need my job more. So I learn to control emotions and reactions. I reached out to HR once pero dedma. I learned to medidate basta dedmatology. Just focus on my job. Pero nakakairita pa rin that these people exist talaga... di maiwasan.

SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCES sisses

Do you experience:

1. being subject of office gossip
2. malicious rumor
3. plain chismis
4. backstabbing co-workers
5 plastic friends

[krabby_patty]

I have a colleague who has something bad to say about everybody -- even the person I thought was her closest friend. She's nice to me, but I won't be surprised if she also says things behind my back. Medyo clich? pero if you have nothing nice to say about anybody, best to just keep your mouth shut

[Evolet027]

Sa first Company ko, I heard na ilang beses na pala ko nachismis na buntis and yung nag chi chismis yung babae na me gusto sa nanliligaw saken that time. Funny thing, yung babae, nabuntis at nanganak, pero ako na ichinismis nya, wala pa din laman ang tyan.

Sa 5th Company ko naman, grupo grupo kasi. SO dahil bago ako, dun ako sa mga kasabay ko na in ako napa grupo. Surprisingly, sobrang chismosa at chismoso ng mga kasa kasama ko palagi, I cannot stand na pag usapan yung mga tao sa team namin. Humiwalay ako. I'd rather be alone kesa i spend ko yung lunch breaks ko talking negatively about people. At hindi ako na surprise na, pati ako eh pag usapan nila.

Sa ngayon, sa new company ko, ganun pa din., I choose to be alone and not be identified sa iisang grupo.

Natuto na din ako na walang pakealam, dedma, keber. Work, bahay lang. Sa work palagi lang ako naka headset so nakaka concentrate ako sa work. Branded as introvert tuloy ako, pero I dont care.

[hedonista]

Hi sis krabby_patty agree ako na kung wala naman maganda sasabihin dapat quiet nalang pero sometimes we cannot control them nasa attitude na nila talaga so I avoid them na lang.

Sis Evolet027 almost same experience tayo and I just started not to talk to anyone unless it is work-related. I keep my headset on at all times or I bring a book so when I eat at our pantry I do not have to look or talk to anyone.

I used to be very cheerful and binabati ko talaga sino man makasalubong and all kumusta hi hello but then, this is the best option now. Kung kelan ako tumanda, and this is inner peace at best. So eto during breaks GT muna ha ha ha

[Evolet027]

Same here sis hedonista. I used to be cheerful and friendly. But the exp brought about by the work environment changed me into an introvert. haha! And yeah, headset is my bestfriend, pag lunchtime mag isa lang din ako.

Like dito sa present company ko. I tried to mingle and start fresh, excited pa ko nung bagong lipat ako kasi naisip ko, mailalabas ko na ulit yung dating ako na friendly, kalog. Kaya lang, yung mga unang kumaibigan saken dito, sila din yung sumaksak saken sa likod. So balik sa introvert mode. Mag 4 yrs na ko dito at OK naman ako. I guess, nasanay na talaga akong mag isa na lang but i'm Happy. I like it na na eentertain ako sa kadramahan at sari saring chismis sa office. Hindi din ako nag oopen ng anything about me, unless matanong ako. Hindi ko na din sila ni add sa FB ko kasi ganun gawain nila eh, pag usapan mga tao based sa activities sa FB. eh kung nagagawa nila yun sa iba, gagawin din nila saken yun. Mas ok ng wala silang alam about me.

[hedonista]

^ true yan sis, I feel that nagiging toxic ang workplace if you allow it to. Nung una nalungkot ako akala ko kasi I made friends pero again, reality check, I am here to work. Yun so Day 2 ko na work and bahay ha ha. Even sa elevator I fiddle on my phone, I open ebook and then may music. Art of deadma talaga.

I also learn that whatever you say will be taken against you, if not now, in the future basta may opportunity sila. I even researched character assassination. Para kasing born out of crab mentality yung iba, others siguro bored or they really have callous personality. Some are users, mabait when they need something.

[plumpolka]

there's this girl na sobrang inis na inis sakin. she has a reputation sa office na lahat na natikman sya, pinoy/expat at tinutuhog nya mga bagong employees samin. mga hindi pa alam yung reputation nya. she's pretty pero sobrang squatter ng ugali. you'll hear her anywhere na volume max ang boses and never mawawala ang PI sa sentence nya. pretty to look at and sobrang seductive magdamit. talagang she enjoys the attention. anyway, me & my bf went to korea nung jan 2015. she says so many bad things about me sa bf ko (friends pa sila nun kasi crush ni girl yung bff ni bf and they went sa same university din). she hated me ever since at sinasabi nya lagi sa bf ko na hiwalayan na daw ako. nababasa ko sa viber ni bf yun pero di ko sya pinapatulan kasi i know better. hinahayaan ko din si bf makipagfriend dito kay girl kasi ayoko naman sya pigilan sa mga gusto nya i-friend although alam nyang i dont like the girl dahil kahit ibang officemates namin, chinichismis sakin na may something daw sila ni bf and i know naman na wala. but this girl is a nega chismis magnet.

anyway, pagbalik namin galing korea, i have a friend sa ibang team and nakwento nya sakin na may nagkwento daw sa kanya na ako daw gumastos sa buong trip namin sa korea. HAHAHA. sobrang nakakainis pero nakakaflatter din na sobrang yaman naman ng tingin nila sakin. and so nagtanong tanong ako kung kanino niya nakuha and tama ako, kay ate girl nga nanggaling yung kwento. kinausap ko yung friend nya na civil naman ako dahil nakawork ko din naman, sinabi ko na wala syang alam sa mga buhay namin ng bf ko so wag sya nagchi-chismis ng kung ano ano. and this girl agreed din naman.

then come xmas 2016, akala ko moved on na si ate girl sakin. i gave my bf NMD xmas gift, then nung dumaan sya sa place ko, nagsisisigaw na naman sya about sa NMD, i dont remember ano exact na sinabi nya pero naalala ko binara sya nung kasama nya (the girl na kinausap ko), sabi "sino naman magbibigay sayo?" tapos natahimik sya.

she hated me so much, palagi nya ako pinaparinggan pag nagkakasama kami sa isang room. di ako umaalis, natatawa lang ako kasi ex nga ng bf ko, nasa canada na, naka move on na, siya, d naman involved sa relationship namin, di parin maka-move on sakin.

i always ignore her lang kasi d ko talaga sya papatulan kahit pa ano gawin nya. pinagkakalat pa nya na di ko daw sya kaya. well, sorry girl, kaya man kita o hindi, hindi kita papatulan. nakakatawa sya, feeling nya ata si regina sya at nasa high school lang sya. kung alam lang nya, mapa-babae or lalaki na akala nyang pinagpapantasyahan sya e diring diri lang sa kanya. baka daw may "extra gravy" ka after.

hahaha! ngayong 2017, wala pa naman na. sorbang di ko talaga sya pinapansin. at nagh-hi at smile ako sa mga kasama nya. and i know she hates it kasi nasabi sakin na pag kaaway daw nya, gusto nya kaaway din ng friends nya. but her friends are mature and they all say hi to me ang nice naman sila sakin. pero ngayon d na sya masyado nagpaparinig. baka napagod na lang sya kasi nga di ko sya pinapatulan. hahaha!

[Evolet027]

^ Aww. Grabe naman yun sis. Insecure yun. I'm sure.

[hedonista]

^^ sobrang insecure sayo sis plumpolka
that is the best reaction is no reaction. tama yan gagayahin kita sis haha i will not waste energy sa mga galit sa akin.
kahapon I feel that as if I walk and I have a disease... mega iwas sila and di namamansin but kasabay ko pa sila mag lunchbreak last week lang. nag iba ihip ng hangin dahil sa isang tao nagpakalat ng kung ano ano at tinawag pa ko powertripper which is so not true.
Ayun dedma na lang sila sa akin lalo yung inggit na tao.

good job sis. tama yan let her be.

[Luna_Lulu]

I love this thread!  I am also tagged as introvert or maybe believed na baka nga introvert ako kasi ayoko makisalamuha sa mga tao lalo nat magtsitsimisan lang ng masama towards other people, Hindi naman sa nagmamalinis pero sobrang daming magandang topic kesa sa nega chismis! Thankful ako na kasama ko si future hubby dito sa current work ko and kami lang talaga lagi magkasama bestfriend, workmate fiance all in one na, and simula noon kasi Id rather have 1 or 2 closest friends na totoo kesa yung madami pero little did you know andami na palang sinasabi behind your back. And super relate ako sa earphones! susko, hindi ko alam ano gagawin ko pag naiwan ko ang earphones ko.

I love the girls on this thread who chose to be alone than deal with negativity and fake people, it only shows how we love and value ourselves that we don't need their attention nor validation.

[hedonista]

Hi sis Luna_Lulu
welcome to this thread. hindi ko na kasi kinaya talaga tapos naalala ko mas ok kausap mga taga GT.
I used to be super introvert when I joined GT in 2007 as in headset and GT lang pag break time ha ha. Then I got hired dito sa isang toxic environment.

It's good to know na di ako nag iisa marami pala nakakaexperience nito.

[plumpolka]

tagal nya ma-insecure girls, years ang tinagal! pinaparinggan pa nya ako ng mga sobrang character assasinating things. nakwento ko nga sa ibang mga ka-officemates ko din na friend ni BF, sabi nila sakin dapat daw ni-report ko kasi below the belt na mga sinasabi sakin. actually, d ko talaga alam reason bat siya inis na inis sakin at gusto nyang nakikisawsaw sa relationship namin ng bf. porket puro tikim lang mga lalaki sa kanya at walang sumeryoso. BTW, na kasama ko na si girl noon sa double date kasama bff ni bf. patay na patay kasi sya dun sa BFF. and take note, sya ang unang humahalik sa lalaki! nakakaloka. e kaso, d na sya pinatulan ni BFF kasi may chismis na kumalat na may inuwi syang ibang lalaki nung isang party sa office namin. sabi ni ate girl, sa sala naman daw natulog yung other guy. nabuko lang nila kasi nung pumasok kinabukasan yung lalaki, yun parin yung damit (laging thursday night ang party samin so may pasok kinabukasan) and ayun, sinabi ni guy "hinatid" daw nya si ate girl at dun na sya natulog.

nasabi lang din sakin ni BF yan kasi tinanong ko bat di na sya pinursue ni BFF nya and ayun nga daw. mga lalaki pa, sobrang bilis kumalat ng chismis na ganyan.

my advice sa mga ganitong eksena is deadmahin lang talaga. ang nasa isip ko nasa office ako, wala ako sa school or baranggay para humanap ng kakampi at lumuhod sa mga leader-leaderan. the only leader i consider are my bosses who pays for my salary. other people's opinion are irrelevant to me. gusto kasi ni ate girl, sya lang center ng attention ng mga lalaki. gusto nya sa kanya lang nahuhumaling. laging nakausli yung pwet nyang flat kung maglakad pero papansinin naman sya talaga dahil laging kulang sa tela ang suot nya. natatawa na lang kami kasi lahat ng bagong lalaki samin, nabiktima na nya kaya inaasar ng mga kateam nila. may nakipagbreak pa sa gf nila tapos tinikman sya pero binalikan din yung gf ulit tapos nagresign na ngayon.

ramdam niyo yung inis ko no? hahaha! nakakainis kasi talaga pero para bigyan ng oras na patulan wag na lang. 

[Evolet027]

^ ok lang sis. Nakakainis naman talaga ang mga pangyayari na ganyan hehe. Pero the way we react to them, yun yung mag dedefine sa character natin. Mas ok kung wag patulan. Classy lang dapat palagi!.

[luckysiete]

Silent treatment ang intervention sa mga ganyang klaseng tao. Buti na lang sa office namin hindi masyado matsismis ang mga tao. Kung meron man, plain tsismis lang.

Gossip ends at the wise person's ears.

[mimiku]

It was on my second company when I experienced something like this. I was young and then there was this 30-year-old EA na sobrang lagi akong pinagtritripan to the point na umiiyak ako lagi sa office. She was domineering and often times sarcastic. I don't know if because she was insecure of my age or what, but I do know that this person had a lot of issues going on in her life so that's why she was so negative with the people around her especially to me. Happy people don't mess with other people ika nila. In the end, she resigned because she had an argument with one of our colleagues. As in nagsigawan sila. This colleague kasi was of same agei so  talagang palaban din. It was a relief for me when she went out.

On my third company, nabully naman ako. I am introvert kasi and I don't usually minggle with my officemates. And then there was this person who made fun of how I am usually silent daw and everytime I made a mistake, she made sure it was highlighted. But then, I was able to prove myself. I was a performer and often times got an award so slowly they learned to respect who I am.

Out of all these experiences made me deadma of everything about officemates. Sa mga next na work ko, I usually dealt with them professionally - friendly but still with caution. I don't engage in any gossip. Whenever something is brewing within the department, I am usually the one who doesn't give any sides. My motto was, I am here to work and not to extend anything personal about me. It made me introvert and less social however, my work environment was less stressful. No strings attached and peaceful -and that is something I won't trade for anything in the workplace.

[hedonista]

^ this is my second week that work lang and talagang disengage muna sa personal matters.
And I can say that my life here at work has become more efficient kasi hindi na ko matagal maglunchbreak and naglilinger sa pantry to chit chat. tapos less stress nga sis I do agree. And hope more peace pa day by day.

Ayoko naman magresign dahil lang sa mga chismosa.