Help how to move on po.

[Mayah111]

Recently I broke up with my 5 yrs and 4 months boyfriend eto lang naman na nagkaproblem kame regarding sa cheating kaso ang bigat di nya kaya bitawan yung girl kasi masaya daw sya dun, pagod na daw sya samin, di nadaw sya happy alam nung girl na may girlfriend sya at may boyfriend din yung girl.. ginive up nya yung samin para sa kanya.. gusto ko na pong magmove on but I don't know how and I don't have friends to talk regarding this.. it feels like im drowning... wala na kong paki sa kanila gusto ko nalang mawala yung sakit... gusto kong mabuo yung sarili ko but how? I can't even cry di pa ko umiiyak since that day.. pano po ano po dapat kong gawin? help please.

[zee87]

Believe it or not... the easiest way is to find another one. Go on another date...  it may not totally remove the pain but it will help. Of course, that's when you're done with the usual "talking to your friends andfamily or getting a new hobby (lol)"

[IamCessy]

^Mahirap nga sis yung 8 years. Pero walang tutulong sa inyong iba kundi mga sarili niyo. Maghanap ng ibang paglilibangan. Pag naging busy, eventually, makakalimot din. Pero this takes time talaga.

Sis Mayah111, good thing naikwento mo dito kasi kung wala kang friends na mapagsabihan, mahirap sarilihin yan.

[iwannabeasupermodel]

Believe it or not... the easiest way is to find another one. Go on another date...  it may not totally remove the pain but it will help. Of course, that's when you're done with the usual "talking to your friends andfamily or getting a new hobby (lol)"

so true. plus you should cry it out sis. it will help you feel better afterwards. talk and talk about it with your friends. it's a form of release.

[kittypaw]

Advice ko, feel the pain, embrace it and use it as your reason para mawala ng tuluyan feelings mo sa ex mo. Wag mag pretend na masaya , basta use the pain as your weapon para mas maging stronger  i promise you youll get better much faster than acting as if walang nangyari.

[engr_neechee]

My worst heartbreak was in 2010.  Pero hindi kami five years nung guy.  More on 5 months lang talaga nagkasama pero hindi ko alam ano ang pinakain niya sa akin at super sakit.  Here are the things na nangyari/ginawa ko:

1.  Dahil iyak ako nang iyak at nagkataon pa na ang shifting schedule na napunta sa akin eh night (I was on network operations during that time), pagkalabas ko ng office, nagrorosaryo ako sa bus pauwi.  I'll get off sa St. Peter Parish sa Commonwealth.  Iyak ulit sa may front pew.  Then pagdating sa bahay, dasal ulit ng umiiyak.  I dunno pero I embraced the pain that way.  Probably, dahil nga inembrace ko yung pain, I got tired of it eventually.
2.  Binasa ko lahat ng libro ni Paulo Coelho.  Nung una kasi inadvise sa akin ng friend ko na each book has its way of showing you na "whatever you wish for eh matutupad."  Nung una gusto ko siyang bumalik kaya ko binasa lahat ng libro.  Eventually narealize ko na mataas ang value ko bilang babae and he's a total jerk.
3.  Pumunta ako ng Puerto Princesa ng Dec 2010, Laoag Vigan Pagudpud ng January 2011, Nagsasa Cove ng May 2011.  Nasa US ako buong August 2011.
4.  Nung natapos na ako sa lahat ng Paulo Coelho, si Mitch Albom at si Nicholas Sparks naman ang minarathon ko.

*special note:  Nakilala ko ang husband ko ng Sept 2011, naging bf ko siya ng Oct 2012 at kinasal kami sa San Sebastian ng Dec 2012.  I realized na God has his own way of leading us to his plans for us - not our plans for ourselves.

** another special note:  Bago ko naging bf ang asawa ko, some force led me to Padre Pio in Libis. 

[jakh]

Eto mga ginawa/ ginagawa ko sis dahil Im also in the process of moving on.
First two months I was crying everyday. Ang hirap dahil dito ako abroad tapos ilang months pa bago ako magbakasyon nangyare yun break up. Nung mga first few days parang di ko pa magrasp na break na kami, di ako makapaniwala na wala na kami kasi ikakasal na dapat kami eh.
What i did that time was pray and pray tapos I talked to a few of my trusted friends  para lang mairelease yung nararamdaman ko. But then dahil dinamdam ko talaga yung break up, ang ginawa ko next is nagsolo naman ako. Ninamnam ko yung pain. I told my friends na lie low muna ako sa mga lakad and meet ups namin and that gusto ko muna mapag isa at mag isip. I ate out alone, shopped alone, basta that time ang gastos ko, and ang mindset ko was Im gonna spoil myself. Nakatulong naman ng konti yung ganun but the best part was when I went home for vacation last month and spent the whole month with my family. Iba talaga ang family as support system.  May few times na Pinag usapan namin ng family ko yung mga nangyari and the relationship I had with my ex. The words of wisdom from my relatives lalo na yung galing sa mom and dad ko and having been given the chance to talk to them personally about it, yun na yung pinaka nagpagaan sa nararamdaman ko.
It's been 5 months since we broke up and from the initial denial stage during the first few months, im slowly on the road towards acceptance. I dont know how soon I will recover from this completely but I can say that I do feel better than I was a few months ago.
I pray everyday and have set goals for self-improvement. Dun lang ako nakafocus now.

Pray lang lagi sis and spoil and love yourself more. Spend more time din with your family.

[iamklarisse]

... gusto kong mabuo yung sarili ko but how? I can't even cry di pa ko umiiyak since that day.. pano po ano po dapat kong gawin? help please.

Pagdaanan mo lang sis lahat ng stages ng grieving: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance Kaya mo yan. *hugs*

[gc.garcia]

Feel all the pain till there's nothing more to feel sis.

The key to moving on is that you let yourself feel all the emotions , may it be love, sadness, anger or grief. Let it all out. Cry it all out hanggang sa mapagod ka. Pag pagod ka na, that's when you decide where to go.

Either you make this as a stepping stone to getting stronger or kryptonite that would weaken you.

It's all about the making choices.

I hope though that you choose the former and get stronger. There is more to life than wasting away because of a guy who can't keep it in his pants.

Marame pa jan sis. Believe me! Madame pa jan...

[Shadow Angel]

Kami 6 years ng ex ko. Paano maka move on. Walang shortcut pagdadaanan mo lahat. Denial, anger, acceptance. After nyan move on ka na ako sa less than 2 months naka move agad ako. Nagstart ako lumabas with friends. Actually nakipag meet ako ng new friends (girls) then dating na wala lang hindi para makaipag relationship ulit. After 9 months may bf ng bago. After 3 months kinasal kami now 2 years happily married. Magkakababy na rin kasi preggy ako ngayon. Sana ma inspire ka. Dito sa husband ko nabawi lahat ng sakit ng past ko.

[white_flag]

Kami naman 8 and a half months at napagod din siya. Wala naman daw other girl. Mga sis, nood din kayo ng vids ni Noah Elkrief sa Youtube. Nakakatulong sakin. Halos everyday akong nakikinig. Saka  syempre  pray to God talaga. Way din to na maging closer sa kanya.

[piatos]

Lahat ng stages ng depression pinagdaanan ko sis. Kapag naalala ko mga ginawa ko natatawa na lang ako hehe. No shortcuts talaga. Sabi nga real feelings dont go away easily but the heart gets tired too. Lagi mo iremind sarili mo bakit kayo naghiwalay hanggang manawa ka na lanb sa sakit. Until now single pa din ako, hindi ko pa rin nakikilala yung para sa akin. Nalulungkot minsan pero darating din siya. Tiwala lang

[Shadow Angel]

^tama pagdadaana talaga para masabing totally move ok ka na. Un sa akin kahit mabilis ilang weeks ako depress(denial stage) kaya lumbas ako at nakipag meet mg new friends.

[pinkmoscato]

-spend time with your loved-ones.
-restore your relationship with old friends
-make new friends
-learn new things, skills (cooking/baking), sports, language, etc.
-join a community with the same interest as yours.
-go on a date once you've learned to love yourself more.

[UglyPanda]

Heto ginagawa ko ngayon, pamper yourself. Gawa,ka ng bucketlist, gawin mo lahat. Enjoy mo muna sarili mo. 😊 kaya mo yan, fighting!

[arrabels]

Pa-share din ako. I'm also in the process of moving on from a relationship of almost 3 years. I know hindi sya ganun katagal compared sa 5 years nyo, but 3 years is still a long time. Two weeks before my ex and I broke up, I found out that he was flirting and slept with another girl that he met online.
And then the day after namin magka-ayos, I found out na dalawa pala kaming girlfriend nya. Mas nauna sakin yung isang girl, whom he said before na ex na nya, turned out they never broke up and they've been together since 2011. Naging kami nung 2014. Yeah, it was so f***ed up. Well anyway, it's been more than a month since we broke up. I cried my heart out the first few days, then hindi na ako naiiyak but it still hurts so I turned into writing. Everytime naiisip ko sya, or naalala, or may gusto akong sabihin, I would write it down. I told myself na i-memail ko sa kanya lahat ng naisulat ko once I finally move on. Pinagpatuloy ko din yung hobby ko, which is crafting. It keeps me busy especially on weekends when it gets lonely. I talk to my friends often, evertime I am tempted to message him, I would message my friends instead. Yung sasabihin ko dapat sa kanya, sa mga friends ko sinasabi. Travel helps din. Go out, punta ka sa dagat, akyat ka ng bundok, punta ka sa library. Basta be busy, and be awesome.

[heyitsmeabie]

Ako naman mag 5 yrs na sana kame.. then iniwan nya ko last year May to be exact.. mahirap saken kase nasa Singapore sya nun nung sinabe nya na may iba na.. and nakilala pa nya [textspeak!] girl year 2015, sa indonesia nung na assign sya dun.. [textspeak!] kong idea talaga na may iba kase sweet and caring naman talaga sya.. kaya super sakit nung ginawa nya kase nasa ibang bansa sya nung sinabe nya un.. and kaya sya nandun para daw sa future namin kase gusto na nyang makaipon for us.. daming pangako.. then iiwan din naman pala ko.. ngaun may gf na sya pero hindi [textspeak!] indonesian girl, andito na sya sa pinas ngaun and [textspeak!] bagong gf nya is kilala ko, nakaka work na nya un sa dati nyang company and friend din ng barkada nya.. wala until now, i'm still hurting.. lalo na pag naaalala ko [textspeak!] ginawa nya and kung pano ko na betray ng mga taong pinag kakatiwalaan ko.. aun sharing my experience lang. pero now, i'm working on myself to be better, focus sa work and lalong magpaganda, talk with friends, travel and lastly, PRAY.. gagaan loob mo unti unti everytime na kakausapin mo Siya.

[michipoo]

Hello TS!

I am also in the process of moving on, its almost a year already. So what I do while moving on  is i literally MOVE. I moved out of my comfort zone, I changed my number, nag travel ako, I looked for a new job, I spent more time with my friends and family, I learned how to appreciate other people. Hindi pa ako fully moved on, its a process at sabi ko sa sarili ko hindi ko mamadaliin, pero i am helping my self. Walang ibang makakatulong sayo kung di sarili mo.

[baliwsayo]

Buy ka ng Reflections of a Man by Amari Soul. ;-)

Alam mo mahirap talaga pero just give it time. Try to keep yourself busy with productive things. Learn a new skill or try a new sport or hobby. Nothing time cannot heal. And be thankful that you found out early that he is not the right guy for you. Yun iba kasi napapangasawa pa nila ang monster. So ikaw, swerte ka.