My daughter hates me.

[arkimommy]

My daughter is 18 years old, she's currently in London for studies. She grew up really close to me, we're best friends, open kami sa lahat ng bagay. Until nag-hiwalay kami ng dad niya, I had to leave her with him because I'm financially unstable that time and I know mas maganda future niya with her dad. She was really affected kaya umalis na siya papuntang London. At first okay kami, we have constant communication, I even visited her once. Originally plan ko na mag-migrate kami ng 2-month old bunso ko sa London next year, but I had a job offer sa ibang country and mas pinili ko yun because mas maganda benefits for my younger daughter. But before deciding, I explained everything to my eldest, I talked to her but she was really disappointed. I understand her reaction but dun na nag-start yung hatred niya towards me., feeling niya I chose her younger sister than her. I remember our last conversation sabi niya sakin, "I should've listened to dad. Masama kang tao. You're the worst person ever. I don't need you in my life. Get lost." and may iba pang hurtful words like mal*ndi etc and hindi niya accepted yung younger sister niya as her sister. Sa ask fm account naman niya may nag-tanong kung nasaan mom niya, she answered "I don't have a mom, she's dead". Grabe yung pain na na-feel ko when I read that. I tried calling her but naka-block na ako sa other social media accounts niya, even sa local number niya dun hindi ko na rin ma-contact.

I don't know what do. I know kasalanan ko, maybe I'm a bad mom nga talaga. I'm sorry I just had to post this because wala naman akong ibang mapag-sabihan. Sobrang sakit na ng ulo ko kakaisip. Hindi lang pala ako nawalan ng asawa, nawalan din ako ng anak. 😔

[three8one]

virtual hug sis.....nakakalungkot nga ang nangyari.

but I believed hindi pa huli ang lahat para mabawi mo yung trust ng anak mo sayo at sa palagay ko ang key dun ay yung kung ireconsider mo na  ituloy yung plan mo na mag migrate kayo ng isa mo pang anak kung nasaan yung eldest mo. doon mo na lang ipag sapalaran ang future ng bunso mo total naman maliit pa naman kamo sya kailangan pa nya ng mas madaming oras mo.

bat naman hindi matanggap ng eldest mo yung youngest mo? iba ba tatay nun? siguro nasabi nya lang yun gawa ng galit nga kasi siya. ang tao kasi pag galit ang umiiral, wala ng pinipiling salita na lumalabas sa bibig. hindi naman nya siguro mean yun. kailangan lang din siguro maipaunawa mo sa panganay mo yung mga bagay bagay na hindi nya lubos na maunaawan. wag ka lang magsawa magpaliwanag. dadating din ang time mag sisink in din sa kanya yun..

keep on praying na one day mabuksan ang puso ng anak mo at muli kayong makapag usap at magkaayos.

 

[shinies]

Nasundan kita sa thread nung nakikipaghiwalay ka pa lang sa asawa mo.

Sigurado ka ba na yan lang ang dahilan bakit galit sayo anak mo? Kasi sabi mo noon, naiintindihan ng anak mo yung mga problema niyo ng asawa mo.
Bakit ngayon eh bigla pareho na siya ng asawa mo pati kapatid niya isipin niya na iba ang ama? Ano nangyari bakit isipan ka niya na masama kang tao?

Masyado nang matanda ang 18 para mabrainwash ng tatay at dumating sa ganyan na tatakwil ka niya. Pupunta ka lang sa ibang bansa ganyan na siya? Hmmm...

[Msfi]

Sis don't ever stop trying in reaching out to your daughter, finds ways. Mag email ka, mag send ka ng message sa kung ano mang account pa mayron sya or make a blog where you can pour your heart out on how you feel for her. Write a message everyday if possible.  Para pag nagka-chance ulit kayong magka-usap you can let her read your blog.  Baka pag sinuwerte ka, mabasa nya kahit di pa kayo nagkaka-usap.   Assure her of your love for her, basta wag ka titigil. 

Basta ang anak hindi sinusukuan kahit ano pa ang mangyari.

[aquacharly]

It is unfortunate that she is beyond your reach -- so family counseling is out. 

Realistically,  just keep your lines open.  Send her regularly bday, Xma, whatever greeting cards.  Write a simple note like you always pray for her, and you pray too that 1 day she may understand your circumstances & hard choices & find it in her heart to forgive you.

There is nothing more hurtful than hard words from a child. But it is what it is.  Pray for Divine Guidance.