Cheating or not? What to do?

[nerib]

Hi Ladies,

It's been a tough week, sobrang lugmok ako and I really don't know what to do or kung ano paniniwalaan ko.

[textspeak!] husband ko kasi overseas bumalik kasi sa siya work last May ok naman lahat, I mean we've been through this ng matagal tagal na rin. Pero last week of July, parang iba [textspeak!] feeling ko "instinct" ba.  I'm okay sa paglabas labas niya kasi I mean he deserved it trabaho siya from M-F so need nya din ng break. Everytime na nagkakachat kami hindi ko maiwasan itanong [textspeak!] paglabas nya and nagdududa na talga ako. Last Sunday, un nga nalaman ko na meron nga ginagawa [textspeak!] asawa ko. Hindi ko siya kinausap nung araw na un kasi mataas pa emosyon ko and we might end up na nagsisigawan talga. Lumipas [textspeak!] ilang araw, come Tuesday we had a chance to talk as in usap ng maayos. Inamin niya sa akin na oo may namemeet daw siyang girls(younger and prettier) pero sabi niya hanggang [textspeak!] lang daw pag tingin nya na nagfafall na sa kanya umiiiwas na siya un lang daw un. Tapos sabi niya wag ko daw siya icocompare sa mga kaibigan nya kasi hindi siya nakikipagsex sa mga babae, kasi daw nirerespeto nya kami. Hayyysss....sakit sa ulo talga ni hindi ko matanggap [textspeak!] dahilan nya. Kasi kami daw mahal nya nung anak ko eh and importante kami sa kanya. Gusto kung maniwala pero di ko magawa, I mean kung mahal niya kami bat niya mgagawa un on the first place and ideny pa kami di ba. Humingi siya sa akin ng sorry ngpaliwanag, pero nahihirpan akong maniwala na.

Pagkatapos, sabi niya hindi na daw ba siya pwedeng magkaroon ng kaibigang babae nkakaloka talga. Tapos ngaun nga nagpaalam siya sa akin kung pwede siyang lumabas, gosh I can't do anything naman umoo o humindi ko malay ko ba ano gagawin niya kasi malayo siya .May sinasabi siya sa akin na ang isipin ko lang daw eh mahal niya kami ni baby at kami lang daw importante..."iba daw ang family compared sa lahat ng outside factors". Iba kasi dating sa akin ng sinasabi niya it seems dinedefend nya [textspeak!] ginagawa nya.

Just to give you a brief background, 7 years ago ngkaroon na rin kami ng problem na ganito pero that time magbf palang kami pero pinili kng magstay and ipaglaban kung ano meron kame.

How can I trust him again? Mukhang di niya kayang iwan [textspeak!] gawain niyang ganyan? Paano nya nasasabing mahal nya  kami? Flirting is considered cheating right?
 

 

[handlewithcare]

Yes, flirting is cheating. Pero may mga tao na ang pananaw nila, hanggang walang sex na nangyayari, hindi cheating yon. Kung bf mo pa lang sana, madaling sabihin na hiwalayan mo na. Kc hindi lang flirting ang kasalanan sayo. Nagsisinungaling pa, binibilog ulo mo sis. Sabi nila, if someone treats you like an option, leave him like a choice. Pero asawa mo na at may anak pa kayo. Kaya God bless and be strong na lang sis. Sana maging maayos uli kayo.

[eimerej5]

Hello sis! I feel for you. Lalo na malayo si hubby and you don't know kung ano ba talaga ang ginagawa nya. I read this article and it is so true, - Adulterous affairs don't begin with sleeping together; they begin with inappropriate friendships. Friendships and emotional attachment with people of the opposite sex can spell danger in your marriage. Protect your marriage by avoiding private communication and intimate conversation with people of the opposite sex. BEWARE OF WORKMATES who seem too concerned with your personal private life. Those that tell you - " let me know if you need anything" beware of those that give you exaggerated and suggestive compliments about the way you look. Regardless of what is happening in your marriage, don't let the devil get a foothold in your marriage by falling victim to this trap. Let your workmates, friends, acquaintance etc that there are things you won't tolerate. Keep a healthy physical, social, emotional distance between you and the opposite sex.

And cheating doesn't begin by sleeping together. A simple text that you erase because you're partner might see it, well, you are already there....

These are the things that i read which makes sense to me. I am sure wala lang peace of mind dahil naiisip mo si hubby and what he is doing in his free time. Since you are far away and can't di anything, give yourself some slack. Try to trust him kahit konti lang. He maybe friends with the opposite sex and he really is telling the truth. Get to know kung sino yung girl. Like pagkwentuhin mo cya then habang ngchikahan kayo bigla mo ask, ano nga na name nung friend mo? Be calm. Pretend that everything is alright kahit na deep inside gusto mo nang sakalin yung girl. Hehe! You have to play the understanding wife to get informations from him. That's what i did then nung may nakuha n akong proof that is when i really confrontated him para walang lusot!

Hope this helps you a bit. goodluck sis! Godbless!