Tips for first time parents - How to deal with sleep deprivation with newborn?

[andy2014]

Hi mga sis! I'm a FTM. Sa mga moms dyan, gaano katagal si baby bago humaba haba ang tulog nya? Baby is now 4 weeks and he wakes up every 1.5hrs to 2hrs. Kakapagod. Maswerte na ako kapag nakaka 4 hrs of sleep a day ako - hindi pa yan straight 4 hrs. CS ako kaya ang hirap lalo nung 1st few weeks. Kasi nagpapagaling pa ako. Ang hirap ng puyat. We have a home business kaya nag wowork ako ng 3hrs a day. Kailangan eh. Pero since laging gising si baby. Hindi ako nakakawork  Natritrigger ang anxiety ko sa puyat at pagod. Any tips? Does it get better in time?   TIA

[caterpillar-girl]

I feel you sis. My baby is 10 weeks old and CS din ako. I'm still struggling with sleep deprivation. My OB prescribed iron supplements. It really does help keep my strength and energy up. Try it baka makatulong sayo. Also, try to pump for a bottle or two and have someone feed the baby while you nap for a bit. I'm pretty sure it will get better in time.

[closetqueen]

Hi sis. Im a first-time mom too. Ngayon 3 months na si baby and I can really say na the first 6 weeks are challenging. I wake up once or twice ng madaling araw to feed or sometimes nagigising lang siya sa slight mov't namin ni hubby (kasi we co-sleep) kaya iiyak at isasayaw mo na naman para makatulog, pero ngayon hindi na. I guess Im lucky kasi sabi nila youll have your sleep back when baby's around 6 months na or older. But here's what I did anyway. I keep a regular schedule and Im strict about it. When the clock strikes 7, nasa kwarto na kami ni baby. Pinupunasan ko siya using wipes, I change her clothes put on her diaper and jammies tapos I lay her on the bed. Pagkatapos niyan matutulog na siya after. Minsan nagpapalambing pa, gusto tabihan ko pero no more sayaw2 and all. And she's barely 3 months nung maging routine namin yan. I know every baby's different but try it anyway.

[nicoletta]

My LO is turning 4 months soon and I am still sleep deprived    I know my LO will get the best with my breastmilk but I'm not sure how long I can hold on to this.  I have gone back to work less than 2 months after I had my emergency CS and I'm getting anxiety attacks and bouts of depression.

In lieu of breastmilk, has anyone here considered powdered milk narin?

[belle_v2g]

^have you been pumping at work sis?

[skela96c]

I didnt have anybody to help me with the baby until i have to go back to work. So ako lahat the first 10weeks. As in lahat. Puyat sa gabi, sa umaga naglalaba, linis, paligo, etc. As in round the clock ako.  I wasnt even able to take a decent bath; pag nandyan lang husband ko, but even then mabilisan pa din dahil i attend naman to other household chores-- even cleaning the bathroom. CS pa ko nyan.

So the best advise is to have someone you trust to stay with you. Best is your mom or mil. Or have a trusted friend visit you - not to chat but to baby sit. Hehe.

As for breastfeeding, i stopped at 5week. Dahil nga din i think i didnt have enough rest and didnt have anybody to prep food properly, konti to nothing ang supply ko. I tried pumping. Wala din. So we had to formula feed. Na additional work din because then i had to sterilize pa. But somehow, it restored my sanity. Nappressure kasi ako noon to produce milk for my 8.1lbs baby, kulang na kulang ang supply ko kaya nasstress ako lalo pag umiiyak sya, sya naman nasstress din kasi gutom na nga sya kaya lalo umiiyak. Looking back i dont know pano namin naitawid yung first 2months.

Now at 4mos, happy na kami. We have worked out a schedule and im already back to work. Tama, make a routine and stick to it.   Train your LO to take cues (sponge bath, lights off means bedtime, etc).  Pag nagigising sya sa madaling araw, at alam kong hindi gutom, hindi namin sya pinapansin. Para alam nyang hindi playtime ng ganong oras.

[andy2014]

Ako mix feeding ako since birth kasi yung pedia, sabi wag daw muna iroom in si baby kasi I have to recover muna so they fed my son formula. Tapos after 4-5 days pa lumabas gatas ko, hindi ko naman pwede gutumin ang anak ko. Minsan it helps na formula kasi si husband naman mag pakain pero si baby he cannot sleep without nursing so mahirap kasi kelangan ko sya ibreastfeed.

[izabelle]

Mahirap talaga kapag newborn. I think yung unang 3 months pinaka mahirap. We managed to survive though. Ang ginagawa namin ng hubby ko nun, shifting kami haha! so example sya mag aalaga sa umaga, ako sa gabi and vice versa. Para parehas may pahinga.

I remember though nung 1st month, parehas talaga kaming sleep deprive.

[ri-anne]

Some tips, base from experience

1. Welcome all the help you can get (luto, linis, laba, etc) so you can focus on your newborn

2. Pag tulog si baby, as much as possible,  sabayan mo at matulog ka rin (doesn't matter what time it is, you need to rest as well)

3. If you're breastfeeding, learn how to breastfeed lying down sideways.

4. Have a routine every night leading to sleeping time. This was effective w/ my 2nd baby because all of us have to sleep na at a certain time, including my 1st child coz may school the next day, so gumaya na rin sya.
Before one year she sleeps through the night na. Dapat din baby should have enough on the tummy at para hindi gutumin at gumising in the middle of the night.

5. I co-slept with my baby. Hindi nagamit yung crib kasi i found it troublesome na patayo tayo. And parang mas mahaba tulog nila pag alam nilang may katabi sila (or maybe it's just me)


So far yun lang naaalala ko. Good luck first time moms... And don't worry.. That's just a phase... Time flies soooo fast... Before you know it magugulat ka na lang at anlaki na ng baby mo and you'll miss those times when you can easily carry your baby in your arms...

[daisy_duck]

My LO is turning 4 months soon and I am still sleep deprived    I know my LO will get the best with my breastmilk but I'm not sure how long I can hold on to this.  I have gone back to work less than 2 months after I had my emergency CS and I'm getting anxiety attacks and bouts of depression.

In lieu of breastmilk, has anyone here considered powdered milk narin?

It happened to me sis. I got over it when I have accepted and gave formula milk to my lo. For me our Lo needs a healthy mom more than our breastmilk. My lo is now 15 mos, formula fed na. I pressured myself on breastfeeding him as long as I can however due to sleep deprivation, like I get 2-3 hrs sleep a day tapos hindi pa straight yan, my milk supply depleted and because of the hormonal changes, I developed anxiety attacks, depression.

[momentum]

When I gave birth to my daughter, ako rin lahat lahat..my mom was not with me that time, minsan lang bumibisita si MIL and kahit 4 na anak niya medyo parang baguhan siya and old school/pang province alam niyang pag aalaga. masyadong complicated and puro mga provincial ways lang nasabi niya sakin na gawin (yung mga pang iwas multo etc  )

so I had to stand up on my own and learn the hard way everyday. hindi ko pa pa alam na may gt nun at wala rin net sa bahay hehe. this is what I did while I was on maternity leave:

1. Like what others said here, make a sched and stick to it. as soon as 6am gising na ako. habang tulog pa si baby I cook breakfast na, eat, chop the food for lunch, shower. Every 3-4 days I also make babad na the clothes of baby that I will hand wash in the afternoon when she takes a nap.

2. once baby wakes up, breastfeed, then ipa araw sa back and front for about 15-20 minutes I think. Bring her back to the room, let her just lie down while I do some other stuff in the room like fix stuff, plancha clothes, finish breakfast if napaaga gising niya etc. 

3. Bath time I think was around 10 or 11..basta patanghali na. after that breastfeed uli then she would nap. This is the time I cook lunch and eat..and do other stuff like handwash her/our clothes. If there is nothing else to do then I take a nap too or watch tv.basta those hours are precious haha! dami kong naiisip gawin

4. Before 4pm I wake her up na. My mom said to train babies sa oras ng gising at tulog...don't let them be na kung kelan lang sila gigising at matutulog dahil tayo rin mahihirapan. and it's true..if I let my baby sleep as long as until 6pm nako, puyatan na yun sa gabi. syempre I make sure naman hindi siya bitin sa sleep. pero basta 4pm palang I make light noises na sa room like I walk around, move something gently..basta soft noises lang that will wake her up in a good mood. breastfeed then I bring her out and make pasyal..para mahanginan..talk to the plants and trees LOL. then go back to the room and make punas.

5. by 5pm my MIL comes to visit. so this is the time I cook dinner. if ever naman she is not around I just keep the room open so I can hear and see baby while cooking. I remember that when she turned 2 months ata she had this 7pm habit of crying haha and it will last for an hour. ilang weeks din ganun. the first weeks sobrang stressed ako coz nothing would make her stop. pero eventually nasanay na and then the habit just went away. panay karga ko lang and sing. of course I consulted her pedia about this and they said normal lang yun and mawawala rin naman that habit. and so it did..

6. keep them awake as late as possible..kasi the later they sleep, the more you will get a good night's sleep without them crying or waking up. I remember my daughter used to sleep at around 8:30 or 9 na ata..maybe coz she had a good afternoon nap rin naman..and her body adjusted na to the schedule so hindi mahirap for her or napipilitan to stay awake. because of this, she would only ask for milk 1x in the middle of the night..and I just breasfeed her lying down. she sleeps beside me btw. so masarap tulog ko I did not have problems with breastfeeding thank God! kahit unang nainom niya is formula milk while I was still asleep at the hospital, okay lang..kasi as soon as I woke up I tried and tried talaga na magbreastfeed and when we went home no formula na talaga para magproduce na ako ng milk.

So far yun yung mga naalala ko. I miss those times

[chelgeneroso]

Naalala ko, nung 35 or 36 weeks pregnant ako, nag start na ang puyatan ko. tuwing 9pm ang likot likot na ni baby sa loob ng tummy ko. Ang lakas sumipa, nakaupo na ako matulog nung 36 weeks. hingang malalim kapag napapasipa ng malakas. Hindi ko naman expect na hanggang sa pag-labas nya, ganun pa rin sleep pattern nya. 9pm gising sya hanggang 2am. tapos ayaw nya sa aircon.

hanggang 10 weeks ata kami puyatan. Then nagkaroon na sya ng sleep pattern, medyo nakakatulog na ako ng straight 4 hrs. Mix feeding ako, sa gabi ako breast feed, sa umaga formula.

Nakatulong ng malaki ang yaya sa akin, kapag gising si baby, nasa kanila. ako naman tulog dahil puyat. gigisingin lang ako kapag gutom na si baby.

[choco_monster]

I can so relate to this.  Just wanna share also. In 3 days, 4 months na din baby ko but until now I’m still sleep deprived.  I sleep 2-4 hours a day. Hindi pa yan straight. 
-   I started to get back to work nung 3 months na si baby. Yung helper namin nagaalaga sa kanya from 12 noon to 11 pm.  I work mid shift kase. 
-   The entire day mas madalas tulog si baby and he cant sleep na hindi karga, So yaya would carry her straight 3-4 hours.  If malalapag nya si baby to eat, pee, etc, mahaba na 30 minutes magigigsing na sya after.
-   When he wakes up, konting laro, say 30 mins then sleep na ulit. Mas gusto patulugin ng  yaya yung baby kase iyak lang daw ng iyak.
-   At 9 pm gigisingin na sya para pagdating ko, latch na agad sakin. 
-   At 11pm, right after ko magbihis, start na feeding session namin ni baby hanggang 7am yun. Dahil tulog sya maghapon, gising naman sya  from 1am to 7am. 
-   Sometimes nakaka tulog din ako sabay sa kanya one to two hours but since lagi kulang nauuwi kong milk sa bahay (less than 10 oz), i have to pump naman.  As soon as Im done,  mgigising naman sya then latch again.  Side lying naman kame pero hindi rin kase ako makatulog while he’s latching.
-   At 7am matutulog na kame then I have to wake up at 1030 because I have to bathe him. In between that nagigising ako kase si baby from time to time kase ginagawa akong pacifier.
Ang hirap kase hindi malakas supply ko ng gatas kaya sobrang trying hard para hindi sya mag formula. I hope pag 6 months na sya, maging mas okay na.

[Miss Granger]

- Hi mga mommies, i'm about to give birth by June and parang isa sa mga fears ko tong mga ganitong situation. Im a FTM too. Hubby nasa work pag gabi so parang I have to deal with it on my own. I'm thinking na of the worst like wala kami makuhang yaya or taga alaga na kamag anak since malayo sila MIL sakin and hindi din sila mag stay with me ng matagal since my work din sila. Parang my chance din ako ma depress lalo na pag mag cry cry si LO ng non-stop kasi hindi ko pa alam kung pano mag handle ng ganung situation. 

- skela, feeling ko ganyan mangyayari sakin. Parang magiging round the clock din ako. Gusto ko din kasi ako mag asikaso mismo ng household chores as much as possible.

- I know everything will fall into place naman eventually. I'll try din yung mga tips niyo dito, keep it coming pa mga mommies, thanks! 

[andy2014]

- Hi mga mommies, i'm about to give birth by June and parang isa sa mga fears ko tong mga ganitong situation. Im a FTM too. Hubby nasa work pag gabi so parang I have to deal it on my own. I'm thinking na of the worst like wala kami makuhang yaya or taga alaga na kamag anak since malayo sila MIL sakin and hindi din sila mag stay with me ng matagal since my work din sila. Parang my chance din ako ma depress lalo na pag mag cry cry si LO ng non-stop kasi hindi ko pa alam kung pano mag handle ng ganung situation. 

- skela, feeling ko ganyan mangyayari sakin. Parang magiging round the clock din ako. Gusto ko din kasi ako mag asikaso mismo ng household chores as much as possible.

- I know everything will fall into place naman eventually. I'll try din yung mga tips niyo dito, keep it coming pa mga mommies, thanks! 

Hi sis, ayaw kitang takutin pero I wish I listened to family and friends' warning. Noong buntis ako, I only took in yung happy side ng parenting. new baby, ang cute, ang saya saya. Although I knew na mahirap maging new mom, I would say I under estimated motherhood. ang hirap hirap pala, yes masaya, pero ang hirap nakakapagod talaga. Roller coaster ang emotion mo. I would suggest, get help. mahirap ang mag isa. Si husband ko nag leave sya ng first 2 weeks pero mahirap pa din, andito ang MIL ko, minsan mother ko pero mahirap pa din kasi ikaw talaga ang primary care giver ni baby. So get help now.

[Miss Granger]

Hi sis andy, kaya nga kinakausap ko na si hubby kung ano ba magiging plans namin para paglabas ni baby ready naman na kami kahit paano like saan ba ako uuwi, who will look after me habang nasa recovery period etc. Sana andito pa din si mommy para less alala ko  I'm really afraid right now, i have to admit na need namin ng help esp after ML balak ko bumalik din sa work. Pag wala ka pa naman tulog parang ang laki ng kulang hahaha. Pero sis , congrats ha puro positive thoughts ka. 

[andy2014]

Hi sis andy, kaya nga kinakausap ko na si hubby kung ano ba magiging plans namin para paglabas ni baby ready naman na kami kahit paano like saan ba ako uuwi, who will look after me habang nasa recovery period etc. Sana andito pa din si mommy para less alala ko  I'm really afraid right now, i have to admit na need namin ng help esp after ML balak ko bumalik din sa work. Pag wala ka pa naman tulog parang ang laki ng kulang hahaha. Pero sis , congrats ha puro positive thoughts ka. 

masaya magka baby, fulfilling pero super nakakapagod at nakakapuyat. bangenge ka talaga kasi kulang ka tulog 24/7 kailangan ka ni baby. My sister gave birth 6 months before I did, every time na kukwento ako ng struggles ko, she would say, "naku ganyan talaga, ganyan din ako noon" sabi ko bakit hindi mo sinabi na ganito kahirap haha sabi nya ayaw nya ako mastress kasi buntis ako. haha  pero sabi naman ni ate ako, it would get better. Yung baby nya started sleep through the night (5-6 hours straight) at around 4-5 months. Tska kapag nag reresponse na si baby, tawa na ngiti na, mas masaya na daw hehe.

[caterpillar-girl]

Miss Granger, like sis andy, ako din when I was pregnant I only focused on the good and fun side of being a new mom. I underestimated how hard it was going to be. I remember crying over breakfast one time kasi I was so exhausted over the lack of sleep. Wala kaming yaya nung una pero buti nalang I had my mom to help me. Pero still, ako parin halos lahat. There was a time every other day lang ako naliligo, and kumakain ako sobrang late na. When we got a yaya mejo gumaan naman ng onti and now that my baby is 11 weeks old nakapagsettle na kami sa routine.

I guess another advice would be, take care of your health. Kumain ka ng madami even if wala kang gana. If you're sleep deprived, you have to eat well to keep your immunity and your energy up.

When you feel overwhelmed, practice deep breathing. Kalma ka lang lagi kasi nasesense din ng babies natin when we are stressed. Kawawa naman sila if maoverwhelm tayo and we take it out on them. Napaka helpless nila. Yon lagi ko iniisip kapag naooverwhelm ako. It calms me down whenever I remind myself na hindi naman ginusto ng baby na mabuhay sya and these first few weeks are scary and overwhelming for her too. It's our job bilang mommy to provide them peace and comfort

[skela96c]

- skela, feeling ko ganyan mangyayari sakin. Parang magiging round the clock din ako. Gusto ko din kasi ako mag asikaso mismo ng household chores as much as possible.

ay nako sis, eventually you will have to learn how to let go    wapakels na sa medyo makalat na bahay, ang importante makapagpahinga ka.  minsan you have to choose, ligo o tulog. siempre dun ka sa tulog. mahal ka pa din ng asawa at anak mo kahit di ka maligo, pero mahirap mahalin ang krung krung dahil sa pagod. hehe, kidding. but yeah, you will know how to prioritize and let some things slide.  some things can wait. 

[andy2014]

Miss Granger, like sis andy, ako din when I was pregnant I only focused on the good and fun side of being a new mom. I underestimated how hard it was going to be. I remember crying over breakfast one time kasi I was so exhausted over the lack of sleep. Wala kaming yaya nung una pero buti nalang I had my mom to help me. Pero still, ako parin halos lahat. There was a time every other day lang ako naliligo, and kumakain ako sobrang late na. When we got a yaya mejo gumaan naman ng onti and now that my baby is 11 weeks old nakapagsettle na kami sa routine.

I guess another advice would be, take care of your health. Kumain ka ng madami even if wala kang gana. If you're sleep deprived, you have to eat well to keep your immunity and your energy up.

When you feel overwhelmed, practice deep breathing. Kalma ka lang lagi kasi nasesense din ng babies natin when we are stressed. Kawawa naman sila if maoverwhelm tayo and we take it out on them. Napaka helpless nila. Yon lagi ko iniisip kapag naooverwhelm ako. It calms me down whenever I remind myself na hindi naman ginusto ng baby na mabuhay sya and these first few weeks are scary and overwhelming for her too. It's our job bilang mommy to provide them peace and comfort

ako andito pa din ako sa stage na ito. May day/s na hindi ako nakakaligo, quick linis lang ng katawan kasi sobrang busy kay baby. Hehe Puyat pa din, pagod til now. Im just 2 pounds away sa pre-pregnancy weight ko sa sobrang puyat at pagod sa pag aalaga. Although sobrang mahirap, masaya naman.