Problems You Encounter Wile Planning Your Wedding Part 8

[Chili1113]

Here is a link to the previous thread:
http://www.femalenetwork.com/girltalk/index.php/topic,290248.580.html

My current problem now is still our guest list. We are 75% done addressing our invitations. My fiance has 4x more guests and invitees than me.

[msdianne]

Same sentiment Chili especially now we're adapting Chinese wedding. All of a sudden changes in our original guest list is driving me crazy. I don't know and sasabihin sila naman mag pay ng extra. Makes me want to have elopement wedding instead.

[meixin]

^Mine din. Most of the guests will be my fiance's dad's guests. Although for me, I don't really mind. I've come to accept that in chinese weddings, the parents view weddings as for the their benefit and sometimes use it to impress. So as long as I get the details that really I want, then I won't object to whomever they want to invite. I just hope there won't be so much association rituals on the day..

[vhena14]

hi sis Chili1113, problem nga yan, imagine... 4x mas madami? have you ever tried to talk to him about this one? Try to communicate and tell him directly your sentiments... anyway you two are about to get married and I think you should compromise with the number of guests you will invite... For me kasi, I have bigger family that's why I allowed h2b na maginvite ng High School classmates nya na never heard and never met... ako na ang nagsabi sa kanya na since mas madami akong kamag-anak, I allowed him to invite his own friends but not exceeding 10 people (to make us even). that makes us 55 guests for me, 55 guests for him, then common friends the rest of the 150 pax.  There is no way out but to compromise.... pero kung nainvite na nya? OMG 

[mrsdeezon]

i feel you sis in terms of guestlist dilemma. whenever we talk about it, we end up fighting.
the issue with my hubby is wala syang friends masyado and his family is not keen to travel to tagaytay (he's based in Pampanga) despite us providing transportation to and fro. we want an intimate wedding of 100 guests - so far he has 34 confirmed attendees, i have 45. he has 2 aunties who asked to bring along 2/3 other amigas who we do not know and we have not met ever. he argued that we let it go since he doesn't have enough guests naman I argued that rules are rules, we cannot give seats to people we do not know personally. that i would prefer having only 50 guests on the day as long as we know them all. he asked if it will really annoy me to see the 4/6 'extra' guests on our wedding day and i realized hindi naman siguro. i just feel that we could've just invited other friends who we actually know instead of giving the seats to the extras. 

[vhena14]

^awww, maybe because he can't say no to aunties... my mom has this tendency, when we announced the wedding, she said invite this one, invite that one, I complained and she defended, then I told my dad, he said "magpakatalino ka... bakit ka magpapakain ng hindi mo kilala?"
then one day Mom hinted to one of her amigas na I'm getting married and Dad was there, nagalit sya, haha, pagkauwi nila nag argue sila... until Dad's last word was "don't invite if you're not paying! If you are paying, take them to a resto, not to your daughter's wedding! She barely knows that people!" Just sharing! 

[meixin]

^ awww sweet dad. Sad na nagaway sila about that pero happy na he's looking out for you

[vhena14]

^my dad never shouts naman, kaya parang wala lang, simpleng discussion lang yung dating, and my Mom is not answering kapag alam na nyang mali sya... 

[corpse_bride]

Oh my. Nakakaloka naman ang mga amiga ng mga tita. That's still 4-6 people that you don't know & that you'll be paying dinner/lunch for. Just be firm with what you've decided on beforehand. No matter how big or small that amount is(for amigas food), meron pa din better expense for that or possible savings.

[rowan]

Chili1113,

This is the first time Ive heard that the groom has more guests than the bride haha;p Anyway, I think I remember you saying before that your venue cannot accommodate all the people you plan to invite so youre wishing most of them will say no. Wont that be a big problem if lets say the number of confirmed guests still exceeds the max capacity of your venue? Thats something you can say to your fiance. Sakit ng ulo with only 2 mos to go! Hugs!

[alexmack]

Guest list din sakin mga sis.

Just a few minutes ago nung naglista ako. I was just wonderin kung inimbita ba nyo lahat ng kamag anak nyo? Nung una kasi napagusapan namin ni h2b na 50 lang ang guests namin, mga super important people lang. Hanggang sa maalala nya yung friends nya sa dating workplace nya na naging friends ko din later on, so included na sila but that I didn't bother counting kung ilan sila. Basta nag set lang ako ng 80guests max. Period. Pero yun nga, kanina lang naglista ako at 84 na lahat sila.

Hindi lahat yun gusto ko na nasa wedding ko actually. Nailista ko lang dahil nga anak sila ng tito or tita ko at baka magtampo pag dko ininvite.

Ayun, hanggang ngayon hindi pa rin final yung list coz I still have to consult my h2b about it.

[SARAHnghae]

pinakamahirap na part ang pag limit ng guests especially if you have a limited budget too. ang naging dilemma namin dati, yung parents namin ni hubby may mga kamag-anak or friends sila na gusto nilang imbitahin namin sa kasal, whom ayaw naman namin imbitahin or they're are just not that significant para ma-invite sa wedding namin.

in the end, ang couple pa rin ang may last say sa guestlist. consider niyo yung budget, and how were they significant to you as a couple.

this might help
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/74/b6/b5/74b6b53015f7575dd6b65a713059eb73.jpg

[prettylove]

Same dilemma here. Feeling ko nga pakonti ng pakonti guest ko sa dami ng guest ni fiance ko. Anyway, recount again and again. i also don't want a big wedding that's why i'm sticking to my 150 guests only, kapag sinabi ko kay fiance na wag isama si ganto ganyan and for adults only, uu naman sya. Fiance is also ma-pr as in mr congeniality to everyone but sorry sya kasi snobbish ako at alam nya na intimate wedding lang ang gusto ko. At first i only want 100 guests but because of fiance's overwhelming friends nadagdagan. So tama na siguro na pinagbigyan ko sya sa 150
anyway, sis may i ask if for example you have a relative (auntie/uncle) with children ages from 12-16 sinasama nyo pa ba sa rsvp? Or parents lang ang invite nyo? Strictly for adults kasi ang gusto ko and for me it means 18 and above? Hindi ba maoffend ang relative if you exclude their children sa rsvp? Thanks!

[alexmack]

^yan din sis ang nasa isip ko e. Kasi lahat ng kapatid ng father ko sinama ko na then napansin ko na lang na pati anak nila at mga asawa ng anak at mga apo. Kasi nga baka kapag may hindi naisama e magtampo..

Aayusin ko na lang ulit sis. Mag stick na lang ako sa 80 guests. Hehe

[prettylove]

^hehe same pala tayo sis ganun din ngyari sa akin when i did my guest list hanggang sa narealize ko na baka maging children's playground and party na ang wedding namin hehe kaya nagsabi na ako kay fiance na no kids, un nga lang i'm thinking kung isasama ko pa pati ang mga teenagers? Hmm..

[meixin]

I think it's fine if you stick to the mr and mrs. (except maybe if you got their kid as one of your entourage). Maintindihan naman siguro nila yun...

[alexmack]

^siguro sis kung sa tingin natin itong si guest will make our weddings more fun and memorable, invite natin. Pero kung hindi, wag na lang.
Okay lang kaya sabihin ko sa mga kapatid ng parents na I can only alot two or three seats per family? Ano sa palagay nyo sis?

[vhena14]

^hi sis, I think you can specify (lalo na sa RSVP) na 2 or 3 lang ang seats na maibibigay nyo... dito pumapasok si mommy ko eh, sya ang call and text brigade ko sa family ko... sya magsasabi na 2 seats lang ang alloted, sya din ang mag eexplain bakit hindi allowed ang bata at bakit 2 seats lang... na limited ang seats at intimate lang ang wedding... I think it all comes down to communication, para walang magtampo at walang mga batang patakbo takbo sa ceremony 

[marbleslice]

^ i like that approach your mom did ha para talagang sigurado! i can also relate coz my h2b's tito's and tita's have big families. and we'll be having an intimate wedding. so we also plan to just allot like around 2-4 heads per family to those na hindi na ka-close. because even my h2b couldn't remember nga all his cousins' names, tapos iinvite pa ba namin. then low priority yung nasa province na.

[alexmack]

^gayahin kita sis vhena14.. hindi ko din naman kasi gusto na madami tapos hindi din naman lahat ka-close. Ang gusto ko nga sana kung magiinvite ako ng cousins, yung kilala na ni h2b at naka-bonding na nya dati.