Suitor Issues - Any help is welcomed

[sparklingjewel]

If you dont mind him not spending on you, that's great. But what i find bothering is 35 na sya, mababa pa sweldo nya? NGEK. Baka 40 na yan wala pang pangkasal sayo. For me dapat by around 27 a guy (or girl, for that matter) is stable na and kaya na magsupport sa sarili and potentially a family.

[lonelymiss28]

hindi issue ang pera pag nanliligaw ang lalaki, gagawa at gagawa yan ng paraan para ma-impress ka sa kanya. Including na doon ay yung ilibre ka man lang and make sure na you will feel special. May mga mas bata pa ngang mamliligaw sobrag iipunin ang baon para lang mai-date yung nililigawan nila na sila magbabayad. Dahilan na lang yung maliit ang sweldo.

[Girltalker2]

Tsaka TS, sobrang turn off naman na ikaw pa mag oorder ng food para sa inyong dalawa?  Worse is abutan ka pa ng Php100?  Usually, pag start palang kayo nagkakakilala, the least he could do is ikaw muna magreserve ng seat while sya mag order. Ito baliktad. Kapal naman ng mukha nya.

[karla1o]

I agree sa mga sisses here na magulo nga si TS. If money isn't a big deal then why even bother to include the KKB thing?
Obvious na rin na gusto mo na talaga, go for it. Unconditional love it is. lol

[Shadow Angel]

Hahaha nakakaloka marami ng mauutak na guy ngayon ang hinahanap na girl ay stable na hindi katulad dati na ang girl ang pumipili ng guy na stable na. Tapos kapag asawa mo na or bf na biglang boom wala ng work keso hindi makahanap ng ibang work tapos  may excess baggage pa may kakilala ako ganyan ang hanap na gf/wife may kaya sa buhay kapag asawa mo na kasi hanggat kaya mag tiis na walang work ang asawa mag tiis naku sis kung hindi ganyan ang pangarap mong buhay may asawa lumayo ka na asap

[purple.strawberry]

Sis medyo nakakarelate ako sa'yo. Gusto ko kasi financially independent ako but gusto ko pa din makita yung willingness nung guy to spend for me, it's the thought that counts ba.

Yung bf ko ngayon when we were dating parang KKB na rin ang setup namin e, just different lang ng konti. Hal siya sagot this date, sa susunod ako naman, so palitan lang kami. Did it bother me? Yes, and after he presented this setup I actually thought of dumping him then. But I guess I liked him enough that I didn't. So nilet go ko na lang. And since hinayaan ko ng ganun kami I didn't let it bother me na ulit. I guess kita ko naman kasi yung dedication niya for me thru services (sa love language ba) and he offers naman din ilibre ako sa mga out of town if meron extra money. Di regular income ni bf, more on freelancing kasi siya (we're currently working on this kasi siyempre di pwedeng ganun lang).

So I guess sis depende yan sa'yo. If it bothers you talaga eh di siguro much better na dump him na lang. Ordinarily naman talaga the guy impresses the girl muna and spends for everything e.

What bothers me is that 35 na yang suitor mo but mababa pa rin sweldo. At that age dapat stable na ang income, aba 30s marrying age na yan, ano mabibigay niyan sa'yo if kayo na?

[ohcmon]

IMO 'di naman issue na dutch kayo, pero sana man lang sa first two or three dates, nag-effort siya ilibre kahit sa Jollijeep lang (), hindi 'yung kahit minsan sa loob ng 3 months ay hindi ka niya nailibre.

Kahit naman siguro mababa sahod niya, magagawan niya ng paraan to set aside kahit P100 or P200 panlibre sa'yo, makapagpakitang-gilas man lang siya. Men want to please the women they want to pursue. The fact that he does not exert this effort, baka hindi ka niya ganun ka-like.

Hindi rin ako bilib dun sa idea na tinetest ka lang niya kung mukha kang pera by not making you libre. Siya 'tong nanliligaw, siya pa talaga magtetest sa'yo?! Lol

[harley18]

Why do people need to say this is not PEX? Yes, this is GT, open to any topic. Hindi lang naman pera yun issue, about din sa personality nun guy.

Back to topic. TS, yes, nakakaturn-off sya. Nagreregalo ba sya sayo, like flowers, chocolates?

First of all, this is not PEX sis.

To TS: this is not PEX to begin with . As for your issue...

nalito ako dun kala ko nasa ibang forum na ko or may affiliated ng ibang forum ang FN/GT..

[ohcmon]

^ I think you misunderstood the PEx reference. PEx is Pinoy Exchange, another online forum like GT. The other members pointed that out lang just to make it clear to TS and to the other readers that this is GT, not PEx.

[skela96c]

Hi TS, are you sure the guy is courting you?

Kasi sa style nya, parang tropa lang kayo. Yung papapilahin ka nya sa fastfood tapos aabutan ng pera good for his own meal, pang barkada yun eh.

For a guy, kahit mababa sweldo nyan magpapaimpress naman yan kahit pano.  And if, at his age, wala talaga syang pera the least he could do is to be honest with you na 'look, i dont have date money now but perhaps we can do something together that will not involve you having to pay for your own.' 

ang labo lang din nyan. my gut feel, he's really not that into you. or loser lang talaga sya.

[chicafabulosa]

Why do people need to say this is not PEX? Yes, this is GT, open to any topic. Hindi lang naman pera yun issue, about din sa personality nun guy.

TS just copied and pasted her comment for PEX forum here. so nacopy yung PEX thats why we pointed it to her. If you read it, napansin mo rin she admitted and apologized for her mistake. but we answered her issue naman and we didnt dwell with the PEX issue. i hope you did read the entire thread since maiksi pa naman sya. And btw, the TS edited her post and deleted the Pex thing. so I hope it answers your query about why we corrected her that this GT and not PEX.

to help you see the original post of the TS at PEX which she copied and pasted here you go

 

Sep 3, 2015 01:46 PM #1
TwoRista
TwoRista is offline
TwoTravel

Join Date
    Jul 2009

[3 Years] [5 Years] [Your First PEx PIN!]
Suitor Issues - Any help is welcomed

    Dear fellow pexers, I have this suitor for like 3 months now, we started dating since April this year but up until this time, I never experienced him paying the whole bill during our dinner/lunch dates. We always split the bill.

    I found it as a red flag but kept dating with him and thought to give him some time and benefit of the doubt but one evening i really found it so weird when we ate at jollibee and he had me queued in the line and just gave me Php 100 peso bill the worth of his order of Php 98.

    needless to say, i got turned off...

    any help please and comments? is this man worth my time? thanks in advance for your inputs

http://www.pinoyexchange.com/forums/showthread.php?t=767149

[mysterioza_me]

I find it insulting pag-ayaw ako gastusan ng guy. Walang karapatan ang guy makipagdate kung kahit sa first 2 dates hindi niya mailibre ang girl lalo na sa case mo TS na 3mos kayo nagde-date pero never nailibre. Tapos girl pa papilahin niya sa counter para mag-order. Never na nga nanglibre hindi pa nagpaka-gentleman man lang.

Hahaha nakakaloka marami ng mauutak na guy ngayon ang hinahanap na girl ay stable na hindi katulad dati na ang girl ang pumipili ng guy na stable na. Tapos kapag asawa mo na or bf na biglang boom wala ng work keso hindi makahanap ng ibang work tapos  may excess baggage pa may kakilala ako ganyan ang hanap na gf/wife may kaya sa buhay kapag asawa mo na kasi hanggat kaya mag tiis na walang work ang asawa mag tiis naku sis kung hindi ganyan ang pangarap mong buhay may asawa lumayo ka na asap

I experienced this with a guy I used to date before . All signs were pointing me to the direction of being a young sugar mommy (bigla na lang naging mareklamo sa work at boss etc, ako daw magbayad ng meal or cab kasi I have bigger salary compared to him--inassumed niya yan). Sinabihan ko siya na wala akong plano maging sugar mommy bata pa ako to think that he is older than me tapos ako pa susustento sa kanya. Hindi na ko nagparamdam sa kanya kahit anong text, call at pm niya. Sakit sa ulo ang mga ganitong klase ng lalake kaya dapat iwasan.

[harley18]

OK. May account din ako sa PEX pero mas masaya ako dito sa GT. hehe

Sabi nya pala, "hello fellow pexers". Hindi ko napansin yun.. e nabasa ko na yun ibang mga comment.. poor me. 
I now understand. TY.

So much for Pexers thing, last na sana to. Back to topic!!

^ I think you misunderstood the PEx reference. PEx is Pinoy Exchange, another online forum like GT. The other members pointed that out lang just to make it clear to TS and to the other readers that this is GT, not PEx.

TS just copied and pasted her comment for PEX forum here. so nacopy yung PEX thats why we pointed it to her.
 

[argento]

Ang mahalaga may work yung guy at hindi nagpapalibre.

[karla1o]

I find it insulting pag-ayaw ako gastusan ng guy.

So do I.

Walang karapatan ang guy makipagdate kung kahit sa first 2 dates hindi niya mailibre ang girl lalo na sa case mo TS na 3mos kayo nagde-date pero never nailibre. Tapos girl pa papilahin niya sa counter para mag-order. Never na nga nanglibre hindi pa nagpaka-gentleman man lang.

I totally agree

[khaleesiCersei]

What i find totally off sis eh yun fact na ikaw pa talaga hinayaan nyang pumila sa fastfood. Tsaka fastfood na ngalang eh ano ba naman yun libre ka nya ng sundae o french fries. Ayoko ng ganyan haha. Turn off for me. Pero sis matanong ko lang kung d ka nya nililibre anong effort naman meron sya ginagawa for you? Binibigyan ka man lang ba nya ng kahit little something lang na pasweet.. Kahit chocnut? O mamon, ballpen? Kahit ano basta galing sa kanya haha. Kung wala sis please tigil mo na yan. baka pag tagal ikaw pa singilin nyan sa gas o pamasahe nya paghatid or sundo syo hehe

[khaleesiCersei]

Pahabol sis, pano ba yan manligaw? Baka hangang text lang at puro goodmorning/goodnight na may kasamang pambobola hehe. Naku sis, wala ka mapapala jan. Mga ganyang tipo ng guy eh tamad mag effort at mas naka focus sa kung ano makukuha nya kesa sa kung anong mabibigay nya. Tama yun ibang sis natin dito, kasi At his age, 35? Parang ano yun? Tumanda na syang ganyan? Major turn off sis. Totoo ang kasabihan na hindi ka mapapakain ng pag-ibig lang Haha kung ngayon pa lang it bothers you na, believe me sis pag tagal magiging major problem nyo na yang issue na yan hangang sa lumaki ng lumaki at magkasira pa kayong dalawa. Get out now while you still can.

[chicafabulosa]

Sis khaleesi true, major turn off yung ganyan na guy

To YS: when you go out baka naman Kkb rin kayo ng bayad ng pamasahe?

[mindiegirl]

I know men who make it a point that they shoulder the bill on dates. During courtship stage, they say this is mandatory. Some of them even when already in the relationship na, sagot pa din nila. And these men are not the super yaman types. Simpleng mamamayan lang din. Well I guess men are different. But that's what separates the gentleman to the 'makapal' guys.

Definitely a no-no. Papilahin pa at abutan ng bayad para sa order nya? Grabe baka nagwalk out na ko.😝

[mooncake and leaves]

he's not the problem. neither are you. hindi lang talaga match ang expectations niyo from whatever stage you are in now. if he's 35 & financially unstable, that's his journey and as unideal as that is, you have to respect that. if you don't think he's good enough for you, stop wasting each other's time and just move on. kaya nga dating kasi youre seeing if you guys have a long-term potential. (i dont think he's a suitor, in a strict sense.)