Babymaker

[jonahh08]

I forgot to tell you this sis. Yun aunt ni mama, we call her nanay sema, hiniwalayan sya ng asawa nya dahil hindi sila magka anak. Matagal din daw nalugmok sa depression si nanay sema lalo nat nalaman nyang masaya na yung dati nyang asawa sa piling ng bago nitong babae at nagkaron na rin ito ng anak ( si carmina villaroel). Then one day may katulong na nagiwan kay Nanay Sema ng newborn baby wala nalang sya nagawa kundi alagaan [textspeak!] bata and that's the beginning na unti unting pagbalik ng buhay at sigla kay nanay Sema. Complete turnaround daw talaga sis. Hangang sa tumanda sya nagkaron sya ng breast cancer at naka survive  sya  dahil yun sa tulong ng adopted child nya. Financially, emotionally, physically ang suporta sa kanya. Sobrang mahal nila isat isa. Bottom line is, if ever you decide na humiwalay ng landas sa husband mo..try mong mag adopt. Dun mo ibuhos lahat ng pagmamahal na nasa puso mo, hindi naman kaylangan na kadugo ang mahalaga ikaw ang nag aruga at nagpalaki at ikaw ang tinuturing na ina. At sigurado yun sis, you will never be alone anymore

[bluish_mommy]

makikisali na rin sa mga reaksyon mga sisses dito... ang dating naman sa akin ng situation na ito, it's like your husband is harrasing you, harrasment in a way na dahil di mo sya mabigyan ng anak, eh pinipilit ka nyang tanggapin ang gusto nya kahit ayaw mo, emotional blackmail ito eh.

hmmm teka.. bakit di mo ipaalis yung mayoma mo, then start healing, mag-intay pa kayo ng panahon. then resort to other options like IVF etc, pero ikaw ah hindi surrogate mother.

wow ah! bilib din naman ako sa fighting spirit ng husband mo ah, as if pag na-chuckchak nya ng isang beses eh jackpot na agad na mabubuo.

anyhow, wag ka magsasawa sa pagdarasal, sabayan mo ng dasal sis! kayang kaya mo yan!

[patriciaheart]

His plan spells disaster, a bar girl? Really? No offense, I respect ladies who work in every industry, but a bar girl needs her body to work, a fit and beautiful pre-baby body to sell drinks, entertain men and dance etc for the establishment,puhunan nya yun eh. Not unless she wants to change her career to a baby maker, but it takes more than a womb to be a surrogate. Save the poor girl and I say leave him, its immoral to stay with a philanderer that refuses to change his ways -even the catholic church says that. Ask a priest, baka pagalitan kapa bakit mo kinukunsinte asawa mo by being there.

[AlphaFemale]

Hi babykat!

His solution for having a baby is unacceptable! Don't allow him to take advantage of your situation.

Maybe he is also confused that's why he is thinking this way. You are both feeling frustrated because you don't have a child together but you said you still both love each other. You can work things out by talking about why you two got married in the first place and why you are still holding on up until now.

Also, try asking him these questions, What if the situation is the other way around? Say you are as desperate as your husband and decided by yourself to hire someone who is working in a questionable establishment like that bar. What would he feel? Kadiri di ba?

He is selfish! What I am trying to say here is there are other solutions just like what the sisters here suggested. Bottom line is huwag kang papayag!

I will pray for you tonight. God bless you sis!

[Purple_Power]

Your story reminds me of one of the episodes ng Ipaglaban mo. Ganyan rin galit na galit yung husband na hindi siya magkababy with his wife. Alam ko hindi naman niya sinabihan yung wife niya na gagawa siya ng baby sa iba. Ang pinag gawaan niya ng baby yung minor age na helper who is mute and deaf, so may nagbunga. Although nahuli naman na nung wife na may nangyari sa kanila but then she did not react violently. May nagbunga so inako nilang mag asawa yung kid while yung helper taga alaga lang ng anak. Yung brothers ng helper nagfile ng kaso sa court doon sa lalake considering na minor pa lang yung mute and deaf although naresolve rin and in the end pinananagutan na lang ng mag asawa yung mag-ina, more so hindi na nakatira sa bahay ng amo yung mag-ina.

Just like other sissies here I am also negative with this kind of situation. Adultery is still Adultery kung matino at may tamang prinsipyo ang husband mo I don't think na iisipin niya ang ganitong bagay. And defining the term pangangaliwa he really sound walang pinag-aralan at walang modo at all on how he justifies it. Sinabi ba sa definition na extramarital affair without consent of the legal spouse? Google is his friend so better read and think about it. Kung gugustuhin mo pa nga pwede mo pa rin kasuhan eh! No one should be above the law. Hindi na religion or spiritual ang point ko rito kundi, batas pa rin pinag-uusapan rito.

Another thing here is how sure is your husband na kapag inanakan niya ang isang bar girl o kung sino pa man eh kapag may nabuo na that will be the end of the story and in the end both of you will succeed? Hindi ba niya naiisip yung possible problems nito or mga what ifs? Kala ba niya ganun kadali lang? Ito iisa isahin ko na pero dapat nainconsider niya ito.

1. Paano kung si bar girl maghabol na naman for another money?
2. Paano kung habulin siya ng babaeng gusto niyang anakan tapos panghimasukan pa niya yung buhay mag-asawa niyo? Worst case kung garapal si Babae at mahilig sa agaw asawa mentality? Alalahin mo may mga babaeng ganyan na gustong manggulo at naeexcite sa mga pang-aagaw ng asawa.
3. Paano kung ang gamitin ng babae yung anak ni husband or anak nila para mapunta sa kay hubby yung babae?
4 Paano kung palabasin ng babae ng nirape siya ni hubby? kahit na ba sabihin mo may verbal agreement sila eh! Just remember the Deniece Cornejo and Vhong Navarro case. Alam mo naman maraming pwedeng maging twist dito ang ending hassle pa rin na magkaroon pa ng court hearings.

Kung nasabi niyang willing naman pala siya bayaran ang girl bakit hindi na lang niya invest yan for the scientific method, at that point dyaan najujustify ang try and try until you succeed.

Also, try asking him these questions, What if the situation is the other way around? Say you are as desperate as your husband and decided by yourself to hire someone who is working in a questionable establishment like that bar. What would he feel? Kadiri di ba?

I definitely agree! Lugi pa nga babae rito eh! kasi magmumukha pa siyang P tapos kapag lalake parang victory no matter kung ilang katutak na babae pa.

Bottomline kahit paikut ikutin mo pa ng maraming beses yan never magiging tama ang pangangaliwa.

[greenpease05]

Sakay na rin  ako sa Kariton mga sisters.

Babykat, you hubby is a big fat bully and throwing  a tantrum  at you without thinking of so many aspects. Yeah all yada yada but not really thinking of the circumstances that might arise.

Daanin natin to sa business:

Has he presented to you a proper argument on how to do this? He was trying to convince you to agree on what he wants di ba? May plano ba siya ilatag sa harap ng abogado ang mga conditiones na mangyayari? Para lang sigurado na di lang puro yak yak ang mga promises nya?  At yung bar girl ba pumayag na? Papipirmahin nya ang contrata before they do the deed?


Is he ready to have a child with this bar girl but lose you a wife in the end?
 

[huggykaye]

sis babykat, para mas sigurado ka, consult for a legal advice na din... mahirap na eh, hindi naman sa hinuhusgahan ko yung babae sa bar, pero hindi natin alam kung ano pwede nya gawin in the future kung sakaling ituloy nyo ng husband mo yan...

[izabelle]

sis babykat, ano ng balita sa inyo ng husband mo?

[[-c-h-a-]]

Babykat hasn't been active for a while a... wonder what happened to her and her hubby na.

[babykat]

Hi sisses, sorry nawala ako sa circulation.  I took all your advice and really did some soul searching.  Anyway, I told him I won't agree and he should just pack up and leave kung ipipilit nya.  I can't leave him kasi it's my house so sya na lang umalis.  Plan ko nga is if maghihiwalay kami, I will adopt a baby of my own.

I was in a dark dark place for a while.  pero ang dami kong narealize. That I can be alone, I can live and be happy without him.

Siguro, napaisip din sya and kinausap nya ako.  Sabi nya he won't go through with it anymore kasi he realized how much it's hurting our marriage.  Narealize daw nya na he can't be without me, but he can be without a kid.  I guess nakatulong din na he saw na kaya ko palang mawala sya.

So now, we're ok.  Although i'm still not as warm to him as before.  Self-preservation ba to or just healing my wounds pa din?  Di ko alam.  I just hope everything will be ok na.

[purple.strawberry]

^Wow sis that's super good news I'm happy for you. Sana umayos na kayo and makamove on na diyan sa episode na yan.

[bonzaigirl]

^^babykhat that is good to hear. I wish you best of luck in your road to emotional recovery.  It may be better to also have your myoma checked. You will probably undergo a surgical procedure, but that would be better for you kesa mas lumaki ang myoma. Then maybe you can start healing and start thinking of your other plans.  Best of luck to you.

[babykat]

Thanks sisses.  I'm exploring alternative medicines right now, kasi I don't want to risk another myomectomy.  I hope na maging ok na kami from now on. 

[roxykarlo]

Sis babykat, I know one couple 6 years together without a baby, on the verge of separation because the girl can't have a baby. On the 7th year, a miracle happened, the girl got pregnant. To think they got all the tests and the result is that the guy has a low sperm count and the girl can't conceive because something like ang ovaries are unlikely healthy. Trust in the Lord and continue to pray sis. I remember everyday [textspeak!] girl nagsisimba and the guy is ready to file annulment na. The girl is devastated but she kept her strong faith. See, nothing is impossible with God. 👍

[SarSi_Em]

wow sis babykat, mabuti naging ok pa rin lahat, goodluck sis!! salamat naman natapos agad ang delubyo mo.
 
be strong sis, wag ka mawawalan ng hope, lahat kami dito sa thread mo mag pray na makabuo kayo. 

[izabelle]

I'm happy for you sis babykat! tama yan, kaya mo kahit mag isa ka lang! girl power. Magandang realization yun. Pero masaya ako para sayo na unti unti nyo naayos ng hubby mo yung issues.

[Vans]

I was in a dark dark place for a while.  pero ang dami kong narealize. That I can be alone, I can live and be happy without him.

Good job sis!

[j.adore]

Glad to hear that
This is not the first time na may turnaround ang husband pag nakita na kaya ng wife nila maging independent -- when she "let's go".

Of course, hindi na maibabalik yung dati and not immediately. Someday, pag ok na kayo pagusapan ito, let your husband understand na mas mabigat yung betrayal part rather than the desire to have a child.

[edaganda]

Are you both Catholic? Try to attend mass at any St. Pio Church. Miracles do happen.

[eihsy11]

sis babykat everything will be ok. pray pray pray. have faith and lets claimed that you will have a baby soon..