Problems you encounter while preparing for your wedding (Part 7)

[rizzie]

Hi mga sis share ko lang yung sakin. we started with our wedding preps for our next year wedding and since my h2b just started his work overseas my family and i shoulder some of the payments for the reservations to some suppliers.Then yung family ng h2b ko is planning to go to his place to take a vacation this dec and i was like really ngayon ka palang nagstart  jan at di pa nakakarecover sa expenses at the same time saving for our budget. Sabi ko nalang make sure na hindi magsusuffer ang budget namin because i dont want kasi na we will get married and then utang na yung iba. We want to stick to our budget and makagraduate kami ng walang problem sa suppliers. Sabi ko nga dapat naiisip nila yun na kakastart palang nya abroad and pwede naman sila mgvacation dun once settled na sya. I told him nalang na it will be the last na pagbibigyan ko sila since hindi pa naman kasi kami kasal but  after that we should save money na. Btw im also overseas bride but not the same country with him thats why im super stress  na sa pghahanap ng suppliers and everything then dagdag pa yun. Hays anghirap pala magpakasal 

[adik_gumala]

pasali po mga sis. ang biggest problem syempre yung mga side ni groom
haha...ang dami kasi nilang say sa lahat at minsan nakakalito na kasi kami naman ang nagfund ng wedding.
 2nd problem ay yun nabanggit ko na nga.un lack of funds. kontodo kayaod kami ng magiging hubby ko
makaipon lang. sana maging maganda at maayos naman.

Sis I agree. Search the thread about 150K wedding and the simplest wedding thread. It doesn't have to be grand and same as the current "normal" wedding. Allot a budget and pray for it. Sponsors will come. I was trying to beat Kitchie Nadal on my wedding dress to make tipid, practicality and competitiveness  hehe) but then one of my friends just can't stand it and sponsored a tailor-made dress. Then another one sponsored this, and nasundan pa ng ibang sponsors. Looking forward to more sponsors, with God's grace! I'm one lucky, loved and blessed B2B. I wanted my wedding to be as simple as possible because of budgetary reasons but God has better plans for me. Praise You Lord!

Also, search for the DIY thread. But if you are going for this path, make sure you have ample time and/or manpower aka friends & family to help you out. Kaya mo yan sis! and of course the most important thing to do is to trim your guest list!

[Purple_Power]

^I understand yung last sentence mo na mahirap magpakasal for different reasons. In your case kasi dahil sa suppliers and you are over seas. Ang tanong ko lang dyan is ready na ba talaga kayo for marriage?

Ako naman masasabi ko kaya mahirap magpakasal well sige aminado ako dahil sa budget pero kasi nagagawan pa ito ng paraan eh! Hirap lang ako magpakasal nandahil lang sa mga pakialamera sa paligid. Most likely when your parents are pushing you much especially sa invites na hindi ikaw ang masusunod. Kaya nga ako nagdadalawang isip pa eh if I would continue church or better yet wag na lang though it is my call.

[sparklingjewel]

^Hmm can't judge others' gowns kasi that might be what they asked her to make. And standard naman mga tela ah, silk chiffon, powerknits, etc. It depends what you asked for, a good designer should have most of it.

Hehe i dont know about her English but agree, it doesnt bother me if ever kasi wala naman kinalaman yun sa gown. If she doesnt prefer to speak it its prolly bec she is Chinese and some Chinese are more comfy with their accented Tagalog than English. Let it go

[Reynamargallo]

tamad ng wedding coordinator ko! lahat ng kibot, may bayad. ang bagal pa sumagot sa mga messages ko.  next week na kasal ko! walang extra effort to help me!

[NarsJJ]

- We're going over our budget! 😖
- 15k for a DJ? Sheez!
- Mom wanting to invite people I'm not too fond of
- Debating if I should get an emcee/host

[Maxim04]

^ naku sis!! Hassle nga yan! Ano ba need mo itanong? Program nio ok na ba?

[tiffany24]

Siguro sis Chili1113 after that argument na gets na ni sister mo na madami kayong gastos and inaasikaso so the least she can do is to ahmm keep her thoughts to herself.  ok lang yan sis.

next week na sis Reynamargallo just let us know what help you need, marami tayong mga sis na graduate na din who are willing to help us 

[twinxz]

@Reynamargallo
sheeesh! who is your coord? scary naman nyan sis! dapat mas active kayo ngayong nagco-communicate ni coord kasi malapit na.. O_O

prob ko ngayon coord ko din. di mag-meet sched namin

[Purple_Power]

Chili1113 That is hassle seriously, seems that she is paying attention much on designs rather than the event itself. If she wants maganda at magarbong gown, I strongly suggest that she should pay for it. Kung ako kapatid niya and she keeps on complaining then I would rather inform her not to go to the wedding anymore or no longer invited. Hindi ko rin siya bibigyan ng seat dahil wala na siyang lugar.

Reynamargallo Tell us kung sino yan para we can avoid those unprofessional wedding coordinator. I am so pissed off to na lahat na lang may bayad.

NarsJJ Sino nagfund ng wedding mo? Sariling gastos niyo ba? I believe you all have the right na pigilan ang mom mo sa invites. Yet prepare reservation seats or seat plan. I also hate that of what other parents is doing na invite ng invite without considering our situation and feelings too.

in debating about emcee or host ano ba preferred mo? yung meron o wala?

[cornflakegirl]

@adik_gumala salamat sis. buti may mga nachip in na friends at relatives. awa ng diyos makakaraos din. salamat sa advise at tips.

@reynamargallo naku sis. palitan mo na ang coordinator mo. dyan tayo kinakabahang mga brides kapat nantataga ang wedding supplier at after ng booking wala na pakialam iyong supplier di magreply.

[NarsJJ]

Hi purplepower! Yea sariling gastos namin. Sabi naman ng parents ko they will give something pero yoko isama un sa budget namin. Oo nga i've been sticking up for myself and she knows ultimately it's my wedding, my call

It seems like I do want an emcee, it's more of a budget issue. I was initially thinking I will make my entourage do that part pero kaka stress din kaya lol i don't really wanna put all that pressure on them because i've been there.

[cornflakegirl]

I have a photo-video team of my choice. kaso lang may in laws and sister-in-law are insisting their own bet.  How do I say it a nice way that I wanted my own, without offending or hurting their feelings?

we are funding our own wedding. 

[zaji731]

personally... i don't stop them from meddling.
I simply let their comments/suggestion fly past me if its not conforme with mine.
At the end of the day its my wedding, and my money that I'm shelling out, so its my decision.

[meixin]

I think it's better for your fiance to talk to them (not you) and explain to them na choice nyong dalawa yung photo/video team na yun. If it comes from you kasi there might be some conflict pa. 

[2016_May_Bride]

Hi sis, nafefeel kita. ang hirap humindi sa in laws mo. Ako nagalit na ang mom ni H2B kasi kinausap siya at pinagsabihan na huwag kukuha ng hindi namin kilala, diba kahit sino naman gusto ang lahat na nandoon sa kasal niyo kilala naming dalawa. Tapos ayon na nagmessage siya sakin na wala na daw sila pakialam sa kasal, icacancel na daw nila iyong mga bisita nila kahit iyong family member. nakakastress talaga. Minsan naiisip ko icancel na lang ang kasal kaso ito iyong dream wedding ko, hahayaan ko na lang ba hindi matuloy dahil sa kanila, at ang dami na namin nagastos. pero nakakasad talaga.

[Chili1113]

I have a photo-video team of my choice. kaso lang may in laws and sister-in-law are insisting their own bet.  How do I say it a nice way that I wanted my own, without offending or hurting their feelings?

we are funding our own wedding. 

Just say "Thanks for the suggestion! Ill look into it!" ...Then discuss it with fiance. Then let fiance cover your back heheeh. Then next time they ask you about the photo/video, you can say "Ay, we decided on someone else because they offered us a good package, and (name your fiance) also wanted to get them."

=) The trick to in-laws is to always make it look like you're getting it cheaper elsewhere, or that it was your fiance/their own kid who made the decision. It works like a charm! But your fiance has to support you on that.

2016_May_Bride: I am so so sorry to hear what youre going through! Talk to your fiance. He needs to support you on this. It is up to him to appease and pacify his parents. That's so so so sad and painful to hear your future in-laws say that to you- na wala na sila pakialam! Your fiance needs to help sort this out before the conflict becomes bigger. BUT... at the same time don't let your in-laws bully you. Dont ever feel like you need to cancel your wedding just because your MIL made drama that she will cancel all her guests!

[2016_May_Bride]

hi sis Chili1113, natuwa ako noong sinabi niya na icacancel niya ang mga bisita na ininvite niya sa kasal kasi hindi naman namin kilala kahit si H2B hindi niya kilala. pero knowing my H2B, sobrang bait kasi kaya for sure siya na naman ang susuyo doon at papayag na naman kame. pero naisip ko nga ipagawa na iyong invitation para hindi na namin malagay iyong ninang na gusto niya, isipin mo parang lahat ng ninang namin at ninong hindi namin kilala. eh iyong parents ko hinahayaan kami. nakakaloka talaga, kung ako lang okay lang sakin na wala siyang imbitahan no, kaso si hubby kawawa naman. hay. ang daming problema kung kelan malapit na ang wedding. Thank you sis.

[Purple_Power]

Hi sis, nafefeel kita. ang hirap humindi sa in laws mo. Ako nagalit na ang mom ni H2B kasi kinausap siya at pinagsabihan na huwag kukuha ng hindi namin kilala, diba kahit sino naman gusto ang lahat na nandoon sa kasal niyo kilala naming dalawa. Tapos ayon na nagmessage siya sakin na wala na daw sila pakialam sa kasal, icacancel na daw nila iyong mga bisita nila kahit iyong family member. nakakastress talaga. Minsan naiisip ko icancel na lang ang kasal kaso ito iyong dream wedding ko, hahayaan ko na lang ba hindi matuloy dahil sa kanila, at ang dami na namin nagastos. pero nakakasad talaga.

Tanong ko lang kailan nga ba ang wedding niyo?

Sorry for being notorious with this pero huwag mong icancel ang kasal mo nandahil lang sa ayaw tuparin ng future MIL mo kung ano ang gusto niyo on the wedding. Seems that napakalaking deal sa kanila ng kasal at ang mentality nila ay fiesta style na kahit kaibigan nila na hindi niyo naman kilala ay imbitahin. If that mother said wala na siyang pakialam then I can say THAT IS GOOD! if they want to cancel it then let them do it. Meaning to say dahil text naman yan at ang payo ko ay huwag na huwag niyong buburahin then that is the proof na you all have the right to invite the people you want to be the witnessed on your special day. Sinabi na nila na wala na silang pakialam diba? Then wala na silang karapatan na magbago ang isip nila. Stick to the idea with the number of guests, reservation seats and seat plan. Hindi na pwede yung kapag okay na yung Nanay she will suggest everything she wants. Minsan nga gusto kong sabihin na siya na lang magpakasal para lahat ng gusto niya matupad. It is your dream wedding so stick with your own ideas especially when it comes to invites. Minsan may ibang parents talaga na mahirap nang paliwanagan kahit ano pang lambing mo kasi ang gusto nila insists nila yung gusto lang nila na wedding ng kanilang anak. Kung tutuusin naman hindi rin naman matitiis ng ibang members of the family na hindi magpunta eh! Now kung sinabi nila na mismong sila ng parents won't go EH DI WAG! you have the proof to tell your priest na ayaw nila dahil hindi natupad ang gusto nila.

I am totally frustrated of the parents na instead na maging supportive na lang sila sa wedding mismo at yung sa sacrament of marriage mas inuna pa nila yung preparation at yung mga taong dadalo na hindi naman yung wedding niyo or marriage niyo ang concern nila kundi reception lang.

[moizzzelle]

UPDATE: G2B cancelled their wedding. Haven't talked to my friend yet, pero his other guy friend confirmed that he broke up with the B2B. Kahit paano, hoping pa rin ako na maayos yung mga gusot nila. Kaso mukhang the other party doesn't really want to compromise / cooperate.