Got questions regarding men? Post it here! (Thread 7)

[dismembered]

Bakit ang dami ng non commited guy nag exist ngayon? they have options. if the other one hindi mag work out doon sila sa iba.I have option too. but why guys are different now a days compared dati. Paki explain 😊

You've already said the answer... Hindi sila nag commit kasi they have options. Kung walang options yan or "no choice" baka kahit hindi naman gusto mag commit eh mapipilitan mag commit.

You can't blame guys na magbabago since ang girls din naman nowadays ay nagbabago. Kumbaga, nag adapt lang ang bawat isa sa changes. Sa panahon ngayon andali makakilala ng kung sino sino. Pinaliit na ang mundo ng internet at madali na makakilala at magkalapit ang mga tao. So yun nga.. madaming options. Bottomline is, kung gusto ka talaga ng tao... willing sya makipag commit at mag take risks sayo. If not, options ka lang din nya.

[slickchick]

hi mga sis and bros. i have a question especially for the guys, but of course very much welcome yung insights ng mga sis. for the guys, do you (even out of courtesy) inform your gf/wives if you're going on an inuman spree with your friends? kahit hindi yung tipong humihingi ka ng permission ah (parang OA naman pag kailangan ng permission), pero even out of courtesy sa gf/wife and sa relationship nyo? and do you think clingy ba ang dating if a girl requests his guy na magsabi man lang (note ah.. magsabi hindi magpaalam para sa permission) kung pupunta sya sa inuman? thanks in advance!

Thanks mga sis and bros sa mga insights nyo on this. I really appreciate it. 

And while on the topic of commitment and marriage (from the most recent posts), mga sis and bros, is it possible for a guy/girl to be ready for commitment (i.e. to stick to 1 person) but not believe in the idea of marriage? I was discussing this with a male cousin and sabi nya he is ready to settle down (i.e. commit and stick to one person - daw), but he does not believe in marriage. In your opinion, is this (idea) possible? TIA! 

[j.adore]

It is kasi there are some people who do not conform to the beliefs of the society.

BUT, if they are going to build their lives together as in properties, business, family, etc. marriage is required to retain legal ownership.
No choice but to conform unless ok lang sa kanila mawala yun in the event of death or separation.

[simang]

^^yes, i believe it's possible. i remember a guy friend who's very romantic but doesn't want to get married. for him kasi, loving someone should be the sole reason for being with the person, not the legalities, not the contract. and sa kanya talaga marriage is just like any other contract. kaya he'd rather be with someone out of love, not because he's bounded by paper. pero guess what, he still got married. he got married because that's what his wife wanted. his wife wanted a wedding and because he loves her that much, he gave her a wedding to make his wife happy.

[jtansanco]

Thanks mga sis and bros sa mga insights nyo on this. I really appreciate it. 

And while on the topic of commitment and marriage (from the most recent posts), mga sis and bros, is it possible for a guy/girl to be ready for commitment (i.e. to stick to 1 person) but not believe in the idea of marriage? I was discussing this with a male cousin and sabi nya he is ready to settle down (i.e. commit and stick to one person - daw), but he does not believe in marriage. In your opinion, is this (idea) possible? TIA! 

Yes, that's very much possible. In Sweden, getting married is not the norm. But then again, if things don't work out well, divorce will be an easy way out. In the Philippines, people were raised conservatively and as a Christian/Catholic so the Sacrament of Matrimony is important. In general, it's just a formality. Getting married is expensive too...

[dismembered]

is it possible for a guy/girl to be ready for commitment (i.e. to stick to 1 person) but not believe in the idea of marriage?

It's possible. Pero for added protection and practical purposes, mabuti na rin na may marriage na maganap. Not necessarily gagastos ka ng super mahal or what dahil option naman ang civil wedding at hindi rin required na maging magarbo.. I think this is the ultimate proof of love.Willing ka maging bound by law na maging kaisa ng minamahal mo. Practical sya kasi pag kasal ka, conjugal properties at pwedeng declare mo as dependent yung partner mo etc. Protection sya kasi nga bound by law at nag testify ka na mahal mo ang tao sa harap ng tao at sa harap ng batas. Feelings change, maaring mahal mo ngayon pero bukas hindi. Pero yung nasa "contract" hindi mababago unless ipabago nyo parehas. Pag ikaw ang andun, ikaw ang legal partner. May basis ka lagi.

Does marriage always work? No. Pero not enough reason para hindi mo gawin. Based sa mga kakilala ko, usually may bad history ng marriage ang family kaya ayaw na din pasukin ito. Meron din naman, ayaw lang talagang pa-commit kasi hindi sure kaya ayaw din pasukin.

[Girltalker2]

BUT, if they are going to build their lives together as in properties, business, family, etc. marriage is required to retain legal ownership.
No choice but to conform unless ok lang sa kanila mawala yun in the event of death or separation.

In other countries especially Europe, they respect cohabitation at they recognise partners kahit Hindi kasal

[simang]

Pero for added protection and practical purposes, mabuti na rin na may marriage na maganap.... I think this is the ultimate proof of love.Willing ka maging bound by law na maging kaisa ng minamahal mo. Protection sya kasi nga bound by law at nag testify ka na mahal mo ang tao sa harap ng tao at sa harap ng batas. Feelings change, maaring mahal mo ngayon pero bukas hindi. Pero yung nasa "contract" hindi mababago unless ipabago nyo parehas. Pag ikaw ang andun, ikaw ang legal partner. May basis ka lagi.

Yung point naman ng guy friend ko who initially doesn't want to get married was, marriage is NOT the ultimate proof of love. The ultimate proof of love is that he'll stick with the person because he wants to and not because he's bounded by law, because exactly, feelings change, and it's an everyday choice to be with the person kahit wala ka naman talagang pinanghahawakan. For him, that IS love.

^I believe cohabitation is also honored here, parang may certain number of years of living together yata na magiging conjugal na yung properties nyo.

[dismembered]

Yung point naman ng guy friend ko who initially doesn't want to get married was, marriage is NOT the ultimate proof of love. The ultimate proof of love is that he'll stick with the person because he wants to and not because he's bounded by law, because exactly, feelings change, and it's an everyday choice to be with the person kahit wala ka naman talagang pinanghahawakan. For him, that IS love.

But your guy friend still got married. I salute him! For protection lang yung sa law part. Syempre ang essence naman ng marriage talaga is love. Walang kwenta if wala nun. Pero if all else fails, or kung saka sakaling nasa edge ka na na bibitiw ka, meron kang protection na ikaw ay married. Marriage is a proof of love kasi hindi mo alam mangyayari sa future, pero willing kang mag stay til death do us part. I see nothing wrong na if mahal mo ang tao, pakasalan mo dapat... parang health insurance... if you care for someone, aside from all the care he is getting from you, mas ok pa rin na may health insurance if something happened.

[pretty_B]

hi guys and gals!

how do you guys want to spend your birthday with your new girl? 

my bf of 3months is having his bday next week. i want to surprise him and make him really happy on his bday kasi masalimuot ang bday nya last year. gusto ko sana sya isurprise but not that en grande since bago palang naman kami.  any suggestion?

[three8one]

^ mag prepare ka ng konting salo salo, invite your common friends, bigay mo sa kanya yung gift mo. gawin mo to ng wala siyang kaalam alam para masurpresa siya.

[silver_crescent]

Question: In a guy's point of view, pano nyo malalaman if the girl is The One? Like yung sya na yung gusto nyong pakasalan? 

TIA!

[badw33d]

^if we feel that the girl is feeling the same (we are the one). there's no blueprint to it, its just a feeling. then comes the subject/topics about future. usually, from feelings it becomes technical, in a sense where both the guy and the girl will talk about their future (wants and needs), and usually it will grow. if it doesnt grow then, one has to compromise, and if one doesnt, then you know whats gonna be next. :-)

[silver_crescent]

So it all boils down with The Feeling.  thanks bro badw33d!

[jtansanco]

Question: In a guy's point of view, pano nyo malalaman if the girl is The One? Like yung sya na yung gusto nyong pakasalan? 

TIA!

Hmmmm... I'll know if I can see through her imperfections and still accept her... If I see her as a companion for life more than anything else... If we can make each smile and laugh through the good and bad times... If we can sort out any problems that we have together because we decided to to be committed... If she is willing to fly and live with me here in the US... Or.... If I have decided to say goodbye to my American Dream and go back to the PH and start over with her... Compromise and sacrifice for love. 

[pretty_B]

^ mag prepare ka ng konting salo salo, invite your common friends, bigay mo sa kanya yung gift mo. gawin mo to ng wala siyang kaalam alam para masurpresa siya.

hi! meron na kasing konting salo salo na inorganize nya. bwahaha. actually, invited ako to meet his friends. though nameet ko na yung iba dun. then naisip ko nalang is lutuan sya ng food since lately napapadalas ang pagrequest nya na dalhan ko sya ng food.  kaso, gaganapin kasi yung salo salo sa place nya. mejo nahiya naman ako dalhin yung luto ko sakanya on his bday. baka ibigay ko nalang ahead or a day after? waaa. -.-

[silver_crescent]

Hmmmm... I'll know if I can see through her imperfections and still accept her... If I see her as a companion for life more than anything else... If we can make each smile and laugh through the good and bad times... If we can sort out any problems that we have together because we decided to to be committed... If she is willing to fly and live with me here in the US... Or.... If I have decided to say goodbye to my American Dream and go back to the PH and start over with her... Compromise and sacrifice for love. 

Awww...may hehe! Wishing you all the best! Thanks for the feedback bro jtansanco! 

[three8one]

hi! meron na kasing konting salo salo na inorganize nya. bwahaha. actually, invited ako to meet his friends. though nameet ko na yung iba dun. then naisip ko nalang is lutuan sya ng food since lately napapadalas ang pagrequest nya na dalhan ko sya ng food.  kaso, gaganapin kasi yung salo salo sa place nya. mejo nahiya naman ako dalhin yung luto ko sakanya on his bday. baka ibigay ko nalang ahead or a day after? waaa. -.-

hindi nakakahiya yun ah, prepare mo yung food mo na ibibigay mo sa kanya then kung susunduin ka o ikaw mismo pupunta sa kanila dalhin mo yun...sa mga lalake ang sarap kaya ng feeling na pinagluluto sila ng gf/partner/wife nila. sobrang saya rin ng feeling mo pag naapreciate yun ng bf mo tapos shinare nya pa yun sa mga friends nya. palagay ko mararamdaman mo na sobrang proud siya sayo.

push mo yan sis... nakakaexicite tuloy... ahaha.

[jazzlawyer]

do you block your exes on your phones, viber messages social media etc? why would you do that if youre over with her right?

[jtansanco]

^ If I'm the one who broke up with her, I won't block her. If she broke up with me, I'll delete every traces of her.