Got questions regarding men? Post it here! (Thread 7)

[Girltalker2]

Sis oshiawase - obvious siguro feel na feel nya patay na patay ka sa kanya?

You don't have to be totally di mo sya pansinin. You just have to be 'civil' with him. gawin mo na kasi iyan Ex crush mo. Go out, mingle with others.

Kahit sinabi ba nya na yun, crush mo parin ba sya?

[oshiawase]

well, kung ako kasi nasa sitwasyon mo sis at ganyan kahangin yang lalaking yan. may tendency kasi ako na pumatol sa kayabangan nya. haha. sa tono ng pananalita ng crush mong yan, ang yabang at kapal ng mukha. dapat tinuturuan ng leksyon yan. be tough. pafall-in mo. paasahin. hehe. ganun. peace yow.  along the process naman, makikita mo kung worth it ba sya. if not...edi atleast, nakabawi ka lang, nagenjoy ka pa. hehe. sorry, natuturnoff kasi ako sa ganyang lalaki. ang lalim ng word na "importansya"  and the fact na sinabihan ako na wala o nabawasan na importansya ko sa taong gusto ko, waley na. FO na yan. hehe. after all, mukha namang flirt si guy. bwahaha. peace again. 

Paano ko siya mapapa-fall kung iignore ko siya in the meantime? Balak ko talaga mag distance muna tapos dapat sa next na in person kami nagkita, dapat blooming ako

[oshiawase]

That's the point! Pakita mong affected ka at dahil dun ayaw mo na sa kanya. Tipong wala ka na ring gana sa kanya. Tignan natin ang kahihinatnan.

Huh? Hindi ba mas lumalaki ego ng guys pag alam nilang affected si girl??

[oshiawase]

Sis oshiawase - obvious siguro feel na feel nya patay na patay ka sa kanya?

You don't have to be totally di mo sya pansinin. You just have to be 'civil' with him. gawin mo na kasi iyan Ex crush mo. Go out, mingle with others.

Kahit sinabi ba nya na yun, crush mo parin ba sya?

Ay ganun ba 'yon?? Ayoko lumaki ego niya. ayoko isipin niya na patay na patay ako sa kaniya. Anong gagawin ko??

[Girltalker2]

^ Just be civil. Treat him just like any guy you know. 

If I were you, move on nako. Kaka turn off kaya. Hanap ako ng ibang crush/date.

[red_yesha]

sis oshiawase..
Ego ba kamo?. haler e ngayon palang e super ego na nya! kaya nga lakas nyang sabihin na nababawasan ka na ng importansya sa kanya.
tulad nga ng sinabe nila maki mingle ka na rin sis sa ibang boys para mabawasan rin sya ng importansya sa buhay mo hehe.
para magawa mo yun ,dumistansya ka na sakanya.

[pretty_B]

Paano ko siya mapapa-fall kung iignore ko siya in the meantime? Balak ko talaga mag distance muna tapos dapat sa next na in person kami nagkita, dapat blooming ako

pwede rin ito sis. para pag nakita ka nya na super blooming, matino naman sya. haha. pero mas bet ko yung sinabi ni sis Girltalker2.

^ Just be civil. Treat him just like any guy you know. 

If I were you, move on nako. Kaka turn off kaya. Hanap ako ng ibang crush/date.

tama ito. for me talaga, turn off na yung ginawa nya, move on na yan pag ganyan. hihi.

[dismembered]

Huh? Hindi ba mas lumalaki ego ng guys pag alam nilang affected si girl??

You have to know how to play the game.

[pretty_B]

You have to know how to play the game.

EXACTLY.

[oshiawase]

@Dismembered @Pretty_B, but HOW do you play the GAME??

Now, I no longer reply to him that often but in person, I am still "nice" to him because deep inside, I kinda "miss" him. I know I sound pathetic but a part of me is still offended about what he said. Plus the fact that he is not really sending a categorical signal as to which direction he wants us to go, if there is any.

HELP?

[Girltalker2]

^ sis, can't you see? Ilan advice na namin sayo but it seems you don't want to help yourself. The more you tell yourself you miss him, you will get stuck there as one of his flings lang.

You have to mingle with other guys para ma divert ang attention mo. The less of him you see/think, mas hindi mo sya ma m-miss.

The solution here is never na maging kayo otherwise Kawawa ka lang dyan.

[pretty_B]

hi sis oshiawase, "playing the game" will not work on you, i guess. tama si sis Girltalker2 

[mindiegirl]

I agree with you pretty_B, since to be able to play the game, you should have no feelings for the person. Sis oshiawase how can you play with his emotions if you still like him? Mas ikaw yung masasaktan.

[dismembered]

To be able to play the game... one should be able to control her emotion... kinda using mind over emotion. 

[oshiawase]

So far, puro girls ang nag aadvise sa akin. Guys, what do you think?

Should I totally ignore him? But if I do, what about our friendship? Of course I don't want to just set aside our friendship. But at the same time, I want to know his TRUE intentions.

[Girltalker2]

^ Ilan months na ba ganyan? What you see is what you get. Simpleminded lang naman ang guys, kung Hindi ka nya i-ask to be his GF, then Hindi nya intention maging GF ka. If you see him flirting with other girls, Mas lalong ayaw nya patali kahit kanino (kasama ka na doon).

Tsaka kung wala syang pinarating na intention, eh di Wala. So why do you want to know? Napakayabang din nyang nilalang na iyan, so if ever alam mo na now na nagpapa fall lang iyan for fun, ano magagawa mo? Wala din naman di ba?

Best is Move on. Ha habol din iyan if he truly feels something for you. If not, at least di nasayang oras mo kaka isip or kakaantay. Tandaan mo, they will eventually catch up or chase you if they are TRULY and SINCERELY interested.

[pretty_B]

I agree with you pretty_B, since to be able to play the game, you should have no feelings for the person. Sis oshiawase how can you play with his emotions if you still like him? Mas ikaw yung masasaktan.

To be able to play the game... one should be able to control her emotion... kinda using mind over emotion. 

correct! correct! i tried this once, and i succeeded. di ako nafall kay guy. and it is really, less stress. enjoy enjoy lang. basta learn to choose your war.

question: can we really separate love and lust?

[simang]

oshiawase, his TRUE intentions are very clear naman. He's not into you, period, because if he is, he'll make you his girlfriend and in no way will make you feel (or tell you in your face) that you are not very significant for him. Ang sinasabi lang ng most of our sisses here, is that if this crush feeling is no longer fun, and is stressing you out, and making you paranoid, or worse, making you feel unworthy of him, then it's time to move on and find a healthier relationship.

pretty_B, for me, if you love someone, the lust must come with it. But if you're lusting over someone, hindi necessary na mahal mo sya. Para kasi sa akin, the physical expression of love is very important kasi in essence (anatomy-wise) yun naman talaga ang main purpose of being in a relationship (to procreate).

[pretty_B]

thanks sis simang. i agree that if you love someone, the lust must come with it. but is it normal that i cant do "it" with my bf? i have this mindset na: it is either love or lust, not both. sabi ko, if i did it with him, baka hindi ko sya kayang mahalin ng mas buo. ang gulo ba? -.-

[simang]

^yung issue mo, is it about having sex with him, or is it about not fully, wholeheartedly loving him yet? for me lang ha, once you are in a relationship na sigurado ka 100%, without doubts, it's easy to be physically affectionate. and hindi mo maiisip na doing that is just lust. maybe hindi ka pa ganun ka comfortable with your relationship with him. maybe you're still trying to justify na you're in a relationship not just for the sex. valid naman yan. as long as you two are in the same page, then that should be no problem. my thoughts overall is to just enjoy the relationship, don't overthink if you should have sex with him or not, don't do it if you don't feel ready, and don't feel guilty if you do it. it sucks out the fun pag masyado ka nag isip at nagdefine ng mga bagay bagay. enjoy mo lang, get to know your partner better everyday, be initimate when you want to.