Your 1st home after the wedding

[Chili1113]

Hello!! Just wondering where the soon-to-be-newlyweds here plan to stay after the wedding. Have you encountered any issues in making this decision with your fiance?

In my case,  H2B really didn't want any help at all from our families with the wedding or a place to stay. Thankfully this has recently been sorted out recently.

H2B also shuttles back and forth between Manila and Negros so technically we will have two homes. His mom who is a widow has recently moved into his house in Negros. It doesn't bother me and I don't think his mom and I will t have any conflicts. Anyway I only plan to go there once a month.

All my family and friends who have gotten married have been assisted or "helped" in settling down into a new home. But H2B didn't want to accept that because we are older already in our 30s.

Has anyone here had issues and arguments with H2B over what the living situation will be after the wedding? What will your living arrangement be?

[juwie]

Me! before, ang plan ng fiance ko was to have a sort of a compound with a common garden tapos in the compound andun siblings nya. And share-share sa mga ibang gastos sa "compound" or whatever. This idea did not sit in well with me so that idea of his is now gone. 😀

[hallerski]

we'll be back in SG after the wedding.
we'll decide na lang later on, if we'll buy a flat in sg, or buy a lot then house din in phils. but definitely, all the expenses would be shouldered by us. 

[120515]

we'll be staying in sg after the wedding but we'll also be planning our move to where we really want to settle so we can start saving up for our own house and we will shoulder all expenses as well

[Chili1113]

^Same here sis! H2B and I are giving ourselves 6-8 years to make a move and purchase a house we would want to retire in =) In the meantime we will stay in a small townhouse that we will renovate. To be honest, for a while I was getting cold feet about getting married and moving out of my current home. Moving out and staying in a small townhouse without my family will be such a big adjustment for me even if I have done this already before. Hay!

[j.adore]

We bought a condo and had it set up for us to stay in after the wedding. Ugh the stress of having to do 2 preps at the same time!

We both also moved in from a big house to a small space. Being with each other in a place that's ours trumps the space issues everyone else was worried about.
I think we were just too excited to start our lives together that's why the only adjustment we had was on the travel to work. As in weird we felt very at home agad.

I guess just think it's temporary and you'll get naman a bigger home in the future? Might seem long for now but before you know it, you'll have fulfilled your goals

[caleeice]

Sis Chili, I feel you! My cousins have been wishing me luck on my adjustment period. Hehe. Grounds are spacious naman in their family compound, but our home-to-be is just a small 1-bedroom with t&b. But the part I'm getting really sentimental about is that I cannot bring my pets with me because walang mag-aalaga doon. Just thinking about it... na I don't get to hug my dog every morning when I wake up, na wala nang sasalubong sa akin when I get home, etc., naiiyak na talaga ako.  But I guess I'm still lucky since our home-to-be is only 30 mins away from our house. So I can still visit my fur babies and get some clothes every week (haha kaunti lang kasya in our home-to-be). Pero major adjustment talaga!

[Chili1113]

thanks j.adore and caleeice for sharing your thoughts!! Actually I feel very happy and grateful for the blessing of having a rent-free small home in a nice neighborhood =) I am grateful for many things really. I know I should just get over it and stop being a big baby about it!! I am really hoping that when our whole renovating and furnishing process will get me excited and prepare me emotionally to move in.

But I think the biggest adjustment we will have to make is not so much moving to a smaller space, but to move into a home without our family members. I come from a very close family of insomniacs and our house is always so alive 24/7. We have daily midnight snacks together with my siblings and sometimes parents! We are all super close to each other and we stay up late just chatting away. I will really miss the company and will need to adjust to a very quiet house!

[reese17]

^ Chili1113, I can relate with how you're feeling! I'm also close to my family - as in we have really lively discussions over dinner, we watch movies and TV series (GoT and Downton Abbey! Lol) and we also like to snack together too. I'm excited to spend my life with my husband to be but reading your post also made me realize na shucks, I'm going to miss my family na rin. Waaaah. (Time to practice elegant crying. Hahaha.)

[barbillie]

^After the wedding, we went back to my parents' house to get my things (we lived for a moment in hubby's house with his parents). Nung palabas na ko pinto, hug lang ako kay mommy and sabi ko malapit lang naman ako. Tapos labas na ko ng gate at sumakay na sa car. Nung nasa passenger seat na ko, lingon ako sa front door andun mommy ko. Dun ko na naramdaman [textspeak!] rush ng emotions. Napaiyak na ko. Labas ulit ako ng car at pasok ng gate. Balik ako kay mommy, hug sabay hagulgol.

Tagal ko din nakayakap sa kanya nun. Kasi although nagcocondo na ko before and sanay ako na independent, parang iba yung feeling nung araw na yun na, eto na, married na ko.

Hanggang ngayon naluluha ako pag naalala ko yung moment na yun.

[juwie]

Aww, Barbilie! Naluha ako sa kwento mo 😢

[belle_v2g]

SIS barbillie.. I imagined your kwento and medyo teleserye-like scenario sya.. kakaiyak.. I've been away from my family since college,  and away from my husband and son for several months when I first went overseas so medyo sanay akong malayo sa loved ones. Iniisip ko nga din if iiyak pa ba parents ko sa wedding, maybe not anymore haha! Sa airport nga di nila ako iniiyakan eh lol!
Back to the topic, after the wedding, we'll stay 2 more weeks in the Philippines then back here to work and next target is to buy our own house since we are currently renting our own unit pa.

[reese17]

Grabe barbillie! Super touching naman niyan. Sniff.

There's a portion in our wedding ceremony where we get to honor our parents with short speeches and I think I might cry first few lines palang. Eeek.

As for where we're staying, we bought a 2-BR condominium at Acacia Estates but planning to stay at my in-law's condo unit the first few months so that our cash flow can 'breathe' and we don't need to stress about moving in and setting up the place.

[imprincessfiona]

Waaaa sis  barbillie super touching naman ng kwento mo. After our wedding, derecho kami sa house namin to pack my things kasi after two days go kami ng boracay for our honeymoon. At this moment, I still live with my mom and two niece while my husband lives with his mom and siblings as well. Parang magjowa lang ang peg namin. Parang ping pong dalaw dito dalaw doon. Before this year ends, we'll get a rent to own house somewhere in the south (dun ako malapit work tee hee!). Kaya til now hindi ko pa din maramdaman na MRS na ako kasi nga we dont have a place na amin talaga.

[fionaapple]

^we got married last Dec 20. after the wedding, we stayed for a night at the Intercon. the following day, Dec 21, we went to Coron for our honeymoon. on Christmas eve, we went home to my in laws' house and stayed in my husband's room. the following day, we went to batangas for Christmas celebration. on the 27th, we went to our house to get my clothes and things. i did not want my mom to see me cry because i know that it will make her cry too and it will be harder for her, so i waited until my husband and I were already in the car. i sobbed during the trip from my house to my husband's family's house.

we decided to stay at my in laws' house because we do not want to rent a place. although we give a little amount to his mother to contribute to the household expenses especially because we do not cook our own food.

a month later, we started looking for our own place. we found it inside the village adjacent to the one where me and my mom used to live, and where my mom lives up to now. our first nest will be a small 2 storey townhouse unit which is still being constructed. the turn over of the unit will be on January 2016, a few months after i have given birth to our first baby. once we have moved to our own house, my mom will stay with us because she is about to turn 60 na rin and i do not want her to live alone. also, i am an only child. that is why i want my mom to be stay with us instead.

by the way, we might be having twins based on the initial scan...hopefully everything turns out as planned.

i had to edit again because I remembered that on our first night together at the Intercon, i couldn't stop crying also. i was telling my husband that i am so sad because my mother is not with me. and I won't be staying with her anymore....and my husband comforted me and told me to be patient with him because we will be looking for a place and we will be taking my mom with us. i was comforted by those words. and i thanked my husband for understanding my situation because i am an only child and my mom is like my bestfriend and my everything.

[Chili1113]

^Congratulations sis on finding your 1st home and on the news of expecting twins!! That is so exciting. Also it is nice that your mom will get to stay with you too. What a very happy and lively home you will have with your twins and mom around!!

Here is some funny trivia about where I will be living. I am moving back to My 1st HOME EVER!!!  I will be moving to the 1st Home of my own parents right after they got married where we all stayed for 5 years until their 2nd child was born (I\m the eldest) LOL It is currently being rented out but we will renovate it.

[imprincessfiona]

Wow congrats sis fionaapple. I will pray for your safe delivery in the future. It's not easy to have twin kids 'cause I have a twin sister so I know how hard it is to raise two kids at the same time but having one is amazing.

[fionaapple]

thank you Chili1113 and imprincessfiona!

nakakatuwa naman yung trivia about your first home together, Chili1113! at least even if your parents are not with you, you will feel at home na rin siguro kasi that is the house you grew up in.

imprincessfiona, di ba nakakapagod yun...gusto rin sana namin nung una yun, pero parang nakakapagod. by the way, every saturday night, we have dinner with my mom either at her house, because she loves to cook (and she is very good at it!), or somewhere else. Although usually casual dinners lang naman because my mom lives near Lilac St., in Marikina...maraming hole in the wall and new food establishments na nakakatuwa itry at idiscover.

[fionaapple]

^Sarap mo sis, you will have a brand new house!!  Congrats!

thank you! my mom offered our old house to us also. but i declined kasi she is renting it out and mabait naman yun mga tenants, mahirap naman for them to look for a place plus hindi naman sila sakit ng ulo. also yung rental income sayang kasi my mom earns from it. another thing is, it does not have parking space. so mahirap naman kung iwan lang sa labas ang sasakyan.

anyway, at 29 years old, my husband and I are proud to be on our way to having a nest that we bought on our own through our hard-earned money.

anyway, i am sure your first home will look good pa rin because i have observed from your posts that you are quite a stylish woman.

[120515]

congratulations on your twins, fionaapple! ^_^