Do You Hide Money from your Husband?

[Annie M.]

I am wondering mga sis kung meron kayong separate savings, checking, or credit card accounts that your hubby does NOT know about?

Do you think this is necessary? Is it wise and "healthy" to keep a secret account? Or do you think that as husband and wife, all financial matters should be completely transparent and shared?

[fionaapple]

^sabi sa pre-marriage seminar, "nararapat sa mag-asawa, wag magkanya-kanya". ganito ginagawa namin. 2 months pa lang namin kami married ng husband ko. may separate kaming accounts ng husband ko pero di naman kami nagtataguan ng money.

[Annie M.]

Oo nga sis eh. Narinig ko rin yan sa marriage seminar. My hubby and I are completely transparent right now.

Pero sabi naman ng mom ko, dapat daw maging 'wais' ako at wag ko daw i-declare mga bonus ko sa asawa ko. Itabi ko daw yun so I have my own secret stash.

* torn *

[fionaapple]

A oo...medyo ganyan din ginagawa ko.

[m_lim]

^i agree with your mom.

kasi wala naman tayo sa fairy tale world. realistically, tumingin ka sa paligid mo,  ilan lang bang marriages ang tumatagal ng "forever"??

sabi nga nila, sh1t happens even to good people!

kahit ayaw natin ng broken family, hindi natin masasabi ano pwedeng mangyari. at pag nangyari yon, paano ka? paano ang mga anak mo?

ilan nanay na ba ang iniwan ang anak sa mga tatay kasi hindi nila kayang buhayin? or mas gaganda kasi ang kinabukasan sa tatay?

hindi ko sinasabing magpaka Nega tayo. sinasabi ko lang, magising at buksan mga mata sa katotohanan ng mundo.

the choice is yours....

[caterpillar-girl]

I have my own personal savings account, but it's not secret as my husband knows about it. Ok lang naman sa kanya. I think wives should have their own money, apart from the joint accounts with the husband. It doesn't have to be secret, but at least have money that only you can touch. My husband doesn't even know how much money we really have, hehe. For him, as long as the bills are paid, and we are able to maintain our lifestyle in general, hindi na sya nakikialam sa finances. Technically, I can rob him blind, lol. 

[enchoi]

Dati hindi money ang itinago ko sa husband ko... utang!
And it was our biggest fight nung nagka-alaman...
After nun, he really helped me to pay it all off

Now, everything about money is very transparent to both of us.
We maintain separate accounts and a joint account.
Meron syang money from his other business and rakets.  I can access those accounts naman online although di ko naman yun ginagawa unless may request sya na pabayaran or pa-transfer.

Meron din akong sariling diskarte with our pooled money and savings.  Sinasabi ko lang kung ano ang gagawin ko like I will save it thru MF or stocks, etc.

I think importante lang pag-usapan nyo yung mga goals nyo.
Lalo na yung mga problema financially. 

Ayoko personally ng pinagtataguan ako ng pera.  So hindi ko rin yun ginagawa sa kanya.

[sachism]

almost same tayo caterpillar-girl. My husband doesn't know how much money we have for as long as the bills are paid and he can make his purchases. He doesn't even know where I am keeping them. So I maintain a list of the banks/investments para in case na there's an emergency involving me (wag naman sana) he would know where they are kept. Recently I have changed 70% of our accounts to OR accounts. Dati kasi sakin lang lahat nakapangalan. And all those time na sakin lang nakapangalan, he didn't mind.

I dont know kung meron pa sya sariling accounts din aside from declared income nya sa akin. I let him be. Again for as long as the bills are paid.

I agree that wives should have their own savings lalo na if your husband is very particular about money. knows the ins and outs. Sa panahon ngayon, we should always protect ourselves and our kids. And we can use it too to give surprise gifts to them.

[quinone]

i know some who do this, kasi naman yung mga husband nila basta alam na may pera ginagastos, complacent sa pagsupport ng family, or tinitipid si wife.

ako naman walang 'secret' stash pero i have my own under our name (pero it is mine) at kahit kelan hindi niya ni-request na gamitin namin yun unless talagang emergency. lahat ng expenses namin 100% si husband at naintindihan niya na i feel secure na may sarili akong pera. chaka kahit nung bf/gf kami hindi niya ako tinatanung about my money. ako yung ma-kwenta sa aming dalawa, so i guess siya dapat ang may secret stash. 

[Lianne@TheWiseLiving]

My friend's mother does this.

Her OFW father is super generous to the point na tuwing umuuwi sila sa probinsya, for example 20k dala ng dad nya, yung 20k na iyon ipapamigay nya sa mga kapatid nya. Di lang sa kapatid - pati sa kapitbahay binibigyan pera. Nagpapakatay ng baboy and then literally kahit sino pumupunta para makikain, etc. Super generous talaga.

So what her mom did was each time nagpapadala husband nya, she got another bank account na joint with my friend. It's treated as emergency fund na gagalawin lang in case of emergencies. So far nakasave na sya ng 60k and counting

[cutemama]

Kami naman very transparent about sa money.. actually hubby ko humahawak ng pera namin esp. salary ko. humihingi lang ako allowance from him, kasi masyado ako magastos, bili ng bili ng kung ano2..pero now parang gusto ko na magsave ng pera na hindi niya alam.. kasi lately medyo nagiging magastos na siya, lalo na sa car niya kung ano ano na lang binibili ang mamahal pa naman..

Yung SIL ko naman sinesekreto niya sa  sa hubby niya mga bonuses niya kasi wala pa silang baby pero yung hubby niya sobrang hilig sa gadget palit ng palit ng cellphone and sa car din kung ano ano binibiling accesories..

Kaya I think ok lang magsave ng pera na hindi alam ni hubby, ok lang siguro malaman na may savings ka pero wag mo na lang sabihin kung magkano.. heheh dahil sa gt natuto ko mag tipid and magsave.

[enchoi]

may naalala akong funny incident regarding sa pagtatago ng bonus.  kasi two officemates ko na guys ay magkasama sa iisang hospital yung mga asawa nila.  One time, nagbigay ng 100% bonus yung company namin.  Yung isa binigay in full yung bonus nya.  Yung isa 50% lang daw ang dineclare sa asawa.

after one month, nagkausap yung mga misis nila at dun nagkaalaman... naku giyera patani silang mag-asawa. ang reason nung ka-officemate ko kasi magastos yung asawa nya at para rin naman sa emergency yun.  yung wife naman nya ang iniisip ay may babae, or may bisyo, or pinagdadamutan sila.  it took them awhile bago nagkabati... kinailangan pa nyang magrequest sa bank ng print out ng kanyang statement of account para lang patunayan sa wife nya na di nya wini-withdraw at di ginastos sa kung saan man.  up to this day... every bonus lagi pa rin namin syang kinakantyawan tungkol dun hehe

[cutemama]

I think mas big deal talaga sa girls pag pinagtataguan sila ng pera ng mga asawa nila.. kahit ako pag nalaman kong pinagtataguan ako ng hubby ko war din aabutin niya sakin hehe..

Pero most of the husbands naman deadma lang unless super seloso ng hubby mo..

I remember din yung friend ko nakita niya yung passbook ng hubby niya nagwithdraw ng 10k twice so bale 20k lahat..bukod kasi sa joint account may individual account din sila nung hindi pa sila marries..
Nag away sila kasi nagtataka siya bakit nag withdraw ng ganun iniisip niya may babae or nagsusugal.. yun pala binigay sa magulang niya kasi may emergency daw..hindi niua daw sinabi agad sa friend ko kasi daw baka magalit medyo under niya kasi yung guy..

[j.adore]

It's not a secret but I do have my maiden accounts where I have my savings from before we got married. He knows how much is there kasi we use the same finance tracker software. He treats it as my own, wala siya pakialam. Likewise, he has his own accounts and I know how much is there. He gives all of his salary in our joint accounts.

Wala concerns whatsoever kasi ako taga manage ng budget at expenses. He wants it that way taga hingi lang daw siya haha!

[blackgreen]

Kami sis dipa kasal, ang gusto ni h2b siya magmamanage ng joint account namin, sige lang sabi ko oo. Pero nag-usap kami na yun savings namin before we will marry kaniya kaniya na yun, tapos a portion of my salary itatago ko under my maiden bank account for emergency purposes.

We believe din na dapat transparent kami sa lahat ng finances, pero ayun nga meron money na ako ang may sole custody.

[28Leslie]

He knows how much is there kasi we use the same finance tracker software.

Hi j.adore, pwede ko bang malaman kung anong finance tracker gamit mo?

ako nag mamanage ng finances namin as of now, pero gusto kong maging transparent at involve si hubby. salamat!

[j.adore]

Quicken 😊

[simpleemie]

hide- i dont pero di naman nya inaalam kung magkano laman ng bank account ko so di ko rin sinasabi lol.

[28Leslie]

Quicken

Thank you!!!

[sarsingkit]

100% transparent. We know each other's salaries, bonuses, savings pati expenses. We share savings account and credit cards.

To answer TS' question, I think it is okay to have separate accounts but I don't vote for the idea of hiding it from your partner.