Problems you encounter while preparing for your wedding (Part 6)

[edna_mode]

new house mga sis bago pa ma-lock yung previous thread

previous home: http://www.femalenetwork.com/girltalk/index.php/topic,284952.0.html
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Regarding the kids.. Kami kase strict kami na adult reception. Ang kids lang na present are those na kasama sa entou which is mga pamangkin ko lang naman din. Siguro you can allow na isama yung mga kids since hindi naman sila 'excess' guests technically.. Although kung maraming bata kase kagulo ang reception nyan.

Same here we wanted an adult reception. Nagdalawang isip ako dito before kase kids can add character to the wedding and it's really fun when they're around.. giggling, laughing.. But then naisip din namin na it could also go the other way. Baka mag maktol during the ceremony.. yung tipong palahaw ng iyak or manggugulo during the reception.  Not to mention, if you allowed guests to bring their kids, most likely kasama ang mga yayas so additional headcount din yun.

In fact, the wife of the officemate ni fiance wanted to bring her baby along.  At first pumayag si fiance (without me knowing) so i had to remind si fiance na hindi pwedeng basta na lang namin payagan kase it would be unfair for other guests who agreed to leave their kids at home. So nung sinabi na nya sa officemate nya that we're having an adult reception, hindi naman na sila umangal and agreed that they will find someone to babysit.  Yung wedding daw namin will be their 'date night' ng magasawa

[blackgreen]

Pag adults anong age yun? meron kasi ako gusto mga iinvite na mga pinsan pero gusto rin naman namin limited lang ang guests. Di kakayanin ng venue namin.

[edna_mode]

^siguro sis it differs for every couple.  In our case, it's more like kids below 8 yrs old are the ones we were hoping to exclude from the event.   Meron kaming mga 1 or 2 guests who will be bringing their kids who are 9 and 10 years old kase yung isa walang mapag iiwanan and yung isa naman brother ng FG namin. But that's about it

I have teenager cousins who will be at the event. Although they are not 'technically' adults yet (18 yrs old) pero shempre they are still invited 

[blackgreen]

^thanks sis. Yun mga pinsan ko naman age 11/12. So hindi naman na siguro sila magulo. Hahaha..

[Maxim04]

Sana nga yung mga bata e maisipan nila ihabilin muna. Kasi pag may mga kids sa venue shempre magulo at maglalaro mga yun.. Heheh

[simang]

Pag adults anong age yun? meron kasi ako gusto mga iinvite na mga pinsan pero gusto rin naman namin limited lang ang guests. Di kakayanin ng venue namin.

Pre-teens is fine by me. Actually yung mga anak ng cousins ko, age range nila nasa 12-15 ganyan, i really wanted to invite them kase alam ko maeexcite sila magbihis and magpakakikay for my wedding. You know, teen girls these days. Haha. Strict lang kami sa adult reception kase una, we will be serving alcohol in an open bar. Pangalawa, ayokong mastress pag nag tantrums sila haha. Pangatlo, we want our ceremony to just be laid back and solemn so having kids running and screaming around is quite not apt for the occasion. Ang kids lang talaga na kasama sa reception ay yung mga immediate pamangkin namin ni fiance (aged 2 and 4).

[blackgreen]

^pre-teens naman yun mga pinsan ko. Ang ayoko rin yun kids talaga kasi una dagdag headcount tsaka pangalawa yun nga baka magulo sila.

[bonzaigirl]

Problems you encounter while preparing for your wedding:

Hmmm... How about your future mother-in-law who is really nice naman, she is really nice and I am not being sarcastic when I say this but she is really nice.  It's just that, she has a tendency to always "suggest"  suppliers or ideas regarding our wedding.  And it's okay to suggest naman, I understand that she is also excited for our wedding, because this is the only wedding wherein they will really be a part of.  It's just that sometimes it's quite frustrating because I don't want to offend her feelings, but some of the suppliers that she is referring is to, is really .. well.. how do I say this, but hindi ko talaga feel. 

Me and si fiance, we already talked about our wedding before pa, we want it to be intimate, and as much as possible we will only be inviting close relatives and friends.  As in 150 lang talaga.  Our ninongs and ninangs, we want them to be close to us as well, yung talagang mag guigide sa amin throughout our marriage.

Pasensya na if I'm ranting, it's really quite superficial, pero kasi pag inipon mo na ang dami na nya.

 Like, she wanted us to use the wedding rings na  hindi nya naibenta nung may jewelry store pa sila. It's a good thing that my fiance said no.  Kasi it wasn't us.  Plus the ring doesn't look good with my engagement ring (which she gave us as well, which I am really thankful for).  The ring just doesn't characterize us ni fiance.

Ninongs and ninangs.  Shempre my mom also already has a list of godparents, and she as well.  I already told my mum, na kami ang pipili.  Kaya it's okay for her to list things down, pero it will be upto us.  Si fiance sinabihan nya din ang mum nya.  Sabi pa nga ni fiance, he only wants 5 pairs. Pero dahil sa madaming friends si MIL, dumami yung godparents list namin naging 8 pairs na.  Gusto nya nga 10, pero we already put our foot down.  Negosyante kasi si MIL.  Ngayon pag may nakikilala syang investor, gusto nya kunin namin as godparent or as a supplier.  Kahit hindi nya pa talaga nakikita yung quality of work. 

Photo/video, sabi nya wag na kami kumuha ng sa labas.  At friends na lang daw ni lola ang kukuha sa amin.  Photojournalist kasi si Lola ni fiance.  Pero sabi nga ni fiance, nung sinabi ko sa kanya, iba ang quality ng gawa ng wedding photographer sa photographer na iba ang forte.  At buti na lang, by that time, eh nakapagdown na kami sa P/V namin.

Tapos pati bridal march, gusto nyang kunin namin is yung gusto nyang song. Maganda yung song, pero its just not good for a bridal march.  Plus we already have songs for the bridal march.   Tapos pati wedding bouquet ko, ganun din. 

Ang pinaka malupit eh gusto nyang kunin ko yung wedding gown / entourage gowns and suits dun sa kaibigan nya.  Na nung tiningnan ko naman yung website is...  Well it's really tacky.  Cute yung mga pang flower girls, but yung may nakita ako na post na for debutante gown, it was really tacky.

Ang superficial ng rant ko di ba.  Kaya lang nastrestress ako kasi ayaw ko talaga ma offend si MIL. Nauubusan na ko ng excuses.    Hindi ko na alam minsan kung paano ako sasagot ng maayos.    

Sinabi ko na naman na meron na akong napupusuan na couturier.  Pero hay...    

Pasensya na ha kung ang superficial ng rant ko.  I know I should be lucky, marami pang mga brides to be and mga brides na mas madami ang problema sa akin. hehe.  Wala lang. nagsasabi lang.    Happy stressful preps sa mga brides na tulad ko  hehe.


 

[belle_v2g]

^ohh. Terrible

Is she sharing ba on your expenses?

[120515]

hi bonzaigirl, it's okay to let out steam. anyway, if i would be in your position, i would also be stressed. it's great that your fiance is there to help you out to dissuade her or tell her no.

[bonzaigirl]

^ohh. Terrible

Is she sharing ba on your expenses?

No, all expenses will be shouldered by fiance and me.

[bonzaigirl]

hi bonzaigirl, it's okay to let out steam. anyway, if i would be in your position, i would also be stressed. it's great that your fiance is there to help you out to dissuade her or tell her no.

Thank you sis 120515.  Tuwing nag susuggest si MIL, sinasabi ko naman kay HtoB.  And even yung mga comments ko alam din ni fiance.  Ang sabi nga lang nya eh, nakukulitan na daw ba ako sa mommy nya hehe.  Siyempre minsan, nakukulitan na talaga ako.  Ang kinakatakot ko lang kasi is you know, at the end of the day, may masabi sila na masama sa akin     And ayaw ko  na pag awayin namin ni fiance yung mga ganyang maliliit na bagay.   

Aja!! Kaya natin ito!! 

[blackgreen]

^i feel you sis. Ganyan din si MIL2b. I posted my issues with her last month. Just be always nice when saying No and na meron kang gustong iba suppliers.

[bonzaigirl]

thanks sis blackandgreen.  Yun na nga.  I am known for being mataray.  Pero talagang kagat-dila ako. Alam ko naman kasi na excited din sya.  Kaya nga I am also trying to include her in my wedding preps. Well... invited sya sa food tasting namin.  Eh ang allowed lang is 4.  So dapat ang kasama ko eh mum ko, and best friend ko who is also my MOH and sya.  Ayun ang mangyayari eh hindi na kasama si best friend, kasi eh may isasama pa syang iba.  O di ba.  Minsan tuloy naisip ko, wag nalang namin ituloy tutal ikakasal naman kami civilly this July.  Yun lang nga hindi sa Pinas.  Pero shempre eto yung talagang gusto nila.  Kasi ito yung makikita nila na makakasama sila.  Kaya eto.  Kailangan lalo na habaan ang pisi          Nakakasakit sa ulo. hehe

[blackgreen]

^hahaha!! Umabot din ako sa ganyan sabi ko ke h2b magpakasal na lang kaming 2 na kami lang. Para wala na sakit ulo.

[j.adore]

Try to take it in a more positive light kasi you guys include her in the preps kaya siguro feel na feel mag suggest. Kailangan niyo establish na she's there for moral support. Maybe your fiancé can have heart to heart talk with his mom?

Siguro instead of asking you can start informing. Diyan sa FT sample, sabihin mo, punta tayo sa caterer. 4 lang pwede so si mama po, ikaw, maid of honor ko saka ako.

Pag may suggestions, thank her then say check niyo kung bagay sa hanap niyo na style. Tipong I'll get back to you response.

Try to relax. Don't count the frustrations kasi tama ka, important relationship with the in laws. Kailangan mo lang ng Ibang maneuver 😉

[bonzaigirl]

Thanks sis j.adore   Actually ganyan nga yung ginagawa namin   .  We've already informed her na 4 lang ang pwedi sa food tasting.  Ang sagot nya sa amin, ay ganun ba, baka pwedi pa nating isama si ganito.  Sasama ko sya ha.  Ang sagot ng mum ko eh she will check. hehe.    We have informed her naman before pa, and by informing her, we included her sa preps, kasi ayaw naman namin syang ma left out.  Kasi wala syang anank na babae eh.  Kaya lang di ko naman na-expect na sa lahat eh she will really have an input.  Kasi nga yung mum ko eh kung ano lang sabihin ko.  Kung may suggestion sya eh very minimal.  Sa mga ninongs and ninangs lang.  At kung pagkatapos ba ng new moon ang wedding date nmin ni hubby2be. 

And you are right, I should take it in a more positive light. I am praying hehe...

[simang]

^hahaha!! Umabot din ako sa ganyan sabi ko ke h2b magpakasal na lang kaming 2 na kami lang. Para wala na sakit ulo.

Even now na nakapagbook na kami ng most suppliers, minsan naiisip ko pa din ito, na mag civil wedding na lang kami na kaming 2 lang. Actually this was our original plan. I wanted a secret civil wedding at first. In fact, February 2015 ang target date namin noon. Gusto ko kaming 2 lang and then maybe 2 other close friends. Tapos we were going to tell our families kapag kasal na kami.

Ngayon naiisip ko pa din na sana tinuloy na lang namin yung plan na yun. Hindi naman dahil sa nasstress kami sa preps, pero more of hindi na ko makahintay, lol. Less gastos pa. Haha. He insisted on a church wedding kase ayaw nya na may masabi parents ko since youngest ako. Also, gusto nyang mag photoshoot. Hahaha. Oh well.

[skela96c]

not really a problem pero a point of concern:  hatian sa guestlist between my groom and i.

as it is kasi, sa 90pax, 50 ang kanya, 40pax ang sa akin. when i decided na sige sagarin na namin to invite 100pax (since 100pax ang min. ni caterer), aba sabihin ba naman na 60pax na daw kanya at 40pax pa din sa akin. madami daw kasi syang kaibigan at sino ba daw ang iinvite ko.  ABA! TEKA! so sabi ko, pakasal na lang siya with his friends, invite nya na lang ako. 

sobrang tinigasan ko nga ang puso ko pag gawa ng guestlist ko (lol!) tapos sya gusto i-invite lahat. duh.

[bzbee]

^ sis dito din kami nahirapan ni h2b. guest list namin umabot ng 220 pero 150 lang target namin. we tried to take off names from the list pero sobrang hirap siya talaga, mas madali pa para saken ang magbawas. ganun yata talaga? in the end, we agreed to pay for additional heads na lang para wala ng tampuhan.