Losing hope

[queeniemae21]

Hi mga sis, wala na talaga akong mapagsabihan kaya gumawa ako ng account dito. When I was younger ( Im 30 years old now), kagaya ng iba, ang pangarap ko lang naman ay makatapos ng college at magkaroon ng magandang trabaho. Kaya lang, dahil sa sabay sabay kaming nag-aaral na apat na magkakapatid, vocational course lang ang natapos ko because i need to work to help my father send my other siblings to school. Although, hindi ako ang panganay, im the second eldest, ako ang nag sacrifice for my siblings. So nakatapos silang lahat, dalawang engineers and isang management graduate. Samantalang ako hangang ngayon, strugling pa rin kasi hirap nga akong makipagcompete sa mga may degree at mas bata. im currently unemployed. Nakapagtrabaho ako dati sa mga semicon companies, nakapag aborad din ako sa taiwan for two years. Pero hindi ako naging masaya kaya ending umuwi ako. Parang hindi pa rin ako maka-get over sa pangarap ko na magka degree gaya ng mga kapatid ko. Dati kasi, ako talaga ang may pinakamataas na grades sa aming magkakapatid. kaya hindi ko talaga matanggap na ganito lang nangyari sa akin. I tried call center pero di rin ako tumagal.Sumasagi sa isip ko na mag aral ulit, willing naman akong tulungan ng kapatid kong engineer. Kaya lang worried ako kasi by the time na makatapos ako ng four year course, 33-34 na ako, baka wala nang tumanggap sa akin. Ano kayang course ang walang age limit pagdating sa paghahanap ng work. By the way, ang vocational course ko ay information technology. Minsan parang ayaw ko nang gumising sa umaga kasi parang wala namang direksyon ang buhay ko. I have a boyfriend who is very supportive but hindi pa rin sya stable. Maayos ko pa kaya ang buhay ko at my age.PS: I have a talent for drawing and illusration , ito lang ang tangi kong maipagmamalaki..Help naman mga sis..

[nene1117]

hi sis, wag ka mawalan ng pagasa.. kung gusto mo makagradute, ituloy mo lang... if sakaling IT ang gusto mo ipursue, go ka lang..who cares kung 35 ka makagraduate, ang mahalaga is kaya mo makipagcompete sa mga batang freshgrads like you... kahit sabihin mong same kayo ng knowledge level, your edge with the young ones is you're more matured
kaso sempre pag maghahanap ka na  ng work, expect mo na pang fresh grad ang salary offer sayo, but don't worry tataas naman yun later.. in fact medyo mataas ang salary range ng IT compared sa ibang field...
naalala ko dati, meron kami contractor sa  company namin but vocational lang siya..magaling siya kaso di siya pwedeng mapromote even maregular kasi di siya BS degree..
But if kung maisip mo rin na wag na magtuloy magaral. may mga kakilala naman ako na successful sa business..so I think kaya mo rin

[Harper]

Do not dwell in the past sis.  Going back to school is a good decision - try web designing, graphic illustrator or cartoon animation ... since you are already talented in drawing and illustration; and wala ding age limit dyan cause skills naman ang importante sa ganyang career.

[chicafabulosa]

Sis do what mkes you happy. If your happiness is going back to school, then do it. Sa education sis walang matanda, walang bata. Sa paghahana ng trabaho, may open minded na ngayon sis. Mas gusto ng mga company na new ideas from fresh graduates. Dont lose hope. I remember my dad said before " once you start hoping, then you already stop living". Dont dwell sa past, kasi you wont be able to mve on if you keep on thinking yung past and all what ifs mo sa life. As for your question na maayos mo pa ba buhay mo ...

Depende yan sis sa determination mo na magkaron ng maayos na buhay. Di guarantee na pag may tinapos ka, magiging maayos buhay mo. Ang ikakaganda ng buhay natin is nakasalalay sa determination natin to improve on what we have now. Continue to dream. Dream big sis. Walang masama na mangarap. It will help you motivate to strive harder.

And always ask for God's guidance. I hope this helps.

[Andmont]

Hi sis!

Naku sis, wag ka mawawalan ng pag-asa. Halos parehas tayo ng sitwasyon. Hindi pa rin ako nakakatapos ng kahit anong BS degree pero eto ako at nagsusumikap na matapos (im 25 btw).
Mataas din ang grades ko nung HS at akala nga ng mga classmates ko ay malayo ang mararating ko.
Oo, nakakahinayang na hindi tayo agad nakapagtapos ng kolehiyo pero hindi dapat tayo sumuko o mahiya na ipagpatuloy ito. Wala naman masama kung gusto ng isang tao ang matuto. Kaya go lang tayo sis.

Since nasabi mo na rin naman na may nakuha kang vocational course na IT. Pwede mo ipagpatuloy yun at ang IT ay isa sa mga industriya na walang age restriction.

AT nasabi mo na rin na may talent ka sa pagdrawing/illustration. Magagamit mo yan sis sa web development. Endless possibilities kung may talent sa pagdrawing at marunong ka mag-code.
Go lang sis!

[CityHunter]

Hi, queeniemae21

As many have opined here ay do not lose hope.  For if you do then no matter how much blessings come your way ay you will never be happy. 

The main question you need to answer ay anong direction ba ang gusto mo tahakin sa buhay?  You mentioned many stuff but none that point to what you really want to do in life. 

We can suggest courses that you can take and even be in demand of but not unless that is in harmony sa wants and needs mo ay useless lang.  And hindi rin always na maging employee ka lang.  As some have said ay may option ka rin to go into business. 

Reflect mo muna on what exactly you do have now and anong mga options you are open to.

FYI.  Let me give you an example.  There was a guy who, like you, learned about computer stuff.  Pero old na siya so he retired.  Alam mo naman here hindi ka sigurado kung may mabibili ka pa sa pension you get or what savings you have.  So he went into a small business at first.  Ginamit niya yun kaalaman niya - computer.  Pero hindi ordinary na computer.  He fixes and reprograms CAR COMPUTERS.  He used his earnings to buy mga auctioned or damaged cars nowadays then fixes them up then sells them competitively maliban pa doon sa mga nagpapagawa sa kanya ng mga car computers nila.  Kasama diyan mga ilang casa - meaning official talyer ng mga big brands.

[agape]

Wala naman age limit Sa IT. Depends na Lang Sa company. The reason for the age limit is they want teachable employees, and be able to impart the company's culture to them, older employees are harder to teach, influence or bend. In my resume, I leave out my age, no need to put in personal data and subject yourself to prejudice. Besides, they will know your age based on years of experience.

having a degree will give you better chances of keeping a job and getting promoted. I am thinking pa rin of getting a masteral degree. I love learning, I just don't like studying, there's a difference. Always strive for self-improvement.

[brideindream1234]

Hi Sissy.. wag ka mawalan ng pag asa.. tandaan mo wala sa age yan, tama sila, isa pa di naman ibig sabihin pag nakatapos ka e magiging successful kana.. but its really a key, I suggest kung vocational course mo IT, ituloy mo na yan ng 4 year course, kung ayaw mo naman huminto ok lang, continue mo magwork while schooling, kasi naintindihan kita sa part na pag nag stop ka magwork, back to zero ka.. ituloy mo na yan, kesa palipasin mo ang oras, simulan mo na ngayon, wag ka mainip kung medyo matagal, ang mahalaga ginagawa mo na ang way para maachieve mo, kesa sa susunod kapa makapag decide na mag aral.. kaya mo yan! Tyaga lang sissy! Ako nga nag aaral while working, swerte lang na may work from home ako kaya I get to balance work and school. Godbless you!

[Girltalker2]

TS, walang mawawala sayo if you go back to school sis. Unless nakahanap ka na ng work now, you might consider part time.

Choose your school and course wisely. Since you're in the IT field, alamin mo ano ang in demand now and potentially in later years para sa gayon di ka maging obsolete. But I guess nature na ata talaga ng IT ang continuous learning at maya't maya ang upgrade ng nga hardware at software.

Gaya mo I'm also unemployed and I'm not happy about it considering I've done a handful of interviews pero wala pako ma convince to hire me. So I'm taking this time to do my self improvement stuff na medyo na neglect ko during my busier days. And I'm going back to school muna while having interviews (coupled with rejections after rejections), while waiting for the job for me.

TS, I'm a lot older than you, kaya kung ako puede pa mag aral, ikaw pa kaya?

[killbill]

Hi sis, share ko lang ang story ko. I am an undergraduate na hanggang second year first sem lang and a single mom. Yung ate ko graduate ng UST working for a big company for 10 years already, yung asawa niya may decent job din naman and may isang anak.

Sila baon sa utang sa credit card, no savings. Hindi sa nagyayabang pero I have savings, i earn more than her, also meron akong sari sari store, never akong nag credit card.

I have a cousin na hanggang grade 5 lang, nag home school tapos nag TESDA. Tumatabo sya ng 6 digits as a real estate broker.

For me hindi importante kung nakapag tapos ka or hindi. Ang mahalaga eh madiskarte ka sa buhay, marunong sa pera, at driven. Higit sa lahat wag mag give up. Always think positive.

[bisous]

I hope that you are doing OK.

I am still in my 20s, but even as a teenager I had the pressure of always making the right moves - studying the right degrees, working in the right sectors, having the right resume.  It has helped a lot but at the same time, it ends up to how we feel about ourselves and our loved ones.

So don't feel alone with this pressure.

At the same time, I see life as a game of chess, and that includes careers.  The more we go on, the less moves and counter-moves we can make until....we just start a new game of chess and do it all over again. 

[candygrenade]

You only lose the moment you surrender yourself to self-deprecating limiting beliefs.

It is not about having the right degree, diploma, age or connections.

Because most of the time, it is really all about having the RIGHT MENTALITY.

[freelancer_babe]

Kumusta kaya si queenie? Di na nakapag-update kung ano ang nangyari sa kanya?

[lalala718]

Dumadating pala talaga yung time sa buhay natin na nawawalan na tayo ng pag-asa. Kasi ako, this is how i feel right now. Hindi pa kasi talaga ako sigurado kung ano ba ang gusto kong gawin sa buhay ko. Magdadalawang taon na since i graduated at heto at wala pa rin akong nararating. Pabago-bago ako ng isip. Gulong-gulo na ako. Pakiramdam ko ako na ang pinakamalaking disappointment na nangyari sa buhay ng parents ko. 

[ihaveadream]

Hi Sis! I just want to share my story baka makatulong...

I took up BS Accountancy 11 years ago, kaso naka 1 year lang dahil na problemang pinansyal. Nagwork ako sa fastfood, sa mga factories at nag DH in HK for 6 years, umuwi nung 2013 - nag-call center for more than a year. Pinag-aral ko ang kapatid ko sa UST, CPA na siya, ngayon siya ang nagpapa-aral sa'kin. June 2014 nag enrol na ko ulit. 28y.o na ko, married, walang kids, at 1st year AB Communication student. Dati nababother din ako sa thought na 31 na ko pag kagraduate ko, kung may tatanggap pa ba sa'kin na work after, pero sabi ng kapatid ko most of the companies hindi na daw nagbi-base sa age ngayon. At naniniwala ako na pag pursigido ka, makakahanap at makakahanap ka ng trabaho.

Pampalakas pa ng loob:
Yung pinsan ng asawa ko gumraduate ng 30y.o, Marketing kinuha nya, nakahanap naman sya ng work pagka-graduate.

Kaya natin to sis! We're never too old for school and never too old to be employed! galingan lang natin at sabayan ang fresh ideas ng mga youngsters

[Girltalker2]

^ thanks for sharing your story.

Ito naman ang sad story ko...

I am out of job for almost a year now. Wala pa pala namang one year.  Hindi madali for me to find work, I think I have been scouting for work for 2 years now pero wala talaga. I was looking for something similar to the job I left with a 50% paycut nanga, pero wala parin.  However, I currently do not have a choice but just to keep on trying.

If you are in my shoes, would you demote yourself by applying in a lower position than your prevoius one?  E pano kung wala parin kasi the recruiter/company feels I am too senior?  just enter into a minimum wage job (waitress/clerk/security guard/saleslady)? 

Ayoko mag business - I think this is my problem.  Ayoko talaga. Siguro tamad ngako. I am a worrier by nature kaya feeling ko di ko kakayanin magbusiness especially hanggang bahay dala dala ko yung problema sa business.

By the way, hindi naman sa nagbubuhat ng banko, pero feeling ko may pride din naman ako.  I have an MBA and a BS degree (honors) in one of the top universities/school in Manila.  I worked na for over 10 years as a manager/senior manager. Siguro ito yung next problem ko, parang feeling ko willing nako mag pay cut, pero sana huwag naman pati position, magiging kasabayan ko ang mga fresh grad?  ano nalang ang mararamdaman ko once I accept such a job?  hindi ko maimagine? 

So I guess this is a mid life thing for me.      anyone in the same shoes?

[astarte]

^ hi sis ako naman mag 8 months na yata wala work. The longest period na jobless ako. Due to some reasons though, my contract ended abroad kung kailan need ko talaga kumita ng malaki during those months and when I got back here in PH malapit na ko ikasal so nag hands on ako sa preps.

Now, yung mga inaaplyan ko sis halos pang entry level lang din. 10 years na din ako nag wowork then yung 7 years nun dito sa PH as call center agent, 3 years abroad as IT Consultant sa isang well known company in Australia. I had the world that time, akala ko it will only get better until I lost the job. I had a complete family, supportive fiance na hubby ko na ngayon, friends, the best career, position and job title na I never thought I would even get that chance to be called as such.

So ngayon mostly ng job offers sakin may pay cut na nga, halos entry level position din. Minsan naiisip ko na baka naman talagang I'm not that skilled and talented. Baka sinwerte lang ako and I really didn't deserve what I had abroad. Madalas ko naiisip na hindi lang talaga ako qualified here to be in the same position and to earn an amount close to what I had.

Looking on the bright side, we're still here. Alive. Fighting to survive each day. Hopefully makahanap na ng job soon. Minsan iniisip ko na lang baka may kailangan ako matutunan kaya binibigay ang mga trials na to or baka yung job na naghihintay for me may not be something I exactly wanted pero baka naman magiging mas happy ako so I'm just praying na lang na kung ano yung best for me and my family sana makuha ko na soon hehe!

[Girltalker2]

^ sis, ok lang naman siguro for you now as you have your husband to take care of you. Tsaka naging busy ka sa wedding preps throughout the months na wala kang work? 

tsaka buti may job offer ka rin, you can always start again, or may pride factor kaya ayaw mo tanggapin since hindi ka pa naman nagugutom?  ako kasi this is my dilemma. 

I am a single mom with 2 kids, ni singkong duling di naman ako humihingi sa ex spouse ko.  Ironically, I need to file for a case para magsupport sya (sabi ko tsaka na kung may job nako para may extra funds - but then kung may extra funds I won't need again his support). I have savings naman kasi every since I live below my means.  Pero syempre it is not going to be forever since I want to use my savings sana to buy a house eh hanggang ngayon kasi we are renting. So my rent can use up all my savings.  Kaya napapaisip ngako, Should I take a pay cut that's like 80% cut?  Ngayon nga with 50% cut ni offer wala akong makuha.   

For now, I am filling up my time by studying.  At least umaandar utak ko. Otherwise baka feeling ko sobra nakong ma stagnate.

[oreo08]

My Dad who was an executive manager when he was still alive told me - magtrabaho ka ng walang pride pride. Kahit boss ka at nawalan ka ng trabaho, and then kelangan mo magsimula ulit sa umpisa, wag ka magiinarte. Magpakumbaba ka.

When they migrated to the US, nagwork sya not as an exec but a nightfill sa Macy's very, very humble ng tatay ko and I think dahil sa ugali nyang yan kaya malayo narating nya. This is also what I practice at work. Ok lang kahit sa pinakababang position mo ako ilagay basta related pa rin sa course ko, and I'll show you what I can do.

So ang ending, in 3 years, I've been promoted three times din. My bosses have nothing bad to say about me and all 3 of them lagi sinasabi na sana meron pang isang oreo08, or pwde sana ako iclone to get rid of everyone else

[Girltalker2]

^ thanks for sharing sis.

Masakit man, iyan din ginagawa ko now, willing to start (so long as related to course/experience ko).  Starting from a staff position. But recruiters/companies do not want me parin.    Ayaw nila maniwala I am willing to take a paycut, feeling nila I will just use it as a stepping stone at aalis din eventually.

Kaya ko lang natanong if saleslady/lady security guard/waitress (as theyre totally out of my line) - need ko na ba patulan?  Sobrang pagpapakumbaba naman iyan? The pay is one thing, but the pride, kapag nawala sayo and the esteem, I am not sure how to face people.