My daughter committed suicide..

[kvandenhaak]

^Is he giving child support? Makapal ang mukha nya kung hinde. If the judge is fair, he/she will require your ex to give you monthly child support. Pasalamat sya wala sya dito sa Canada. Kung hindi pati ikaw kailangan nyang bigyan ng financial support. $upot mga lawmakers sa Pilipinas.

[juni]

His reason was I'm not financially capable to support my son. Kaka-resign ko lang 2 months ago (I think) because of what happened but now I have a new job and I'm still adjusting.

That's no reason for you to be declared an unfit mother.  The fact that you are working and taking care of your son despite na kakapanganak mo lang to a premature baby and you're dealing with your daughter's death shows that you are a strong, responsible, resilient and loving parent.  You are looking after your son's needs even when it would've been understandable if you'd taken time out from the world to lick your wounds.

Ang kapal ng mukha ng ex mo ah.  Ang dami na niyang kagaguhang ginawa tapos he still has the nerve to do this to you?!  Walang konsensya yang creep na yan, hindi na nahiya.  In the first place e dapat nagbibigay siya ng child support sayo for your son kasi responsibility niya yun as a father, especially since he's financially capable of doing that.  Hindi yung gagamitin niya yung financial capabilities niya as a weapon to take your son away from you.  Dirtbag talaga ang ex mo.  Hindi ba man lang siya pinagsasabihan ng family niya na mali yung ginagawa niya?

Like sis kvandenhaak said, if the judge is fair, s/he will not side with your ex and will instead require him to provide regular and reasonable child support.  Kung pag-uusapan lang ang fair, dapat nga pati ikaw bibigyan niya ng financial support and hindi lang yung son mo, kasi newborn ang baby mo and premature pa pinanganak at that, as much as possible e tutok dapat ang alaga sa kanya lalo na sa first few years of life.  If your ex was really concerned for the welfare of your son, he would ensure that the baby receives the best possible care, hindi yung papairalin niya yung ego niya and kagaguhan.  The fact na he wants to take your son away from you even though you are a good mother just shows how immature and selfish he is.  He should stop thinking with his @$$ and start thinking with his head, he should man up, it's long overdue na.

I suggest sis na you talk to good lawyers, as well as advocacy groups for women and children.  They can help you not only with the legalities, but they also have other resources like support groups or therapy sessions din.  It might help you na makarinig ng experiences ng other women, so that you know that you are not alone in this and that things will get better, that other women have gone through this and have triumphed and now lead better lives.

[zanabee]

Be strong sis, no words can describe how painful your situation is. Suicide is a very painful one, it also happened to us just recently in our family, if we could only turn back time kaya lang di na pwede. Sis i pray that the justice system in our country will be on your side. You are a loving mother and your son needs you the most. God bless you sis! Pray harder. God loves you. Remember Job in the bible. At the moment you will be his living testimony.

[dainejen]

napakahirap ng pinagdadaanan mo ngayon sis.. be strong sabi nga ng lahat.. sa ganyang panahon na sobrang sakit dapat may mapaglabasan ka nyan, sasabihin siguro ng iba na immature pero sa tingin ko maganda talaga na kasuhan mo na. lahat ng galit mo dun mo ilabas. talk to a lawyer, kung walang work try sa PAO, may mga requirements sila.

dun sa pangaabandona nya sa inyo kung may naging epekto yun emotionally -  which is napakalaki yata  pwede sya makasuhan, sa panloloko nya, yung epekto nun sa inyo kaso nanaman.. yung sa nangyari sa  bata dahil sa kanya baka meron din. sya pa may lakas ng loob mag file ng case, obligasyon nya supportahan yung baby mo,pwede rin sya makasuhan pag hindi.. talk to a lawyer para malaman natin kung ano dapat gawin. nakakapanginit ng ulo yang husband mo.

hindi pwede na matapos lahat ng ginawa nya sa inyo magtatagumpaypa sya o yayaman.. dapat may justice. ano yun nawalan ka ng 2 tapos sya magpapakasaya at magaabroad. naku sana makulong yan. pag naisipan mo na idemanda sya at may lawyer na, sabihin mo kay lawyer na may plano umalis ng bansa para di makaalis.

[ejxtwo]

Thank you for the replies, sissies. Binawi nya na yung petition for my son's custody and magbibigay daw sya ng support samin. Nagbago ang ihip ng hangin, now gusto nya balikan ko sya and he even forced me to do "it". But I already settled everything sa court regarding our marriage. I don't want to waste my time on him. Focus nalang ako sa work and son ko.

2 days before Mikee's first month, she visited me again in my dreams. I usually visit her everyday but I failed yesterday because of my work and her baby brother's check-up. Most of the time, I force the thought of my daughter out of my head - not because I don't miss her but I still can't bear pain. It's like the pain will hit me then it won't then it will hit me again. But I can't get her out of my head, I just can't. Almost 1 month after what happened, I still can't accept the fact that I'm one of the reasons why she took her own life. I miss her. I miss my daughter so much and I feel so bad not being able to do anything about it. Hindi ko na sya mababalik sakin. I really don't know how to start a new life without her. She's the kind of daughter that any mom would love to have. Hay, I miss my Mikaela very much...

(sorry if dito ko sinasabi yung feelings ko about my daughter, I really don't talk about it with anyone except here, akala ng iba strong ako... yes I'm trying but deep inside I'm still weak)

[chiqmom]

^sis, tight hugs for you. Nababasa ko din post mo sa other thread and its so heartbreaking to read what you are going through right now. Please stop blaming yourself, I think ang puno't dulo ng problema mo is yung husband and siya dapat sisihin more than you. But you are such a strong woman sis, like how you take the blame instead of pointing fingers. I pray that your son totally recover and that God bless you.

[ysa.belle]

tama lang ang bawiin niya yung petition for your sons custody. a child should always stay with the mother.

sana matauhan yung ex husband mo, marealize niya mga mali niya at fault niya.

may god continue to bless you and your baby sis. you are a strong woman.

[ceejhei]

I just said my prayers for you and for Mikee. Hugs sis. i also have a daughter and sometimes there are chances na hindi ko siya pinapansin when she talks kasi i am busy with my youngest. made me realize things na dapat dapat talaga bigyan sila ng attention.

Kaya mo yan sis! kinakaya mo na eh, just fight for what is right. God loves you, and Mikee will always be with you. hugs

[ejxtwo]

Thank you so much for the prayers, everyone. Much appreciated.

There's really no day that I don't think about Mikee (and of course, Kito). 1 month na syang wala bukas but it seems like it was just yesterday when I last saw her beautiful face. Words aren't enough to express how much I miss her...

[loveleah]

Sis, I'm grieving with you .. I'm crying right now , saddened by all that you went through and I salute your strength. God will never leave you Sis, just remember that. I will pray for you Sis and your baby and your angels.

[Shadow Angel]

Nakaka sad naman na depressed din ako dati mahirap talaga what if pa para sa teenager na pagdaanan yun depression. Sana soon maging ok na lahat sayo sis kapit lang lalo na para sa bunso mo.

[ejxtwo]

Thank you very much for the prayers sissies. I appreciate them all.

Today is Mikee's 1st month. She was in my dreams again. Unlike before, naka-smile na sya ngayon. She looks very happy. She even told me, "Remember, I love you mommy." Sobrang sakit pa rin talaga. Honestly, parang namatay na din ako. Hindi na ako magiging kumpleto. I miss my daughter very, very much. I wish I took care of her better. The times I didn't share with her because I was so busy with other things, I wish I spent all those times with her instead. Sobrang dami kong regrets.

[chocochips_31]

So sorry to hear that..

[la_chic]

Hi sis, hold on to the Lord and just keep on praying. I may not know you personally but I will also include you in my prayers.

Sad as it is, you first have to accept what had happened. It will help you go thru with the pain. But you will have to accept and believe that you will survive all this. That someday, everything will be clear to you and the wounds will heal. And you CAN start your life all over again.

Kaya mo yan sis... Look deeper into your heart. Gather the Strength you need from your "inner self". Within you is the power to heal. You just have to "tap" it. Ask our Lord for guidance. Meditate.

Program your mind, you have the greatest power to control your thoughts and whenever negativity enters your thoughts, Stop it right away and think of something
Happy. Pwede din gulatin mo ang sarili mo - when you startle yourself, the negativity subsides.

Listen to life coaches like Tony robbins, zig ziglar, and philosophers like Alan watts from youtube. Trust me, it will help you a lot.

Ok stay strong sis. God bless.

[nixiquita]

Its good sis na may outlet ka to pour out all your emotions. But other than gt i believe it will also help if you have close friends or relatives na pwede mo makausap and makasama in real life para mas madali at mas magaan etong pinagdadaanan mo

[theshopaholicprincess]

Sorry to hear about your daughter... I've read your story here in GT few months ago. Condolence sis and kapit lang kay God. I know madaling sabihin and it takes a lot of courage to move forward pero kaya mo yan. I am glad that you have your baby na at home. Look for ways to divert your attention like a hobby or self-help books to read. It also helps if you can have other people you can talk to din in person. Hang on sis.

[agape]

I think it's a good sign that you dream of your daughter and that she is happy now where she is. I'm sure your little angels are in heaven with God.

[ystariray]

This is by far the most heartbreaking thread na nabasa ko dito sa GT. Ang bigat sa dibdib.. May the Lord bring comfort to your heart sis..

[blow_fish]

Sis, prayers that I can only offer.. Naiiyak ako while reading this thread..

[ejxtwo]

After a month without Mikee, sobrang dami ng nagbago. I can't seem do anything without thinking of her. She left me with such difficulty. Thinking I can never see her again. "I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing" ang peg ko when she left. I know she already found the peace she were looking for, she's in a much happier place right now. But I would have done anything for her. If only I could turn back time.

Anyway, thank you very very much for the prayers and sympathy. No words can't explain how thankful I am.