ibuking ang mga babaero sa asawa nila or magpatay malisya?

[carlijn]

Hi guys,

I need your opinion, my husband's cousin has been cheating on his wife for almost 5 years already.  Anyway I found out a few months back that the kabit is pregnant.  And this kabit is actually his first gf that he never got over with or never had a formal break up with when they were younger.  Anyway, this guy is really a pain in the ass, there was a time when he was an instrument in influencing my husband to cheat on me before we got married so I really hate his guts.  And kasabwat na dun eh yung wife nya na kinaibigan pa yung babae.

Ngayon kinakarma yung asawa nya for tolerating that kind of behaviour, halos alam ng buong pamilya nung guy yung tungkol sa kabit pati yung pregnancy nito.  My god this guy's siblings and their families would even go out of town with the kabit at walang kaalam alam yung legal wife. To make matters worse, they guy is even working for the kabit nagli-live in na sila at super lapit lang ng subdivision nila.

Now my question is... should I make an attempt to tell her or maybe give her a clue? or should I turn a blind eye and hayaan at hintayin na lang na magkabukingan.  Pero galing magtago nung lalake pano ba naman tinotolerate din ng mga kapatid.  To think yung ibang mga kapatid ni lalake eh nakikitira lang sa bahay nilang mag-asawa. Ilang years ko na alam yung ganitong sitwasyon pero pagbinuking ko kasi eh malalaman nila na baka sa akin galing at baka kami naman ni hubby ang mag-away.

[sugardrop]

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." - Edward Burke

[princessrio]

siguro if ako, i will not meddle. who knows baka alam naman na ni wifey talaga at hindi lang sya umiimik.

[Girltalker2]

^ Iyan din naisip ko. Baka alam na ng wife ang nangyayari. Baka huli ka na sa balita? hehe 


Questions para kay TS,

Bakit kayo mag aaway mag asawa kung malaman ng hubby mo na ikaw ang nagsabi?  Sasabihin nya pakialamero ka?

Close ba kayo ng wife ng cousin ng hubby mo? Kasi kung close kayo, you can wait siguro na magtanong sya or magconfide sayo.  Kung lumalabas na clueless sya, dito mo nalang nga siguro isipin if you need to tell her.  Pero kasi mas madali magsabi kung close kayo. Kung hindi kayo close kasi, baka lumalabas naninira ka lang.

[snowberry]

Ano ang reason mo to tell the wife? Is it to help the wife  or  para makapag revenge ka lang dahil pag nalaman siempre ng wife , gulo tiyak ang relationship ng mag asawa.

Anyways, pwede rin naman ipaalam using anonymous  text message eh.

[gab54]

Kung ako, I will let the wife know pero anonymous text lang... 

[bonita111809]

I'll secure a proof before I tell the wife. mahirap kase magsabi na walang basehan. masasabihan kang naninira lang. and I will definitely let the wife know. I can't stand seeing another woman with shit on her head.

[nicoletta]

If I'm sure there is a mistress, I will tell the wife secretly.  If close ko si legal wife, I would most definitely tell her and offer to sugod with her even though I am very pregnant haha

[carlijn]

@princessrio I don’t think the wife has a clue because it’s not the first time na nagloko ang asawa nya pero kasi before nahuhuli nya.  And ang pagkakaalam ko yung girl na kabit ngayon eh pinagselosan yun ng husto nung wife kasi nga first gf yun ng hubby nya.  What more ngayon kung malaman nya na buntis pa diba at dalawa silang inuuwian.  Sa araw kay legal wife at sa gabi sa preggy na kabit.

@Girltalker2 Magaaway kami ni hubby if ever malaman nya na sakin manggagaling ang info kasi dati I attempted na na ibuking yung pinsan nya by posting an out of town photo na kasama yung kabit, that was 4 yrs ago ayun inaway ako ni hubby, baka raw magpatayan sila ng pinsan nya sa ginawa ko, kabuwiset diba parang ako pa ang gumagawa ng mali.  Kasama din namin sa outing na yun that time mga kapatid ni lalake, mga pamangkin and friends.  And hindi kami close nung wife unfortunately.   Yun lang isang mali nya I guess kasi husband ko ang pinakaclose na confidant ng asawa nya.  Obviously, kinukwento din sakin ni hubby mga ginagawa nya pinsan nya.
One lesson I learned from this I guess, if your husband has a super close guy- friend or relative at married ito, befriend that wife. LOL you might never know when you will need each other.

@snowberry actually medyo naguguluhan din ako sa reason why kailangan sabihin.  Well I have a couple of reasons
1.   Bilang babae at asawa, ang laking insulto diba noon na kung ikaw nasa sitwasyon ni wife, nakikitira na nga lang yung ibang kapatid ng asawa mo sa pamamahay mo, tapos kinunsinte ng matagal ang kalokohan ng asawa mo.  Nag-oouting pa every summer kasama si kabit, si hubby mo at ibang kamag-anak ng asawa mo while ikaw mukhang t**** sa bahay thinking nasa trabaho kuno asawa mo.  Dumating yung point na ikaw ang bread winner sa family mo at si hubby walang trabaho, pinapakain mo pamilya mo pati mga kamag anak ng asawa mo tapos ganun lang walang respeto sayo.
2.   Part of me also wants revenge I guess, kasi inaway ako dati ni hubby for doing something na mabubuking sana pinsan nya. Kampante kasi yung pinsan nya saka always rude din sa mga hirit nya sakin, like nung buntis ako, he even made me feel so low by saying na yan kasi hindi daw naglalabas ng bahay husband ko kaya buntis na naman ako . Minsan din hubby brought me along kasi bday nung bunsong anak nung pinsan nya shempre may inuman kasi gabi na yun.  Tama bang humirit na “o baket nagdala ka ng bantay”, then when we were about to leave hindi pa nakuntento sinabihan pa ang husband ko ng “o sa susunod ha, alam mo na” meaning sa susunod wag ako isama sa bahay nila. Never ko sinabi kay hubby na nasasaktan ako dahil tinawanan ko lang yun nung time na yun, ayoko ipakita na affected ako . Plus, it’s payback time sa pangungunsinte din ni wife nung nagloko si hubby before we got married because instrumental silang mag-asawa para makilala ni hubby yung naging babae nya dati. 

I just hate that justice hasn’t been served sa mga siraulong lalake thinking they can just get away with anything.  Yes for sure gulo, pero pinili naman ng haliparot na husband nya ang fate nya. Kung magkagulo man nasa legal wife pa rin naman ang desisyon if she will fight for her family or not.
@gab54 Yeah nagtry nako itext noon, I even bought a sim card pero nagpalit na ng number si wife.
@bonita111809  O yeah there is definitely proof, kung kaya lang nya sundan or pasundan  asawa nya makikita nya ang proof nya.  Buntis na buntis si kabit at nagbabahay bahayan sila ng asawa nya.

[imbisibol_]

Magaaway kami ni hubby if ever malaman nya na sakin manggagaling ang info

there's your answer.  why put your own marriage on the line for something you really don't have a right to meddle into?  i will not get involved.  there could also be that desire to bring bad news to the legal wife's doorstep because she was instrumental in previously encouraging your own husband to cheat.  think hard and long first about why you are itching to get involved. 

[Girltalker2]

TS, siguro focus on your marriage na muna now.  medyo nakakabother lang talaga.  What does your hubby think about his pinsan?  Ok lang, it's his life, kaya hayaan nalang?  why does your hubby like to hang out with people like that?  Is he capable of doing such a thing as well?  Bakit ganun ang pamilya ng cousin ng hubby mo?  Wala ba silang delikadesa?

[bluish_mommy]

to the TS, don't meddle with their mess.. just let them taste their own dose of medicine, wag mo ng bahiran pa ng dumi ang sarili mo. sa palagay ko kasi nakakakita ka ng opportunity para maghiganti eh, hindi ba't mas masarap na higanti yung makita mo na lang silang naluluto sa sarili nilang mantika?

so don't mess around, mind your own life.

[nixiquita]

Sa mga close friends ko and relatives, i would tell the truth. Other than stating the fact that shes being cheated on, wala na. I mean, i wouldnt meddle on anything else other than that. From that point on, its gonna be her decision na. Atleast then, she knows already and shes aware. Kesa mafeel niyang everyones not concerned about her at binabackstab lang siya ng LAHAT.

Id tell her, whatever the consequence is. Pero if shes not really close to me, kibit balikat na lang.

[aquacharly]

I always squeal. Lol

But this set-up of relatives willingly conniving and encouraging kab1tches -- may mga ganyan palang .......

So, given that this is a family of ...........   Collaborators...  Pag squeal ka, everybody including your hubby will get mad at you.  Puede ring hindi mani wala si wife kasi... It seems she PRETENDS nothing is wrong.  Weird that wala syang alam for the past 5 years?

You should write down all details/info in an anonymous letter to the wife.
Tapos write down wifey should validate on her own, secretly -- parang the collaborators do not forewarn her hubby or help in the cover- up. 
If she ignores your letter -- that's her decision. Leave it at that. 

[vermich]

I have a feeling alam ni wife na may kabit si hubby nya. She's just turning a blind eye to the matter.. bakit kasama si kabit sa outings ng pamilya at sya hindi? Kung siguro nga close kayo ni wife e you can check the affairs of their marriage peroi ts not good meddling with someone elses affairs. Tama TS nakakagigil ang ganitong mga lalaki who thinks they can get away with everything.

Sabi ng marami who got cheated on or who cheated, their closest circle of friends <relatives> have/ had cheated as well.  You and hubby do not see eye to eye in terms of letting the wife of his cousin know about the affair. Could it be ayaw ng pamilya ng guy dun sa legal wife? There are families like that who will tolerate their son's/ daugther's infidelity para tuluyan mapahiwalay sa legal spouse.. sila pa gagawa ng paraan. (Wala lang usual plot ito sa mga teleserye hehe) 

[simang]

^happened to my cousin (the last part). Sobrang kinunsinte ng family nya yung guy cousin ko to continue the affair dahil ayaw nila dun sa wife. Nakakaawa yung wife grabe. Now yung guy cousin ko is ilang yrs ng nasa abroad, with the other woman, and i believe wala silang contact nung wife nya. Parang nung pagkaalis ng pinsan ko, wala na parang inabandon na nya yung wife nya. Automatic nagkaron ng gf where he works and yun yung sinuportahan ng family nya. Mukhang t**** lang kase 1 or 2 yrs palang silang kasal nun eh.

Stop meddling na lang, lalo na kung hindi kayo ganun kaclose ng wife. As much as you want to do good, lalabas at lalabas kase yung selfish agenda lalo na hindi naman nga kayo usually nagpapakialamanan sa buhay.

Feeling ko din alam ng wife yan. So let them clean their mess up.

[yanmae]

Kawawa naman yung legal wife

Kung ako din sa position mo sis parang gusto ko din sabihin pero mas maigi ng sya mismo ang maka discover nun. Lalabas kasing nangingialam ka at baka lahat pa magalit sayo. Meron pala talagang ganyang pamilya, may asawa na yung guy kinukunsinte pa, sana kung ayaw nila kay legal wife umpisa palang kinontra na nila ayan tuloy lahat sila nagkakasala..

[mooncake and leaves]

huwag mo na sabihin. you said it yourself, gusto mo lang gumanti and your husband already said he's against it. kung siya na kadugo mismo is staying out of it, you have to respect his decision and do the same. eventually, the wife will know and hopefully through someone who genuinely cares about her. that is, if she doesn't already know.

[maiandra]

I honestly don't think the wife is the last to know. May kutob na yan dati pa. Imposibleng wala. Pero anyway check mo din ang motives mo sis, kung sasabihin mo nga dahil lang sa naiinis ka, wag na lang. Pero kung may true concern ka talaga sa tao as a friend, then go.

As they say, nothing bursts the bubble faster than reality.

[carlijn]

Hi guys,

so far wala pa naman ako ginagawa kasi nagiisip pa rin naman ako.. thanks for all the advice.  Well I guess may benefit din naman siguro for me if I don't attempt ibuking si lalake sa wife nya ngayon because I can always use that to my advantage na hindi na ako aasarin at bubuwisitin nung pinsan ni hubby especially sa gatherings because I can always threaten to expose him regardless kung magalit mga kamag anak nila sa akin, alam na rin naman ni hubby na yun ang next step ko at gagawin ko talaga sa harap ng angkan nila kapag nag below the belt mga hirit ng pinsan nya.

Pero I believe talaga walang alam si wife, because wala sigurong babae na nasa katinuan ang papayag na yung asawa mo eh nagtatrabaho sa kabit... may business kasi itong si kabit at mukha talagang clueless yung asawa.  Lahat kasi kasabwat ni lalake. Unless abnormal sha na pumapayag na dalawa silang inuuwian.  Maatim ba ng isang babae na tatabi sayo asawa mo knowing  na may iba shang tinatabihan kapag wala sha sa bahay nyo.   Unfortunately meron talaga sigurong mga taong walang delikadesa at kahihiyan.  Sana karmahin sila soon.