Out of the league

[fleur_de_liz]

Guys just a question are you guys intimidated with girls that you think are out of your league.
Just an example if a guy is so simple. simple employee of a company, simple living, independent, not too pa-sosyal, not too out going, average looking and mentality. if that's the guy's case how will you feel if your girl is: a manager, earns much compare to a guy who just work as a staff from a company, a girl from a good school with good education, sexy, pretty, popular, strong personality, not the typical pa-girl attitude na masyadong clingy sa guys. this girl shows a girl power within. what if the girl shows the miss independent type. do you feel na she's out of your league. will you be proud of her or mahihiya si guy sa kung ano meron si girl.

is there a threat ba? or will it cause you guys to feel bad and possibility for guys leave the girl because guy might think na he's not worthy to be her guy?

[DM101]

my ex-gf is a commercial model... maganda, sexy, maputi, earns alot... while i am an average guy lang, di naman siguro ugly, but brown skin, not tall, may car na 1994 model lang... but never-the-less, i didnt feel na she's so high and i am not... kahit pa pag nasa airport kami is hindi na nya kailangan pumila dahil special treatment sya lagi.. and kahit na nasa airplane na kami and the flight attendant na guy is nagpapa-cute.. still, i just feel proud for her.. or maybe for me din... lol

[fleur_de_liz]

so it's like you're proud kasi ikaw yung bf? is that it?

[simang]

Madalas when we're out together i get this look from people that kind of tells me "how did you get that guy" he seems to be a little out of my league, very good looking and charming and lahat na yata ng babae sa office nila may crush sa kanya. Even our common friend was surprised when she knew na kami na kase she knows na hindi ako yung tipo ni bf. while i, on the other hand, is just average looking. Several times though, sabi nya sa akin na overwhelmed pa din sya that we're together. On his part naman, he feels that i'm out of his league mostly because of how I am professionally, and sa family background. He thinks im too smart, too 'out there', too intelligent for him.

At the back of my head, kahit na madaming nagpaparamdam sa akin na sobrang gwapo nya for me, iniisip ko na eh sino bang pinili nya? Much so now, sino bang papakasalan nya? Ako.

I guess may mga guys na madaling maintimidate just because the girl's out of their league. But here's the thing -- a guy who dont  want to pursue you just because you're out of his league, doesn't like you enough. It just means na his hiya is bigger than his want to be a part of your life.

[sacred cow]

not really, usually mga girls na kilala kong ganyan may "attitude" problem and princess complex kaya natuturn off din ako

question pabalik, bakit parang andaming girls na nagtatanong ng ganitong klaseng question?

[Girltalker2]

^ natawa naman ako "princess complex" haha

Maraming nagtatanong ng ganyang question kasi maraming insecure na Pinoy. IMO lang naman. I don't think I am way out of their league, pero ni hindi maka complete ng sentence. Ka turn off. Mga professionals naman at graduate, licensed pa nga minsan. Di ko lang alam anong ginagawa nila sa English classes nila doon.

[DM101]

so it's like you're proud kasi ikaw yung bf? is that it?

yup, something like that.. proud of myself and proud of her..

[fleur_de_liz]

@girltalker2, true.. turn off din ako sa mga ganun. lolz

[sacred cow]

^ natawa naman ako "princess complex" haha

Maraming nagtatanong ng ganyang question kasi maraming insecure na Pinoy. IMO lang naman. I don't think I am way out of their league, pero ni hindi maka complete ng sentence. Ka turn off. Mga professionals naman at graduate, licensed pa nga minsan. Di ko lang alam anong ginagawa nila sa English classes nila doon.

pero could it be na sometimes yung mga babaeng ganito ang insecure kasi walang guys na lumalapit sa kanila tapos yung mga babaeng iniisip nilang below their level ang nagugustuhan ng most guys?

minsan kasi it's not all about a person's status, paano kung maganda nga, mayaman at maganda career pero masyado namang condescending tapos nangmamata ng ibang tao...nakaka turn off din naman, meron din namang ibang babae diyan who might not have all the attributes you mentioned pero mas gusto mo pang ka-date kasi hindi nakakairitang kasama.

 and fleur, I think mali din yung title ng thread mo..it shouldn't be "Out of the league" but "Out of your league"/"Out of the guy's league" unless you're pertaining to someone like Donald Sterling who's been banned from the NBA, e out of the league na talaga yun

[fleur_de_liz]

nice one sacred cow. lolz.
actually im just wondering how guys will feel. will they be intimidated with those kind of girls or mas magiging proud pa sila. im pertaining to a bf/gf thingy an ha? like if you're the boy and your gf is the typical "all of it" kind of girl then as a boy ikaw yung tipong "average" of everythign so sa madaling salita mas angat sayo si girl in all aspects in life. will you be proud of your girl or you think matatapakan yung pride mo?

[sacred cow]

^ proud siyempre, it means that I have something na wala sa ibang guys for a girl like that to choose to be with me, sinong alpha ngayon?

[fleur_de_liz]

nice naman your answer. may ibang guys kasi na they're feeling undermine pag nasa ganun situation sila. lalo na if the girl earns more than what guy earns at kung mas mataas position ni girl. parang guys will feel na useless sila at nagiging intimidated.

[simang]

It all depends sa confidence ng lalaki i guess. If the guy has absolutely nothing to offer, it's either he'll be overly proud of the girl that's out of his league, or pwede ding maapakan ego nya.

Basta dapat parehas kayong confident in your own way, if one of you feels less of a person in the relationship, then hindi yun healthy for both parties

[slickchick]

i think i asked a similar question before in another GT thread - intimidating ba sa guy if a girl is ms. independent? ms independent meaning - earns her own keep, has her own mind -- not the pasaway type naman, but yung tipong she can say "no" to her guy when she really means no (hindi lang oo ng oo). i remember i asked this dun sa thread, kasi i've had a bad experience with an ex who has insecurity issues (because he does not have a stable job).

personally i think if both parties has enough confidence and self-respect, it will be reflected on how they treat their partner (applicable to both girls/guys). if the guy is confident enough with himself, he does not need to exercise "power or ego tripping" on his gf just to show who wears the pants in the relationship. sa girls naman, hindi naman siguro dapat na i-rub pa sa bf/guy kung mas angat ka sa kanya. instead, help him na lang dun sa area na sa palagay mong less sya syo. a relationship should not be a competition between the gf/bf to prove who's better. just my two cents worth ah..

[whitebishop]

I think most people who are in relationships are those who can identify to each other.  So kung tipong artista ka and tipong tambay sa kanto yung ka relasyon mo, I think hindi masyado magtatagal yung relationship or it's a long journey for them.  common people pursue partners whom they can identify with. so kung tipong entry level na employee wont pursue a manager simply because one would not be able to identify with the other.  also comes in a factor of confidence level. syempre yung underdog will have some insecurities because of the gap in the stature.  lastly, i think men generally falls for the girl who thinks they can give something to the girl.  take the case of madam auring who had series of relationships with younger guys who are under achievers, it didn't work out.  just my 2 cents.

[Girltalker2]

nice naman your answer. may ibang guys kasi na they're feeling undermine pag nasa ganun situation sila. lalo na if the girl earns more than what guy earns at kung mas mataas position ni girl. parang guys will feel na useless sila at nagiging intimidated.

So paano nila naging GF kapag intimidated si guy?  Kung di man lang maka porma? hehe

It all depends sa confidence ng lalaki i guess. If the guy has absolutely nothing to offer, it's either he'll be overly proud of the girl that's out of his league, or pwede ding maapakan ego nya.

Basta dapat parehas kayong confident in your own way, if one of you feels less of a person in the relationship, then hindi yun healthy for both parties

I firmly believe kasi na halos tinitingala mo normally ang BF/GF mo, kung baga kaya ka na attract sa kanya kasi meron kamangha mangha sa kanya na di mo nakikita sa iba.  So dapat ang BF proud sa GF nya and vice versa, at proud din sila sa sarili nila for having their partners. 

Agree ako na hindi healthy ang relationship kung may inggit or insecure factor. Tipong I am no good for her or for him. Ang peg mo dapat lagi ay, I AM THE BEST PERSON FOR MY PARTNER kaya ako ang partner nya.    Otherwise, there's something wrong.

my ex-gf is a commercial model... maganda, sexy, maputi, earns alot... while i am an average guy lang, di naman siguro ugly, but brown skin, not tall, may car na 1994 model lang... but never-the-less, i didnt feel na she's so high and i am not... kahit pa pag nasa airport kami is hindi na nya kailangan pumila dahil special treatment sya lagi.. and kahit na nasa airplane na kami and the flight attendant na guy is nagpapa-cute.. still, i just feel proud for her.. or maybe for me din... lol

Proud ka kasi pogi points ba yun?  Tipong nakaisa ka at di makaisa ang ibang guys?  Ego ba?
Just curious.

But I agree with the confidence argument.  Mapa lalaki man o babae, importante na confident ang partner mo sa sarili nya at sa partner nya.  But there should be a distinction between confidence and being mayabang or being full of oneself (ie princess complex or feeling johnny bravo).

[jtansanco]

Based on the question, I'm guessing they're already bf/gf right? If that's the case, I'll be proud that I have a girl like her. For her to be with him, it shows I have something that hasn't seen in other guys. There's no threat but it just depends on how the guy think of the situation. But again, if they are bf/gf already, then no worries for the guy.

[Crazylabel]

I think this will happen if the other partner didn't grow and the other did (improved career, goal achieved, etc). The feeling that you were left behind? So you're most likely to pull yourself down because you suddenly feel insecure, lack self-esteem/self confidence instead of just being happy for your partner.

[sugardrop]

I never felt like he's out of my league even when someone I know asked to see a photo of his and when I showed it, she literally looked at his photo, then to me, then back to his photo, then back to me. Then asked, "Model sya dati? Ano nakita nya kaya sayo?" I just laughed then told her, "Something you probably don't have". If he makes me feel insecure and not assured, I would've felt that way and all the more insulted with that nasty remark.

Like @simang, whenever we're together, he never fails to turn a few heads - both female and gays alike - but just looks at me and we both stick out tongues out and laugh at it. Now if sobrang obvious na nagpapapansin, ang iniisip ko lang, "You can look but you can't touch". I feel proud whenever that happens but I feel even prouder that he chose to be with me even though there are a lot of pretty girls out there.

Funny thing is before we started dating, he felt that way about me and even asked "Magkagusto ko kaya sa isang tulad ko?" when I was also thinking of that very same question.

We all have insecurities and we shouldn't feel that way towards our partners because there has to be something in us that they got really attracted to that they musn't have seen in others

[Bud]

For me, it is more about being practical. yung marunong ilugar ang sarili.

Unless, nakakaturn-off yung character ng Girl like judging a person kasi di marunong mag-english or dahil di magaling ang accent sa english.......ang babaw